Heaven's Pov
I r-raped her?! I raped her...
I raped a fucking 14 years old and I don't know about it?!!! Such an idiot am I!!
I broke her.. Her Innocence,her childhood..
H-how could I do that to such a kind hearted woman, Leir? How could I do that to my love?
I took her innocence in such a young age and Impregnated her.. And then after 3 years we'd met again...and that time I'd hurted her feelings so many times and insulted her..i don't do any good for her.. While S-she..She always protect me and love me..
I love her.. Am I worthy of her love?after I've done cruel things to her?
I think not.. She deserves someone else..Someone that better than me, Someone that will cherish her forever and not tend to hurt her..
But Could I tend to see her with someone else?
I shook my head and let a tirely laugh..
I will break loose and choose to Die If i see her with someone else..
I love her too much to the point that I can't endure the pain that Ive feeling right now because of thinking that..
I clutched my chest tightly and
I slowly lean my back to the door, while my tears continuously running down on my face and I don't have urges to wipe it.
"It so fucking h-hurts" I mumbled while Gripping my fist tightly
This is so fucking hurts think that I could die because of this pain..
I close my eyes and breathe hardly.. While Im calming myself,I remembered again the time when Devin came to talk to me about Leir...and also that time that I lose her...
Flashback
"Talk" I coldly said to Devin when we got way ourselves to the garden..He sit infront of me and stares at me seriously..
"I want to talk about Leir.. I want to tell you now her secret that she keeps hiding from you..She pleads to me not to tell you this, b-but I think this is the best way to tell you this..so that you can understand her now fully"
I raised my eyebrow because of what he said.. Secret? What secret that she keeps hiding from me?
I inhaled deeply and waiting to continue his telling while keeping my mouth shout
"Leir..she's suffering in DID or knownly called multiple personality." I stilled of what my brother said.. What? DID? H-how? I didn't notice it.. Is he telling the truth or just making a fucking story again?!
I intently stared at his eyes and searching the lies in there but I see nothing..
My brother Devin.. He's Saying the truth.
I roughly ruffed my hair and still continue to listen
"I've met her alter ego Cia,2 years ago and that time I fell inlove with her..funny right?!.. I fell inlove with Leir's alter ego! And I only got to know her disorder when I came back home here..First.. I can't accept it because It hurts knowing that your woman that you love so much, is just an alter?!!"
Devin frustrately said.. I laugh and remembered his little rendezvous with Leir..
"Don't fucking kidding me Twin..I caught you kissing Leir and you've been fooling me since you came back here!! " i angry said.but Devin just shook his head..
"Believe me.. Leir is just a friend to me.. She's not Cia that I love.. They're so different..Leir is so much inlove with you Heaven but her alter ego Cia is inlove with me and so am I..thats why every time Leirs consciousness was weak..Cia taking over her body so that Cia and I can have a little moment to each other even just a short period of time..but our rendezvous didn't last long because of Leir.. When Cia told it to Leir.. She was gone mad at us.. "Mahal ko ang kapatid mo Devin, kaya sana tanggapin mo na rin na hindi na kayo magsasama pa ni Cia.. Wag nyo na akong gamitin sa pansarili nyong kaligayahan.. Patawad".."And that was she said to me and agreed to her.. I should end my love to Cia because theres no chance to be with her even I could do all my best.. It will just useless.."
Then after saying that.. My brother cried.. Hes crying infront of me.. While am I.. Still thinking and analyzing all about he said..
Several minutes past,Devin was now stop crying but his head was still leaning at the table..
I stood up and leave him there..
I don't know what to do now after knowing that.. Should I believe that Leir and Devin didn't betrayed me? If is it true.. Is there changes will be happen to me or not?
I took a deep breath and clench my fist..
" The fuck I am doing infront of her door?? " I hissed, after realizing that my feet way me to ugly chanaks room..
I cursed and unconsciously my hand reach the doorknob to open the door.
I step back in and let my eyes scan the room.. Theres no more creepy things now..it is now empty and dusty room again..
