Anna's POV:
"Edward, calm down. It's alright. Rosalie and I are alright and the thing with Riley also went over well." I sighed while he was angrily pacing in front of me grumping under his breath. He had been doing so ever since he came back home and made sure I was OK.
Suddenly Edward stopped mid step and turned to look sharply at me.
"Do you have any idea how worried I was when Alice told me that your future disappeared?" The Vampire before me growled in frustration as he screwed his eyes shut, pinched the bridge of his nose with his forefinger and thumb while hard pants left his mouth.
Whoa! He is pissed! My subconscious assessed.
"I can imagine," he briefly glance at me shaking his head, "I'm upset about Jacob's sudden visit as well but we need them to defeat Victoria and there is still the Volturi to deal with if everything goes wrong."
"How can you stay so rational?" He huffed.
I shrugged.
I wanted to strangle someone, preferably Jacob or her, mainly her, sneaking my fingers around her thin, pale throat and to squeeze until she was not breathing anymore while banging her head against the ground with all the strength that I possessed. I could have climbed up the walls or pulled a Terminator, shooting and blowing up everything around me until nothing was left anymore ….
It kind of scared and concerned me what brutal scenarios my mind had come up with over the past few weeks whenever I was angry and just wanted to … destroy something or …. punch someone.
But as good as that sounded, looked like and felt to picture that in my head, in the heat of blind, white hot rage, reality always had a way to slap me ice cold in the face, disapprovingly waving it's finger at me.
Really what could I do? Stab her, strangle her, shoot her and then what …. the witch would be dead and I would be a murderer ….. That was just frustrating. I was overtaken by an all consuming frustration that was eating at me.
All this rage, hurt and anger I felt was bottling up inside of me. I had no outlet for those feelings. I was feeling like I was going to burst at any moment but since Victoria was lurking around in the corners and the Volturi were to show up…
I could have killed someone but the cruel reality was that I was helpless, powerless, had to almost unconsciously bid my time until Victoria and the Volturi were dealt with and then ….. came the big question.
What would I do then?
Where would I go from where I was at the moment?
In the end all my anger always dissolved into the frustrating feeling of lack of power over my own unknown future.
"I…. honestly ….. I just want all of this to be done and over with. I could go on about how stupid and blind Jacob is all day but what good would that do. In my book there is all hope lost with him so…." I shrugged helplessly.
And to be honest I was too tired, too drained ….. emotionally entirely exhausted. I just didn't have it in me anymore to rampage out of fury which seemed to be quite short lived these days.
Idly calm and my logic was all I had left to hold on to. It was the only thing that kept me grounded and from losing it.
That's not true! My subconscious bristled holding a huge poster of Edward over her head, looking with narrowed eyes and pursed lips at me, daring me to deny.
I sighed not commenting her outburst at all.
As far as Jacob's behaviour was concerned words failed me. How he was able to twist everything so that it fit into his little world that he created in his head was beyond me. They do say that love is making one blind but this was beggaring description.
Already in the books his behaviour had me shaking my head in disbelieve but the books had nothing on reality. Then again she was depending on the pup ever since Edward ended things for good with her, so in a way I could understand where he got the idea from that there was more between them.
I was pulled out of my thoughts when Edward huffed and sat down beside me on the couch in Esme's studio. I loved to sit on the big cream coloured couch while the rain whipped against the huge glass wall that allowed a breathtaking view of the forest and the mountains in the distance.
"I'm sorry for losing my temper like this." He apologised.
"You were just behaving like a typical guy," I waved him off and he frowned.
"But I've got to admit I was floored by Rosalie's angry rant after Jacob and Sam went home and here I always thought I had an impressive vocabulary of foul words. Not that I used them often," I pouted playfully at him while he looked incredulously at me before he barked a laugh and shook his head.
"You are…..," he laughed still shaking his head.
I just shrugged smiling back at him.
(*.*)
My head snapped around when I heard a growl rumble behind me. Rosalie wore a sinister expression on her face and her arms were tightly folded across her chest while Emmett had his arm wrapped around her as the both of them sat behind Edward and me in the media room.
