Operation Full Strike ( Ha-YAAAA!)
Today, I had to deliver a puny birthday cake at Miss Ladyworth's which
is practically the last place any sane person would EVER want to be. It's
just a little way down the street and is surrounded by a thick mass of
bushes and creepy trees that it's hard to imagine that there's a house
right in the middle. Only a strange secret blood-sucking witch could do
that. (Did I also tell you that I'm terribly scared of Miss Ladyworth and
that I seriously think she's a bad ass witch? Triple sssssssh!)
As soon as I rang the doorbell which was the head of something that
looked like a strangled rat ( Believe me you don't know how much I prayed
that it wasn't alive), She appeared in front of the door in a little red
dress that went well down to her badly chipped toes. She had a little
pointy hat on top and I'd have sworn that she probably hid an old
miserable flying broom behind her door. Miss Ladyworth's the creepiest
lady on earth. She never dresses in anything but black and red, barely
comes out or talks to people, lives in a strange house covered with leaves
and has the ugliest face ever. It's like a match stick drawing made by a 2-
year-old filled with moles and long shaggy hair. And guess what? I'm not
the only one that's terrified of her. Every kid in the neighborhood is.
Solving a crybaby case isn't really much of a big deal any more. Just yell
"Oh Miss Ladyworth! Here she comes!!" and that kid's as silent as death.
When I was twelve, Shayna's dared me to go trick or treating at Miss
Ladyworth's place or tell Dawn's big brother, Lewis that I liked him and
believe me, option B is a fate worst than death.
So, off to Miss Ladyworth's I went and luckily, I wasn't eaten or turned
into a squeaky mouse that day. Believe me when I say that I literally peed
on my pants when she opened the door. Yeah very embarrasing but very
true. However, she didn't do much. She just plopped a few chocolate strips
and an old snicker bar that looked half a century old. When I got home, I
dumped them in the bin and rushed to my bible which I haven't touched
since I got it which is like, the same age as me and prayed all day. When I
finished, I bathed myself in salt water and when I got back. I found Henry
chewing on them. Well, that's what you get when you have the dumbest
brother in the world who thinks that the garbage is a snack box. I wasn't
that worried anyway cause if Henry'd turned into a rat, the candy'd
certainly done it's job. Sometimes I like to think that witches were made
to eliminate ratty kids like Henry from the very face of earth.
Well, it also seemed like the witch's potion in candy was half a century
old and ineffective cause Henry's still human.
When Miss Ladyworth saw her cake, she squealed and grabbed it with her
old wrinkled hands. When I asked, she said it was for her grandson and it
got me seriously thinking…
How the hell does she have a grandson and how come she's still called
Miss Ladyworth? And, is her grandson cute? She doesn't even look like a
normal person with a normal house!! Well, all I know is that I'm glad I
survived the morning unscathed.
I got to school a bit late but 10 minutes before the next class, Shayna
jogged up to me with a terribly worried look etched on her face.
" Hey Summer!"
" Hi Shay what's up with the face?"
" It's June. She's mad at us"
" Mad at us? Why?"
" I don't know but I wouldn't say exactly mad. She's refused to talk to
anybody. She doesn't even want to hang out. When I asked, she said that
she just wants to be alone. Do you think she's angry over yesterday?"
" Why should she be? We didn't make it happen… Ok yeah we did but she
doesn't know right?" I said, going into full panic mode.
" June's a pretty smart girl. You think she'd figured out our dirty little
plan?" Shayna said. I shrugged
" Who knows? But let's keep that aside and hope that June's-let-me-bealone problem's all because of Max. Where's Dawn and Carlizza?"
" They're with Mrs Zoedvich"
" Why?"
"Discussing about some project stuff for Bio. Mrs Zoedvich wants to get a
few pairs together and make them watch over a group of eggs from a
lizard and note it's progress. So,what's up? any thing new?"
" I didn't have time to think but I'll think up something… Wait a sec what
did you just say?"
