You will lose if you just know half of the knowledge.
Li Jun Jie
***
Xiao Ran was here when I opened my eyes and there were two maids behind her. I felt a bit awkward when they bowed to me.
"Lady, how did you sleep?" She asked.
I sat and saw Jin Er was waking up before me. Last night Aunty brought her to me before I slept. How do I know? Because I can't sleep.
But I don't respond to her questions. How I can sleep while Jin Er cried in the midnight and wanted me to carry her. So all night I carried her in my embrace. I didn't angry. Perhaps I can't. That's weird because I just fine with that and I feel Jin er looks like my reflection.
My back is still in pain like there is fire burning my skin. That same fire again.
"Lady. Are you alright?"
"Uhm.." I still endure the pain and give the baby to a maid nearest to me. "Please leave me now." I ordered.
That pain makes me understand that I will change again into my man body. I must endure this pain. Even so hurt being Li Jun Jie but I still want to be a Li Jun Jie the son of Li Jun Yang. Even the world condemns my family but I wanna live as Li Jun Jie. So I have to bear this pain.
Fortunately, Xiao Ran was asked the maids to leave this room. Just both of us in this room. I turned my face because I don't want anyone to see me in this state, especially her.
"Xiao Ran, turn your face don't look at me!" I shouted because of unbearable pain in my back. I close my eyes because this pain is almost unbearable for me.
"Young Master-"
I raise my hand to stop Yu Wen.
"Yu Wen bring me my clothes!" I shouted as the pain almost made me faint.
"Yes!"
"Xiao Ran, please .... I want to take a bath."
"I was preparing all for Young Master Li." Xiao Ran answers without seeing me.
"Xiao Ran, thank you. Xiao Ran, could you please turn your face right now." I ordered but my voice is so weak.
"Yes."
When my body totally turns into my man body. I can see the darkness.
"Young Master!"
***
This time I know that I am waking up in my original body as Li Jun Jie. I don't know what I should feel. I see Yu Wen here.
"Young Master...."
Yu Wen is approaching me.
"Yu Wen, I wanna sit."
Yu Wen helped me to sit. I feel pain all over my body but I don't want Yu Wen to know what I feel now because I have to do a lot of things.
"Young Master-"
"Yu Wen, I want to bathe. Please prepare my clothes...."
"I had prepared all for the Young Master. Don't worry."
"Uhm..."
As they had said before with this body, I just feel the pain all over my body. I don't understand why this body becomes so weak.
"Young Master!" Xiao Ran who is in my chamber is approaching me. She looks so startled yet worried.
"Xiao Ran, After bathing please help me to get out of this manor."
"Young Master...."
"Xiao Ran, I will come back again. I don't want people in this manor to look at me with this appearance. I have to get out of this manor. Please take care Jin Er for a while."
"I will help young master Li but let me follow you."
"I don't want people to see you with me. Cheng Sheng Lin's people are still chasing us. I don't want to put you and Huang's family into trouble."
"Young Master, if they are still chasing both of you, Xiao Ran, think better if you are staying here."
"I know but not as Li Jun Jie." I take a deep breath and see Xiao Ran. "We will be back soon. I don't want them to see me like this. This matter can't spread. They will be suspicious if you follow me. Just let the Old Man know about this matter."
"Yes, Young Master."
I know Xiao Ran feels unwilling but I need to go outside and I want to enjoy myself as a man even if I have to die. I wanna die as Li Jun Jie, not as that woman.
"Thank you Xiao Ran."
I get dressed with clothes that Yu Wen brought before. I will not tell anyone if I am in great pain right now. Xiao Ran asked the Old Man to help us to get out of Huang's manor. It's not difficult for him to do that because we are at the city gate in a blink of eyes.
" Young Master has to come back here if something happens. Please bring this hair pin with you."
"It will help you." He explained then he disappeared in white smoke.
We are going to leave Huang's manor. This time I can feel my time being shorter. I take a glance at Yu Wen who is always walking beside me.
People say the Southern area is known as a remote area but what I saw when I arrived here made me startled because the Southern area is like a city. I never expected the Southern area can Beautiful city at night with a lot of lanterns along the street.
"Young Master. Where will we go?" Yu Wen asked.
"I don't know. I just want to enjoy my time as myself. I know it's useless but..."
"Young Master please don't say such words."
"Why? I have to face reality and I am just mortal so I will live in this world someday but don't worry because I will kill Cheng Sheng Lin before I die." I said.
I have to find a way to kill Cheng Sheng Lin no matter what. I will kill him. I just heard a rumor about him saying that he is a cruel man but I never thought Cheng Sheng Lin who was always kind towards Jing Er would kill my family just like that. That pain will never be erased. I will kill him as Li Jun Jie. I am not a coward.
"Young Master, what are you thinking about? Do Young Master still think about Jia Ming Yue?"
"Why....why... why do you have to mention her?" I would be so nervous if Jia Ming Yue was mentioned by someone.
She is my first love and until now Jia Ming Yue still has a chamber in my heart. Even though I am not a good man, I will do everything to make her happy. I will not let them catch her. I will not let her die. I promise to keep her alive as long as I am breathing.
***