When my head turned around I was met with Edward's unhappy expression while he was looking at Jasper.
"Am I missing something?" I looked curiously between the both of them.
"Carlisle and Esme just decided that we should talk about Irina." Edward told me after he turned around to face me.
"Oh," I bobbed my head and we all stood up to make our way into the dinning room to sit down around the antique table.
Edward and Carlisle sat at the opposite sides of the table with Esme to Carlisle's right and me to Edward while Alice sat between Esme and Jasper and Emmett was located on the other side between Rosalie and me.
"I have just called Eleazar and he confirmed that Irina is indeed seeking revenge." Carlisle began and Rosalie huffed angrily, glaring at the polished surface of the table.
"When is she even going to be here?" Emmett asked holding Rosalie close to him as she glared at nothing in particular.
Inhaling I mulled the events of Breaking Dawn over in my head.
"About… three months after graduation … more or less."
"At least that gives us some time." Esme murmured.
"To do what exactly?" Rosalie raised an eyebrow at Esme who in search for help looked up at her beloved.
"Do they even know what is going on here?" I asked curiously.
"No, we thought it would be better the less people knew about what had happened." Carlisle shook his head.
"Maybe we should tell them," Jasper suggested, "Kate and Tanya would do anything to keep their sister safe."
"I was thinking along those lines as well," Carlisle nodded at Jasper.
"Esme and I would go up to Alaska after we took care of Victoria and her army to discuss this face to face because I don't think that this is something that should be done over the phone."
Rosalie shook her head angrily but said nothing as everyone else nodded. Just as Carlisle was about to dismiss the meeting I saw out of the corner of my eye how Edward winced and a pained mask overtook his expression.
"What about his Ex?" Rosalie hissed pointing at Edward with her chin. "Aren't you worried at all? She has become quite a liability to us. Now that Edward dumped her who knows what that selfish bitch will do," she glared sternly at both Edward and Carlisle.
Edward's lips were pressed into a thin line while he stared down at his hands in his lap whilst Carlisle sighed.
"We can't kill her that easily anymore Rosalie. Those mutts would immediately point their fingers at us." Jasper mussed.
Well, he goes flat out, doesn't he? My subconscious giggled stunned and without any humour while she looked unsure at me.
"You should have listened to me and we should have never have allowed her into our lives." Rosalie angrily shook her head.
"Bella won't tell anyone!" Alice piped up.
"How do you know that?" Rosalie barked icily.
"Because I know her," Alice stood up leaning forward over the table, inching closer to her sister.
"Oh yeah," Rosalie scoffed, "and we've seen just how good you known her." She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at Alice who winced and slumped back into her chair.
"Be that as it may. Jasper is right we can't harm her without drawing unnecessary attention," Carlisle looked sternly at both Rosalie and Jasper obviously not liking the direction the conversation took at all.
"There are after all not only the Werewolves to consider but also Bella's father who is the Chief of police." He added looking at his son while Edward drove his hand through his hair.
"So what now? We just wait until the Volturi comes down on us?" Rosalie huffed.
Edward exhaled heavily and pinched the bridge of his nose.
"We will cross that bridge when we come to it Rosalie for now there is not much we can do." Carlisle muttered gravely.
"Unfortunately we need those mutts to help with Victoria and her army." Jasper drawled.
Emmett straightened in his seat and opened his mouth to say something but thought better of it.
"I would say all we can do right now is to make Sam and the others aware of the situation. It is also in their interest to keep humans from knowing about Vampires since the Vampire road leads straight to Werewolf boulevard." I shrugged throwing in my two scents.
"Alice will be able to see if something happens." Esme nodded mainly to herself because we all knew that the family stealing witch knew exactly how to out smart Alice's ability.
She could cause a lot of damage if she wanted to. Having the wolves, well at least one wolf completely on her side she could leave Alice entirely blind whenever she wanted to.
Silence settled among us as we all looked grim
"Great! Just great!" Rosalie suddenly barked before she rushed out of the front door while Emmett sighed and went after his upset wife.
(*.*)
"Soooo how is my history paper?" I asked spinning around on my office chair while Jasper took his sweet time to read essay.
