After standing still for a while, refreshing his memories, and grieving for a bit, Teyat saw the two gas canisters and the lighter his mother used for cooking.
Teyat walked towards the two gas canisters. He picked them up along with the lighter.
He took the canisters, placed them in the middle of the room, and opened the valves.
As soon as he opened them, he took the red lighter and walked outside.
His eyes showed a sense of abandonment. There was no emotion. Perhaps he appeared emotionless because of the relentless fatigue he had endured. He walked outside with cold, steady steps. By the time he stepped out, the sun was almost about to rise.
He had skipped over that night when lives were taken and given—a night that would go down in history as the "Bloody Night."
The sun's magnificent, warm light had met and enveloped him.
As a result, Teyat's eyes squinted as if he hadn't seen the sun in a long time.
And he looked at the sun. With his almost shut, violet-colored eyes, he stared directly at the sun, even though it burned his eyes.
He took a deep breath.
"Well, it would've been nice if I'd died too. My dear father, your attempt to kill me was left unfinished. Let me complete it."
He gave a small, indifferent smile.
Yes, he had come to terms with it. He had personally experienced this cruel and merciless tragedy.
Therefore, staying in the past was of no use.
But he owed this process of coming to terms to his mind.
"Really... what a tedious life and what a despicable person I am. Not long ago, I watched my mother get devoured by dogs before my eyes, I killed my brother with my own hands, and, well... I killed my father. And now, I'm neither sad nor distressed. Nor can I feel any other emotion. Well, after all, I'm human. We face all sorts of emotional abuse, don't we? Yes... anyway, they were going to die someday. There's nothing better than dying early, right? Mom, brother? Don't worry, I'll be joining you soon. That's a promise from your heartless and soulless Teyat. Oh, actually... I don't even know which emotion to feel anymore. Alright, Teyat, shut up and die."
He laughed.
He uttered the words that had gone through this emotional turmoil. In short, bipolar. Or who knows, Teyat? His selfishness, despised by people and some gods, was a gift he saw as salvation.
But in the end, he was human. He had lost the ones he loved. Behind this indifference lay a great sorrow.
In Teyat's view came his father's red car.
He walked toward the car with cautious steps, opened the trunk, and checked if there was any gasoline. He found a canister of gasoline.
Then he walked toward the woodshed adjacent to the house.
And he stared at the woodshed.
Memories surfaced once again.
•
Teyat's small face was covered in blood, his hands were full of cuts.
"Dad, I'm sorry, I won't steal money again, I promise. Please don't beat me, it hurts, ahh!"
His father was brutally beating Teyat at the door of the woodshed.
He was being savagely beaten for stealing money to buy medicine for his sick mother.
Yes, his selfishness was not limited to a few individuals.
"Do you think I care? How dare you steal my money, you useless thing! You know my money is more important than you, but you still steal for that whore! I'll kill you, you bastard!"
His sister was hiding inside, listening to Teyat's painful screams in fear.
Their father shouted in even greater rage.
"I'll make sure those two whores pay too!"
Teyat's face, filled with pain, suddenly turned to fear.
He could die, but he couldn't allow any harm to come to his loved ones.
Yes, this selfishness wasn't limited to a few individuals.
When his father suddenly stopped beating him and went to harm his mother and sister, Teyat quickly grabbed a large rock and hit his father in the head.
Blood started pouring from his father's head.
When he saw the blood, his father walked towards Teyat in fury.
Teyat was terrified, but his loved ones were in danger.
Teyat had already counted himself as dead.
But his father, all of a sudden, smiled maniacally and opened his wicked eyes wide.
"I liked this, little rat. I liked it, but a child who disrespects his father? How disgusting."
He suddenly grabbed Teyat's small body and dragged him toward the woodshed.
Teyat was shocked, panicked. 'Is he going to kill me in the shed?' he thought.
His father suddenly threw him into the woodshed.
Teyat fell among the logs; the shed was pitch black.
His father shouted.
"You'll serve your punishment here, you bastard!"
He suddenly slammed the door shut and locked it.
In the confined space, Teyat couldn't see anything in the darkness.
But Teyat had never been afraid of the dark since childhood. Because he used to seek refuge in the dark to escape from reality. It was as if the dark was a part of him, as if he felt safe and peaceful within it. But at the same time, he feared that his father would harm his mother and sister.
He pressed his ear to the door and started listening to what was happening.
What he heard was the car starting and driving away.
Teyat relaxed, took a deep breath, and clasped his hands together as if thanking God. Suddenly, he heard the sound of a door opening from outside.
Teyat panicked again and pressed his ear against the door.
But he only heard footsteps.
Then, he heard his sister calling for him quietly.
When Teyat heard his sister's voice, he answered softly.
"Hey, idiot, I'm here."
He giggled. Hearing Teyat's voice, his sister felt relieved, but being called an idiot dampened her joy.
She approached the door angrily.
"I was worried about you, and you're calling me an idiot? When you get out of there, I'm going to beat you up!"
Teyat smiled in the dark.
Hearing her voice eased his pain and fear.
"I'd even drink poison from your hand, what's a beating?"
His sister suddenly blushed.
"Y-you need to stop saying things like that, it's easily misunderstood, dumb brother."
Teyat chuckled even more.
"D-don't laugh, idiot! I'm leaving, hmph!"
"Fine, I'll stay here, in the dark, alone."
Teyat was using his greatest guilt-tripping tactic against his sister.
He heard her footsteps fading away.
"I don't care, let the monsters in the dark eat you!"
Teyat grinned slightly and, in a voice he had read in novels, said, "Don't worry, darling, I'm already the monster in the dark. Rest easy."
At that moment, he heard his sister giggle. Teyat relaxed and chuckled himself.
Teyat's eyes filled with tears.
"Screw you, you liar. You're just deceiving yourself, piling emotion upon emotion, deluding yourself."
After saying these painful words, he took a deep breath and grabbed the gasoline-soaked rope from the woodshed.
He placed one end of the rope inside the shed and soaked it in gasoline; he stretched the other end toward the car.
He soaked that end in gasoline as well and stretched it as far as possible.
Finally, he had distanced himself from the shed. He took the lighter from his pocket, placed it against the end of the rope, and lit it.
Teyat, as if nothing had happened, began walking toward the road leading to the cliff where he went every day, talking to himself, recounting his troubles, his day, and his life.
A short while later, there was a sudden explosion.
The shed, where everything he had experienced until now belonged, had been blown up by his own hands.
Teyat continued walking toward his goal, his freedom, without a care…