The late afternoon sun cast long shadows over the city streets as Jared made his way home, a couple of grocery bags slung over his arms. He had just bought some essentials. milk, bread, and a few cans of beans, when the ground beneath him began to tremble. He looked around, confused, and noticed people running for cover, their faces a mix of terror and disbelief.
From around the corner, a thunderous roar filled the air. Jared squinted, trying to see what was causing the commotion, and was met with a truly bizarre sight. A giant kaiju, a mutated cockroach the size of a building, was stomping through the city. Its grotesque form was covered in a sickly green exoskeleton, and its many legs moved with disturbing precision. It had clearly declared itself as "CockMan," and it was not shy about announcing its intentions.
"I'm CockMan, the god of destruction!" the massive creature boomed, its voice echoing through the streets. "None can stop me! I will be the number one villain of Villain Co! Look upon my greatness and despair!"
With a mighty kick, CockMan sent a nearby building toppling over, its debris scattering through the streets below. The monster continued to rant, spewing a nonsensical monologue about how unbeatable and divine he was.
Jared shook his head, watching the chaos unfold with a mix of disbelief and curiosity. He had seen a lot since joining Villain Co, but this was something new. Still, he couldn't let such an opportunity slip by.
As CockMan continued its destructive rampage, Jared decided to make his move. He darted up the side of a nearby building with impressive speed, using his enhanced agility to quickly reach the monster's back. Standing there, he took a moment to appreciate the view of the city below, the scene of devastation sprawled out before him.
"It's quite a view up here, isn't it?" Jared called out, loud enough to be heard over the din of CockMan's rampage.
CockMan paused mid-roar, its many eyes blinking in surprise. It looked up and then around, its attention finally shifting to the unexpected presence on its back. "What? Who dares to—"
Before it could finish its sentence, CockMan leaped into the air, attempting to crush Jared with its massive body. Jared laughed, leaping off just as CockMan landed with a resounding crash in the town square. The impact shattered the pavement, causing the monster's back to buckle and snap.
As CockMan writhed on the ground, its exoskeleton cracked and broke apart, releasing a nauseating torrent of guts and ooze. The monster's insides spilled out, a grotesque mix of green slime, blackish ichor, and other unspeakable contents. The scene was horrific: chunks of intestines, stomach lining, and various unsavory organs oozed from the broken creature, adding to the already chaotic mess.
Jared landed lightly on CockMan's chest, positioning himself above the flailing kaiju. He smirked down at the writhing giant. "So, you thought you were going to be the number one villain, huh? Sorry to burst your bubble, but it looks like you're more of a 'number two' in the villain hierarchy."
CockMan tried to retort, but instead of words, it expelled a final, desperate volley of its own organs directly at Jared. The disgusting sludge hit him with a sickening splat, the warm ooze dripping down his body. Jared was momentarily covered in the vile substance, his expression a mix of shock and revulsion.
"Ugh! Fucking Gross!" Jared shouted, his face contorted in disgust. He didn't waste any time. Channeling his speed, he ran circles around the monster, creating a massive sonic boom that sent a powerful shockwave through the air. The blast was so intense it disintegrated CockMan's remains, reducing the once fearsome kaiju to nothing more than a dissipating cloud of debris and goo.
With the monster vanquished and the streets finally settling down, Jared looked down at himself, now drenched in the vile ooze. His face twisted in further disgust as he glanced around at the mess.
A short while later, Jared stood under a hot, powerful shower, the water cascading down and washing away the remnants of CockMan. The warmth of the water was soothing, and the rhythmic sound of it hitting the shower floor was calming. Jared took a deep breath, letting the tension and grime of the day's battle rinse off him.
As he scrubbed away the last of the disgusting sludge, he couldn't help but chuckle at the absurdity of the situation. The giant cockroach had been a challenge, but he had managed to handle it with his usual mix of speed and cunning. Now, it was time to relax and enjoy a well-deserved shower.
The last panel showed Jared standing under the steady stream of water, his expression one of contentment. The scene was peaceful, a stark contrast to the chaos of moments before. The day had been wild, but for now, Jared was simply enjoying the calm after the storm.