It's been three months since I've been here. During those three months, I've become pretty confident in hearing and signing the Zhuqili language alongside the other languages that were brought to my attention. Writing, however, still proved to be a challenge.
Every day was pretty peaceful, with learning, eating, and occasional outings, mostly going to the actual market that was in this city, which I preferred more as the crowd was thinner and the noise level was like a slight hum.
My episodes are still going on strong. Maybe I can say I built a little pain tolerance for it as I no longer cry anymore. Though occasionally I will get that bad one, which makes my body still move around like a roach being killed by bug spray each time. The major change, however, was:
The door opened and an excited little girl came skipping in front of me on the other side of the dusk. Plopping herself down, she beamed as she shouted a happy "Ignis!" Behind her, an 8-year-old boy walked in, closing the door after him, before sitting by the girl. His dark blue eyes looked at me cautiously with a small smile on his face.
These two.
I felt my eye twitching.
Zhuo Mei has been on me like fly-on-dung after finding me in the courtyard one day. The other kids lived far away, while the boy in purple lived close by and, most likely, rather than not, was right by her side. So at least it's two and not all 12.
At first, they treated me like a baby bird that needed protection but I guess my older mentality showed more than my physical aspects as they started treating me like an older brother. In a way, it's nice because I would hate to be treated as a baby by someone younger than me but on the other hand, they did what typical younger siblings do.
Bother the hell out of me.
"You're still reading that book, Ignis? You've been reading it these past months!" Zhou Mei dramatically said, waving her arms like she couldn't believe what she was seeing. In all honesty, I can't believe it either.
I opened the book after waking up from the discussion between Aadrika and Ataksak, thinking I should start learning as soon as possible. I always had a lot of pride when it came to my learning capabilities. I mean, I was able to mostly learn another language in a matter of three months with no breaks. I wasn't called a genius for no reason.
Yet here I am three months later, with a hurt back from hunching over this book and a bruise on my ego. Even as these months go by, I still have no idea what the heck this book is describing to me.
The book had little words but many dots and lines right below it on one page, while on the page was a drawing of a woman with little to no features who was drawn in a weird yet elegant pose. Each flip of a page has the same outline: little sentences on top of the picture that covered the whole right page, a combination of lines and dots that were separated into a couple of sections throughout the right page, and a black and white drawing of a woman as she does... Yoga?
I first looked into the words but the little sentence would be simple wording like, "A start of a creation" or "Taxation to expand." I tried to look at the dots and lines but nothing came to mind. I counted each different dot and different lines to see if it was like a code.
I even talked to Zhou Li about it, since the two women who said I wouldn't see much were truthful in their words, no matter how much I tried to reach out to them. Zhou Li couldn't understand it either and after helping me for a month, he concluded it was probably gibberish that was made from lost translation.
I even looked at the pictures, trying to copy them but some of them were nearly impossible to do. Even I was on the verge of agreeing with Zhou Li but if there is a feeling of the sun on it, then there must be something here that I currently don't have the knowledge to answer.
"Sometimes I think you fall asleep underneath that mask because of the way you just freeze like that." Zhou Mei said, bringing me out of my pondering. Sighing, I close the book and look over at her, who is giving me a big smile.
"That's more like it. When I was your age, I was playing under the sun and catching frogs yet here you are cooped up in here like a turtle." She reprimanded me like she wasn't just three years physically older than me.
I couldn't help but scoff as I signed, "Knowledge is good. It's something everyone needs to have and the more you have it, the more you can do things. Become things. Plus, the outside is cold since we are entering winter and the frogs you mentioned gave you poisonous warts no more than three weeks ago. You need to stop touching them before Zhou Li ties your hands to your head."
Zhou Mei flinched at the mention of Zhou Li, clearly remembering her wart visit when we first met, where the man had to literally chain her feet down to the ground so she couldn't run from her treatment. Then for the treatment, she screamed like a banshee the whole ten minutes as Zhou Li had to freeze the warts, scrape them off, then go into the infected tissues and sever any infection.
My ears rang for the whole day from her screams.
The blue-eyed boy, who I know as Jiang Wu, laughed as Zhou Mei blushed in embarrassment while trying to fight off a smile. "Okay, maybe not play with frogs. I don't want Uncle Li to make me an armpit exposer." I couldn't help but chuckle at that, as the child always had a weird way with words.
