Hostel
SHAH
(Typing…)
Can I ask you a question?
FIONA
Yes meow?
SHAH
What do you like about me?
I mean I'm not that good looking.
I'm not wearing branded things too.
FIONA
Pfffttt.. Oh, just that. I thought you were asking a serious question. Meow
Well, to me you look cool. First impression, you got me looking at you.
I like your style somehow. Meow.
NANA and KINA thought the same too. Meow.
SHAH
(Both of them too? Their level is too high for me. I'm outta their league.)
(FIONA alone already gave me a lot of insecurities.)
Do you think so?
All this time I have insecurities.
Thanks for telling me that.
FIONA
No sweat! meow.
Don't worry. A lot of people have insecurities. Hahaks
(͠≖ ͜ʖ͠≖)
We continue chatting and as times fly, next week is Semester Break for 3 months. FIONA and I planned to have dinner together along with some of our classmates.
We had dinner after class and talked about how we survived during the first semester. FIONA said she bought a firecracker and wanted to play it with me. We separated to take a bath, FIONA will borrow one of our girl classmates for a bath and we decided to meet at Children's Park around 8pm.
Suddenly I got a call from FIZ.
(Phone Ringing)
SHAH
(It's FIZ, What does he want now?)
Hello, FIZ what is it?
FIZ
SHAH, help me… I have a fever, I can't move…
SHAH
(This time? I already had plans with FIONA. But he looked fine at our dinner before…)
Is there anyone home? KIM or someone else?
FIZ
No, I'm alone. I don't know where the other's.
SHAH
O-ok, wait I'll come to you.
I use BOB motorcycle to fetch FIZ and take him to the nearest pharmacy.
(Phone Ringing)
FIONA
Hello, SHAH where are you?
I am already at the park with WAN.
SHAH
I'm at the pharmacy now, taking FIZ to buy some medication. He has a fever…
It'll take some time, maybe 15 minutes or so.
FIONA
Ok, I'll wait for you here… Be quick, bye.
SHAH
Ok, I will… Bye.
15 Minutes have passed…
(Phone ringing)
FIONA
Are you not done yet ?
SHAH
Y-yeah, done already.
I'm going there. I'll send FIZ back first.
FIONA
Ok.
After sending FIZ back, I quickly go to the park and see a very unsightly event. KIM is there…He's playing firecracker, the firecracker whom FIONA wants to play with me is in his hands. FIONA at the swing alone. She saw me and stood up but I just couldn't react or say anything. My heart breaks right there... I was speechless, my ears couldn't hear anything, my head felt hot, my hands were sweating and I got a cold shoulder... Felt like time stopped for a moment. I start the bike, and go straight to the hostel. Turned the phone off, I don't want to hear anything… I want peace, I want to sleep.
BOB
Look at our guy, what with your face? Something happened?
(I can't speak, but tears come out and I go straight to bed. I shared a room with ADYB.)
ADYB
WHAT'S WRONG?
SHAH
....
ADYB
SUITS YOURSELF!
(Continue playing guitar. It's a sad vibe, damn you ADYB.)
(Then I went to the AME room because it has a veranda.)
ZAM
What FIONA do this time…
AME
ZAM! Let him cool down first, you come downstairs.
ZAM
O-ok, SHAH if you need anything we are downstairs.
SHAH
Thanks…
(I just sat on the veranda alone and cried…)
This hurt so much, for the first in my life I felt heartbroken.
(1 hour passed, i'm collected and went downstairs. Tell all my friends what happened. They were furious and shocked. )
AME
It's ok buddy, you have us all here…
BOB
Yeahhh, forget about that bitch. She doesn't deserve my friend.
ZAM
You still have ADYB. They're the same though.
ADYB
FIONA IS BITCH!
(Continue playing guitar.)
SHAH
Thanks guys…
The next day is Semester Break. All of us are going back to our home. We all said goodbyes and separated. I turned the phone on and there's so many missed calls and texts from FINA. It hurts just by seeing her name displayed. We promised to make memories before Semester Break but she chose to be with KIM. She shouldn't have invited me in the first place.
Home
(Phone Ringing)
SHAH
(It's FIONA, She never stopped.)
What do you want? I'm not KIM, you mistaken?
FIONA
Why are you ignoring all my calls and texts?
I tried to reach you and even called BOB, he said harsh words to me.
Sorry about what happened last night, I didn't invite KIM.
You know I waited there until 11pm. I waited for you, SHAH.
SHAH
Why are you wasting time waiting for me, KIM is there. You guys had fun right?
Playing firecrackers together, OUR FIRECRACKERS.
Hmph, I've been suspecting you guys for a long time. Now god has shown me seeing KIM together with you in front of my eyes.