" Uhm… Mrs Zoedvich's working on a bio project?"
" No no after that"
" Uh… Mrs Zoedvich wants to get a few pairs together and make them
watch over a few eggs from a lizard?" I looked up thoughtfully, walking
around and twirling a pen around my fingers.
" I have an idea"
" What? Spill "
" June and Max are both Bio students right?"
" Yep"
" So we'll get them together!" Shayna looked at me, puzzled.
" How?"
" By making them a pair in the Biology project of course!" Shayna frowned,
giving me a twisted look.
" And how the hell are we supposed to do that?... Ah ha! We poison Mrs
Zoedvich and make them pair up with a gun?" Yeah. Weird much?
" No. Dawn and Carlizza geez" Shayna shrugged.
" My idea sounded way cooler"
" No" I patted her arm " No it didn't"
Mrs Zoedvich, our Norwegian Bio teacher makes everyone meet at the
extra large bio lab for practicals twice a week. Now, imagine a whole hall
filled with hunks, goofers, show-offs, queen bees, crazy cheerleaders,
dorks and nerds. You can't even begin to think of the chaos. Paper bombs
flew around the whole place and I got a few shot directly into my mouth
by the naughtiest goofers of Heatherville High. The hunks are the cute
cool and popular guys and are mostly the school's most adored QB, the
goofers are the lame naughty guys who think girls like them when they
don't and most times are a pain in the ass when they chose to be
mischievous. The show-offs are show-offs, the queen-bees are the cute
cool and popular girls who are as mean as a witch in a shoe box( e.g Cathy
Walker). The crazy cheerleaders are flirts in minis and the dorks and
nerds are as lame and as silly as they can be ( e.g Summer and her friends)
Now I'm sure you can probably visualize how terrorizing it all was. A boy
was whispering reproductive organs intentionally behind my ear, a
cheerleader and her friend babbled on and on about second base while a
goof shot spitballs at my face. In the midst of the whole chaos, I managed
to spot June standing against a metal railing beside the door. I slapped
her playfully on the shoulder, grinning.
" What's up Junny bunny! What's up with the face?" June scowled, looking
away.
" Come on Junny. Don't give me that look. What's wrong?"
" I don't know and if I do, I don't want to talk about it. And my name's not
Junny bunny. Stop calling me that." She grabbed her bag " Now if you'd
excuse me, I have something to do" With that, she sauntered off
haughtily. Ok so that was WAY over board. She didn't even give me time
to rememeber how to breathe!
" You see" Shayna said, startling me from behind " She's been acting that
way all day. It's totally sending me over the edge" I shrugged.
" Don't worry. She'll get over it real soon"
" So... What do you think? Aren't those guys just hawwwwt!" I eyed her
and shoved her aside playfully.
" Why the hell would you be thinking about boys at this crucial time of our
lives"
" I'm not the only one thinking" She nudged me " Look at that. Anderson's
staring at you" I looked and lowered my gaze to my bio textbook like it
held the answers to my terrible social life and sneaked a look at Shayna.
She giggled and leaned in.
" I think he likes you"
" He's just staring at me. There must be something snotty or slimy on my
face to make him stare at me like that" Shayna sighed, exasperated.
" Are you going to seriously or are you going to act weepy on me? Your lips
can't stay virgin forever"
" Uh...No they're not."
" Uh... Yes they are."
" Not!"
" Are!" She sighed and brushed back a strand of her hair " Ok, tell me
when last you've EVER kissed someone" She held up a finger we I sat up to
speak " And do NOT make up some weird story of being kissed by a boy in
ninth grade with sandy hair, white face and green eyes. People like that
only exist in twilight" I stared at her, wide-eyed.
" You've read it?"
" Triple, eew. Course not. What do ya have movies for? And don't try to
change the subject Summer"
" But that ninth grade story was real" Shayna scoffed and rolled her eyes
massively.