Then while roaming myself at the room. Suddenly A red notebook that lying on the edge catches my attention.I slowly pick it up and open it.. In the first page of the book,theres a colorful lettering written on it. So I read..
"Reaching Heaven? " is this like a bible thing? I flip the secont page, and I got shocked of what I am seeing..
"Paano ko magiging boyfriend ang sobrang gwapong si Young Master na Heaven ang name pero demonyo naman ang ugali? "
"The hell?? She have planned seducing me all along? "
1.Unang una dapat maganda( Pero dyosa ako eh.. Kaya medyo nasobrahan hahhaha)
2.Dapat sexy din..( At check ako dun)
I chuckled.. She's really full of herself
3.Dapat malaki boobs(Dito ako di pinalad...flatchested ako mga momshy,ano nalang paglalaruan ng aking langit?)
"The hell? "
4.Uminon ng gatas araw araw(Yah..para sa boobs!..#maypagasa pa)
5.Bumanat ng mga malulupit na pick up line! (hmm matalino ang aking langit kaya dpat connected sa math or science ang banat ko😣😣 oras na para humingi ng tulong kay google)
I shook my head.. She got me there huh
"I thought that she's knowledgeable at science but I'm wrong" I murmured then continue to read her plan to take me.
6.Syempre dapat loyal ka. Kahit wala pang kayo(Aba syempre naman.. Si Young master lng ang gusto ko at wala ng iba.. Kahit masungit sya.. Gora padin ako 😂😂)
"Did you really mean that, Leir? "
I flip the next page and read all her words on it.. And while I'm reading.. I feel my hands start to trembling, my sweats coming out,and my breath start to hitch.
"Ginawa ko na lahat ng paraan sa aking langit Pero di parin nya ako ma crush back ano nang gagawin ko? "
"Hindi natuloy iyong 1st date namin ni Young Master..kasi sinundo nya yung kapatid nya..nasayang lang iyong effort namin ng mga pare ko.haha kagago ko kasi masyado akong umasa na seseryosohin nya ang date namin..pero sana man lang nag paalam sya sa akin ng personal para hindi ako tangang naghintay sa kanya,ang sakit.. Taena napaiyak nya ako dun"
"Hindi ko akalain na sa isang taong tulog ako eh ,iyong alter ego ko may naging kasintahan na pala at ang masaklap kambal pa ni Young Master..ano bang ginawa mo Cia? "
"Sinabi ko kay Devin na tanggapin nalang nya ang kapalaran nila ni Cia.. Wala naman ako magagawa.. Mahal ko si Young Master..Hindi ko kayang ipahiram ang katawan ko para sa iba,kasi ayaw kong magalit ang aking langit.. Diba nga loyal dapat ako? "
"Gusto ako ni Young Master!!!ang saya ko"
"Napagkamalan ni Young Master na may relasyon kami ni Devin kahit naman wala talaga. Hindi ko sya niloloko pero ayaw nya akong bigyan ng Chance para magpaliwanag.. Ang sakit lang..akala ko ba gusto nya ako? Kahit ba kunting tiwala, wala sya para sa akin?Di ko na alam gagawin ko.. Ang sakit.. Nasaktan nanaman nya damdamin ko pero ang nakakagago?mahal ko padin sya.. Tangina diba? "
"Aalis na ako mamaya,ayaw na nya akong makita pa.. Siguro nga.. Hindi talaga kami para sa isat isa.. Masyado akong nagpakampante eh sa katotohanang ako lang naman ang nagmamahal"
"L-leir" i stutter then I drop the notebook and leave at the room..
I need to see her..
End of Flashback.
I search everywhere..and even hired an Investigator just to find her. But it lead nothing...she's just gone like a thin air.. And that time...i realize that i already lost her.. I lost her because of my stupidity and my fucking pride..
After she gone to my life..I become miserable.. Every night I go to the bar and let my self wasted,my parents nor my friends can't stop me for destroying myself.. And I've been like that for almost 3 years but my life become normal again when Devin called me that Leir might come back to me and that gave me hope and strength...