Why does he even want to read that essay? My subconscious raised an eyebrow at me and I shrugged clueless at her.
"I had been absent from school what … three weeks back then … I can't believe that this stupid history teacher took months until he noticed that I needed to submit this essay for me to be able to graduate." I grumped. "Noooo, he remembers just a few days before the finals."
Putting my feet firmly on the ground my chair stopped spinning unfortunately my head didn't. I had to close my eyes and wait a few moments until my room stopped turning.
Gazing up at Jasper he just looked up from my history paper and narrowed his eyes at me.
"What?" I pressed.
"Well this is good," he bobbed his head slowly.
"Buuut…." I looked expectantly at him.
"The content is good… well for a high school essay that is." He smirked at me.
Grabbing a pen from my desk I threw it at him. He laughed and caught it without any trouble what made me pout, roll my eyes and glare at him.
"You are so easy to tease." He chuckled putting the essay on my desk.
I gave him the stinky eye what made him laugh harder and I shook my head at him.
"Jasper, don't tease her," Esme chided him playfully while she was carrying my clothes.
"Esme you didn't need to inconvenience yourself. I can at least do my own laundry." I jumped off my chair and went to take my shirts out of her hands. I had just yesterday hung them out to dry.
"Don't be silly sweetheart that's not inconvenience at all." She shook her head at me.
I smiled gratefully at her and put my clothes into my closet.
"Is there anything else I can help you with?" Jasper asked.
"Hey you are the one who wanted to read that essay but thanks for asking. I just e-mail it and then I will take another look at the math exam." I answered and he nodded his head offering me a small smile before he left my room.
Sighing I went back to my desk and was assaulted with memories of the past. I used to sit on my desk in my old life until late into the night when exams knocked on my door.
A smile crept on my face when I thought back on the proud look in my mom's eyes whenever I brought a good grade back home but it soon vanished as sadness and loss filled my heart and I had to fight hard to keep the tears back that started to pull in my eyes as my throat tightened.
Shaking my head I took a deep breathe forcing myself to concentrate on my task in front of me and pushing those painful memories into the back of my mind.
"Come in." I called when someone knocked on my door a while later.
"Are you busy?" His velvet voice asked me while I was going over the solutions for the final exams.
"Just taking a look at calculations again."
"Haven't you memorised that already?" He asked when he walked up to me.
"Yeah, but I don't have anything better to do. So….." I shrugged.
"Actually…" he stretched the word out as he grabbed the back of my office chair turning me to face him.
Edward kneeled down in front of me and braced his arms on my lap, looking up at me from under his lashes.
Oh that look is screaming that he wants something. My subconscious raised a challenging eyebrow at him.
"I think you….. we are in desperate need to get out of here."
I narrowed my eyes at him.
"What are you up to?"
"A surprise," he smiled mysteriously, "You won't regret it."
Sucking in a deep breathe I looked at his with excitement sparkling golden pools and then at my notes before my eyes focused back on him.
Calculations or a mysterious surprise? My subconscious tapped her forefinger thoughtfully against her chin. Duh, what a tough choice!
"Alright, I'm always ready for mischief." I bobbed my head.
He beamed at me and pulled me out of the chair as he stood up.
"How should I dress?"
"We're going into town," Edward said before he zipped out of my room.
Hmm….what could he be up to? My subconscious mused cocking her head to the side.
Having changed my clothes I made my way downstairs where Edward was waiting for me.
"Alice and Jasper are already in the car," he informed me.
Alice? My subconscious looked up from her fashion magazine in surprise.
Not that Alice had ever been anything else but polite and kind to me though she had been avoiding me as much as she could for a few days.
"OK," I nodded, not quite sure what to make out of the situation.
Alice was sitting behind the driver's seat and looking out of the window not acknowledging Edward's and mine arrival at the car while Jasper smiled apologetically at the both of us.
"Do you at least going to tell me where we are going?" I asked Edward when we hit the highway.
"Hoquiam."
"Where you first met the wolves."
Edward's head instantly snapped in my direction his eyes narrowed until a second later he shook his head.
"How much more do you exactly know about us?"