Smiling, she rolled her eyes before saying in exasperation, "Then what do you want to do? Uncle Li is currently at a medical convention and Auntie Liang is out to visit family. Since you've been here, they've cuddled you to themselves. I want to cuddle you too and now's my chance!" The last part had sounds of grievance in it, making me laugh more.
To some degree, Zhou Mei was right that the husband-and-wife couple has been really attached to me. At first, I thought it was only Chen Liang but slowly I noticed I was mistaken, as even Zhou Li was quite attached to me since the market.
He just did it in a quieter way compared to his wife, like waiting for me to join him to read at night before he starts to read or having made a scheduled time that no matter who I was with, where I was, or what I was doing, he would quietly pick me up, and together he would teach me medicine for a good two hours.
At first, I thought that they were really starting to replace me as their child but then I saw it. The little glances Chen Liang made at the beautiful cabinet that stood quietly against the wall. Then those glances became stares, and then those stares became lingering touches. Then one day, catching one of the very rare few times of sleep, I woke up to her kneeling, looking at the closed cabinet with eyes that held unspoken stories.
I watched her a bit. Her form slowly morphed into that of another woman who was sitting in front of the TV, surrounded by empty bottles, while she watched videos of her dead son when he was younger. The sight made my throat constrict and tears prick behind my eyes. Taking deep breaths to soothe my incoming episode, I got out of bed quietly before kneeling beside her.
My sudden appearance startled her before she relaxed and gave me a soft smile before turning her sight back to the cabinet, as if she could see through the closed doors to the altar that lay quietly inside. We sat there quietly for a bit before she broke the silence.
"He died from sickness." She murmured, causing me to look up at her but her eyes still looked ahead, so I did the same, giving her as much comfort as I could offer while peeking towards her from the corner of my eye.
Breathing in, she closed her eyes, holding her breath, before exhaling slowly and opening her eyes again. Her brown eyes held much more strength than they had ever held since my time with her. Even if the eyes had a red tint to them.
"His first symptoms started when he just turned one. Me and Zhou Li woke up to him crying at us while he was puking all over himself. It was such a scary sight because he was such a quiet baby. Quiet and smart—that made the other parents tell us how lucky we are to have such a child as our first one. Thus, we instantly knew something was wrong." She stopped talking and closed her eyes, taking deep breaths for a bit while I quietly sat by her.
"After doing tests, looking for injuries, checking what he has eaten the whole week and day, and even having people look around the compound to see if there was anything dangerous, he might've been around, we didn't find anything wrong. It's funny, isn't it? How could two doctors not find anything wrong with their patient, no less their own son?" A bitter laugh escaped her while her hands were clenched in her lap.
"People told me he was probably entering his crying stage finally and to not worry because other babies were like that. They told me he was fine. Healthy. Yet I didn't believe them. In my gut, I knew something was wrong but no matter how much me and Zhou Li looked, we couldn't find what was wrong, so we accepted that maybe they were right. Maybe it was all in our heads and our son was fine." Her tears finally escaped her eyes as they fell silently down her face.
"I'm so stupid. So, so stupid." She laughed mockingly at that before placing her hands on her eyes and taking shaking breaths. I scooted over towards her and patted her back with my hand, which she immediately took and dragged me towards her lap, where she cried while hugging me.
We sat like that for a while before she sniffled and wiped her tear-stained face with her sleeve. She sniffled a couple times before continuing to talk in a much quieter voice. "At first he was fine, returning to his regular self, making us believe that what everyone had said was true. He just had a tiny crying stage. However, after two months, we were quickly hit with another night of waking up and him throwing up, but this time this one was so much worse. After throwing up, he started shaking violently, his eyes rolling back while it looked like he couldn't breathe."
Dread was slowly creeping up on me as I slowly figured out what was going on. She continued talking, sounding monotonous by the second. "We immediately went into overdrive, looking up what was happening. We invited doctors from other cities, provinces, and even countries to come look at him. Days went by, then weeks, then months, and then it became a year and a half with no answer to what was going on."
I looked up at her, who returned to look at the cabinet. "During the whole time of finding doctors, I watched as he deteriorated, slowly losing his appetite, always tired, and falling whenever he tried to stand. I watched and listened to people who said they were my friends stay away from us, calling my family cursed. Saying my son had a demon latch on to him even though we already asked monks to come look at him and tell us there was nothing there."
