Tuesday is the day when SCHWULENBERATUNG BERLIN's Kuchus café provides consultations for foreign LGBT+ individuals seeking asylum in Germany.
I arrived at Kuchus café about ten minutes early and found several people who appeared to be gay or lesbian from the Middle East waiting at the door for the café to open. Some were accompanied by translators or lawyers, while others, like me, had come alone. Among them, a woman who looked Middle Eastern seemed particularly helpless.
Perhaps there are very few Chinese homosexuals seeking asylum here, or I might be the first. As soon as I walked in, I felt a staff member, a woman, looking at me with a strange and even suspicious gaze.
I quietly sat on a sofa in the corner, waiting for a staff member to come find me.
Before long, a male staff member, about 1.7 meters tall and wearing a round hat, approached me friendly yet slightly nervously, asking if I was LI ZHENG. He said he was the one who had contacted me via email (I'm sorry I forgot his name; let's call him Luca for now). He mentioned that the café was a bit crowded and suggested we talk outside. He also called over a volunteer lawyer to accompany us.
The three of us sat down at a round table outside the café. Luca began by explaining that they had never received a gay individual from China for asylum consultation before, so they had no experience handling cases of Chinese homosexuals seeking asylum.
He informed me that China is currently not considered a dangerous country for homosexuals, and they believed my chances of successfully seeking asylum in Germany might be relatively low. Moreover, the asylum process is arduous and lengthy.
Hearing this made me somewhat disappointed, but I still insisted on sharing my story.
I recounted an incident from the winter of 2012 when my phone was stolen in Beijing Dongdan Park, a well-known gathering place for gay men in Beijing. While a man was performing oral sex on me, he stole my iPhone from my pocket. Later, I found him in the park; there was a group of people who specialized in stealing from gay men who came to Dongdan Park. When I tried to retrieve my iPhone, I was attacked by his accomplices. Although I wasn't injured, I felt extremely scared and helpless at that moment.
I then went to the nearby Dongjiao Minxiang police station to report the theft. I told the police officer that my phone had been stolen in the park and that the group was still there, and I could lead them to catch them.
To my surprise, the young officer who attended to me was impatient and filled with discrimination. I realized I probably wasn't the first gay person to report this kind of case there.
The officer said, "Why do you guys (the homosexuals) go to that park? It's very chaotic; we can't manage your affairs. Just go home and wait for a call."
I felt deeply disappointed; this was the attitude of Beijing police towards local homosexuals.
After listening, Luca expressed his sympathy for my experience. He said he could prepare asylum documents for me, but he also hoped I would listen to the advice of the volunteer lawyer.
The lawyer then started speaking, noting that I could speak English and, if I had some savings, there were many ways to live in Germany. For instance, I could apply to study German in Germany; my proficiency in English should make it easier for me to find a job and stay in Germany. He advised that seeking asylum might be a difficult choice for me, and he did not recommend going that route.
He then inquired about my education and major. I told him I held a master's degree in China, specializing in medicinal botany. He took notes on everything.
Later, I mentioned that my travel visa would expire in a few days, and I showed them my application for a French Schengen visa. They were surprised to learn that I was using a French visa to seek asylum in Germany, as this might require following the Dublin Regulation, meaning I would be sent back to France to apply for asylum there. Therefore, my case became more complicated, and I needed to consider carefully what I planned to do next.
I then told them that it seemed I might not be suitable for seeking asylum in Europe, so I planned to return to China for now. I would come back to Europe once I had saved enough money. It seemed that studying abroad and other routes might be more suitable for me. They agreed with me.
I thanked Luca and the lawyer, shaking hands with them as I said goodbye.
On the way back, looking at the desolate streets and the drunken homeless people in the park, I felt I had lost my reason to stay in Berlin. I sent a WeChat message to Mr. Lin, a Taiwanese man I had met on Grindr, asking if I could stay at his place in Paris for a while. Mr. Lin replied that he had a backpacker staying with him and needed to rest for a while, so he declined my request.