when the trust is broken,
your words and your sorries,
they mean nothing,
they lost their value,
the moment you broke my trust,
the same trust which i gave you more, than i gave it to myself,
or to any other person ,
the same trust,
which held our relation stronger,
now that the trust is broken,
there is no meaning to our relation.
how stupid of me,
to think we were meant to be,
while you never even wanted it to be me,
oh i was a fool,
to lie to my own parents,
just to love someone like you,
oh god,
forgive me for it,
now that I've understood my mistakes,
i am not going to repeat it ever again,
by giving you a second chance,
or any one else a first one.
i thought you would never break my trust,
but you did so,
and with trust,
you destroyed my world as well,
like a 2 in 1 offer,
i always like offers,
but this one led me to the death bed,
i thought i could build a future with you,
i already planed,
but damn,
it burned my heart to watch all my dreams lay on the worst place,
where did things went wrong?
but I know where,
which I hard to explain,
even in my poetries.
you lost me,
the second you disrespected me,
that one god damn word you said to me,
has never left my mind since then,
well cause I never expected to hear those from you,
oh darling,
how sweet and genuine you were,
like a gentleman in the world full of boys,
but by time,
you also showed me your real self,
and like truth is always bitter,
your true self has been haunting me since ive known about it,
and I can't help myself run from it,
cause my dear love,
you never knew,
how much I really loved you,
you will never understand,
and I know you will not even try to.
you tried,
you tried your best,
to make me feel jealous,
by posting other girls,
which says "my queen" or "pookie",
or complementing other girls,
then calling them your sister when I asked,
do you think I am a fool,
who will believe everything you say?,
no darling,
absolutely not,
none guy calls their sister "my love" or "my pookie"
you maybe tried to make me jealous,
but instead i lost interest instead,
it was never my plan,
but god said,
action speaks louder,
and your actions weren't good,
which is why god made me lose interest,
but it doesn't mean,
i could stop loving you,
my stupid heart,
it tolerated the disrespect you me too,
i hate it for what it did,
but you still ask me if i love you,
i ask god,
to make you realise how much i loved you,
maybe not today but definitely someday,
but till that ill be gone,
somewhere very far from you,
cause these days,
being close to you killed me more and more like if im hugging a statue filled with knives,
oh well,
no i have to accept the reality,
that you didn't ever cared about my feelings,
ah your love,
you would always leave me alone at my low times and then come later to me and say,
"I love you".
is that even love?
what type of love was it?
which can see their loved ones suffer alone,
that's not love,
love is when you support the other at their lowest,
you be with them,
you motivate them instead of telling them the things that they ruined,
you help them to get out of a hard phase,
you heal their broken pieces,
but in my case it was opposite,
he met a girl,
who was sweet, happy and loving,
he gave me pain, heartbreaks,
his those rude behaviour,
he made me feel like a second choice,
then he made that happy little girl,
a rude, heartless girl,
who no more fears a thing,
who has lost all her feelings,
the girl filled with pain,
not knowing how to end it,
she didn't wanted to live,
but she didn't wanted to die,
isn't it strange,
how fast that girl changed,
she stopped sleeping crying all night,
she stopped eating,
she lost interest in things that used to interest her the most,
she started hating love,
she started getting ill,
she couldn't forget what he said to her,
those voices in her head was recalling them all,
and stabbing her again and again,
she started hating love,
she blames herself for eveything,
while all she did was overlove,
god, did she really deserve it all?
she still dies literally every night,
while he is laughing with others.
my trust is broken,
so is my heart,
now I will never get back to you,
i am already very far from you but i will get more and more far from you,
not even my shadow will ever find you again,
the girl that you met who used to worship you,
and used to think you are everything,
she has died,
you killed her,
a many times actually.