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Edward's POV:
My throat was burning from the delicious scent of freesia. The wild monster deep inside of me, the hunger that my body felt for that blood that smell too intoxicating, was demanding that I satisfied the natural craving of my system.
I watched Bella as she slept curled together into a tight ball on her bed, whimpering my name ever so often in her sleep.
The truth was hard to comprehend: I was in love with Bella but at the same time I fell in love with Anna. The both of them affected me greatly but in different ways.
Bella brought out the protective Netherlander in me that had to watch his prey not tolerating anything happing to her, always also watching out for the delicious blood I considered my own.
Bella was a sensitive, clumsy and naïve being with a strong stubborn streak. She needed a protector and I had been more then willing to fill that role since it gave me a reason to be close to her.
I saw her as an angle.
A prefect being.
A trusting lamp.
But that had all been before Anna came along.
Now when I looked at Bella I still saw the woman I loved but for the first time I could really see her. I didn't overlook her imperfections anymore or explained them away in her favour.
I faced who she really was.
Who we really had been as a couple.
Bella offered me her love willingly almost desperately wanting me to accept her feelings for me while I had to fight for every bit of attention from Anna.
Bella saw me as an angle, more beautiful then Adonis, what I deemed quite laughable to be honest. It wasn't how I viewed myself. While Anna saw right through me and my outer beauty didn't affect her for long, if ever.
Anna had the power of making me feel inferior, confused and make me doubt myself while I knew that I only needed to offer Bella a crooked smile to dazzle her and pull her into my ban.
I had to admit I rather like the challenge that Anna was, it made me feel deserving of the rare smiles she cast my way or the soft words she would offer me every once in a while when I managed not to make her angry for some reason. It gave me the impression like I had the right to feel her touch and receive her kiss.
I was earning Anna's affection what little she offered me and it filled me with pride, warmth, love and contentment when she did so.
I had always been amazed how Bella offered me all of her and wanted nothing from me in return but as much as it amazed me it also felt wrong since I was never able to give her all of myself.
My secrets, my fights, my dark side Bella romanticized all my flaws and imperfections, regarding me as some dark, troubled hero. She never wanted to see that I was just a normal person with issues which is why she never truly got to know me.
Bella would always say that if I gave her anything more than I already had done, it would throw us out of balance but what she never wanted to see was that I lived in that misbalance because she wouldn't give me the opportunity to feel deserving of her love.
It filled me with warm joy seeing Anna accept my gifts. The small, happy smiles that graced her lips while her eyes danced with elation when she liked the gift. She could never refuse flowers or a plate filled with her favourite exotic fruits
It brought me great joy seeing her enjoying and cherish the thoughts and the effort behind my gifts even when she didn't want to admit that to me and was giving me the cold shoulder at first.
The more Anna insisted on rejecting me the more I felt compelled to make her accept me.
Bella on the other hand was even behaving difficult when I bought her some nice flowers instead of picking them up somewhere in the forest.
Thinking of gifts it reminded me that Anna liked the scarf I had bought her at Burberry in the other time line. I noted to myself to obtain the scarf for her.
"…love…Edward."
Bella's soft sigh brought me out of my thoughts and my eyes focused on her slightly parted lips. Her scent was driving the monster insane and every time I kissed her my throat burned with the fires of hell.
As much as I enjoyed her warm, soft lips on mine and the electricity between us I could never let myself fall into the kiss. I was never able to truly enjoy kissing her.
Anna on the other hand: her scent was clean and she didn't smell like a human or food in any way but therefore her scent was driving the man inside me out of my mind. My teenage hormones were slaves to her arousing fragrance.
She was the only one I had ever shared a real kiss with the sheer thought of it made my body ache and burn with the longing and craving of tasting her sweet mouth again.
Memories and pictures of Anna and Bella were swirling in my mind. I loved them both and for the life of me couldn't decide which one meant more to me but eventually I would have to decide.
It's not like they would agree to share….. I shook my head disgusted with myself for even thinking such a repulsing thing.
Alice had a clear vision of me standing in front of an altar waiting for the one who would do me the great honour my of becoming my wife but Alice could never see who the bride was.
Suddenly, I noticed the world outside Bella's bedroom becoming brighter with the approaching morning. This meant for me that it was time to leave, once again having failed finding an answer to my predicament.
"Edward," Bella murmured once more.
The one little word was filled with protest while an uneasy pucker settled between her eyebrows as if she knew that I was leaving her.
"I'm sorry," I whispered apologising for not being able to stay, for not being able to give her want she wanted.