"Err….." I sighed heavily. "Honestly if you ask me like that I have no idea … I know about your pasts, the future," I thought hard. "I don't think I have anything to surprise you with anymore."
Except the knowledge about the Volturi but that better stays under the rug. My subconscious grimaced.
"Would you bet on it?" Jasper asked from the backseat.
Opening my mouth I turned around but shook my head. "No."
Jasper raised an eyebrow at me.
I laughed and continued to shake my head while catching a glimpse of Alice out of the corner of my eye. She stilled looked sadly out of the window, watching but not seeing as we past by the landscape outside.
"A hotel?" I raised an eyebrow at Edward when he parked his Volvo in the lot of a bed and breakfast.
"Staging post." He grinned at me before he exited the car and rounded it to open the door for me.
"You are making this thrilling." I laughed feeling excitement and curiosity bubble up inside of me.
Together with Alice and Jasper we went inside the cute looking bed and breakfast that was located near a beautiful looking sea which was surrounded by a breathtaking garden.
An older woman who worked at the bed and breakfast showed us the way to our room where Esme was already waiting. She stood in the middle of a huge living room surrounded by two large rolling racks filled with colourful dresses, boxes lying around on the couch and coffee table, a tall rolling mirror and a hair and make-up station.
Stepping closer to one of the rags I inspected the dresses carefully.
"That kind of reminds me of North and South. The series with Patrick Swayze." I mumbled gazing at the expensive and luxurious violet coloured fabrics in my hand that was velvety to the touch.
Edward chuckled behind me.
"That's just about right."
Confused I turned around to look at him.
"We are going to a masquerade ball." Esme gushed excitedly.
The ears of my subconscious peeked up and a half interested, half excited expression covered her face.
"The theme is North and South. It is a charity event for the local youth centre." Edward explained.
Orry Main! My subconscious sighed dreamingly and melted into a puddle of goo.
"Isn't Rosalie going?" I asked looking around but not seeing her.
"She and Emmett will turn up later in time for the fireworks." Jasper drawled while Alice was taking a scrutinizing look at the dresses. Judging by her approving expression she liked what she saw and her moon lifted a little.
"Jasper and I are going to the other room to change," Edward said before he and Jasper left leaving us woman among ourselves.
"Where did you get all this things from?" I asked in wonder.
"Alice bought those dresses from the productions of "North and South" and "Gone with the wind" back then." Esme answered and my yaw hit the floor.
"Are you serious?" I looked stunned at Alice who turned around, smile half-heartily at me and nodded her head before her smile vanished as she turned back to inspect the jewellery.
I turned back to Esme who had looked as worried at the little pixie as I felt about her.
"I love those movies." I blurted out to break through the awkward silence that suddenly covered the room like a heavy blanket.
"Then let's pick out a nice dress for you." She said stealing one last concerned glance at her daughter before we looked through the rags.
In the end I chose a deep blue coloured dress that had a contrast embroidery detail on the corset which ties at the back, and a flattering off the shoulder neckline. The ballgown skirt was huge and it was a little weird to walk in at first but I quickly got used to it.
Esme did my hair while Alice helped me with the make-up. Both Esme and I tried to cheer her up but Alice's usually bubbly personality just didn't want to show.
Edward's POV:
"This is just unbelievable." Anna marvelled as she saw the old Victorian villa and the huge, impressive gardens where the masquerade ball was taking place.
"I take it you like it." I murmured while I led her inside the old building.
"I love it." She beamed at me while her beautiful hazel pools sparkled from behind the delicate mask she wore.
My heart swelled in my chest and my breath caught when I saw that breathtaking smile on her face. It was the first of it's kind ever. One that truly reached her eyes and was the evidence of happiness.
I relished the warm feeling that spread through me at the thought that Anna seemed to enjoy herself a little that was what I was hoping to accomplish by bringing her here. For her to forget, to push the worries that constantly plagued her into the back of her mind and to relax even if it was only for a few hours.
"Let's look around," she smiled up at me and I made the mistake to look over at her.
The corset pushed up her breasts and a hot shiver run through every cell of my being, rocking my insides and filling my mind with images that were highly inappropriate.