" So what? He kissed you and disappeared the very next day?"
" Well if you put it like tha..."
" There's nothing to put!" Shayna shrieked, pulling me up " Now, it's time
to make history and save your poor lips from a nunnery life"
" Shayna no..."
" Hi guys!" She screamed before we even got to them. A few looked up and
smiled while the rest basically ignored her. She nudged me and I glared at
her. " Come on Summer" She said, giving me a forced smile " Say hi!"
" Hi!" I said, giving her a killer look. Gosh Shayna I'm so going to kill you
after this.
" So, any of you cuties up for a date to the homecoming?"
" Nope"
" Taken"
" Sorry"
" Not my type" One said, glaring at me. I glared at him and rolled my eyes.
He wasn't even that cute.
" The feeling's mutual" I muttered and he glared even harder. It was so
embarrasing, I wanted to switch places with Mrs Zoedvich right there and
then despite how UNcool she was. I dragged shayna back to our seats, hot
red in embarrasment. I glared at her.
" What was all that? Is that how you want to find me a date? By totally
destroying what is left of my barely-there-but-STILL-dorky social life?"
" Come on. They're really cool. They're just acting all shy today."
" Yeah they sound jolly" I huffed angrily, reading my Bio text furiously.
" Summer"
" I'm trying to concentrate Shayna and you're N0T HELPING"
" Yeah about that... You're kinda reading upside down" She said, giggling
softly. yeah, I'm such a klutz. I managed a weak glare and tossed it aside.
" But seriously Summer you really need a date. How else do we find one if
you don't asked" I glared at Shayna's friends. They were laughing over
Courtney Showman's ass which they call a block of ice on a cold winter day
and looked round the whole room. Everyone else paled in comparison,
everyone.
" For goodness sake you've got to ask someone and stop being picky!
else..." She leaned in and whispered " Only the nerds will be left"
" Hmm..." I said, looking around 'thoughfully' " I could always ask Cameron"
Shayna looked at me like I'd grown two horns and fish feet.
" Are you KAY-RAY-ZEE? Please tell me you're hungry and need to eat the
entire cafeteria and NOT freak out" I laughed and Shayna heaved a huge
sigh of relief.
" But some of the nerds are cute" Shayna rolled her eyes.
" Only Dawn and Elan ARE cute. The rest are different shades of boring,
lame and MORE boring. Think Summer. Put your cool hot boy-you-shouldask-to-the-dance radar to good use"
" Yeah whatever. I could always do the my date's a band member thing"
" Yeah you do NOT wanna do that. June and I ARE the 'band members.
Unless you're totally lesbo and think I'm cute which I actually am" I rolled
my eyes and she went on " Ask someone! Isn't there someone you like...
APART from Lewis" Yeah that's my not-so-secret of the century. Lewis is
Dawn's EXTREMELY cute older brother and my crush since like FOREVER.
He's got a band that call themselves the rockin' beatles. I hang out at
ALL their gigs and have every single picture of the band's awesome
progress ( And it's SUPER hot lead singer). The disappointing fact of it all
is that he's got a girlfriend call Celia, a half-brained dim-wit and your
typical I'm-hot-so-turn-up-the-heat Cathy kinda girl. she doesn't even like
music and I've been to his every gig. Every single gig one. I've got a whole
bag full of things I've kept to remember him by everyday, from his
random stickers to a cookie he gave me in fifth grade (Yeah. Eww much?)
But that doesn't matter. He's still with mini-skirt Celia who thinks the
Atlantic is a shopping mall and the world revolves around beauty and
popularity.
"It's hopeless Summer! Forget him!! Think of someone else!!!" Ok I can't
believe that I'm totally gonna have to say this but where the heck's Miss
Zoedvich?
" Yeah we'll do that later. Now, back to June. Thought up anything yet?"
Shayna gave me a so-you-really-don't-know-how-stupid-you-sound-rightlook that totally bugs me than having to hear her babble all day about
finding a date and all.