Apologising, for, once again, having come up empty, without any decision how things for the three of us would continue.
The question: which one I loved most tortured and taunted me as it did every second of every day.
My heart was still torn unable to decide and I asked myself how I would ever be able to make a choice between these two extraordinary women.
The only similarities that Anna and Bella had were that I couldn't hear both of their minds and I was enchanted by both their scents though in different ways. While Bella's scent taunted the blood craving monster in me presenting an almost irresistible forbidden temptation Anna's scent drove the man in me wild.
I could tame the monster and resist the call of the unique blood. I had been denying my true nature for long enough to be able to. That trained strength had also been what had allowed me to pull away from Bella every time she wanted to take things further though it hurt to do so and broke my heart to see the disappointment and rejection in her chocolate eyes.
Anna's blood was no temptation for me at least not in that way. Her scent pulled me in, in a way that was alien to me, not that I had never desired Bella physically because I had but because of my tight control and the constant reminder that I couldn't go too far with her or the monster would take over it wasn't even a possibility.
But Anna's scent was taunting my teenager hormones into a wild frenzy. The limits I had with Bella didn't exist with Anna and I often found myself at wits end, giving in into the desire to steal kisses from her lips and to touch her when she was asleep.
I knew that this was wrong but I just couldn't help myself.
I loved Bella in a soft, protective, tender kind of way with the natural lust a boy had for the girl he loved always lurking beneath the surface. My love for Bella was almost philosophical if I really thought about it.
While my love for Anna was like a force of nature, all consuming, powerful, passionate and hot blooded as the hum of maturity was always accompanying our encounters.
That was one of the countless things that differentiated Anna and Bella, with Bella I was still the seventeen years old boy while with Anna I could feel maturity taking the stage.
It was as if I adjusted to what each one of them needed me to be.
I sighed in frustration since I was not able to tell which one of the beautiful creatures I wanted nor did I know who I really wanted to be before I cast a last glance at Bella and returned home where Anna would wake in a few moments.
Anna's POV:
"How bad is it going to be?" I asked looking out of the window while the green scenery was flying by.
The rain drops were hitting Edward's silver Volvo while he was speeding down the street. I wondered briefly how he was able to see anything since the windscreen wipers weren't in use but shot that thought down quickly. He was a Vampire after all.
My left hand was resting on my left thigh and suddenly I felt Edward's cool hand covering mine before he curled his fingers around my hand and squeezed it in comfort.
"I'll be with you. You are not alone." His velvet voice murmured.
I sighed and whipped my head around to stare at his profile.
"Edward," I sighed again and he cranked his neck to look at me.
"I survived High School even with everyone thinking I was a basket case. I think I manage to be the school slut."
He looked completely stunned at me and needed a few tries before actual words left his mouth.
"What in the world…What are you talking about?"
I rolled my eyes.
"Am I guessing right that the entire town knows that I'm living with you?" I asked and turned around to look at Alice who was sitting in the back seat.
"Yes, they do," she nodded and suddenly Edward turned around to glare at his sister.
"Alice," he growled disapprovingly.
"I'm living in the house of my sister's," I spat that word with venom, "ex-boyfriend. What do you think that they think of that arrangement?"
Out of the concern of my eye I noticed Alice having her eyes glued to the road while Edward gazed with a pained, guilty and sympathetic expression at me.
"Come on for someone who is able to read minds you are selling yourself as pretty naïve." I shrugged my shoulders and turned around to look out of the windshield.
"Are you really that strong?" He asked after a while.
I bit the inside of my cheek while my stomach turned.
"I'm not," heaven knew that I wasn't, "but if I show any weakness they are going to eat me alive."
Edward squeezed my hand again.
"High School is a shark tank. But I refuse to be the yummy tuna." As flippantly as I was telling him those things I couldn't fool myself. I was freaking scared of entering that school again.
"I mean I survived it once. I'll make it a second time around."
Tell yourself that often enough and maybe you believe it. My subconscious scoffed at me.
"I wish I could do something to….."
"You can't change the fact that most human's feel the need to stick there nose into things that are none of their business."
Just as that sentence left my mouth the school came into view and also the orange beast of a truck. My jaw clenched tight and all the muscles in my body tensed with the fury and anger I felt for the family stealing witch.
"Anna," Alice soft voice brought me back to reality.
"Keep her away from me," I pushed out between my clenched teeth.
I heard Alice sighed and out of the corner of my eye I could see her nod her head while she wore an almost resigned expression on her face.