"You alright?" She cocked her head the side and looked slightly confused at me.
Shaking my head I plastered a fake smile on my face and nodded offering her my arm which she took.
In that moment the illusion that being just friends with her was going to be easy got smashed into millions of pieces.
While walking around the impressive old building that was quite tastefully decorated I tried desperately to get a grip on myself but my emotions and hormones went through the roof despite my best efforts.
…Edward pull yourself together …. What's wrong with you? ... Jasper irritated and confused thoughts entered my mind.
"A little help would be nice." I hissed under my breath as I made eye contact with him.
His stunned eyes widened when he saw my face. He shook his head and laughed quietly before finally he made his way over to us and a wave of much needed calm seeped into me.
"Enjoying the party?" Jasper asked amused while he raised an eyebrow at me.
"This is unbelievable. I have never been to something like this." Anna beamed.
"There will be an auction later on. The items are displayed in the room over there," he pointed with his head.
"Have you found something you are interested in?" Anna asked and Jasper nodded. "Yes," looking down at Alice who stood uncharacteristically silent next to him.
I tried to read her thoughts for the millions time but she was again blocking me throwing in some x-rated images of her and Jasper once she noticed what I was doing.
… she will talk to you when she is ready… I have tried but it's not me she needs to have this talk with….
Jasper thought resigned. He hated to see Alice like this and to be useless, unable to take her sadness away.
"A dance darlin'?" Jasper drawled and whisked his wife onto the dance floor in the room next to us where a small band played.
"Would you like to dance too?" I asked Anna hopefully and in the same instant noticed that I didn't even know if she liked to dance or had ever learnt it.
She took a deep breath and narrowed her eyes at me in concentration.
"You see my mom," her voice shook slightly and she swallowed hard, "taught me to dance…. Just the basic steps … but it's been quite a while ago that I took the dance floor. So I might step on your toes… or humiliate myself and you entirely." She grimaced slightly while she had a far away look in her eyes.
I had no idea how often I had already wished to be able to read her mind but once again the longing burned hotly to be able to at least take one little glance into those mysterious thoughts of hers.
When she pursed her lips I couldn't help myself I had to chuckle at her adorableness before taking her hand into mine and I placed a kiss on her soft skin.
"I'll take the risk." I murmured while I looked hopefully into her eyes.
Her pink, glossy lips pressed into a thin line and she looked thoughtfully at me.
"OK, but to a slow song and only the simplest basic step …. I really haven't danced in quite a while. In case you haven't noticed I'm not exactly what you can call a party animal." She sighed but a ghost of regret and fear touched her beautiful hazel pools when she saw the couples dancing in the ball room.
Hating to see her in distress an idea suddenly shot through my mind and I couldn't help the sly smile that spread across my face.
"Where are we going?" She asked me confused when I let led her away from the room with the dancing couples.
"I thought you might like a little more private setting." I murmured while I guided her out onto the terrace and to the huge piazza of the old building.
My family and I had been to this event two years ago, before Bella came along, which was why I knew that for some reason rarely no one was to be found at the north side of the house.
"This garden is a dream," Anna breathed as she braced her hands against the snow white painted wood of the handrail and took a look at the pond that was nestled into the lush green of the grass and trees.
"Would you dance with me?" I asked her as I stepped up to her and held my hand out.
Anna cranked her neck smiling happily at me before she cockily raised an eyebrow.
"If you don't mind that I step on your toes." She said when she laid her hand into mine.
"I think I'll take the chance," I winked at her and she shook her head laughing as I pulled her to me.
Her beautiful, carefree laughter was such a wonderful sound it made my heart swell with joy as well as filling me with peace and harmony.
Pulling her into the middle of the piazza I beamed at her when she laced her fingers with mine and my other hand huddled against her waist as she took a strangled breath looking nervously up at me. My breath hitched at that innocent look and another shiver of desire rocked through my body before I was able to compose myself and reassuringly smile down at her.
…. We are friends!... Just friends….. I repeated the mantra over and over in my head while I pressed her against my body and we began to move to the music that travelled from the inside of the villa onto the patio.
