"How do I tell him it was not my intention to hurt him? How do I tell him I was in love with him?" I tried begging Brian to forgive me for thevmistake I had done, he did not Burge.
"Everyone warned me!" He had said.
"Everyone told me you were not a good woman. Everyone told me one day you would hurt me. I did not listen to them. Because do you know why?" His voice was very soft when he spoke.
"Because I loved you Val. I loved you like I've never loved anyone else. I've desired you for so long. I've wanted you to myself for a very long time Val. And when I had you, it was a dream come true. " He smiled, his lips laced with tears.
Brian took a deep sigh before looking at me.
"Val, you hurt me. " He told me. His words like a furnace were burning through me.
"You hurt me so much Val. " He wasn't blinking while saying these words.
"And for this mistake I made," he said.
"I'll punish myself. " I knew whatever he wanted to say was not good at all.
"No love." I tried to beg.
"We can work this out. I've realized my mistake my love. I'm so sorry. Believe me when I say I love you. " I cried, hoping he would have a change of heart.
"No Val. You don't. You got what you wanted. Fame. Money. Power! It's all you ever wanted. I'm leaving everything under your name." His words like a dagger pierced through my scorched hurt.
"And I'm leaving Val. This time I'm leaving you for good! " Like a bombshell he dropped it not having remorse of the effect his words could have on me.
Brian has never dared leave me. We had our misunderstandings in the past, but have managed to work through it all. We would too if he gave me another chance.
"No baby," I was already on my knees trying to beg him.
"Please don't say that. I'm sorry my love," I cried.
"Please forgive me." I wailed.
"No Val. I made a mistake of loving you. And this will be my punishment!" It's the last words I heard from him before he left leaving me on my knees.
He did not look back. My Brian did not turn his head to see his beloved Val on her knees. He just left!
I cried that night. I wallowed in agony and anguish. For days, I waited for him to show up. For days I prayed he could suddenly appear, but like a ghost Brian McDermott disappeared. Again for the second time, I lost him.
This time round his absence was felt. This time round he was no longer the insignificant nerd boy whose presence nor absence was of not importance, but a man whom I had fallen deeply in love with.
I tried looking for him everywhere. I tried searching for him in all his social media platforms. I tried tracking and tracing every movement he might have made since the last time I heard of him, but just like that, he had disappeared. Brian was nowhere to be found.
I gulped a bitter lump of saliva, as I looked down on my flat belly. A small smile creeped onto the corner of my lips. Despite him breaking up with me, I would never stop loving him. I would never forget about him like I did in junior school.
Brian McDermott not only gave me all his wealth, but also a very important piece of him. His child!
Another smile formed on my face, imagining how my baby would be. Would he have his father's striking appearance? Boy, I'll be doomed if he came out looking devilishly gorgeous like his father. I was afraid he might meet a version of me in his lifetime.
I chuckled, shoving the thoughts away from my mind.
I had promised myself to keep and nurture the pregnancy, despite the fact Brian had no idea I was pregnant with his child. That night I had come to reveal the news to him, but was met with an angry Brian. He had gone through my diary and found out about everything I had plotted against him. How I wanted to have his wealth, be in the limelight like him and moreover, have sex with him then dump him. Instead, I was the one who got dumped.
Despite achieving every single thing on my years resolutions list, I got left. I was all alone now. The limelight was no longer as entertaining as it was before. Back then, it was and him in the eyes of the media receiving praises and accolades as the best couple in the city.
However right now, I detested even the tiniest sight of paparazzi. They have been all over the place asking questions and jumping into conclusions about the sudden disappearance of Mr. McDermott Grey. Everywhere I went, I got ambushed by either the reporters or the media. It was very traumatizing.
It was not safe and healthy for my baby and I ,hence the reason I limited my movements. I rarely went out like I used. I rarely went shopping or dine out like the old days when I no longer worried about anything. It was like my life had been completely ripped out of me. I was becoming a different person with a new identity and personality. How sometimes I missed my old self!
"Miss, you have a call,"
My house manager informed. It was just the two of us in the big house.
"Who might that be?"
Since Brian left, I didn't have many visitors let alone incoming calls.
"It's your mother."
Lana said.
I thanked her before taking the phone from her.
"Mum,"
The moment I said that, tears began streaming down my eyes. My mother was my only pillar at that moment. I had no idea of how I could have managed to pull myself out of what had happened without her help.
"How are you my dear?"
Her voice soft and gentle, she asked.
"I'm doing well Ma. I just.."
She knew what I wanted to say. I told her that every time she called.
"I know you miss him."
She completed for me.
"I told you he'll come back. You hurt him so much dear, he just needs some time to think. He'll come back to you my dear. "
She always comforted me. Despite her words being very hopeful, I knew Brian McDermott very well. When he gave up something, not even even his own spirit could coerce him back to it.
After Brian and I broke up, I had narrated everything that transpired to my mother. I was glad she was very understanding. She asked about her grandchild, whom I told her he was doing well. I was referring to him because I hoped he could be like his father. If Brian ever failed to show up, atleast I would have something to remember him. Our son!