On Friday Felix and I had a talk with two of the site's users during lunch. Simon sat through the giggling and conversation by using his phone, while I managed to survive by squeezing my thigh anytime the girl in front of me smiled or tried to unsuccessfully wink at Felix. I wasn't sure if the fact that he didn't notice made me happy — okay, it did — really happy.
"I'm glad to hear that you're enjoying it," he mumbled, scribbling into his notepad with a green-inked pen.
"It's no problem at all," the dark-haired girl said as she smirked at him. The dark-skinned girl with purple braids sitting beside her seemed like she was in the same boat as me. I mean, I've never seen someone pull so many irritated facial expressions in the span of thirty minutes.
"Okay. I guess I'll try and eat now. Are you eating anything now?" Felix asked, turning his head to look at me. I waved him off, looking through the notes I'd also made. The girls eventually left, and I chuckled a little when I spotted the girl with purple braids scold the girl that had been hitting on Felix. They were both sophomores, and they both wandered back to their unofficial area around the cafeteria's serving point.
Lunch ended soon after, and I headed to class with Ji-Hun while Wyatt headed for biology. Class dragged on, and I smiled when a notification popped on my laptop as Ji-Hun and I worked on our animation video. Felix had messaged me, and he continued to do so throughout the rest of the period. Maybe he'd read into my improved mood and was being friendly again.
When school ended I followed Aiyana and Ji-Hun into the main hall for the Friday council meeting. Amanda was at the door, greeting everyone that passed through it casually. I looked away from her when I noticed her smile visibly dim at the sight of me.
Act like you know nothing.
Pep talking myself, I followed Ji-Hun to the tables at the right side of the room, before settling down beside one. Everyone in the hall was chatting, and eventually, Felix came into the room, making people get up and move to the seats they were supposed to be occupying.
"See you later guys," Aiyana said, putting loose strands of hair behind her ears as she got up from her seat and headed to the corner where other year heads were seated.
Felix soon got to the circular wooden table at the center with Amanda. They ran through the usual address of issues format before we all split up into groups to work on what we had to do. I was with Simon, Ji-Hun, and two other council members. Felix came to sit by me, and I couldn't help feeling flushed anytime out thighs would touch or when our hands would bump against each other when trying to reach out for something.
Simon and Ji-Hun seemed to be arguing every fifteen minutes since Ji-Hun was left-handed and Simon was right-handed. Their hands kept bumping into each other on the overcrowded table. The meeting soon came to a close, and Felix thanked everyone for their hard work as they put the tables and chairs away. I was leaving the room with Ji-Hun and Aiyana when I felt a hand take a hold of mine.
I turned, meeting Amanda's blue eyes framed by dark red brows cocked in a frown. I opened my mouth, but she raised a finger with a blue painted nail to her lips to make me keep quiet. I closed my mouth, watching as she reached out for the door and closed it.
"Finally, I got you alone," she sighed, making me look back to find out that we were indeed the only ones left the hall.
"I wanted to talk to you about Felix." She took a deep breath, rubbing her hands together before bringing them to her freckled face.
"Sorry for the odd ritual, but it makes me calm down a bit," she said with a small smile. I nodded as I found myself tightening my hold on the strap of my backpack.
"You and Felix are getting along, aren't you?" she said, making me shrug.
"Something like that..." I trailed, cut off by her sudden chuckling.
"Something like that," she repeated, mimicking my unsure tone. "It's always something like that for Felix," she said, sighing as she moved to stand by the table before resting her body weight on it.
"Do you like him?" she suddenly asked. I nodded, watching as she let out a low sigh in response.
"Do you think he likes you back?"
"I don't know. Maybe..." I trailed, feeling uncomfortable by her interrogation. Felix and I had sort of kissed - sure, but that didn't really mean anything. He just teased me for the most part. He'd told me he liked me, but things just seemed to have paled out.
"Well, what do you know," Amanda laughed.
"He's doing it again," she said as she shook her head.
"I'm sure what I'm about to say isn't the typical advice you would take from an ex-girlfriend, but please stay away from him." Amanda removed her weight from the table she'd been resting on, turning to look straight at me. "To put it plainly, he never knows what he wants. You're going to be another 'I don't know' case until he graduates. Save yourself."
I could feel my face grow hot as I took in her words. She had a point — she was speaking directly to my concerns.
"He'll be the one to come on to you, and still be the same one to retreat like a confused mouse," Amanda explained, making me bite my bottom lip as I tried to put what had been going on into perspective.
It did seem like that's what he had been doing.
"Felix is a great guy, believe me. He just sucks at relationships," she said before walking over to me.
"I can see you're putting so much emotional investment into him — don't." She smiled, making her already full face seem rounder. She then pat my cheeks affectionately before walking past me. I turned a bit, watching her leave me the hall by myself as she left through the door.
I stayed in the hall a bit, trying to calm myself down before leaving the hall for my locker. Surprisingly I found Aiyana, Ji-Hun, and Wyatt waiting for me.
"You guys waited?" I said as they removed their weights from the lockers they'd been resting on, waiting for me to change my books and lock up so that we could leave.
"Yup, that's what friends do..." Aiyana trailed before smiling oddly, her pearly white teeth making a beautiful contrast with her bronze colored complexion. "Plus, I wanted info. It was Amanda that held you back, wasn't it?"
I rolled my eyes, putting my backpack on again before turning and heading for the exit, effectively ignoring her. Aiyana whined for a bit but quieted down by the time we left the school compound in general.
The sun was setting early for some reason, but the pavements were as quiet as ever, and only sound of the slithering lizards, birds and the sound of our shoes threading against the concrete path tinted it.
As we were walking I felt my phone buzz in my pocket. I took it out, shielding the screen with a palm so that I could read what was on it. A small frown formed on my face when I noticed it was from Felix.
FELIX:
Hey, your friends told me that you were being held back by Amanda.
I looked at the screen, moving to the 'add reply' option.
ME:
Yes, she did. We had a talk.
I answered. I wanted to put my phone away, but I saw the speech bubble come up.
FELIX:
Oh, really? What about?
I sighed, feeling a bit frustrated by his question.
Really? What about? I repeated angrily in my head.
ME:
What are we?
FELIX:
Typing...
What?
ME:
What are we? Are we friends, boyfriends etc.
Typing...
I want to know.
I continued walking, eventually putting away my phone. Aiyana had wandered up front to walk in front of Ji-Hun and Wyatt, a small smile formed on my face when I noticed them holding hands. It was adorable really, especially the way Ji-Hun would squeeze Wyatt's hand once in a while as he talked to him.
My attention was soon stolen by the sound of my phone buzzing, making me take it out of my pocket. I didn't even need to unlock the screen to see the message Felix had sent to me. It hovered on the lock screen in form of a notification.
FELIX:
I don't know.
He doesn't know.
I felt like laughing, crying, and throwing a tantrum among other things, but it felt like if I was just dead inside, unable to find a suitable reaction to the reply.
I unlocked my phone, quickly sending a message back.
ME:
You don't know?
Typing...
You're one handsome idiot, aren't you?
I sent before turning my phone off and shoving it into one of the pockets of my jean trousers.