The first few minutes were rather bumpy and she did fight with her dress a little but in the end caught up quickly and soon we slowly swayed over the dance floor.
"Are you enjoying yourself?" I murmured into her ear.
She shivered lightly when my cool breath touched her bare shoulder – I couldn't help but to feel delighted seeing her reaction to me - before she pulled little further away from me.
"Surprisingly, I haven't made a complete fool out of myself so … I guess …. yes," she laughed light-heartedly.
Sorry, Edward but I think I have to kidnap your dancing partner….. Jasper teased before he sobered up….. Alice is ready to talk …..
I groaned quietly.
"What's wrong?" Anna pulled a little away from me and looked curiously at me.
"May I ask for the next dance?" Jasper and Alice were suddenly in front of us.
Anna looked a little startled at them before she smiled and nodded.
Hesitantly I let her go, immediately missing her touch, her warmth, the feel of her in my arms as she stepped into my brother's waiting arms. I sighed looking longingly at her for another second before my gaze fell on my sister in front of me.
Alice had am unreadable expression on her face while she was still blocking me. She was gazing after Jasper and Anna as he pulled her further away from Alice and me.
"We need to talk," Alice looked up at me and stormed off without even waiting for any reaction from me.
"Alice?" I called after her while I followed her into the woods that surrounded the house where the charity ball was taking place.
Suddenly she stopped but didn't turn around to face me instead she opened her mind to me. Her thoughts were a mess and her breathe was leaving her mouth in angry pants.
"Bella has made mistakes ….. a lot of them," Alice suddenly whispered sadly and in her mind I saw the conflict she was caught up in. On one side she understood Bella's motivation but on the other side she also knew the consequences of her decisions and actions.
"Stealing someone else's life, including their family and everything in it, to throw it away two minutes later is a little bit more than a mistake, Alice." I sighed, feeling upset on Anna's behalf, and ran my hand through my hair.
"And sleeping with that mutt even though he was supposed to become her-son-in-law…" I shook my head in disgust unable to finish that sentence. If I would be able to get sick I would have been feeling nauseous in that very moment.
The thought alone that the dog had been meant to be part of my family was obscure and revolting to me and to think that it almost really happened. No matter how much I tried I could not see that going over well.
Rationally I knew that Bella had needed comfort and that she had chosen a "bad way" to make herself feel better or not to feel anything at all, whatever her intentions was, but the rest of me was just disgusted and disappointed with her.
"I know, Edward. I just thought you should know why she behaved that way." Alice murmured quietly, referring only to my first comment.
"But that doesn't really put her into a better light as you figured out on your own. Instead of deliberately hurting Anna further she chose to ignore to think of the impact her decisions had on others."
What made me angry was that Bella had not intended to tell me about the possibility of a pregnancy in case I would have taken her back.
I was aware of the fact that I was stubborn and not easy to deal with sometimes but that did not justify keeping something so important from me.
Looking back on the happenings of the past few weeks I became angrier and more disappointed with Bella.
"Do you think that everything would be different now if Bella had told us earlier about Renesmee?" My sister asked me in a sad voice.
I sighed pinching my nose with my thumb and forefinger thinking about it.
"We would have certainly taken a different path but in the end we would have encountered the same issues. Bella would have wanted to follow the schedule of the books while I would have stalled because of Anna." I paused to let the scenario play out in my minds eye and came up with a sobering result.
"Anna would not have stayed at our place or let anyone of us near her if I would have tired to figure things out with Bella." Relief that the picture that had just flashed through my mind was not reality washed over me.
"It's just hard to accept that….." her voice died down, her shoulders slumped down and she looked sadly at the ground. "Bella is the only friend I have ever had it hurts…so much….." her voice broke and her usually life filled and with happiness sparkling eyes were dead.
"I know Alice," I breathed softly while I stepped closer to her and pulled her into my arms.
"All my visions about you and Bella, about her being part of our family disappeared….. It's just… just…." She buried her head in my chest and the sobs that she had been trying to hold off tore out of her as she was saying goodbye to the future she had been seeing ever since Bella had entered our lives.