" We've been thinking about finding a date for you. I'm not extraterrestrial!"
" What the heck does THAT even mean?" I asked. She shrugged.
" Just sounds cool that's all" I laughed and shook my head, thinking.
Shayna patted her hair through her reflection in a small spoon.
" Whatcha thinking?"
" Just brooding. I know Dawn and Carlizza are gonna be useful but I still
haven't figured out how we're going to break in and rig the whole thing"
Ok that's not entirely true cause I'd spent all the time staring at cute
boys who are oddly nerds when Shayna wasn't looking.
I looked at Shayna.
" Do you know where they are?"
" Miss Zoedvich's office"
" Oh yeah. Like where else could they possibly be? I..."
" Why do you ask? Do you want to help cause the office is out of bounds" I
didn't bother answering cause Shayna just figures it out in 5...4...3...
" Oh yeah!" She shrieked " You want to... Match you and Lewis on the
project?!" . I stared at her, totally weirded out, not even bothering to
remind her that Lewis's not even in our grade. I guess I'll just keep
counting till her brain glitch lets her think in 2...1...
" Ok! I get it now!!"
" Oh share this amazing fact with us wise one" I sang.
" You want to place June and Max on the same list so they get to hang out
for the entire week!!" I patted her on the shoulder and smiled.
" That wasn't so hard was it?"
"It wasn't. Good plan. I'm such a brainy!" I shrugged and don't even
bother to remind her who the master planner was. Shayna's brain works in
her own time. I dragged her behind me and suddenly she halted to a stop.
" Mrs Zoedvich had the door locked so that no one can come in"
" Then we need a distraction" I bit my lips and looked around. Distraction…
distraction… what could be the perfect distraction… Aha!
Miss Zoedvich's glassy- plastic skeleton! The creature's like a baby to
her. She literally sings to it everyday before class and calls it boo-boo
bear. ( Yeah I know like weird much?)
" Quick Shayna! Push the skeleton down."
" Me?" She looked at me wide-eyed " Why?"
" Just do it" Shakily, she pushed it down and the shattering noise sent Mrs
Zoedvich pushing out of the bio room like a psycho. When she got to the
dismembered skeleton, she let out an ear-splitting shriek.
" Oh my baby! Who did this to you?" She cried. Shayna stared at the open
doors and grinned toothily at me.
" Smart one. Go on in. I'll watch Mrs Zoedvich's baby and hopes that it
doesn't squacks" I laughed.
" Skeletons don't talk Shay"
" with the way this one's eyeing me, it looks like it might" I ran in and
closed the door quickly behind me. Dawn and carlizza stared up at me in
surprise.
" hey Summer. How'd you get in?"
" Sneaked. See guys I don't really have time to explain myself cause Mrs
Zoedvich could come in anytime. Now look, I have a great plan, a terrific
idea" Carlizza slammed her pen on the sign-up sheets and turned to give
me a full stare.
" Spill"
" You can pair June and Max together and then they can spend a whole
week together!"
" Yeah" Dawn said, nodding slowly. I grinned and stared at them
expectantly while Carlizza gave me a thumbs-up.
" Wonderful plan Sum. Golly gosh why the hell didn't we think about that?"
" Maybe I'm meant to do all the thinking" I gave a dramatic pause and
smiled at Dawn " And besides Dawn, NO ONE says golly gosh anymore I
mean, golly gosh much?" We laughed and just then Miss Zoedvich walked
in, dabbing her eyes with a little hanky. I dove under the table Dawn and
Carlizza were working at and held my finger to my lips.
" Mrs Zoedvich are you ok?" Dawn asked, concerned? Eww much?
" Face your jobs!" She shrieked at them, huddling off to her messy desk.
How much could we humans lose our humanity? Miss Zoedvich wouldn't
even pretend to be 'sad' if I died but could totally go weepy dolly all over
a thing that's supposed to be six feet under if it was a real skeleton not
that I think it is but what if it actually is...
