AIKKA'S POV
I don't know.
Hindi ko alam kung ano ba dapat ang gawin ko.
Nakatingin lang ako sa glass window. I'm seeing the lights from this city. And its starting to rain heavily.
Napatingin ako kila dad and mom.
Nakatingin lang din sila sa akin while being quiet. They're giving me time to think about kanina.
I sighed.
"Aikka, bestie. I think it would be better if magrest ka muna ngayon. You can still think about it, sa pagising mo" Elaine said, trying to help me.
But how can't I think about it now?
And what on earth did his sister told him na naging ganon na lang ang decision niya? Was it still part of her plan?
Then suddenly, Nathan came back.
"where is Spade? did you find him?" dad asked.
"uh..yes Chairman. And...if its okay to all of you?, w_we'll talk about it" he said while looking at me.
I know that look.
I think.. he's about to confess something to me.
"then we will give you time. Sa labas muna kami" then he stood up and told everyone to get out for a while.
Kami na lang ni Nathan ang naiwan dito. Umupo siya near me.
"Nagkausap ba kayo ni Spade?"
"Oh yes, of course, we already talked"
So, his face' expression tells me that Spade was serious about breaking up with me.
"And to be honest, I got shocked too." he added.
"I can read it in your eyes Nathan, I know you're not" I said sa mahinang boses.
"No Aikka, its not that. I'm sad lalo na sa mga nangyari sa kanila ng kapatid niya. Then...this time, he suddenly decided to let you go." him.
"ano ba kasi ang sinabi ni Jenna sa kanya?"
"About the past. That's why I'm here to tell you the truth, kung bakit kailangan kitang ipagtulakan papalayo sa akin noon" He said then hinawakan niya ang kamay ko.
Wait. Parang feeling ko na iiyak na naman ako this time.
"You know..Aikka, I didn't do it because I don't love you anymore. I didn't do it because I got tired waiting for your answer. At lalong lalo na, hindi ko iyon ginawa dahil nililigawan ko si Princess, that time we're just really friends. She was just grateful dahil niligtas ko siya mula sa nga kamay ni Jenna"
"Then tell me the reason why you did it?" me na parang tutulo na ang aking mga luha.
Kasi he's starting to tell me na mali pala ang lahat ng iniisip ko about sa kanya noon. And nasasaktan ako, kasi nabuhay ako sa mga malulungkot na palaisipang iyon.
"Aikka, ginawa ko iyon para protektahan ka. She threatened me and my family, she threatened me na guguluhin ang buhay mo. And that time? masaya ka na eh..kaya tinalikuran ko ang feelings ko for you at sinunod ang gusto ni Jenna. Pero huli na ng marealize kong ako pala ang nagpapasaya sa iyo noon. I know na.....I've been coward that time, so gusto ko ring humingi ng sorry ngayon dahil, hindi kita nagawang ipaglaban."
I think...I'm going to faint dahil sa aking mga narinig.
Sobra na talaga ang mga ginawa ni Jenna sa buhay ko.
"Aikka, I'm sorry.."
And he keeps on talking but this time, ang kulog at buhos ng malakas na ulan ang tanging naririnig ko.
Until he said those words again...
"I love you Aikka..and I will always love you"
Napatingin ako sa kanya then he hugged me gently.
"Alam kong hindi ko na kaya pang ibalik ang nakaraan. Pero sana maintindihan mo ako kung bakit ko iyon nagawa."
"Nathan" tanging nasambit ko na lang sa mga oras na iyon.
"And Imissed you Aikka. I really missed you so much" bulong niya sa akin that made me cry.
Those words....
Ugh. Nagiging iyakin na naman ako.
When he noticed that I'm crying, agad niya itong pinunasan ng mga kamay niya. And dahan-dahan.....
Inilapit niya ang kanyang mga labi sa akin.
And kissed me,
On my forehead.
Unti-unti ng bumabalik ang dating Nathan na nakilala ko. I'm thankful na nakakaalala na siya.
Dahan-dahan kong hinawakan ang kanyang mukha at tiningnan siya sa kanyang mga mata. He's sincere naman about what he said to me kanina.
"Thank you...for telling me this. Now, I understand why you let me leave" then I smiled.
"ahem!" sabay kaming napalingon. Si dad.
Time is over na pala kaya nagsipasukan na silang lahat.
And agad na ring bumalik si Nathan sa kanyang pwesto kanina.
"Is everything alright sweetie?" worried na ask ni mom.
"of course tita, look at her.. she's blushing, so it means na...nabuhay na muli ang katawang lupa niya" Elaine said which made me feel awkward.
Did I blushed?
May panahon pa ba ako sa ganon knowing na I can hurt somebody?
They just laughed at me.
Hindi na lang ako umimik.
"By the way anak, Spade just called me and he said na maghihintay siya ng tatlong araw. Its up to you na daw kung...sino sa kanila ang pipiliin mo" dad said.
"Wah. I think, this would be the best thing na masisilayan ko in my life. I mean, sino nga ba sa kanila Aikka?" Abby asked me while gently patting my back.
That question.
I answered so many hard questions before..but this is a tough one.
Anyway, I still have three days to think.
Its about my future...kung sino ba talaga ang....mahal ko.
Is it my past or...still my present?