Edward parked the car in his usual spot before he exited it and opened the door of his precious Volvo first for Alice and then rounded the car to open my door, reaching his hand out to assist me.
Not that I needed his help but it was nice to be treated like a lady. Somewhere behind all the chaos I was still a girl.
"I'm here for you, Anna. No matter what," Edward whispered and squeezed my hand as he looked into my eyes and I could see his determination in his golden pools.
My lips puckered before I cranked my neck searching until I found the family stealing witch who was standing among her friends.
She stood with the back to me talking with Jessica. Rage filled me until my heart suddenly felt heavy and clenched painfully when I saw the looks I received from Angela, Ben and Mike.
It made me angry that she didn't even know what great people they really were nor did she ever make the effort to get to know them. She took it as a given that Angela, Ben and Mike were there to catch her.
She was wondering why Lauren rejected her and didn't want anything to do with her in New Moon, even went so far to voice her opinion about the family stealing witch.
The answer was as simple as it was true: the family stealing witch was not a good friend to them…..
"Anna?" Edward's voice brought me back to reality.
"She doesn't deserve them," I sighed and turned around to look at him.
He looked up before quickly turning his head away and a frown settled on his face.
Looking back I saw why, the family stealing witch looked at us. My grip on Edward's hand tightened as I took the pathetic expression that occupied her face in.
She looked close to tears because of the wrong that had been done to her.
She looked like she was the poor, innocent victim in a vicious game.
All my insides clenched tightly and my heart twisted in pain as my head started to pound. I was close to go over there and scratch her lying eyes out.
"Anna!" Edward whispered sharply before he cupped my face in his hands and forced me to look at him.
"Breath," he commanded softly while his golden pools shone intensely into mine.
I closed my eyes and tried to regain for composer. I had to remind myself to keep my cool as much as I hated her and wanted to rip her head off, the school parking lot that was filled with human students was not the place for such a happening.
When I opened my eyes again Edward offered me a small smile before it turned into a frown and guilt invaded his depths as he let his hand slid of my face.
"I just made the entire situation worse," he mumbled and looked around the lot.
I mimicked his movements and saw the pricing and judgemental looks of disgust, repulsion and disbelieve that were directed at us from the students that cared about the latest gossip. Unfortunately that was almost the entire school including the teachers.
I tried my best not to let them get to me but it was harder this time. I was already worn out and when they thought I was nuts in the other time line they pitied me and mainly avoided me. Many times when I looked at someone back then they would look away and ignore me, no one wanted anything to do with the crazy girl.
But I was not naïve enough to believe that I would be this lucky once again.
"We better go the bell is going to ring in a minute," Alice muttered from the location in front of the trunk of the car.
Edward and I looked at one another. I shrugged and made to move while I heard a heavy sigh leave his mouth before he fell into step with me.
Anger boiled in me the lesser distance between her and me became but I tried to distract myself by looking at those who stood openly staring at me and Edward as we walked close together over the lot.
The looks made me swallow hard and feel every uncomfortable. I hated her even more for that.
Briefly I looked up at him and he had his poker face on.
"You alright?" I asked curiously and slightly worried.
Edward's head jerked in my direction and he looked startled at me.
"It just makes me angry what they…"
"I know," I sighed and looked away.
Once we were in class nearly all classmates were gazing at us a few of them more obvious then others though that stopped immediately when Edward glared furiously into the space. But what really got to me was that even the English teacher graced me with a judgemental glance.
I gripped my pencil hard while I fought against the anger in me. I knew that life was not fair but this…
My throat tightened and I bit the inside of my cheek before I closed my eyes to take a deep breath. Edward's cool hand on my thigh caused me to rip my eyes back open and to jerk my head in his direction.
He offered me an encouraging smile and after a few seconds I smiled weakly back at him.
I was glad that he managed to get into as many of my classes as he could.
^12^12^
When I had to switch classes I tired my best to ignore everyone. Luckily the family stealing witch stood out of my way at least. I busied myself with school work and tried my hardest to tune out the whispers that were flying around behind my back.
"I'll go to the restroom," I told Edward as we were on our way to the cafeteria.
When I opened the door to the bathroom all conversations suddenly ceased and the girls that were standing around in little groups were looking at me. Some were giggling to another while some looked away from me after a second.
I sighed and went into a free stall. I was just done with my business when the door to the bathroom opened again and a nasal voice reached my ears; Lauren.
"Can you believe it…" she stopped abruptly for a few seconds and I could hear a hushed conversation.
"Have you seen them in the parking lot?" Lauren asked loudly.
"I mean really." She scoffed.
