"What? You can't be serious." I nearly yelled at the 10th grade counselor. Ms. Biggs, (completely suited how big she was), sat at her little desk near the entrance. The school issued table was covered in papers and had a plastic apple clock on the corner. Her lips were pursed in annoyance. Apparently, I hadn't been the only one complaining about their schedule. She was making that part clear.
"Hill, it isn't my fault you and Chang here aren't in the same morning classes. Maybe you should have put some thought into it when you decided what to do with your life last year," she stated with a yawn. I kept myself from picking up the clock and hurling it into her front teeth. Like that bear knew anything about me, and obviously she hadn't decided what to do with her own life. She had a chance at one and look where she is now. Back in school. I could burn something with my eyes if I wanted to.
Mara rested her hand on my arm, attempting to put out my fumes.
"It's okay. I'll be seeing you before and after school, at lunch, and in two of the afternoon classes. You'll be fine."
I tried to believe her. Reluctantly I took my schedule from the outstretched paw of Miss. Biggs, and started on towards Geometry while Mara went to Algebra.
"If she was at normal standards we'd be in the same class."
That wasn't fair though. Mara works really hard and I have no right to be mad at someone struggling. Especially because she deals with me on a regular basis. When I got to the door there were students already lined up outside. They were silent, which was... strange. Most of them actually looked a little nervous, or scared. But of a math teacher? The girl in front of me was writing something, but I didn't want to read it. For all I knew it was personal.
That's when our teacher stepped out.
"Good morning students, why don't you head in and take a seat," she said with a smile. I don't understand why they all look like they could piss themselves. She didn't look threatening. I mean, she had midway neck long dirty blond hair, was a little bit taller than me at about 5'5, and wore glasses. She was probably in her forties if I wasn't mistaking. What was so bad about this?
"Thank god," the girl mumbled. She turned around and passed me the paper she had been writing on. I decided to read it then, since I was at the back anyway.
This woman is crazy! We've tried going into class three times now. The first being that we were talking and not in a good line. The second was that we were talking, and the third- well you were here for it. At that point I was so motivated to get in the stinkin class that I just walked in and out like a zombie. You're lucky you were late. I'm Tina btw :)
"Well that makes sense I guess."
But still. She is literally fist-bumping every student on their way into class. When she got to me she smiled. Like I was special. When I sat down everyone had the same surprised look as me. I suppose she must have given all of us the same smile, like a mother.
"My name is Miss. Zeigler. That is pronounced z-gl-err. I plan on learning every one of your names by the end of the week, so if I get it wrong don't shoot me, but kindly correct me and I'll treat you with the same respect."
The class went by smoothly with us getting to know each other, and my next two periods did similar activities. It was photography that threw me for a loop.
There, sitting in the third to last row of desks, was Jazmyn Witman.
I loathed Jazmyn, that might even be an understatement. Don't get me wrong, she wasn't ugly or anything. Her hair was brown with blond highlights and she had doll eyes. But this girl I swear. The way she treated me was so foul, and all I could do was act annoyed. Most of the time it just hurt. Taking my seat in the back row I stared at the back of her head, slightly wanting to rip it off. I told her I would be taking this class, and here she is. My shadow that rose to popularity once she abandoned me. She swirled just to look me in the eyes, and I really want some other kid to talk to her instead.
"Oh! Caroline I didn't know you'd be in this class, what a coincidence," she breathed, batting her eyelashes that framed huge emeralds. Green-eyed monster couldn't have fit better.
"Sure. Right. This is quite the interesting coincidence," I responded while making my voice drown in sarcasm.
"I just had the best idea!"
"Oh yea, what would that be?"
"I should make a collage of you, care bear."
With that she whipped out her camera and blinded me.
"Positively revolting," she whispered with a smirk. I just rolled my eyes. Like that was going to set me on edge.
We practiced uploading pictures from our cameras to the cloud, emails, or just our phones. I enjoyed this even though I already knew how to do it all. I helped out a couple of newbies, and got grateful looks in return. By the end of it I felt pretty good until I saw some kids snickering. Glancing down at one of the phones, my eyes widened in disbelief.
I was staring back up at myself. It was the picture Jazmyn took, and the way it was taken made it look like I was on drugs.
"How did you get that?" I asked, fearing the answer.
"Oh yea, this? Jazmyn Witman sent it to like, all her contacts that go to this school. I'm pretty sure that at least half the 10th grade has seen it-" his friend had elbowed him while staring at me, signaling him to not continue.
As soon as the bell rang I rushed into the hallway.
