Well, then let's get started. My name is Mark D. Vader (well, my dad had a sense of humor, but jokes on him are a thing). I am somewhat of an "otaku" in the sense that I spend most of my time between fanfiction and anime when not at work.' Ah, I remember it like it was yesterday. Driving my crappy old Honda to work on some backroads since I lived in the middle of nowhere, it was a wonderful sunny spring day. *CRACKBOOOM*....'
(some time later)
'Lack of feeling-checkI can't see anything; checkThoughts are super clear for absolutely no reason; check Well, I seem to have died...'....'I wonder how long I've been here?'...'OK, I really need to do something to keep myself sane. I wonder if, if I wake up (assuming I'm comatose), one piece will be finished. Probably not, but a man can dream...'....'GOD DAMMIT, I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!! You'd think having a super memory and being able to re-watch shit in your mind would stave off boredom, and it has, but all the other memories of an uneventful life just make me depressed.'...'Huh, is it brighter????'*FLASH*'AHHHHH!! MY EYES!!!! (Do I even have eyes???) THE PAIN THE AG-'
???*ehem* "HELLO YOUNG SOUL."
Mark:Dam, that's loud. Either I've finally cracked or I'm not alone anymore. WHAT!!'
???"WELL *ehem* well, sorry about that; most souls I come across out here are so far gone that it's nearly impossible to get noticed. Here in the void, they either get fractured from the strain, then dissipate due to a lack of stimulus leading to inanity, or just shut down and fade away."
Mark: 'So I am special or something? Wait, are you reading my mind?'.
???"Yes, I am reading your mind. No, in the grand scheme of things, you are not special. In the context of you still being somewhat okay after spending a few hundred years here, yo-'
Mark: 'A FEW HUNDRED YEARS!!!'"Yes, now quiet. As I was saying, souls getting lost in the void is quite common; sadly, we've been trying to patch that up, but it just keeps happening. Anyway, you got unbelievably lucky."
Mark: 'Me, lucky? How? My luck has always been shit.'
???"lucky in a sense that this part of the void's timey wimey stuff was much slower when unobserved compared to the vast majority of the void. While I said you were for a few hundred years, the rest of creation has had eons of development."
Mark: 'HOW IS THAT LUCKY?'
???- "Well, I imagine not going anywhere due to the peculiarities of this small pocket in comparison to most souls I come across due to how hard it is to find something so small in the infinite void. Then there is the fact that most of your soul is still together, and the parts of it that have loosened from your brief periods of idleness are still around so I can put you back together. Finally and most importantly, I came across you instead of some void beast that would have devoured you."
Mark: *internally sweats as soul shudders* 'lucky me. So, now that I think about it, who are you and what happens next?'
???- "Just call me R.O.B., and I think you can guess what happens next."
Mark, 'isekai, awesome! Wait...why me?'
R.O.B.: "So, when someone has spent time in the void, they don't go through regular reincarnation, and if I just shunt you into it now, it can mess up the system. The problems a single void-touched soul can cause the system vs. the problems one can make in a new world as they are cleansed of the void aren't even comparable. The only reason we even clean out the void is because every soul that fully dissipates leaves behind soul energy that attracts more souls into the void Just know that this can cause problems in the long run."
Mark: 'Ok, so... what happens now? Do I get wishes or spin a wheel or something?'
R.O.B.: "First, I need to check your file, then see what options are available for you depending on what worlds you can travel to... WHAT!!!! This can't be right... Do you remember how you died? Your file is missing, and I really don't want to have to go back to the office to find out."
Mark: 'Well, I think I was struck by lightning and my car exploded...in the middle of spring...on a clear day! OMG, I am so not lucky. *sulks*.'
R.O.B.: "Ugh, come on, I need to take you to my office to get this sorted out."*FLASH*....(The scene shifts to a quaint office cubicle.)Mark:Wow, *looks around* I kind of thought I would be more grand or something.'
R.O.B.: "Just wait patiently for a bit; there's something weird about your death. The file says you should have died about 48 years later than you did, contrary to the popular belief that almost never EVER happens; even truck-kun takes someone when they should have actually died. Sometimes death can come late, but it almost never comes early."
Mark:So I should have died at 73 instead of 25. Well, while you're in there, can you tell me what became of my family?'
R.O.B.: "Ah, here it is. It seemed that when one of your colleagues was fired, you were killed by him slamming the door on his way out. It wasn't picked up because divine intervention doesn't show up in a soul's history and needs a deeper system check. As for your family, your older brother found out about your death last, and it didn't really affect him all things considered; your older sister found out first and had the misfortune of telling everyone else; your younger sister eventually named her son after you; your father had little to no reaction but died a few years later; your mother was devastated but bounced back eventually."
Mark: 'Thanks, so what now? Does anything special happen because of divine intervention?'
R.O.B.: "Usually it doesn't, but you are a special case... Due to your death-stopping traffic on that small road, you inadvertently stopped a couple that would have died that day on the way to a fertility clinic. With your death, they gave birth to twins, one going on to help space travel and colonize Mars, the other making various medical breakthroughs, aiding in the cures for various diseases, and most importantly, being responsible for approximately 47.65% of the cure for cancer. Normally, your karma and theirs would have no connection at all; however, your death being directly responsible for their births, you went from an average person to practically a saint. Karma in itself isn't all that important unless it gets large enough. For example, someone with +/- 100–1000 karma will either be a little lucky or unlucky; when it gets to the tens of thousands, you get a good or bad gambler; in the millions, you get a lottery winner or a crippling injury, etc. You get the point. Right?"