Summer! Stop talking!!
" Well, we're nearly done..." Carlizza began. Miss Zoedvich yelled at her
and her lips snapped shut.
" Do NOT interrupt my moment of silence for my poor poor boo-boo bear"
I scoffed and made the universal barf sign... A little too loudly.
" What was that?" Miss Zoedvich said, spinning round to glare hard at
them. I tensed and held my lips tight.
" N...Nothing" Dawn spluttered " Just a piece of squeaky paper" Miss
Zoedvich gave them a doubtful look and turned to leave. Believe me I
didn't want to do it but I couldn't resist the thought of doing something
even worse. I placed my hands on my mouth and made a fart noise. Carlizza
gasped and Dawn glared hard at me. I held my lips shut to stop myself
from gagging from all the laughter. Miss Zoedvich glowered at them,
obviously disgusted. Carlizza gave her a weary smile and clutched her butt.
" Sorry for that. Had a big lunch" Miss Zoedvich blew at the air and
trotted off, muttering something about getting stuck up with human-like
baboons. I slipped out of my hiding place, laughing out hysterically. Dawn's
stares turned daggers.
" OMG Summer you're such an idiot. What was all that?"
" Kray-kray but actually kinda funny" Carlizza giggled and Dawn joined in...
well for a while.
" Just what is going in on there?" Miss Zoedvich screamed from her table.
We held our lips, desperate.
" Uh... It's just me" Dawn said " I talk to myself each time I... fart?" We
giggled and heard Miss Zoedvich sigh and mutter.
" God knows that if I get two more weirdos next time, I'm so quitting and
working in a pet grooming shop"
" Yeah. That's the reason why GOD's kept you here" I mumbled back "
Pets don't need to be groomed to GLOOM!" We laughed again and dawn
half pushed me out the door.
" You'll get us into detention Summer. Go on. We'll handle it"
" Yeah sure you will. Don't get GROOMY in there"
" It could never be more GROOMIER" Carlizza added, chuckling. I walked
back out and gave Shayna a thumbs-up, slipping in as quietly as I could
beside her.
" How'd it go?"
" What do I say? At least class's gonna be delayed by half an hour and I
don't know if I should be happy that we get thirty minutes to prepare for
iron lady or scared of hearing boys joke about the reproductive system"
Ok yeah... what?
" TMI Shay. I was asking about the plan. How'd go?"
" well, I know I'm cursed for life"
" Miss Zoedvich went all voodoo on you?" I asked, laughing.
" Sounded more like ' I despair oh dear boo-boo bear! Find your peace and
let your soul hunt thee who has done this iniquity!!'" She thundered,
laughing. I laughed along too and pushed her hair out of her eyes.
" Aww. So sweet. You sure you don't..." She batted her eyelashes at me
and smiled " Love me" I moved away and smirked.
" Yeah Shayna that's like the LAST time I'm ever doing that for you..."
When Mrs Zoedvich recovered enough- After placing a bounty of 250
dollars on the 'killer' of her baby- She waltzed back in in her usual Itotally-hate-my-job fashion and glared at us.
" Listen up you dim-wits and stop talking sex" We groaned and she went on
" Here's the list of your bratty names up the wall. you can waltzed
through it and probably try not to get your self killed or pregnant from
the project" Someone did the universal barf sign and I followed. Miss
Zoedvich didn't care. " You can let your hormone filled bodies out of my
class when the bell goes off while I mop in my office and re-think my life
choices" She strutted back into her office and everyone huddled around
the wall. The boys had a good time squashing some boobs and butts in the
crazy frenzy. Dawn, Shayna, Carlizza and I joined in from behind. As
expected, it was all Dawn and Elan, Carlizza and carlos, Shayna and Harry
and June and Max. We smiled at each other and winked while I strained to
see mine. I half fainted when I saw whom I was going to spend an entire
week NOT drooling over.