And now.. Devin didn't disappoint me
Leir came back and she's with our son..and thats make me feel happy and hurt at the same time..
i open my eyes, and took a deep breath
"What should I do? To fix this messed? "
Leirs Pov
Kaya mo ito Leir. Dyosa ka.. Malalagpasan mo ito. AJA!
Humigop muna ako ng maraming hangin at bumuga ako ng paunti unti. Saka tumayo ng maayos at kumatok na ako ng tatlong beses sa kwarto ng aking Langit.
"Heaven.Buksan mo ito, magusap tayo. " pero wala man lang akong narinig na salita kaya sumigaw ulit ako
"Please. Wag mong sisihin iyong sarili mo, wala kang kasalanan. Diba napaliwanag ko naman ng buo? Kaya sana.. Buksan mo na ito please.. Gusto kong maging maayos na tayo.. Maging maayos na ang lahat.. Hindi ako galit,aking langit kaya please.. Buksan mo na itong pinto.. Kung di mo ito bubuksan wag kang magagalit kung sisirain kong itong pinto! " pero lumipas ang isang minuto ay hindi parin binubuksan ni Heaven ang pinto kaya nagsimula na akong mainis. Ano ito? Pabebe nanaman ba sya? Napahinga nalang ako ng malalim.
"Aking Langit. Alam mo ba kahit puro sakit ang naranasan ko sayo, sa makalipas na taon,mahal parin kita"
Tinaas ko ang aking kamay at nilapat ito sa pintuan.Saka sinimulang I tap ang mga daliri ko.Nang nakuha ko na ang rythm ay saka ako nagsimulang kumanta.
Please,open the door
Let me in.
And just listen,for awhile
This is my way ,of telling you, Its gonna be alright 🎶
Its so cold without your touch
I've been dreaming way too much
Can we just turn into reality? 🎶
Cause I've been thinking about you,My heaven 🎶
Maybe we could save each other from this crazy world
We lived in
and I know we could happen
Coz you know Ive been feeling you
And I know you love me too. 🎶
Saktong pagtapos ko ng kanta ko ay bumukas na ang pinto. At bumungad na sa akin ang gwapong mukha ng aking langit ngunit may malungkot na expression at basa pa ang pisngi nito dahil sa luha.
Lumapit ako dito at niyakap sya ng mahigpit.. Napipikit ako dahil sawakas nasa tabi ko nanaman sya..
"L-leir I love you too and I'm sorry for what ive done.. Please dont leave me" takot na takot na sabi nito pero imbis na sumagot ay lalo ko lang hinigpitan ang yakap ko sakanya na pinaparamdam na hinding hindi ko sya iiwan. Maya maya pa ay naramdaman ko ding yumakap na sya sa akin pabalik kaya lalong lumaki ang ngiti ko.
Ilang minuto pa kami nagyakapan bago kami kumalas sa isat isa. Ngiting ngiti ako sa harapan ng aking langit habang hawak ko ang kaliwang pisngi nito
"Alam mo naman siguro iyong phrase na, past is past it shouldn't never discussed?..Diba?Yun ata yun basta iyon!! " napakamot pa ako ng ulo dahil sa phrase na iyon
"Kaya sana palayain mo na iyong sarili mo sa sakit. Kasi ako tinanggal ko na ito 5 years ago simula ng malaman ko ang katotohanan.. Atsaka isa narin ang dahilan si Sheenray.. Ang anak natin..8 years syang walang ama. Heaven kaya sana.. Pag lumabas tayo sa kwarto mo. Ayos na ang pakiramdam mo at masaya kang haharap sa anak natin. Pwede ba iyon? "
Bigla namang gumaan ang pakiramdam ko ng unti unti itong tumango at ngumiti..
Tinanggal ko ang pagkakahawak sa pisngi nito at nilipat sa kanang kamay nito. Hinawakan ko ang kamay nya ng mahigpit at ganoon din sya sa akin.
"Handa ka na bang maging ama? " hindi ko alam. Kung bakit iyon ang lumabas sa labi ko. Pero napatawa nalang ang aking Langit at ngumiti ng matimis..
Mygod iyong panty ko!!
"I'm ready, baby"