"Yeah, what was that about?" Jessica immediately piped up. Of course the both of them were attached at the hip.
"She is obviously desperate for attention. First she pinched her own sister's boyfriend and then the show in the parking lot in the morning. And oh the coincidence to make out with him exactly then when the lot was fully with people." Lauren laughed.
My entire body went hot and cold while my cheeks heated and I couldn't help burning in my eyes as I desperately gasped for air.
I had been once bullied in my world as well. I was way younger back then and helpless, powerless to defend myself. I hated that Lauren was able to make me feel that insignificant and worthless again.
That I once again was the strange little girl who had entered a new school where no one knew her and didn't want to.
Do you really want to let her win? My subconscious asked with a raised eyebrow.
I shook my head and swallowed the lump down that had build in my throat. I had fought, won and left my insecurities behind me back then.
I was not going to let that family stealing witch win.
I was not going go give her nor the others that power over me, never again. I had promised that to myself all those years ago.
I took a deep breath and suddenly my body was filled with anger. That was all her fault. If that family stealing witch wouldn't have entered my life I would not have to go through this crap.
My blood boiled and it felt good.
It felt good to be angry. Way better than to feel like a little damsel in distress because the others were bullying me for something I didn't do, for something that wasn't my fault.
Taking one last deep breath I opened the stall door and stepped out.
"Oh, Anna, I didn't know you where here," Lauren tried to look surprised when I looked directly at her but she was a horrible actress and the gleeful smile on her face gave her away as well.
"You knew exactly that I was here," I replied as I made my way to a free sink.
She only looked snooty at me while the other girls giggled.
"Say have you no shame…." She began bluntly but I cut her off.
"Since when are you the head cheerleader of the Bella Swan fan club?"
She stood opened mouthed before me.
"Didn't she let you and your friends," I looked briefly at Jessica before my gaze wandered back to Lauren, "fall like hot potatoes the second she came together with Edward?"
I shrugged my shoulders and finished washing my hands.
"She is our friend and ….." Jessica suddenly shot out.
"Oh really is she?" I retorted.
"Of course," Jessica vigorously nodded her head.
"That's right she is, at school where there is no Jacob Black or any other person from La Push. Tell me Jessica when was the last time she spend time with you outside of school?"
I suddenly briefly wondered if she indeed recently spent some time with Jessica and others and I just shoot myself in the foot but Jessica's imitation of a fish out of water told me that the family stealing witch didn't.
Jessica's eyes were ripped wide open and she took a step back from me as I grabbed a paper towel and to dry my hands. Some of other girls suddenly looked a little embarrassed while the rest of them screwed up their noses at me.
"You have no idea what a selfish and mean bitch she really is," with that I walked out of the bathroom.
My heart was beating wildly in my chest and I could barely believe that I had really told Lauren and Jessica off. In my world I would have never done something like that being this straight forward and aggressive.
Well done! My subconscious praised me looking with pride in her happily sparkling pools at me.
Letting out a breath I bobbed my head once as a warm feeling of accomplishment and victory spread in my chest.
Got to appreciate the small things. My subconscious murmured amused while I made my way to the cafeteria.
But once I entered the refectory my good mood was blown away instantly. The family stealing witch was hanging all over Edward.
Un-freaking–believable! My subconscious exclaimed throwing her hand in the air as she saw the picture in front of us.
The family stealing witch had tears running down her blotchy face while her trembling right hand gripped at Edward's sleeve. She was saying something that obviously made him very uncomfortable.
Edward looked equally uncomfortable as he seemed to be upset while she continued with her pathetic show, completely ignoring the fact that every single soul in the room was watching them with high interest.
Suddenly Edward's head snapped up and he looked at me. His eyes widened as he took me in. I was shaking with rage and my teeth were clenched so tight that they nearly cracked under the strain.
Seeing her playing the victim after everything she had done to me was more than I could take.
Slowly the witch also turned her head to look at me and when she saw me she pushed her trembling body into Edward seeking protection.
I wanted to throttle her.
I itched to get my hands around her neck and squeeze it.
Yeah, right as if I'm the bad one here!
My feet were moving before my mind even registered it. I was going to…..I had no idea what I was going to do to her once I reached the witch but I didn't get a chance to find that out either because a second after the witch pressed herself up against him Edward shook her off, rushing directly at me and caught me before I could reach her.
His hands held my shoulders in an iron grip.
"Let me go;" I growled lowly.
"You are only going to get yourself into trouble," he tried to reason with me.
We had a stare down but I knew I had already lost. This was not the place for this kind of thing no matter how much I wanted to throttle her.
