Unwanted GirlFriend

It was a beautiful morning. The sun was shining, birds were chirping, and the crisp air carried the scent of blooming flowers. It was the kind of day that would normally make someone want to sit on a porch with a cup of coffee and bask in the calm serenity of life.But Orm had no time for serenity. Not today."This is ridiculous," she muttered, hauling a stack of books out of the house and dumping them onto the growing pile in the driveway. "Who knew someone could hoard so much useless junk?"She bent down and picked up a battered notebook from the stack. The corner of her mouth twitched as she read the title scrawled in black marker: Ling's Secrets—Do Not Open!"Oh, what's this?" Orm said to herself, a sly grin spreading across her face. She held the notebook up to the sunlight and tilted her head dramatically, pretending to ponder. "Should I open it? Would that make me a terrible person?" She looked around for an audience—alas, there was none. "Eh, who am I kidding? I'm already throwing her stuff out, so my villain arc is well underway."Just as she reached to flip the cover open, something shiny caught her eye. A flash of metal—flying straight toward her face."Wha—"The frying pan whooshed past her head, missing her by inches. It hit the ground with a loud clang that echoed across the driveway."LING!" Orm spun around, clutching the notebook like a shield. Her heart was still racing, but she did her best to look unfazed. "Are you trying to kill me? A frying pan? Really? What's next, a kitchen sink?"Ling stormed out of the house, still wearing Orm's frilly pink apron over her clothes, spatula in hand like a weapon of war. Her dark hair was pulled back into a messy bun, and her face was twisted into a scowl. "What the hell are you doing with my stuff? And don't you dare touch my notebook!" she yelled, jabbing the spatula in Orm's direction."Oh, good morning to you too," Orm said with a mock cheery smile. She pointed at the apron. "But before we get to your precious belongings, let's address the real issue here. Why are you wearing my kitchen apron?"Ling glanced down at herself, unbothered. "It's functional. I was cooking breakfast until someone"—she gestured dramatically at the piles of her belongings on the driveway—"decided to ruin my morning.""Functional? It's pink and covered in cartoon cats," Orm deadpanned. "It screams 'adopt me,' not 'master chef.'"Ling ignored her. "And while we're at it, why are you throwing my things out of the house like some sort of deranged garbage collector?""Simple," Orm replied, brushing a strand of hair out of her face. "Because you're my enemy, and enemies don't deserve shelf space."Ling's jaw dropped. "Enemy? What is this, a bad soap opera?"Orm shrugged. "If the shoe fits."Before Ling could respond, Orm pointed at her head. "Also, care to explain this?" She reached up and plucked a slimy, half-cooked omelet from her hair. "Why is there an omelet on my head? Were you trying to feed me by air delivery? Because it's not working."Ling smirked, leaning casually against the doorframe. "Oh, that? Well, I may have accidentally thrown it when I missed with the pan.""Accidentally?" Orm repeated, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "Right. And pigs accidentally fly.""Hey, it's not my fault your head got in the way," Ling said with a shrug. "Besides, that omelet was ruined already. I doubt even the raccoons would eat it now."That was the final straw. Orm hurled the soggy omelet straight at Ling's face. Ling dodged at the last second, but the omelet hit her shoulder with a wet splat. She stared at it, then slowly turned her furious gaze back to Orm."You are so dead."The next few moments were a blur of flying hands, loud shouting, and dramatic insults. Orm and Ling lunged at each other, wrestling like two feral cats in the middle of the driveway. Books toppled, clothes flew, and the battered frying pan somehow got caught between them like a trophy to be won."Let go!" Orm yelled, yanking the pan toward her."You let go!" Ling shot back, pulling it the other way. "This is your fault, you idiot!""My fault? You're the one throwing kitchenware at people like some kind of culinary assassin!""Stop acting like the victim! You started this!"They were so engrossed in their battle that they didn't notice the growing audience. Tina stood frozen in the doorway, her mouth open in shock as she took in the scene. Behind her, Sia appeared, pinching the bridge of her nose like she was already getting a headache."What the hell is going on out here?" Tina finally managed to shout.Neither Orm nor Ling responded. They were too busy pulling each other's hair and bickering at full volume."I said, WHAT IS GOING ON?" Tina repeated, louder this time.Sia stepped forward, clapping her hands sharply. "Okay, enough!" She marched over and grabbed Orm by the waist, pulling her back with an impressive amount of force. "Tina, grab Ling before she murders someone.""I'm trying!" Tina yelped as she wrapped her arms around Ling and tried to drag her away. "She's stronger than she looks!""Let go of me!" Ling shouted, kicking her legs. "I'm not done with her yet!""Like hell you're not!" Orm snapped, struggling against Sia's grip. "Put me down, Sia! I'm going to wipe that smug look off her face!""You'll wipe nothing if I dump you in the garbage where you belong!" Ling yelled back.The chaos continued for a few more minutes, with Tina and Sia doing their best to keep the combatants apart. At one point, Tina accidentally got elbowed in the stomach, while Sia narrowly avoided a kick to the shin."This is impossible!" Tina groaned. "I can't do this anymore, Sia. They're like wild animals.""You think I'm enjoying this?" Sia shot back, sweat dripping from her forehead as she tightened her grip on Orm. "I say we let them kill each other and call it a day."Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the four of them collapsed in a heap on the lawn, panting and covered in sweat. Orm and Ling glared at each other from opposite sides of the pile."Now," Sia said, her voice dangerously calm, "you two are going to clean up this mess before the landlord kicks us all out.""And by 'you two,' she means you," Tina added, pointing at Orm. "You're the one who started it.""Excuse me?" Orm protested, sitting up. "She threw a frying pan at me! And don't forget the omelet!""You threw the omelet back!" Ling shot back. "You escalated it!"Sia clapped her hands again, silencing them both. "Enough. Orm, you're picking up all the stuff you threw out. Ling, you're helping clean up the omelet mess. No arguments.""But—""No arguments," Sia repeated, giving them both a glare that could have frozen lava.Grumbling, Orm got to her feet and started gathering the scattered books and clothes. Ling reluctantly grabbed a sponge and began scrubbing the driveway where the omelet had splattered.The peace didn't last long. As soon as the cleaning was done, a new fight broke out over the bathroom."I'm going first," Orm declared, marching toward the door."No way!" Ling blocked her path, arms crossed. "I was here first.""You were cleaning the driveway. That doesn't count.""It does now.""Move, Ling.""Make me."They glared at each other for a moment before Orm sighed and stepped aside. "Fine. Be my guest."Ling smirked triumphantly and strutted toward the bathroom. Just as she reached for the doorknob, Orm lunged forward and yanked it open, slipping inside before Ling could react."Hey!" Ling banged on the door. "You tricked me!""Too slow," Orm's voice called from the other side.Ling groaned and banged her head against the door in frustration. Behind her, Tina and Sia sat on the sofa, watching the chaos with matching expressions of exhaustion."I can't take this anymore," Tina muttered, burying her face in her hands. "One day, this house is going to collapse under their nonsense.""Forget the house," Sia said. "At this rate, the landlord's going to throw all of us out."As the muffled sound of Orm and Ling's bickering continued in the background, the two girls exchanged a weary look. It was going to be a long day.