The weekend passed in a blur. Apart from the rivers that I've been crying, I can't seem to remember much of anything else either. Sure Kyle tried to help as best as he could muster by simply giving me some time and space, that's about as much as I can actually recall.
As I'm sitting in the classroom, waiting for the small bunch of pre-schoolers to arrive, I retrieved a bottle of eye drops from my handbag and squirted a few drops into each eye. My peepers feel extremely dry, like they would crack and burst like clay underneath the 50degrees African sun.
As soon as the kiddies entered the Bunny-class, I plastered a fake smile upon my lips. "Aunty Geni, why are you so sad?" A tiny five year old girl with pigtails, Abigail Safras, asked with a cute pout adorning her features. "Have you been crying? My daddy always say that I need to stiffen up my upper lip," little Billy said proudly.
It sounds like his father might be listening to inappropriate things. Isn't that a phrase sung by one of the most notorious rappers known to mankind. Save to say that his rapping skills are out of this world but his tongue is as filthy as a rubbish bin, microscopically, because some trashcans are clean to the touch. "Aunty did you and Uncle K had a fight?" Jane Gonzalez asked me with sad eyes. She's the youngest of his forth brother. Being the fledgling in the family, Kyle grew up in a house full of brothers. There are seven Gonzalez brothers to be precise, from which Kyle is the only one who had yet to marry…, lucky me!
I informed her on a gentle note that it's complicated. Small eyes full of awe stared back at me. A curious hand stretched up into the air. "Yes, Monique," I acknowledged her with a little smile. "Aunty G, what does com-pli-tated mean?" I laugh a little at her cuteness. "Sweetie, complicated," I started by putting the emphasis on the second 'c' before concluding. "It means that something isn't as easy to understand." I walked over to the shelves at the back of the class and retrieved a 24-piece puzzle.
I emptied the contents on a small roundish play-table and asked the kids to join me. "If we try to put this puzzle together from inside out, it seems complicated because there are no outlines to help us; but if we start with the corners, complete the framework and work our way inwards you'd see that it's not as complicated as you may think." As I try to make them see what that huge 11-letter word actually means, I ended up building the puzzle within record time.
The rest of the day blew by quickly and I couldn't help but wonder if I'm making this Misha situation more complex then necessary. It should be a no-brainer seeing how I'm wearing Kyle's ring. Explaining the word complicated to the kiddies earlier gave me some closure on the matter at hand, I thought with a smile as I climbed into the passenger seat of my fiancé's car.
I leaned in closer and gave him a kiss on his lips. "You seem to be in a happy mood today," he said as he pulls away. I nod, "Yeah, the children asked me what the word complicated meant and I explained by using a puzzle." Kyle smiled warmheartedly at me. "Our kids would be honored to have you as their mother." I smiled shyly at him. Maybe if I give myself over to Kyle, I'll be able to get over Misha Anderson but unfortunately that scenario is easier said then done. He gave my knee a gentle squeeze before turning his attention towards the gearshift. Kyle put the vehicle into drive.
Once every other night, Kyle would enjoy a warm shower before me but this evening I feel like overlapping my comfort by joining him. Both my heart and mind seems to coexist and apparently my soul is right along with them; telling me the same thing: 'Don't do it!' Still I went against my better judgement. I dressed down to my birthday suit and stepped in underneath the hot drizzle.
He looked down at me with an arched brow, the question clearly readable on his features. I placed my palms against his chest, stretched out on my tippy toes and kissed him firmly on the lips. Kyle pushed me up against the steamed up tiles. I can feel how his body reacts to my touch. His erection twitches in anticipation against my inner thigh. I bite down on my bottom lip to withhold a moan from erupting, as a trail of sloppy kisses spiral downwards.
My fingers playfully pull at the hair in the nape of his neck. Sensually he glides the pads of his thumbs over my stomach. A shiver crossed my spine. In complete and utter pleasure I closed my eyes, but the structure of a different being embedded my senses in the most erotic manner. The hands that touch me suddenly aren't those of Kyle and the warm lips that fold around my areola… involuntarily I'm visualizing the mouth of another.
Blue eyes stares into the pit of my soul asking me how I could have forgotten him, but still I don't shy away from Kyle's prejudice touch. Even though I'm envisaging myself in the arms of another, which should be a depravity on its own, it's quite literally turning me on. Just as I thought that we'll cross that line, he stepped back. I opened my eyes and saw him looking apologetically down at me. "We shouldn't rush into something that you're clearly going to regret later on. I can wait until our wedding night, I mean it's only a few months away," Kyle said. Is he trying to convince me or himself? I wondered as I noticed his hard erection.
He followed my eyes with a sigh. "If you really feel like you're ready, I would oblige but you should be absolutely sure that you're not just doing it to get over a certain somebody." I look down at my feet in shame. "I'm sorry, you're absolutely right. I don't know what came over me," I lied as I bite down on my bottom lip. With a single step the space between me and Kyle vanished.
He caked my cheeks with his palms, forcing my eyes to look up at him. "You have nothing to apologize for, you hear me. You've been going through a rough patch and I understand that. Sure it's a little uncomfortable, I mean look at the state that I'm in; but I promise you love that I can wait. I've been waiting for two and a half years, so what are a few months more?" He smiled compassionately down at me and placed a kiss upon my nose. "While you finish up, I'll quickly handle this; so don't worry," Kyle said from over his shoulder as he left me standing alone in the shower. What have I ever done to deserve a man like him?