Chereads / Begging for Time / Chapter 7 - Cruel Twist of Fate

Chapter 7 - Cruel Twist of Fate

Tick

Tick

Tick

Tick

"Your memories."

The two words pound on his skull, rattling his mind as if it were hollow.

Tick

Life breathes cold and thin. The world around him falls into a numbing silence.

Tick

Fuzzy is the breeze against his skin.

Tick

It hurts…

Tick

The sound of a clock has never been so loud.

Tick

Its cruel rhythm evokes the endless march of time.

Tick

The vast city feels like a claustrophobic dome. Each tick echoes in the empty atmosphere.

Tick…

"What do you mean… memories?" Worry strangles his frail frame.

"…It was too soon after all…" Regret strings the elderly man. His old throat croaks. "Apologies, I"ve been far too hasty."

Timekeeper tears through his mind, searching for any words to say. 

This never gets easier.

"When you say memories…" It's Korlin that fills the void of sound. The boy fails to find light in the situation. "Do you mean… all of our memories?"

Timekeeper draws a dense breath. Swallowing his penitence, the man steels himself.

"The price for being reborn into this world... By the witch's evil design... 

Is to lose all the memories of your past life."

...

...

Not a single whisper. 

No one even breathes. 

All traces of life are vacant.

...

A gale shreds the null airspace, carrying the sweet smell of dread.

All of their hair whips along with the squall.

"...So," Sirius doesn't lift his head; the floor swallows his stare. "When this reaches zero... what happens to us?"

"...It begins with insignificant afterthoughts. Moments you barely care about or even remember. Slowly, you forget the people and things that mean nothing to you."

"..."

"As the countdown nears its end, you lose the memories with greater impact. One by one, the people, things, and experiences you think are important to you, all slowly start to fade. Your previous existence deterorates and escapes all proof of being. Until... all that's left is the memories that shaped you. The memories that make up your personality. But in the end, when the timer reaches zero, even those will be lost."

"..."

"..."

"So," Korlin sounds hopeless. Fragility beckons to break him. "When it reaches zero, are we just... brain dead?"

"No, nothing like that. You will still remember everything that has happened after you met the witch. You'll remember struggling to retain your memories. You'll remember trying to remember. Only the memories before your death will be lost."

"What if we write down our memories and keep reading them and picturing them in our head every day?"

"Like I said, once the memory is deemed unimportant enough, it will be displaced from your memory. One day you could remember and then the next it will be gone. No amount of prior visualization can stop it. Even if it is important enough, once the numbers run dry, it too will go away. No matter how hard you try."

"What about talking, breathing, and moving my body? Will I forget how to do that-?"

"No, you are doing that right now after all. As long as you maintain daily functions you will be fine. You may need to write down and study some words, though as long as you continue to communicate with others, you'll be fine."

Paralyzing stillness possesses each of them. None of them know what to say. None of them dare to move.

Sirius has done nothing but listen. Millions of thoughts torrent his fragile mind. His eye twitches, followed by his arms. 

He laughs.

A haunting, hollow titter. A snicker at the contrite man. 

He comes to a specious conclusion.

"This is a joke, isn't it?" Head in his hands, a distorted smile expands. "I mean, there's no way that's real. My memories will be ripped away when this clock reaches zero? That's bullshit."

Grimacing at the man, Sirius regresses into his primal state. For his entire life, he's made it a point to never trust anyone. With Korlin entering his life, Sirius brushed that fact a side. But now, he's been reminded of how people are.

And why he fails to make connections.

"Sirius..." Korlin meekly whispers.

"Unfortunately, it is true." Timekeeper nods quietly to himself.

Sirius' tone turns sour. An unprecedented hostility rises in his heart.

"How do you know-? What proof do you have? Huh?"

"Sirius lay off of him." 

Sirius steps in closer towards the man. 

"I mean seriously, do you really expect me to believe that?!"

"..."

Timekeeper allows the boy's frustration to play out. It's not like he'd be able to quell it.

"You probably gave these to us as a prank-" Sirius prepares to hurl his watch into the stone. 

"Sirius! Stop. This is probably hard on him too-"

"Huh? Why would it be?! How would he know what happens to us? He's probably just some senile, old-!"

"Because I too was like you!" 

-

...

The words reverberate in the surrounding air. Stilling even their heartbeats.

...

"...What?"

Timekeeper releases a bellowing sigh. 

"I am a human. A Witch Spawn. Just like you two."

"So, does that mean-" Korlin chokes on his words.

"Yes. Many, many years ago I lost the memories of my past."

The man doesn't look sad, not at all. He appears... content.

"..."

"At first, I desperately tried to regain my memories. I struggled, I cried, I cursed my own weakness and beat myself up over it. But, once they were gone... I started living." Tears threaten to fall from his eyes. "I dedicated my life to helping those who tried to help me. To trying to help the humans that awaken here. Heck, I even invented those watches."

...

The old man's words are heartfelt and genuine.

This should be an uplifting moment. A moment in which he calms down and regains his mental balance.

But Sirius feels nothing. Nothing but fear and self-pity.