Her brown eyes lost their sadness as anger slowly entered them. "If they didn't call us cursed, then they would be blaming me. Telling me to pray to forgive my sins because of why?" She laughed bitterly as poison seeped through her words: "Because my body wasn't healthy enough to produce a healthy child. It's amusing, isn't it? I am a doctor who always checks my body, doing daily checks, yet suddenly my body wasn't healthy for my child. Yet what is funnier is that I actually began to believe them. Crying myself to sleep after praying for hours on no end."
"It was three months before his third birthday when a distant friend of Zhou Li informed us of a wondering cultivator who practiced rare inner body medicine who might help us. When we contacted him, he told us a significant price for his aid, the highest that any other doctor had informed us. Yet this was our last chance; thus, we told him we would sell our house if he were to come and even signed a contract with our souls on the line." Sadness came back to her eyes, the anger leaving like it was never there.
She breathed in before stealing herself as she spoke. "When he came, he immediately went to work. He closed his eyes, while his hand started glowing as he glided above my son's body. He went from toe to the top of his head before stopping above his forehead. He frowned while opening his eyes, turning his sight towards us." I clenched my fist before the next words came out. "I will never escape his voice as he told us that there was something growing big in our son's brain. Something that, unless you had great cultivation for it, a mythical medicine for it or-."
A sob wreaked on her body and I quickly hugged her form, which was shaking as she sobbed out, "-was early enough to catch it; it couldn't be treated and our son will die. And true to his words, our son didn't wake up from sleep the next day."
Sobs filled the room. I was patting her back when I looked over from her body to spot a silently standing Zhou Li, who was crying from where he stood. Seeing me look at him, he quickly walked over and hugged us both. There, the three of us held each other the whole day.
That incident happened last month and it did bring us closer in a way that we're more comfortable and transparent. When I asked her, did she feel better now? There were many ways someone would answer that question but Chen Liang knew what I meant as she looked over the cabinet she still hadn't opened.
"One day I will open those doors and show him that mommy is fine. Is better. I don't want to show him such a weak version of me." She whispered. A twinge of pain came from my chest but I pushed it down. She looked over at me before rubbing my face. "Ignis, you might not know but..." She then began speaking in a different language. When I looked up at her, she gave me a joking smile, clearly not going to tell me what she just said.
Of course, there are things I won't say to them either, like being actually 15 years older than I currently look. Trust doesn't mean you can't have secrets. You just can't betray the other person.
"And you're doing it again. Statue Ignis! Wake up!" I felt my mask get tapped, snapping me from my memory lane into present-day reality. "And he's back to human! Everybody applauds for his hard work on becoming a real boy!" Zhou Mei said it in an announcement manner while clapping her hands dramatically and Jiang Wu followed, smiling with a little laughter escaping here and there.
Sighing I signed, "Okay, okay, my bad. You guys said something?" Zhou Mei groaned before rolling her eyes and repeating what she just said.
"Well, we were discussing that maybe we can go to the medical center. They're currently hiring volunteers of all ages." Zhou Mei informed. I couldn't help looking at her because that didn't sound like anything a six-year-old or an eight-year-old, no less an alleged three-year-old, wants to do and even if it was, it just didn't fit with her.
Feeling my stare behind the mask, her happy-go-lucky smile became a hesitant one before a faint blush took over her face. "Okay, okay, just because you have that mask on your face doesn't mean I don't know that you're judging me, Ignis!" She whined.
"I thought you didn't like the doctors much. I mean, you almost puked on your own uncle in the face just from being in the same vacancy when he was healing someone, and now you want to voluntarily go to a place that does that but multiplies it by hundreds?" I paused, trying to rationalize my own question but gave up when it led to dead ends in reasoning. "I have my doubts."
She wiggled in her seat, which became a little more frantic when Jiang Wu looked at her with curiosity. She finally gave up, trying to escape from answering as she whispered, "One of the biggest cultivation sects is about to come to the city in a couple of months." Jiang Wu's eyebrow furrowed before something clicked in his head as he gave her sympathetic eyes.