Mark:Yeah, I guess, but what does that mean exactly?'
What it means is that you have about 15 billion positive karma; now most karma gets washed away when reincarnated unless it's over about 100 million. That's where you get lucky people, and with about a billion, you get a'son of heaven'. Normally one would get memory wiped because of soul stress; yours was fine, so you get them, then karma is wiped or a small perk if it's big enough. You have so much bullshit karma that it gets complicated; if we do this the normal way, you'd probably end up some hero in whatever world you're sent to and have to fix all of its problems and be a typical Shonen protagonist."
Mark-'NO WAY!!! I don't want to face slap young masters; I just want to have a fulfilling life, given that I practically wasted my first.'
R.O.B.:Huh, some people go for that. Then what we have to do is somehow use up that karma in perks, skills, or talents so you can have a somewhat fresh slate. The most you can keep is about 10 million for a somewhat lucky new life."Mark: Great, let's get this show on the road.'
R.O.B.:I figured as much; now for where to reincarnate you, the list of worlds you can go to is quite extensive, so I'll just show you the ones you are even remotely familiar with."
Mark:Let's see here: STB, DBZ, One Piece, DXD, Shougeki no Soma, Bleach, Ben 10, Twilight, HP, RWBY, Rick and Morty, Pokémon, Soul l Land,... O there are a lot, so maybe I was an otaku. Ummm can you just like lottery wheel these?'
R.O.B.: "Hmm, sure, I can *snap* now, just spin it."
Mark-'.....'
R.O.B-"OH! Right, no hands. I'll just do it then. (Spins wheel) *click click click...* So your world is Danmachi."
Mark: 'Not bad, I'll miss technology, but after hundreds of years of boredom, I want to do something... I'd like to have adventurer parents, maybe retired and living somewhere, and to be able to get to Orario a year or so before Cannon.'
R.O.B.:Okay,now to reincarnate you into a good family in Danmachi and get you set up to enter or be in Oroario at least a year or so before 'Canon' that costs about 2.8 billion karma, it's so expensive because the world is a dangerous place, so being born somewhere in Deadealus as an orphan is quite cheap, like 100 karma, but usually it's random and transmigration is usually free, but you aren't eligible for it because of the void. Now for skills, perks, magicc, and wishes"
Mark-'Okay,hmmm..... For my first wish, I want a skill that gives me 10% of the attributes of things I kill. For my second wish, wait... can I customize how I look, or is it random?'
Choosing is free because it usually never matters in the long run; that first wish will take about 6 billion karma because it greatly helps one break the mortal shackles and could even even give divinity if done the right or wrong way."
Mark:Wow, that's expensive, hmmm. Let's change that to 5% then. My second wish is for a fully stocked gate of Babylon, knowing intuitively everything that threatens it, and knowing that it ranks up as I level (i.e., level 0–1 E rank: NP, 2D, 3C, 4B, 5A, 6Ex). Misc. things such as training manuals and water/food will be usable immediately, crafting materials at level 2, potions at level 3, and divine stuff at level 4 (herbs of immortality and such).'
R.O.B.: "With that change, your first wish is 3.5 billion. The second wish is 4.7 billion instead of 12 billion because of the limitations. You are fortunate the price didn't consider your first wish; otherwise, the lowered difficulty would have made it much more expensive, around $8 billion."
Mark:Nice, for my last wish, I want a skill that allows me to summon a trio of angeloids: Ikaros, Astraea, and Oregano.'
R.O.B.: " Too expensive, you gotta change it; that skill would cost you 38.65 billion because of the world setting, their power being about level 5-7 for Ikaros and Astraea, their weapons being too strong for the setting, and their ability to also receive a fauna to get stronger."
Mark: 'Dam, o how about they share falna stats with me starting as level 1's? They have their own skills and magic; when I level up, they do too. Their weapons and items shall become growth weapons instead of being OP. If they die or are heavily injured, I can re-summon them after dismissing them either individually or all together with a lapse of 7 days in which they shall be unconscious, knowing time has passed to protect their sanity.'
R.O.B.:Smart of you to lower their levels but still leave room for them to become stronger than they were originally, especially Oregano. With all that done, it comes to 18.95 billion, mostly because their weapons and armor, even at level 10, will be weaker than moon-destroying stuff, so they are still too expensive. Think of a way to make it cheaper or give up."
Mark:*Ugh*...remove the transport cards and make pandora mode a level 5 skill.'
R.O.B.:That makes it 3.83 billion; yeah, those cards are super OP. Anything else you want to do with the last 160 million, assuming you want to keep 10 million for good luck?"
Mark:Yeah, I want to look like Gilgamesh from Fate, but with black hair and 6.5 feet of height, make the tattoos a birthmark. Use the rest of the karma to make my body grow optimally before I get my falna at 15 and increase my combat talent in combat and magic. If there is any left over, just distribute it to my parents at my birth for a better family life.'
R.O.B.:That works fine for me; the looks are free. Optimal growth is 20 million because it will turn into a skill, and nutrition isn't the best in the medieval world. Increasing your talent costs $100 million; you should be about as talented as Baki compared to Yujiro, so not a monster but pretty good. The last 30 million will be split between your parents. Now goodbye; you will get your memories at 5."
Mark: Thanks and bye.'(FLASH!! *Dissapears*)R.O.B.:With a soul like his, as long as he doesn't personally doom and enslave the world, I should be getting a promotion. *sigh* This paper work won't do itself."