Everyone around me coughed while I grinned like a mischievous child. There was a long pause.
"Ok," said Jun Sihao into the long and awkward silence, allowing me to release a breath of relief. I had been worried that I might irritate him more than anything else. He wheeled himself out the room.
"Yina," Aunty Jun patted my hand with some concern and bit her lip as if in guilt. "How are you feeling?"
"I'm pretty sure I've been better," I scratched my nose, but then looked the couple square in the face with serious solemnity. "Aunty, Uncle, please promise me to never, ever drug me or my hubby again. I can forgive you guys for it this time - Sihao explained it to me, but I won't forgive you if it ever happens again. You don't ever need to drug me. Please just talk to me next time. I'm a virtuously patient-to-a-fault doormat, remember? So do please consider that in all likelihood, I'll agree if you ask me to do something unless it crosses my bottom line."
"What would cross your bottom line then?" Uncle Jun after a a few breaths.
"Forcing me to get in bed with Siming while I'm still married to Sihao," I said. "I'm a loyal girl. Forcing me to cuckold my husband will be crossing my bottom line and then I'll be out of here. As you have seen, my world dominating husband has beyond amazing prowess. There is no way I'm not going to eventually get pregnant with how strong his hose sprays. So no matter how Siming may pine for his best friend, I am not ever going to let him touch me."
"Unless you divorce Sihao," Uncle Jun said with a nod to himself.
"Hey, hey," I sat up straighter in alarm. "Uncle, don't even think of it or go there. I'm with Sihao whether he gets better, is impotent or not. That's what marriage is for. For better or worse. In sickness or health until death do us part, or so the vows I haven't said go."
"No, Yina, you misunderstand," Uncle Jun shook his head and pointed in the direction of his study room. "The contract you signed last night is to marry Sihao unless he can't get you pregnant. But it's not a legal marriage. This is just between our families. The agreement is for you to give birth to our next generation of children to carry on our family bloodline. Sihao was injured in that area during the accident. The doctors can't guarantee that his sperm will still swim. And so if you don't get pregnant, Siming will be expected to do the deed. Your parents already sent you for all the relevant checkups last year, so we know that you shouldn't have any problems on your end. If you refuse to let Siming touch you while married to Sihao, then we'll just change the contract documents to Siming's name so that Siming will have a chance."
"What if something happens to Siming?" I asked in a faint voice, not quite believing what I was hearing. So that's what the full health checkup my parents insisted I do last year was for. That meant this plan had been in the works for more than a year already. "Not that anything is going to happen to him, but what if?"
Uncle Jun cleared his throat and puffed out his chest, but didn't say anything. Aunty Jun looked to one side with a hand over her mouth.
I swallowed. I got it. If the boys failed, it'd be up to Uncle Jun to do the deed. They were going to make me pregnant in any way they could in order to see babies. My parents really had well and truly sold me, hadn't they?
"Ok. Don't answer that then," I said in a thick voice, glancing around the room to find Geannie and Dr Feng trying to stay unnoticed in the corner.
"It's in the contract you signed," Uncle Jun said. "Your parents have a copy. You've already agreed."
"While under the influence," I added, "which would then cause the contract to not be admissible in a court of law."
Uncle Jun looked at Aunty Jun.
"I thought you said she was easy to talk to and persuade? And here she is talking back to her elders," he grumbled.
"You have to agree," Aunty Jun told me with a tense expression. "You have no other choice. Otherwise we will cut the cooperation we have with your family and cause the two families to fall out with each other."
"So," I looked down at my white knuckles that were gripping my blankets harder than I expected, "I suppose I won't be getting my fancy wedding ceremony, won't get to see my teary eyed father giving me away to a smiling groom, won't get to exchange vows with the man of my dreams, won't get a wedding reception and wedding cake, and I won't even get a wedding ring. Right?" I asked in a small voice and tried but failed to keep my voice from wobbling. "Everyone in our circle will know that I've become a laughingstock, sold and abandoned by my parents to become your slave and baby making machine. I won't ever be properly married."
"Don't make everything out to be more awful than it is. It's not like that at all. You'll get your wedding ring," Aunty Jun put a hand over mine, giving me a tight smile and glancing at Uncle Jun. "Don't worry."
"I'm - I'm glad," I said, clearing my increasingly tight throat and starting to realise what a big hole my parents had decided to bury me in. "Thank you."
"Our family has strict rules of conduct for our women," Uncle Jun told me. "I'll allow your misbehaviour and rudeness to slide for now. The drugging and your injuries are our fault. We apologise for that. But in the future, you are expected to wait on your husband and serve your parents with all respect and etiquette."
"Whoa, hold on there, Uncle Jun. You do realise we're not living in any ancient Chinese dynasty here, right? It's the twenty-first century. You still want to uphold all the old rules and traditions?" I held up a hand. "No way. You guys already know that I'm a laid-back rebel who barely toes any lines. Me and Siming are practically brothers."
"And so, the two of you will learn," Uncle Jun gave me an unpleasant smile. "It's about time you both grew up and were taught a lesson."
"Uncle Jun," I cleared my throat again, feeling my voice starting to rise in pitch and decrescendo with my ever tightening throat. "Did anyone ever tell you that you've changed?"
"Duaghter-in-law, you are calling your father-in-law by the wrong title," Uncle Jun said in a warning voice. He turned toward the door. "Where's the tea?" he bellowed, making everyone in the room jump.
"Coming, coming," Siming rushed in with a tray containing a teapot and four tea cups. "Yina, you know what to do for the tea ceremony right?" he said in a low voice, setting the tray down on the bedside table. "Please don't make a fuss now. Don't make Dad any madder."
I blinked back the tears in my eyes and swallowed, giving him a small nod. Taking a deep breath, I slid out of bed in my thin nightgown and squeaked in pain when my weak and soft legs gave way beneath me. Nevermind, Uncle Jun probably preferred for me to do this on my knees anyway.