Walking out all I wanted to do was go home. People stared, and it felt like eyes were scratching at the gates to my soul. It was uncomfortable, and I couldn't do anything about it. Considering they'd already seen that stupid photo.
I wouldn't let it get to me though. No, not this time. For every person who's eyes lingered, I smiled. Maybe if I showed kindness they would leave me be.
I tried to get to lunch as fast as I could while the whispers seemed to increase volume.
"Omg is that the girl from Jaz's text?"
"Look at her!"
"What's up with those bangs?"
The insults seemed to stay the same. They just repeated what was said over and over again. How could people be this rude?
"Ew, so much pink!"
My smiles only grew wider.
"I can't believe I have a class with that," huffed a girl I couldn't recognize.
"They don't mean it."
"No wonder she's all by herself."
"Keep walking, they're just being gossipy teens."
"I bet you 5 bucks she's like, actually a crackhead."
There was an eruption of laughter.
I took a right turn into the girls bathroom and tried not to cry.
♡♡♡♡♡
"How has your morning been so far?" Mara asked before taking out a box.
"It was great! I had so much fun meeting new students, and the teachers were so kind!" I fibbed while my gaze wandered all over the room. I didn't want Mara to freak out over what happened, and at this point I was just hoping she wouldn't notice the puff to my eyes. Of course I had tried and failed at not letting things get the better of me. I had thought about every little remark, word, and whispered phrase. I allowed them to remain present in my mind. It's not like I haven't thought them myself before.
Why is it so easy to cry?
The cafeteria was pretty loud, so it drowned out comments on my... image if you will.
Mara smiled.
"Well that's good. I was worried that people would start talk. You know, just because you're different you don't have to be pestered by those spoiled snobs."
With that she opened the dumplings and ate. I took out my own lunch and glanced around the big room. Jazmyn was watching me and waved a camera, as if ready to snap another photo at any moment. Rolling my eyes I did my best to ignore the girl. Opening my lunch I found Shoyu Ramen.
One of my favorites.
Taking out chopsticks I went to take a bite and there was a flash. Looking up I saw Jazmyn lower her camera, satisfaction all over her face as she checked the screen and showed it to her friend. The two laughed.
"Great, just flippin great. Yes, I totally need another one of those floating around."
I continued to eat, wanting to break something.
Mara saw the change in my manner, and turned around to lock eyes with camera girl. Even though she wasn't facing me, I could tell that she was glaring.
"Is that one bothering you?" she pointedly asked and put down her own chopsticks.
"Oh! No no no, that's just Jazmyn," I responded, waving my hands around like a mad woman. I was glad she couldn't see my face. "We're in photography together and share similar interests."
Mara stared for a moment longer.
"Why did she take a photo of you then?"
"Uhhh... bingo!"
I mustered up my trash acting and faked excitement.
"She draws too and said that she takes pictures of people when in need of references. Isn't that cool?"
"Wow, real smooth."
"I guess," she replied, finally turning back around. It was obvious that she still wasn't fully convinced.
"I don't trust her but I'll take your word for it," she sighed as we continued to eat. Mara had only come to this school close to the end of 9th year, so she had no idea of what happened between us, and what lead to my ridicule. I intended to keep it that way.
"Awesome! Now I have to pretend that butternut squash is my friend!"
"Four words."
"Sugar."
"Honey."
"Iced."
"Tea."
Yea that's right. Of course. In my state, right now, I fake cussed. Yay me!
I ate the rest of my lunch in silence for the most part. It was really good, cheering me up a little as munched on the food. Of course food, of all things, was making me feel better. I curse it.
Mara finished before me, which was good. At least she wasn't starving herself anymore. As I scooped up the last of the noodles Mara waved me over from across the cafeteria.
"How in the wizarding world of harry potter did she get over there?!"
Shoving all my stuff back in my bag I went over.
"What?"
"Come on, take a picture with me next to the school mascot."
I looked up at a roaring statue of Prince the Panther.
"Uh... no."
"Oh come on, just one, please," Mara asked with puppy eyes, dragging out the end to please. It was adorable. But... well what was the harm anyway?
"Fine, but I better not find this on your lock screen."
With that Mara squealed, pulling out her phone.
"Ok now let it out with a big grrr!" she quoted as we posed. She had her free hand extended like she had claws.
"Mara, that's Thumper from Bambi and you know it."
"Oh hush up and strike a pose Grumpy."
"Now we're doing Snow White? Pick a movie girl!"
"Caroline!"
She accidentally took the photo when we were giggling but I didn't care. It really wasn't that bad, and we looked so filled with joy just to be there.
When I glanced back down at the phone she was already disobeying my one request.
"Mara!"
"What it's a cute picture!"