Certainly! Here's the revised Chapter
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Chapter 15: Lucas's Perspective
Lucas leaned against the stone railing of the palace balcony, watching the sky slowly shift into the soft colors of dusk. He'd been standing there for a while, replaying the events of the day in his head—his sparring match with Aria, the brief exchanges with Ryan, and, most of all, the growing distance he felt from his younger sister, Alice.
Sparring with Aria... Lucas thought, letting out a small breath. She was much stronger than he had anticipated. He had expected a challenge—after all, everyone had been talking about her potential—but facing her directly had been a different experience altogether.
She was fast, her sword infused with wind magic that made her strikes sharp and unpredictable. He had to stay on his toes to avoid her quick, agile attacks. Lucas had relied on his fire magic to create barriers and counterattacks, but he had quickly realized something: Aria wasn't holding back. Every strike of her sword carried real intent, and her control over wind magic was far better than he had assumed for someone her age.
Their match had ended in a draw, but Lucas knew it had been close. If we'd gone any longer... he thought, remembering the fierce look in her eyes. She wasn't holding back, and Lucas respected that. Aria was proud of her abilities, and it showed in every movement.
But Ryan... Lucas's mind drifted to the younger boy. Ryan was different. Quiet, reserved, but there was something about him that Lucas couldn't quite figure out. The way Ryan fought felt controlled—almost too controlled. Lucas had seen how Ryan deflected Eric's blows with ease, barely breaking a sweat, but he had also noticed that Ryan wasn't using his full strength.
He was holding back, Lucas thought, frowning. Why?
It frustrated Lucas. What was the point of sparring if one of them wasn't giving it their all? It felt like Ryan had been testing them, rather than participating in a true match. That kind of restraint usually came from people much older, those who had something to hide.
Lucas sighed, running a hand through his dark hair. Ryan had been polite, of course—always calm, always respectful—but Lucas couldn't shake the feeling that there was more to him than met the eye.
Or is he just being cautious? Lucas wondered. Ryan didn't seem like the kind of person to show off, but his control over mana was far beyond anyone else his age. Even with Eric's sharp reflexes and wind magic, Ryan had never appeared even slightly challenged. He had kept the match simple, never pushing himself.
Lucas turned his thoughts away from the Alestras and focused on someone much closer to home: his sister, Alice. He had been worried about her for a long time. It wasn't just that she hadn't sensed mana yet; it was the way she had become more withdrawn, more distant, as if she were building walls around herself that no one could break through.
He had seen it again today, during their time in the garden. While Aria and Ryan had tried to talk to her, Alice remained cold, her responses short and distant. Lucas had hoped she might open up a little, but she seemed more closed off than ever. Even when she laughed—just for a moment—it had disappeared almost immediately, like she regretted letting her guard down.
Lucas crossed his arms, leaning back against the railing. She's frustrated, he thought. And I don't blame her.
He remembered what it had been like when he first sensed mana. The rush of power, the excitement of feeling that energy inside him—it had been overwhelming but in the best possible way. He had trained hard, mastering his fire magic alongside his swordsmanship, and now people looked up to him as one of the kingdom's most promising young mages.
But Alice? She hadn't even sensed mana yet. At seven years old, she was already falling behind, and Lucas knew how much that must weigh on her. Growing up in a family where magic was everything, where even their younger brother, Eric, had already begun his training, Alice had to feel the pressure.
He clenched his fists, feeling a wave of helplessness. Why hasn't she sensed mana yet? Lucas had asked himself that question more times than he could count. They had tried everything—priests, bishops, even the Archbishop—and still, nothing had worked. Their parents were starting to talk about seeking help from the Pope, but even that felt like a distant hope.
She's probably feeling like she'll never catch up, Lucas thought, his chest tightening with frustration. He wanted to help her, but he didn't know how. No amount of training or encouragement could force her to sense mana, and the longer it took, the more isolated she seemed to become.
His mind drifted to Ryan and Aria again. They had tried to talk to Alice in the garden, to include her in the conversation, but it hadn't worked. Alice had kept her distance, and Lucas had felt that familiar pang of guilt. Maybe if I had done more... he thought. Maybe if I had been more supportive, if I had spent more time with her, she wouldn't feel so alone now.
He remembered that Ryan had mentioned helping Alice the day before. Lucas wasn't sure how serious he was, but it was clear that something had happened after their conversation. Alice had seemed more distant afterward, as if her thoughts were elsewhere.
Lucas sighed, pushing off the railing and heading back inside the palace. As he walked through the long corridors, his thoughts continued to circle around Alice. He couldn't shake the feeling that something had changed, something he couldn't quite put his finger on.
Maybe Ryan can help her in ways I can't, Lucas thought as he headed toward his room. I just hope he doesn't make things worse.
Lucas had always felt protective of Alice, but now, more than ever, he felt powerless. Watching her struggle was painful, and not knowing how to help her was worse. He trusted Ryan, but at the same time, he couldn't shake the feeling that something more was happening—something he didn't fully understand.
I'll keep an eye on her, Lucas decided. I need to make sure she's okay.
As the evening settled over the palace, Lucas lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling. His thoughts drifted once more to Aria and Ryan. They were talented—he couldn't deny that.
Ryan's strong, Lucas admitted to himself. Maybe stronger than me. He didn't like admitting that, but he wasn't blind to it either.
Next time, Lucas thought, his eyes narrowing slightly. I'll push him harder. No more holding back.
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