Tajima Sanzo, the 669th Demon King, was supposed to be training.
Instead, he was curled up in the dirt, wheezing like an asthmatic squirrel, while Beelzecluck stood nearby, watching with the dispassionate gaze of someone who had long since given up on expecting anything good.
"Okay… I admit it," Tajima gasped. "I suck."
Beelzecluck gave a long, judgmental bawk.
"Fine, fine! I REALLY suck! But hear me out—" Tajima sat up dramatically and pointed to the sky. "Physical labor is for suckers! Why struggle when I can just hire strong people to fight for me!?"
Beelzecluck gave him a look of pure disgust.
The system immediately roasted him.
[NEW QUEST UNLOCKED: STOP BEING USELESS BY EXPLOITING STRONGER INDIVIDUALS.]
Tajima grinned. "See? The system gets it!"
Beelzecluck shook its head, like a war veteran who had seen too much.
Suddenly, the bushes rustled.
Tajima and Beelzecluck froze.
A dark presence emerged.
Tajima's soul left his body.
The Kick-Rabbit had returned.
The small, fluffy creature locked eyes with him, its glowing red pupils burning with murderous intent.
Tajima locked eyes with it, frozen in horror.
A cold breeze swept through the field.
The tension skyrocketed.
Then—
The Kick-Rabbit launched itself at him, spinning mid-air.
Tajima screamed like a dying goat.
The first dropkick missed by a hair.
Tajima, still screaming, scrambled away on all fours. "WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT WAIT!!!"
The Kick-Rabbit landed, immediately flipping into another spinning kick.
Tajima dodged—purely by tripping over a rock and falling face-first into the dirt.
Beelzecluck slowly waddled behind the shack, refusing to be associated with this.
The Kick-Rabbit stomped the ground aggressively, preparing another lunge.
Tajima panicked. "H-HOLD ON! I COME IN PEACE!"
The Kick-Rabbit's ears twitched menacingly.
Tajima threw his arms into the air. "WAIT, I HAVE A BUSINESS PROPOSITION!"
The Kick-Rabbit paused.
Tajima took the opportunity to rapidly scoot backward, still seated on the ground like a pathetic crab. "L-Look, I get it. You're strong. Really strong. Like, horrifically overpowered for a small woodland creature kind of strong. And me? I am very weak. But that's where we can help each other!"
The Kick-Rabbit narrowed its eyes.
Tajima swallowed hard. "L-Like, imagine this! Instead of fighting against me, you could fight for me!"
The Kick-Rabbit tilted its head, considering.
Tajima instantly turned into a used car salesman.
"Think about it! I've got… um… job security! Yes! Great benefits! A highly flexible work environment! You can kick literally anyone you want! No rules! Unlimited PTO!"
The Kick-Rabbit squinted harder.
Tajima was desperate now. "A-And if you work for me, you'll get a cool title! Like, uh… 'The Ultimate Rabbit of Death'! O-Or, uh… 'The Supreme Kickinator'! O-Or, wait, no—"
He snapped his fingers. "Boots McViolence!"
The Kick-Rabbit glared.
"…Legstrong?"
The Kick-Rabbit flexed its tiny foot, as if preparing another devastating kick.
Tajima broke into a cold sweat. "W-Wait, okay! What about… Kick-chan?"
The Kick-Rabbit's eye twitched violently.
Tajima flinched. "HOLD ON, I CAN FIX THIS."
He took a deep breath and put on his most serious face. "How about… Raviria?"
The Kick-Rabbit froze.
Tajima held his breath.
The rabbit slowly nodded.
Beelzecluck fell over in shock.
The system dinged.
[MINION HAS BEEN OFFICIALLY NAMED: RAVIRIA.]
[LOYALTY INCREASED BY 10%.]
Tajima exhaled in relief. "Okay… we're good… we're good…"
He slowly wiped the sweat from his forehead. "Alright. Now that you're officially part of the Demon Army—"
Raviria immediately drop-kicked him into a tree.
Tajima collapsed instantly.
The system delivered its final insult.
[WELCOME TO LEADERSHIP. YOU'RE GONNA NEED THERAPY.]
Beelzecluck stared at the fallen Demon King.
Raviria stretched her legs, satisfied.
Tajima wheezed. "I… I hate… this world…"
To be continued…