He stares at his watch, "That's impressive." Despite his mood, the words are legitimate.

"After a while, I forgot I never lived here. And that was okay. I made friends. I got a well-paying job. I met so many new people..." Timekeeper smiles down at his ring. "I even met my wife."

A light wind brushes against the man. His warmth replaces that of the absent sun.

"That's beautiful," Korlin affirms. His lack of concern worries Sirius.

"Yes, it is." The man looks as if he could cry of joy. He's truly lived a blessed life. "So you see, you need not worry about your waning memories. You'll overcome this hurdle and once all is said and done... you'll be happy."

They sit with their thoughts a moment. Each of their mindsets are on completely different fields.

-Happy... huh?

"So," Sirius pronounces. "When does it happen? How much time do we have?"

Timekeeper pauses.

Hesitation envelops him whole, it does the both of them. It takes twenty seconds for the tension to reach its climax.

He locks eyes with the boy and the fateful words pass his lips.

"A year." 

"..."

The words are a flashbang in his ears.

Dizziness devours his stance. Something has snapped.

"Actually, it would be less than that now since..."

The man's words trail off into a deafening ring. Everything he says is now no more than a mumbled mess. 

Sirius stumbles backwards. It feels as if he's been struck by another truck. This whiplash of emotions is too overwhelming. It's all in slow motion. 

-What is this?

He's light-headed. If he stops moving for even a moment, he'll likely faint. Never before has he felt such distortion. 

"Sirius...?" Korlin's mouth enunciates the name, but Sirius can't hear. The sound of the clock rattles his staggered mind. "Are you alright?" The question both echoes and doesn't make a sound.

A year. 

So long yet so fleeting.

-Was this more or less time than I was expecting? I don't know. Why do I care...? 

His palm smacks over his forehead. He holds it there, checking for an ailment. With the look on his face, he may as well have one.

"Sorry-"

It barely squeaks out his throat.

He manages to lift his head to them. It's then something dawns on him.

Their eyes. 

Korlin and the man's eyes stalk him. 

Their eyebrows are knitted in worry, belittling him into the dirt.

Ever since he was little, Sirius has hated being looked at. 

He didn't mind the stares of the townsfolk when he first awoke. Their looks were more... disgusted, annoyed even. That, coupled with the fact that he had just emerged from the ground, and they were strangers, made their gazes bearable. 

But the looks from people he knows... 

Those are the ones that matter. 

The ones he hates. 

Especially the look they give him now. The one he hates most of all...

The look of pity.

-What am I doing...? Why am I acting like this?

His shock of the timeframe and memories vanish for a moment. Those feelings are replaced with both frustration and self-consciousness.

"Sorry, I need to... step away for a minute."

Sirius fixes his composure, smiles, and strides away from the two.

"Wait-! Sirius-"

Their distant conversation picks up. 

-They're talking about me, aren't they?

Once out of sight, he breaks into a jog. The jog evolves into a run. 

-Stop it. Don't pity me.

He runs and runs.

The pocket watch he holds extends its bombardment. 

Tick

Their eyes sear into his brain.

TiCk

-"Your memories."

TICk

-"A year."

Erratic memories project themselves in his mind. 

TICK

His childhood home. Teetering on a tire roped up on a large tree.

TICK

Drawing with sticks in wet sand. The waves crashing, washing their images away.

TICK

His first dog. His first friends. His first love interest.

TICK

Leaving those friends forever. His new friends. Leaving them too.

TICk

Recieving medals and trophies. His father smiling. Quitting sports.

TiCk

The dog goes away. A new dog.

Tick

School. Houses.

Tick

The memories begin to blend together. 

tick

His sprint slows to a halt. With his hands on his knees, he catches his breath. 

-All of those memories will go away. Why? I don't want that. Who will I be when they're gone?

Another thought crosses in the endless stream. Those memories...

-Why am I so scared to lose them?

For years, he's felt nothing but insufferable mundanity. Or rather, the absence of emotion. Why feel so scared? For these worthless fragments of his life? 

He doesn't know.

A tinge of guilt shrouds him. How can I think like that? That's disrespectful to the people who raised me. To the people who gave me those memories.

Another wave of guilt. 

-What am I doing...? I just ran away from those two. I should go back and apologize-

...

But he doesn't want to.

Something is telling him it's better to be alone. That's how it should be.

That's how it's always been.

He wants to ask Timekeeper if there is a way to keep his memories. But he doesn't want to see those eyes again. He can't. He knows they'll be there, stalking him. If he asks and there is no answer, it'll be even worse.

More pity would follow.

Korlin has been a breath of fresh air. That boy was the most fun he's had with someone. Ever. He doesn't want to lose that...

Yet, in the back of his mind, more dark thoughts intrude.

-Is Korlin just pretending? He doesn't want me around. He's just staying with me out of pity, isn't he? He's a liar... isn't he?

...

Sirius faces the path he came from. He stares blankly at it, then turns around. 

Leaving that which he has built once again, Sirius severs his ties with the two.

Falling right back in his own trap, he drowns with self-hatred.

He walks away. He's running away. 

Just like he always has. 

22828877 seconds remain.