The War of Beverages Begins
The Cosmic Dairy Crisis had barely settled when a new catastrophe shook the multiverse.
The Tea Cultivators of the Mystic Leaf Temple issued a divine decree:
"Milk shall not reign supreme! The Dao of Tea shall endure for eternity!"
The Coffee Gods scoffed in response.
"Foolish leaf-drinkers! You have lived too long in peace! The age of Caffeinated Supremacy has arrived!"
Thus began the Great Beverage War.
---
Back on Earth – The Family's Kitchen
Son-Wu San held his head in utter despair as he watched the universal news.
BREAKING NEWS:
The Coffee Pantheon has declared war on the Tea Cultivators!
The Hot Chocolate Faction remains neutral but is secretly stockpiling marshmallow reserves.
Juice Kingdoms have closed their borders, fearing an economic collapse.
Son-Wu San turned to his kids.
"...This is because of you two, isn't it?"
Xian Xue and Xian Long exchanged innocent glances.
"We just said we liked milk," Xian Xue muttered.
"And tea," Xian Long added.
Li-Yan Mei sipped her tea calmly.
"Well, competition is good for business."
"BUSINESS?!" Son-Wu San shouted. "THE UNIVERSE IS GOING TO WAR OVER TEA AND COFFEE!"
Li-Yan Mei raised an eyebrow.
"So?"
Son-Wu San almost fainted.
---
Meanwhile – The War Begins
On the Celestial Battlefield, two mighty armies gathered.
On one side, the Tea Cultivators, dressed in flowing green robes, wielding the Dao of Steeping.
On the other, the Coffee Gods, their armor dripping with espresso, their weapons forged from the finest dark roast.
The first attack was launched.
The Tea Cultivators unleashed the Divine Tea Mist, a fog of soothing aroma that lulled enemies into a state of enlightenment.
The Coffee Gods countered with Heavenly Espresso Shots, a high-speed caffeine blast that shattered the peace of meditation.
The battle escalated.
Herbal tea monks used gentle warmth to heal their comrades.
Dark roast berserkers went into a caffeine-fueled rage, smashing through entire formations.
The Green Tea Grandmaster shouted:
"Awaken, Tea Spirit! Brew to perfection!"
The Supreme Coffee Lord roared:
"FOR THE BEANS!"
The universe trembled.
---
Back on Earth – The Kids Have an Idea
Xian Xue tapped her chin.
"This war is kind of dumb."
Xian Long nodded. "Yeah. Why don't they just mix tea and coffee?"
Li-Yan Mei's eyes sparkled.
"Oh, that would be interesting."
Son-Wu San froze.
"...No. No, no, NO. Don't you dare!"
But it was too late.
Xian Xue and Xian Long declared to the universe:
"We want a new drink—TEA COFFEE FUSION!"
---
The Unthinkable Happens
The war stops instantly.
The Tea Cultivators and Coffee Gods turn, faces pale with horror.
"Tea… and coffee… together?"
A silence falls over the battlefield.
The universe holds its breath.
Then, the Hot Chocolate Faction sees an opportunity.
"THIS IS OUR CHANCE! SEIZE THE MARKET!"
A new war erupts.
The Great Beverage War evolves into the Café Cultivation Conflict.
Son-Wu San collapses into his chair.
"...I give up."
Li-Yan Mei takes a sip of her tea.
"Interesting. I think we should try it."
To be continued........oooooooo;)