Cameron Williams!!!!
I double wiped my eyes and hoped against all hope that I'd suddenly
developed a terrible eye disease that makes my worst nightmares seem
real and stared at the list one more time. God no. If this was a dream God
I want to wake up, I prayed for the very first time in my dorky life. God I
ask for nothing else but mercy. I haven't done bad in weeks but I'm a
terrible liar I mean who isn't? Lord let this be a dream. Wake up Summer!
Wake up!! I closed my eyes, counted to ten, blew out a harsh gust of air,
opened my eyes, prayed that Cameron'd magically changed into Lewis
however irrational that may be and stared at my grim reality.
Cameron is my partner. The tattling weasel AKA universal barf sign
holder AKA you-totally-suck loser is my partner, for an entire week! Right
now, I'm totally pschyed for a full frog cream rubbing session and
anything other thing froggy in it with Franklin Mcwenskie than spending an
entire week with Cameron Williams. Give me frog cream or give me death!
" This…" I began, totally on full Summer freak out mode ( Believe me you
DON'T want to see me that way. Ever) "Can't be… happening!" I turned to
glare at Dawn and Carlizza.
" Please tell me this is all a crazy joke. Please tell me there's a Xavier
Mount or Josh Kaden under that name?" Dawn nodded no and my heart
dropped. Literally.
" How could you do this to me guys?"
" Miss Zoedvich finished it up Summer and kicked us out" Carlizza said.
I turned to take a full gaze at my enemy and soon-to-be mince meat and
caught him glaring at me and then at the list like he'd just won a lifetime
in hell to be fried extra-crispy. I glared at him wishing that I'd been lucky
enough to win that than a one week project with him. Cameron and I eyed
each other and rushed into her office.
" oh Miss Zoedvich you've got to find us another pair" I moaned " Or at
least find me a pair. You could pair him up with a house rat for all I care"
" Oh you won't!" Cameron said " Please, please, please Miss Zoedvich pair
me up with someone else I beg you." Miss Zoedvich yawned and glared at
the both of us.
" And why do you think I should give you different partners?"
" Cause we hate each other!!" We cried together. Cameron glared at me
and I glared at him" I can't stand him"
" That makes two of us" He growled.
" Oh is that so?"
" Yes" We said hopefully.
" And that makes you the perfect partners!" She said, grabbing her bag. I
was appalled.
" What? How?"
" Yeah. You can obviously see that we can't stand each other"
" Cause you won't be caught up on each other like hopeless romantics and
probably blame me when you have sex without a condom and get
pregnant..."
"Ok like I'm SO grossed out right now"
" Miss Zoedvich!" I moaned. Oh God not Cameron! I'd happily get run over
by a truck right now with a huge grin on my face than face Cameron
tommorow. Or ever!
" Good luck, partner" He drawled, saying the last word like it was a bitter
taste in his mouth. I smirked at him.
" Keep it. Cause you'll need it " He scowled at me and strutted off in that
casual nerdy fashion that makes. Me. Just. Want. To. SCREAM!!!
" Go to hell Cameron boring!" I screamed after him. Hell, I can't stand him
as much he can't stand me. Dawn jogged up to meet me, tugging me on the
arm.
" I'm really sorry Summer. I could have tried but I..."
" Don't beat yourself up about it Dawn. Nothing could be worse than this
so I guess that's all on my bad luck list"
" Yeah" Shayna said from behind " I do NOT envy you at all
" You shouldn't Shay. And you definitely shouldn't feel sorry for me Dawn.
You should feel sorry for Cameron cause he's totally gonna regret being
paired with me" I sighed and took in a deep breath " Anyway, we've got
June and Max together on the project so now, all we've got to do is watch
the love unfold!"
Yeah that's right Cameron will-RAT! I'm so NOT letting you ruin my plabs
but I could ruin your life. And I will. How in God's name am I supposed to
stand Cameron for one full week? Like my life could get any worse.