08/14/08 *Night
I never noticed how we easily give our hearts away to people we barely even know. Love is indeed a strange thing to us.
At the same time, it teaches us the cruelness of reality.
"Hey, Anna, how do you feel if it is love when faced with the opposite sex?" I asked as the question played around my head. She kept eating the chocolate twirled cocoa vanilla ice cream without minding me.
"Anna, I asked you a question," I said again looking at her while it seems like she doesn't hear anything. "Anna..." I pounded my hands at the table. "Hmm? What is it?" It reached her.
"Are you thinking of that kid again?" Calling him a guy gross me out for some reason. I said with a scowl expression.
"Ah, no. I was thinking of the portrait, I planned to paint." Is it true though? She said without dropping an emotion between her words.
What a best friend am I...
"Oh really, based on what I've seen you've been thinking about that person," I said bluntly. If the wounds will reopen then let it be.
"Troy? No, I mean I did remember some of our good times together that's just it. Anyway it seemed like you wanted to ask me something." Just hearing that kid's name makes me mad.
"Yeah, I asked you how will you be certain when it is love you're feeling from the opposite sex?" It's kinda embarrassing to say it again to be honest.
"One thing is clear when you're in love with someone. You can't forget him he always pops up in your mind. Well, talking about love when I just get cheated on. It really tells me it's you I'm talking to Ai."She said looking relieved. I just wanted to know though. So I don't have any choice.
"Anyway are you done eating? I need to go home and feed the cats." I paid the order and grabbed my bag. "Can I stay at your place tonight Ai?" She asked in a gloomy tone.
Considering that she just got cheated on I guess it's my responsibility to be there for her for the time being. "Yeah, you can feed the cats while you're staying you loved Neeko right?" I said in a soft voice.
"I can? Thanks, Ai!" Her smile was filled with happiness. I guess it wasn't bad to let her stay for the night. "Also when did you use the nickname Ai?" I looked at my phone to check the time. "Don't you like it?" She asked as we walk down the road. "It's not a matter of liking it or not it's just-"
"Then you do like it." Her smile illuminated the colorless streets. "Ok, it's fine to call me Ai if you want to." I wasn't left with an option. "Thanks, Ai!" She leaped and hugged me in the back.
"Let's go it'll be bad if we miss the bus," I shrugged.
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The streetlights were spewing loneliness as the night beckons it. My own feelings discombobulate me. Will I also experience being dumped as Anna? Did I ever felt being loved by someone of the opposite sex? What will I do if I'm faced with the same problem as Anna? Such questions sank through me, I wanted an answer.
I pushed the button that signals to get off the bus. I reached through my pocket to grab the keys for the front door. A cat's voice was heard. "Meow..." At my back was Anna gazing through the sky, her eyes were sharp.
"Feel at home and you can put your belongings in the living room. If you want to change clothes go to the left and the farthest corner of the hallway is the bathroom." As I've said with ease, I went upstairs to get change and I boiled some water for tea. "Thanks, by the way can I borrow some clothes? I didn't bring any." She said before opening the door to the bathroom. "I guess I can lend you some clothes." I left it at the front door and opened the sliding door and admired the scenery on the balcony.
*whistling noises* As I heard the kettle whistling I poured the water to the cup and made some tea.
"How strange is life." I muttered without noticing Anna was there. "Why is it strange?" She asked as she stretched out her hand to get the cup of tea. "My mind is just filled with questions. I often feel like this at night." I replied with an honest answer.
"Do you want to talk about it?" She questioned while she sips the tea. "Sure, since your opinion might help me understand things better." I don't have any reason to decline anyway. "Tell me." She replied. "Then what are you feeling right now? Is it hate, regret, frustration?" I asked a light one.
"I feel relieved. I mean I kinda saw it coming so I easily accepted it."She said without raising a tone. As I observed her I got the impression of a matured lady.
"Well that's enough drama for the day. What do you want to do?" I tried changing the mood of the room. It wasn't healthy for the both of us. "You told me to feed Neeko right? I think we should just relax and eat." She replied as she refill her cup. "I almost forgot. Then I'll see what I can make." I took Neeko to the living room and let Anna feed her. I opened the fridge and reheat the left overs of yesterday's beef stew and added some extra meat.
The wind was somewhat cold as it caress our skins. I felt uneasy about how tomorrow will be like. Shall where should I even begin to tell you what happens next? As the time marches forward it didn't bother slowing for me. I guess that's how it works in this world.
Only thing is clear from now on. I don't want to be forgotten.