The Crown

As I walk down the spacious capital road, the sun is barely peeking over the horizon. This time of the day has never failed to amuse and disappoint me. The moon is hanging low at the estern side of the sky and the sun is rising gracefully as it should. Both of them are occupying each side of the sky, fighting for dominance but deep down inside both of them know that the sun will rise and the moon will disappear. Just like me. 

Just like how 'Lush' will fade into the night along with the moon now and the 'Royal crown prince, his highness' will rise just like the sun.

I have the most handsome fuck-me face on the entire continent. Or it is what my best friend Rosalia Red or the crown princess of the Red empire says. Well, maybe it was a bit too blunt of me but this is the truth. I am the most beautiful man and the most worthy monarch the crown of the Blade empire ever had. 

I, Lush Von Blade the next emperor of this great empire, and today is my twenty-first birthday or my marriage announcement with my childhood darlin, Lilian Blackwood, the daughter of one of the most high-ranking nobles in this empire. I am not marrying her because I want to. Because I have to. For the responsibility that comes with the crown. 

It's not like I am reluctant to accept my duties and the marriage, it's just…I feel like I am not suited for this job. I like to be free and careless just like how I am right now. Lilian is a noble-born and she is very pretty and intelligent, I feel like I am not good enough for us. I feel like I am too soft to be a ruler. And it's not just a feeling the way everyone in the palace treats me is evident that I am too vulnerable to be a supreme ruler.

Now the question is: why is the royal highness out on the streets at this hour of the day and over that all alone? Well, that's because I hate being in the palace, in front of hundreds and thousands of eyes. They stare at me with so much expectations and greed that it makes me sick. So, I get the time for myself and sneak out of the palace and go back to the palace before dawn. 

I reach the graveyard where the secret passageway to my bedroom is hidden. It is a secret spot so of course it's hidden. I push a gravestone aside at the corner of the yard, revealing the one-man passageway. I enter the passageway and murmur an ancient safe word. The stone comes back to its rightful place itself. I turn around and wind down the stone stairs, my steps firm and steady with a hint of reluctance. 

I scrunch up my nose as a rotten stench grazes my nostrils. Suppose I really need to tell Edward to build another passageway for me, this shit won't do anymore. I snap my fingers and a small ball of bright light ignites from the tip of my finger, illuminating the dark passageway. I don't actually need this torch to figure out my surroundings as I already know this path as well as the back of my hand. 

This passageway is old, worn, very dark, and narrow. It was made when I was fifteen. Edward bought some earth magic stone and combined it with his green magic then made it for me. It was when he was first appointed as my attendant after he thought he was capable enough. 

I reach the dead end of the passage within a few minutes. I recite that ancient spell again and the passageway opens up once more, revealing a small part of a large luxurious bedroom. It's well-furnished and it smells like rich wood and soft cotton. The bedroom is still except for the soft chirping of birds outside. The golden morning light is filtering into the room through the curtains, creating a soft environment. But this environment sometimes makes me feel like this is where I start and end. It makes my stomach flip for an unfathomable reason. 

 I step into the bedroom and close the gateway. I turn around and see Edward sitting on a wooden chair in a corner of the room opposite from me. I wince. 

"You are five minutes and two seconds late." He stands and crosses his arms over his chest, his face contoured with seriousness. 

I flash a smile, "Come on Edward." I toss off the cloak, its heavy fabric slipping down my white-blond hair and my face, "Just a little late. No big deal." 

"It is." He snips, "This is your fourth time in this week." 

I sigh, knowing that there is no way I can win an argument with him, "Fine, I am sorry. I will be careful next time." 

"This is the fourth time you are saying this too." Edward points out nonchalantly, "But no worries, it's the last time. Because Your Highness"- He stalks to me- "today is your twenty-first birthday and from now on, you are forbidden to leave this palace without any royal notice." 

"Isn't it the same?" I counter, "Do I have the privilege to get out of here anyway?" 

"Your Highness," Edward pushes his glasses up to the bridge of his nose, "you maybe don't know that the great emperor is aware of this every night's little trip of yours to the capital." 

"Seriously?" My eyes widen in surprise, "And you didn't tell me about this?"

"My bad." Edward apologies but his apology doesn't really sound like one. 

I stare at him for a bit before sighing exasperatedly and whipping around, "You are supposed to be my courtier." 