FIONA
Didn't I tell you I did not invite him, he came by himself.
Why won't you believe me?
SHAH
This is the second time, there will be no third time.
I want a breakup. I can't stand it anymore.
You go to KIM. That's what you always wanted right.
Now you and him can do anything you want.
BYE.
(FIONA didn't contact me after that until night came.)
(Phone Notification)
IZA
SHAH, you broke up with FIONA?
Why?
SHAH
Why don't you ask her, she's beside you right.
IZA
Whoa, don't be mad at me.
She's not talking much today.
She is just being alone all the time.
SHAH
Then wait till she speaks.
Hah, not talking much. She's busy texting with KIM.
IZA
Who's KIM?
SHAH
You are asking too many questions, Bye.
IZA
Wait, since you broke up with her.
Why don't you and me… together?
SHAH
What do you mean?
IZA
(Received MMS)
It's me.
SHAH
(What the hell, She's only wearing a bra.)
Why are you sending me this?
IZA
Am I good? Do I catch your interest?
SHAH
It's sexy, too revealing.
Do you always do this?
IZA
No, I only showed it to you.
SHAH
I don't understand.
IZA
Let's do it… with me..
Sex…
I want to do it with you.
SHAH
(What the hell!)
(Is she real? Or is she just playing.)
(But she did give me her photo, it's very tempting though.)
(This is the first time a girl asked me for sex. I wanted to try.)
In an instant I was so hyped, my sadness was gone instantly. Since I don't have anything with FIONA, I thought it was a good idea.
SHAH
Ok then, where will we meet?
IZA
I don't know. Do you know a good hotel?
I don't have experience.
SHAH
(Do I look like I have experience?)
I'll survey first and update you later.
IZA
Alright dear, hehe.
SHAH
(Whoa, what is this? A Break up is not so bad after all. I should buy a condom too.)
(Phone Notification)
FIONA
YOU WHAT!
ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?
SHE'S MY COUSIN, MY FUCKING COUSIN!
SHAH
(Fuckkkkkkkk!!!!, It's FINA, How did she know? Of course, It's her cousin, damn it. They are side by side. Fuckkkkkkkkk! Oh god what do I reply, what do I say damn it!)
FIONA
You have shown your true self eh. Funny, you dumped me and then this?
You want to have sex with my cousin, of all people. Do you forget you have me?
SHAH
I just tested the water with her, I knew it's not gonna work.
I'm just playing with her.
IZA
Dear, you said you want it. Why are you denying it now? Do you want it or not?
SHAH
(Fuck, they must be plotting together to trap me. Damn… this situation, there's no turning back. Whatever happens, gonna happen.)
I don't want it, I'm just playing with you before.
Even If I want, it's with FIONA, not you.
(The hell I said.)
FIONA
We are done, you know… We had nothing after this.
You're the one who said it, you're the one who wants a breakup.
SHAH
Yeahh, you must be happy right, should be planning what to do with KIM when the new semester starts.
Lots of things, no SHAH anymore.
FIONA
What do you know? I'm crying day and night.
And here you are, FLIRTING! We just had a breakup today.
It's enough SHAH. Bye.
SHAH
(Damn it, what did I do? I'm not thinking straight.)
IZA
Hello? Are you there?
SHAH
Why are you telling her?
IZA
I thought she wouldn't care because both of you had broke up. I just wanted to share with her my new boyfriend.
SHAH
You what? you crazy bitch you know. I didn't know you and didn't even meet you.
I only love FIONA, I love her.
(The way I try to fix things, I make it look even worse.)
IZA
Dear, why did you say that? You said you wanted sex with me right?
SHAH
(Fucking bitch, should block her number.)
Damn it… In one night. All the blame was turned on me.
God… What did I just do… FIONA… She must be hating me by now.
I'm sorry…
A week later I worked part time at a fabric retailer, and started working there. On some random day I met RIN.
RIN
SHAH? Are you working here?
SHAH
Eh, RIN! What a coincidence. Haha.
I'm in Semester Break, not doing anything so I work here.
RIN
Oh I see, I'm on Semester Break too.
I always come here to buy fabric for my cosplay project.
SHAH
I see… Are you okay with your boyfriend?
RIN
Yeahh, we are on good terms. Fighting sometimes is normal.
How about you?
SHAH
No, I've been single since day one at college. Haha
RIN
What about the anime girl?
SHAH
Well… she likes her senior, not my chance haha.
RIN
It's ok, you will find someone later.
SHAH
Haha. Yeah… hope so.
(We talked a bit more and after she paid I walked her out with goodbye.)