"I hate her. I hate her so much," I whispered through my clenched teeth.
"I know," Edward sighed, turned me around and into him.
His arm was slung around my shoulder while he guided me out of the cafeteria.
"Edward….please," I could hear her chocked cry and my body tensed for a second at the sound of her teary and pathetic voice but Edward pushed me forward.
As we walked I was breathing deeply in and out trying to get myself back in control since I was seething. It was like a slap right into my face. After everything she had done to me she was placing herself into the role of the innocent party that had been wronged. I couldn't believe her nerve.
When a door was opened I was ripped out of my angry rant. Startled, looking up I saw a room filled with music instrument in front of me.
"This is the music room of the school," Edward confirmed my assumption as he led me inside.
"Wait here," he murmured while I braced my hands against the edge of the small stage that was located behind a old looking piano before I lifted my body up so I could sit down on the edge of the stage.
One crooked smile later, that did not reach his troubled pools, he was gone.
When the door swung shut after the quick Vampire I looked around. Violins, trumpets and flutes were neatly stocked in a cupboard on the west wall and a harp was standing opposite of the piano.
My arms were stretched out behind me and I braced my body on them as I closed my eyes and relished the silence. It occurred to me that I had no idea where exactly the music room was located in this school but I quickly shrugged it off.
I tried to think about anything but that witch before I would do something harsh and stupid.
When I heard the door to the room being opened I cranked my neck and saw Edward walk in with a violet paper purse in his right hand.
"What is this?" I asked him curiously.
"Your lunch," he chuckled at my expression.
"This does not look like it's out of the cafeteria."
"I went home. Esme fixed something for you." He replied as he ambled over to me.
"I could get used to that service," I quipped.
His usual crooked smile graced his face and this time it reached his golden pools though those were still looking troubled.
Alice's POV:
"…..Edward, please, I'm so sorry for everything," Bella chocked through her tears, "tell me how to fix this. I love you, please," she was pleading while she gripping the sleeve oh his shirt a little harder.
Edward….I was about to alert my brother about the fact that Anna would enter the cafeteria any moment but it was already too late.
The expressions on her face changed in lighting speed from shocked and surprised to pissed and seething.
"Edward, please, I need you. Don't leave me alone again," Bella was whimpering while she pressed herself closer to him after she noticed Anna but Edward broke free from her hold on him when he saw Anna storming over to us.
Bella wanted to go after him but I grabbed her arm and dragged her out of the cafeteria using the back exit that led to the east part of the school.
"Alice," she was struggling against my hold on her.
"Bella, can you tell me what is wrong with you?" Without a warning I swirled around when we were far enough away from curious ears and looked her dead in the eye.
She was a little startled by my movement and the sharp tone I was using with her.
"Alice, w-what?" She stammered.
"I told you not to do anything that would upset Anna." I hissed angrily.
A colossal show-down between the both of them among humans was the last thing we needed. I had specifically explained to Bella how important it was that she stayed away from both Edward and Anna. How she could be this reckless I couldn't understand.
"Are you on her side now too?" Bella slung her arms over her belly and bowed her head down, looking like a petulant child.
"I can't do more than to apologise," she exclaimed all of the sudden.
"I do feel guiltily and wrenched about what I have done to her but she won't even let me apologise to her."
"And you really wonder about that?" I asked her incredulously.
She looked as if I had just slapped her and took two steps away from me.
"Bella," I sighed resigned.
"I love him and I miss him and when I saw him I just couldn't hold back." Big tears were rushing down her cheeks once more as her face twisted up in pain.
"I know that and I feel sorry for you but Anna is hanging on by a thread….."
"Why does Edward have to play her babysitter?" Bella cried.
"Because she doesn't know anyone else respectively no one else knows her for who she really is. Right now Edward is the only one she fairly trusts because of what they have been through together and because he is the only one who also remembers the other time line." The words blurted out of me.
"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry for what I did to Anna but I just want Edward back and everything to be how it was supposed to be." She broke down crying.
I kneeled down besides her as she sat rolled up into a tiny ball on the cold floor of the hallway and took her shaking body into my embrace, rocking her to help her calm down.
"Is something wrong?" Mr. Banner asked while he was slowly making his way over to us.
"Bella isn't feeling well. It would be best if I got her home." I opened my eyes a little bit wider to look cuter and more convincing. To dazzle him Bella would say.
After a little more effort I finally got him to excuse Bella for the day.
It was the best course of action for the day since another confrontation between Bella and Anna would most like not end this harmless.