"They won't accept people, no matter their age, if they haven't made good contributions to the world." She paused as if wanting to say something but decided against it as she shook her head before continuing. "I believe this could help me a bit more to have a better chance of getting in."
I watched as she gave me a wobbly smile, her hands now on the table in clenched form. I knew there was more to it but respecting her boundaries, I didn't push it; instead, I agreed we should do volunteer work.
I still don't know much about the world, but I do know that there are cultivation sects. Cultivation was something I don't have much knowledge of since there's little to no books about it in the mountains there are in this room.
However, I know it's the main power in this world—a power that's based on the system that almost every living thing here has been put into by the people in this world. Of course, the systems are different based on what living thing you are looking at. For example, Plant Medical System were one of the easiest systems to understand.
The system was split into two. One system that is graded by color describes the rarity of purity it has, and the other one is graded by numbers from 1 to 10, by its age. The purer it is, the higher the chances of cultivating medicine you can succeed in making and also the higher the chances of making better quality. The more it ages, the more potent it will be, making the medicine more effective.
The system didn't factor in the plant type or rarity of the plant species itself. For the latter, it's because plant types didn't really matter but for the former, it's because it doesn't matter how low purity it was or how old it is. If it's a rare plant, then it's a rare plant. People will die for a rare plant of the lowest quality because the effects of the plant will be of huge benefit if they succeed in using it.
I saw a bit of medicine-making with Zhou Li, but understanding the system and putting it into practice were two different matters. I almost joked, "You're a wizard, Harry," to him when he was putting the plants in a big metal bowl called a cauldron. Or maybe it was more of a witch thing, especially with the way he smiled and laughed when he completed it.
Like a switch, her easy, free smile returned to her face as she got up to do a little celebration dance. She made her way to the door as she spoke, "Okay, let me inform my dad and we can go."
Right before she fully exits the door, she stops, turns around, and points at me. "Also, what do I say when using complicated words, Ignis? I could only understand half of what you signed. I have only been learning for two months!" She huffs before finally leaving the room with me chuckling and a silently laughing Jiang Wu.
It didn't take long before we were in an actual carriage. I was sitting on one side with a woman attendee that's supposed to watch over us, while on the other side, Jiang Wu and Zhou Mei were chatting with one another, already knowing I didn't like to talk much. Finger cramps were a pain.
Since being here, I've been wearing nothing but black robes with yellow accents. Even now, I'm wearing a black Hanfu with a yellow chrysanthemum* stitched into it. I've always been particular about matching colors together and since I'm wearing this mask almost 90% of the day, it just means I'm going to wear clothes that match it.
Chen Liang noticed this particularity of mine and has told me she can buy more masks in other colors but for some reason I'm attached to this mask. Maybe because it's the first one I've gotten but it just smooths something in me that grows every day.
Of course, it doesn't really stop my episodes but my emptiness—that I'm now finally admitting that I may be a little depressed—has lessened the mental strain. Of course, it didn't take it away but it's helping me deal with it so I can focus on the important task.
Getting strong so I can return to my family.
My right hand started to tremble. Ignoring it, I clench around it with my left hand and close my eyes, fully sinking into the soft cushioned seat with the small episode running its course through my nerves. To distract myself, I thought of the book I still haven't been able to decipher. However, I give up after dead ends are the only landmarks I'm getting.
When we reach the medical center, there are many people around as they roam the building, which appears to be three floors high. I follow after the excited Zhou Mei and Jiang Wu, glancing around in the greenery courtyard, while holding hands with the woman attendee, who was looking around with a warm smile on her face that didn't match the coldness in her eyes.
I studied the place before reaching the conclusion that there are four groups of people in the whole place. The first group is those in white Hanfus, who all wore their hair up with a mask over their faces as they scurried around quickly. They are doctors, as they dress similar to Zhou Li and Chen Liang whenever they have patients.
The second group all wore mismatched outfits, but they also had their hair up and masks wrapped around their lower faces, like the doctors. They quickly follow after the people in white as they scurry around. I deduce them to be volunteer people.
The third group are those in blue one-piece garments that, I'm surprised, look similar to the infamous modern-day patient wear. Except these hospital gowns don't have an open back like modern-day ones. They were even customizable, as I noticed some of the gowns had sleeves on them or were long enough to cover people's feet. I easily labeled them as patients.