I spent all of Semester Break working while trying to forget FIONA, so I thought of switching courses. I submitted my proposal to switch to Graphic Design courses. It's too embarrassing to see FIONA after this, after what I do... There's no way we could be together again because it's her family related. My proposal was accepted and for the next semester I will be in a new environment and start fresh.
New Semester will start today and the lecturer will announce my courses switch in the class. I was called to the front and talked about my switching. I saw FIONA, she's not even looking at me. Yeah… to her I'm the grossest person ever. Then the lecturer walked me to Graphic Design class and introduced me. Besides me, there's another new student from the new batch.
Class
ERYN
Hei, SHAH
Why are you switching?
You left FIONA alone there.
SHAH
(She didn't know about our breakup.)
I like drawing, maybe Graphic Design is my path since I can't do medical.
FIONA's ok there I think... She has a lot of admirers.
ERYN
You don't get jealous? Hahah.
SHAH
Why would I? We're not together anymore.
She got KIM with him. They're lovebirds now.
ERYN
What! You guys breakup already?
KIM? He is a joke you know…
Anyway sorry, I didn't know.
ERYN then left. In Graphic Design courses ERYN is most popular among guys. I can see some seniors even have the hate look on me for the first impression because ERYN somehow closed with me as a newcomer.
After lunch and on the way back to class.
NANA
SHAH! Wait up.
SHAH
(NANA?)
Y-yeah what's up.
NANA
Your switching courses is shocking news to us, why?
SHAH
I think I can't go on, Medical not suit me. I like drawing though.
NANA
You're good at it I think, I can see you can answer most of the questions during class.
This is so sudden.
SHAH
(She's watching me all this time?)
DEEBAH
Something happened with FIONA? You guys have not talked yet this new semester.
We all notice it.
NANA
Y-yeah, is it?
SHAH
(Damn, my cover is blown.)
We have nothing anymore, please don't talk about her.
DEEBAH
I see that's why…
Let's go NANA. Class starts soon.
NANA
Alright, See you SHAH!
SHAH
Yeahhh… have fun
FIONA walked out of the library, I turned around and ignored her. ERYN was with her.
Hostel
Tonight DEEBAH and her housemate cook extra food and invite us to join them over.
BOB
Noiceee, free food!!!
DEEBAH
We are celebrating for the new semester, it's good to see you guys again.
SHAH, follow me Inside. I want to talk with you.
NIZA
Hei, don't rape him yet!
He's still heartbroken.
DEEBAH
Shut up! Like hell I'll tell you if I rape him. (Giggle)
SHAH
(What the hell with these girls.)
What is it?
DEEBAH close the door.
(The hell, is she really gonna rape me now?)
DEEBAH
You broke up with FIONA right, we all know KIM like her. Almost every day he will wait for her at the entrance.
SHAH
Yeah, KIMI likes her and she likes KIM too. I knew about it…
DEEBAH
How do you know? From what I see, FIONA always avoids him. There's a day FINA asks us to accompany her too. Where are you all this time… KIM always showed up, but you… Nowhere to be found. Always with your friend… If you won't prioritize her over your friends then don't confess to her in the first place.
SHAH
I'm shy around girls, I don't know… I feel awkward.
DEEBAH
Are you joking! Then why are you not scared now? I'm not a girl enough?
SHAH
I don't know…
DEEBAH
Damn it you, I'm pissed! Now I'm really gonna rape you.
SHAH
H-hei It's not what it means. Did you talk to FIONA today, how does she look?
DEEBAH
She looks okay I think. Do you miss her?
SHAH
Nope, just asking.
DEEBAH
Now you're single, you want a new girlfriend? I have a friend who's single too. I will give you her contact, text her and see if you guys can work together.
SHAH
(DEEBAH gave her friend contact, maybe I should move on.)
Later that night I tried to search for DEEBAH friend on facebook, her name is QUE. She's actually good looking, I thought she would be the same as DEEBAH.
(Texting)
Hi, are you QUE, DEEBAH friend?
QUE
Yeah it's me, who is this?
SHAH
I'm SHAH, DEEBAH college friend. She said to text you.
QUE
Oh, you're SHAH. DEEBAH did tell me about you.
SHAH
(She really told her about me. Am I being a topic for girls?)
We continued texting about things until she asked me a question that really smacks me to reality.
QUE
Do you have a car license?
SHAH
(That's it… I don't have a license. I don't have a bike or a car…)
I don't have it.
QUE
Oh. I see.
We ended our conversation there and it had me thinking. Why do I want a girlfriend now, I don't have anything to provide… No car or bike to take them out, even my allowance is not enough… Having a girlfriend right now is a joke. Breaking up with FIONA was the wise choice… She would suffer from how boring I am.