"I am a royal servant." Edward corrects. 

Edward Millers. Only two years older than me. We grew up together and studied together. In this whole palace, he is the only person who has the privilege to talk to me like this. I don't and he doesn't mind either. But sometimes his well-wishing method is quite the pain in my neck. 

"I am gonna take a nap," I state as I undo my shahs. 

"You can't." Edward retorts, "You have a dance class with Miss Ballerina in two hours and you are supposed to meet Lady Blackwood after lunch." 

"Cancel it." I wave, "I am not doing this. You already know that I don't need any more lessons anymore. I have learned from them and surpassed them. And about Lilian"-I heave a breath- "tell her to come to the party directly. Tell her that I am exhausted." 

Seeing Lilian's face reminds me that I am not supposed to be dreaming of a free life. My shoulders tense up and the muscles in my jaw tighten. Lilian is a good ally to me but as a bride… I don't know. We spent our childhood playing and messing around but for some reason, she always seems distant nowadays as if there is something on her mind and that something is not me. Well, it's always the same, I was never really on her mind. And now it's too tiring to even try. So I have given up and accepted my fate.

Edward pauses for a little as if contemplating his answer, "I will let the lady know. And I am well aware of your achievements, Your Highness." Edward nods, his tone still level-headed. I don't understand how can he deal with a troublemaker like me with so calmness. "Then do you also want to skip every class today?" 

Is he being good to me? Isn't he supposed to be strict with me? 

I raise my brow in surprise. And Edward seems to have read my subtle expression and smiles. "Today is your birthday. So I suppose that you can take a break once in a while." 

This man is truly handsome with his long black hair that he tends to hide with that bun but it doesn't seem to work all that much. And his eyes are so dark that I almost doubt that maybe even the light doesn't reflect on them. They truly are beautiful. Also, he is the only person aside from my father who doesn't need to crane his neck to talk to me. 

"Really?!" My eyes instantly light up, "I can really skip my classes today?" 

"Yes, Your Highness." Edward nods, "I wish you many many returns of the day. Live a long healthy life."

"Thank you!" I slip into my nightwear. 

"You don't need to thank me." Edward's stony expression softens a little, "I am your best friend after all. Right, Lush?" 

A pang of emotion hits my chest and my lips quiver, "Edward!" I jump at him, my hand splayed out. 

But he sidesteps and causes me to hit the floor instead, "You are big and heavy. How do you think, I am supposed to control my footing after you leap in for a hug?" 

I grunt in pain as I lay on the floor, "Switch back to your 'royal servant' mode. I can't take this 'best friend' mode anymore." 

"Okay." Edward's expression instantly turns all stony and stern again, "You Highness, it is disgraceful to lay on the ground like this. Please get up." 

And he is seriously doing this! 

I growl as I come back to my feet. "Get out now let me sleep."

"Yes, Your Highness, the Royal Crown Prince." He acknowledges, "Please sleep well. I will call you when the time comes. I may take my leave now." 

Edward leaves without turning back. The two doors shut behind him with a small thud. This man is incredibly talented. I don't understand why he is taking the pain-in-ass duty to raise a troublemaker like me. Maybe because he doesn't want to leave my side? Maybe. If so then I am the same. I want him by my side. I know it is a bit selfish of me but I can't help it. He is the only person except Rosalia who doesn't judge me for the way I am. 

I have so many faces that sometimes even I don't recognize myself. It makes me realize that I am slowly but steadily losing myself to my duties. Even so, they don't judge me. 

Edward is a Green magic user. Which is really rare in this continent. Green magic users are regarded almost as highly as Light magic users in this continent. He is of noble blood and destined for great achievement. This is the reason we were allowed to be friends. 

I climb on my bed and lie on there. This soft, luxurious bed helps very little to make me fall asleep nowadays. It takes a lot of hard work to fall asleep. But I am determined to sleep because I definitely don't want to show up at my birthday party with bags underneath my eyes. It will stain my beauty. 

***

"Your Royal Highness!" Edward bellows in my ear and I jump up.

 "What the f-" he gives me a look and I swallow down my curse, "f-fortune I have to have you here, Edward." I flash a strained smile.

"Please get up, Your Highness." Edward announces, "We need to get you dressed. The party starts in two hours."

And so does the evolution of my life.