The last group were the mismatched robes that didn't have mask or had their hair pinned up. These groups of people mostly follow next to patients; only a few of them follow doctors with sad looks in their eyes. I concluded that these are the family members or close people of the admitted patients.
When we entered the main building, I thought I had gone back to my world, if not for the matching-style clothing everyone was wearing. The space we entered is a white waiting room, lined up with organized chairs that cover most of the area. In the front of the space, the first place you see when walking in is a receptionist counter, where two lines are formed.
We entered the shorter of the two lines, one of which was quickly going by. It took over five minutes before we were greeted by a lady who was smiling as she asked questions. When she got to the age question, she looked down at me with hesitance on her face.
The woman attendant, Lou, quickly informed her, "He's more mature than he looks. Even more mature than the two in front." This quickly got the attention of both 6- and 8-year-olds, who looked up at her, offended, while the receptionist laughed before asking a couple more questions. Seeing nothing wrong, she gave us our "uniforms" before telling us a room number for the doctor we would be helping with.
Right when she was about to send us to the doctor, an abundance of fluster footsteps was heard coming our way. Turning around, I saw a group of four doctors and eight volunteers come swarming in. In the middle of them is a stretcher, with someone laid on it, that I couldn't really see with my small height.
They were talking over one another before disappearing in one of the three hallways. No one in the building made any reactions to the sighting, as it was probably a daily thing, so I didn't think much of it either, as we were officially set out to be volunteers.
Volunteer work was like going to school or work; you had your calm days, stressful days, tiring days, wishing for someone to set the place on fire, or all-together days. Lucky for me, most of my days throughout the two weeks of volunteering have been pretty calm.
It does help that I know quite a bit of medicine herbs from Zhou Li and Chen Liang, who have come back from their trips. It also helps that I'm mentally 18. The two children I came here with, however, were another story.
On the very first day, we all had the same doctor; however, that soon changed on the third day, when Zhou Mei puked after seeing someone else puke, and then someone else puked after seeing her puke.
The whole tiled floor was covered in puke and I stood in the corner, gagging alongside other people, while the doctor told them to go wash themselves, including a very embarrassed Zhou Mei. It was disgusting.
And then there was Jiang Wu, who I thought to be better but he was someone who couldn't handle insects. Which was ironic because his favorite person in the world's favorite place was the pond.
So, when he saw someone have bugs attached to them, his scream could ravel Zhou Mei's and that was saying something. I also couldn't blame him. The bugs were literally eating through the person's body from the inside. I guess the only reason I didn't panic was because such a scene is a classic in most body-deformation horror movies.
Of course, I wasn't a perfect person by any means. My blood avoidance wasn't something I only experienced in my dreams, which was a rude wake-up call. When I saw someone covered in blood, a shot of pain almost knocked me out.
I had to quickly exit the space and find a corner in a secluded place to calm down, which hurt like hell. Luckily, no one found me during it, so after I rode out my panic, I immediately requested to be put in an area where blood wouldn't be seen much.
So, everyone got separated to different doctors to better fit with them. Zhou Mei was tasked with forging herbs in the hospital's garden, Jiang Wu was placed to bring food to patients, and I was to help those who were mostly healed with anything they needed me to do.
I'm currently helping an older woman with a foot message as she chats with me endlessly. Since I've been placed here, I've become busy. I've been requested a lot compared to the other volunteers, mainly by the elderly or younger women, who often request me simply to chat or do simple tasks.
"My granddaughter is learning sign language just like you. She wants to be a doctor after being here so often. You think you can help her when she visits me next time?" Before I could respond, the older woman had already moved on to her new topic. "Have you heard, little Ignis? The whole city has been talking about it. It's all over every newsstand." Shaking my head, she smiled brightly, probably finding excitement in finally finding someone who didn't know.
"Two weeks ago, a young girl, around 13, was sent here with broken bones and fractures. She was found in an alley street in the city next door. Apparently, she wasn't accepted at the hospital; I wonder who she pissed off." The last bit was more said to herself but the memory of the multiple people surrounding a stretcher came to mind.
Throughout the day, I've been hearing nothing but the story. Some even sound exaggerated, to the point of being comical. However, I cast it aside because it wasn't my business and paid more attention to playing a game similar to chess with an older man.