- Aaahhh! - I woke up to a loud, sustained scream.
Fuck... what happened? I turned back to the girl - she was lying facing me, and she didn't take her eyes off me.
- Well, go ahead, tell her I'm scary and that you're terrified of me, - I got up from the bed, - but let me remind you, we're not going to work this way, - I rolled my eyes, disappointed that my long drug-induced sleep had been interrupted.
- I was having a nightmare. Or don't you know nightmares?
- You people are hopeless, - I collapsed back onto the bed, - don't you know that sleep can be controlled? - covering my eyes with my forearm, I tried to get my sleep back.
- You skroges are insensitive.
- You're playing that insensitive crap again, aren't you? - I mumbled in a slurred voice.
- It's an obvious fact, everyone knows that.
- You piss me off.
I covered my head with the pillow, still hoping to fall asleep again. But it seemed too late-if I woke up, I wouldn't be able to go back to sleep for the next twelve hours.
- Tell me, if I leave here, will you open your veins again?
- I was given some medicine yesterday. Don't you remember?
Yes, I do. Shit, she can't hurt herself now... bad. After being in the same room with her for 24 hours, I realized that a cold cell isn't the worst punishment. At least it's quiet and has a nice view of outer space.
- I've got some bad news for you.
- Like it could be worse than being under your supervision.
- I don't know if it could be worse. But even if I wanted to rescue you from this captivity, I couldn't.
- Why not?
- I can't get you into a brothel, you fool, - I laughed, throwing my head back.
The girl got mad again, and started pounding on the glass.
- Why are you freaking out? Are you offended by the fact that I can make a whore out of you in theory, or by the fact that you can't become one because of your temper?
If I were to "save" her in that way, she's not really suited to the role, she's too stroppy. She'd only be to Yenel's liking. That's not so bad for her, though, she'll be a hedonist like him. Ugh, what's going through my head?
- You're disgusting. That's why you don't have any women.
- There's one right in front of me. And I think she kind of liked me.
- I see. What did you take in there? Cayan acid, that's what you call it, right?
- You know why I thought that?
- Why?
- Because, unfortunately for me, you're talking to me.
- I'd talk to anyone if I were you!
- Yeah? Well, talk to yourself.
I decided to go out for a while, locking the door to the room, and, just in case, to the latrine. Even with her newfound regeneration, it was best not to take any unnecessary risks. At least for those fifteen minutes... I left the observation room and headed away from the sector. The only thing worse would be if there were two of them. I'd be in for a whole lot of trouble. I got on the elevator, and arrived at the first floor, the entertainment room for the lower staff. But the only entertainment is a refrigerator full of substances and a computer with artificial intelligence. Ah, Cindy, the woman of my dreams... you always understand me, even though you are a pathetic piece of software code that is at this moment corresponding with my neighbor. Cindy was a huge pile of obsolete scrap metal hanging from the ceiling, ten monitors sticking out of it, with cushioned seating in front of them. Sit on the ottoman, stare at the monitor. In the best human tradition. Cindy hasn't been updated lately, so she's been getting fewer and fewer clients. Tonight, I'm all alone. I grabbed a bottle of Jupiterian drink from the fridge and sat down on one of the seats, turning on the system. In a sweet, thin voice, the computer said:
- Cindy 2.0. Virtual wife. Download in progress. Please hold.
- Come on, I don't have much time.
- Upload complete.
- I'm glad you got a shorter download time.
- Ahh... it's you, Kserd, - her voice immediately changed to a much colder and lower one.
- Hello, my love. Did you break up with your boyfriends?
Cindy used to be able to communicate only if I typed something directly into the keyboard. But now she's been upgraded, and all I have to do is talk as if she's a live person right in front of me. She's considered an old, boring AI, though: her much more compact and advanced sister, Gloria, stands on the top floor where the ship's captain rests.
- Did I mention you're a rare idiot?
I didn't much like it when she was rude, and often sent reports. However, each time I was assured that "Cindy customizes to her client, no exceptions". Developers never listen to their audience...
- And you're a walking piece of program code that's long overdue for an update. But I accept you as you are.
- What do you want? - she said in an even more robotic voice.
- I don't know, honey. Humor me.
Cindy displayed an erotic image of a woman in a shirt.
- Damn it, Cindy! - I choked up, - Can we do something shirtless tonight? Please. The computer only laughed its computer laugh, making a sixteen-bit "peca-face" on the monitor.
- Entertain yourself, loser, - Cindy said in the same soulless voice.
- It's like you're all conspiring to make fun of me.
- I'm sorry, I'm sorry, Kserd. You know the Morale add-on fixes don't come out for another week. Do you really think I broke up with my, as you call them, boyfriends because of you?
- You need a complete makeover, you're no different than my defective prisoner.
- What prisoner? Did you get a job? - Cindy put up a picture of a skroge kicking a penis on the monitor.
- I turned off the monitor and reopened the refrigerator, finding that all the Cayan dope was gone. But I was out of artecidin, which gave me a fierce head rush, complete with euphoria. I went up to my floor and returned to the observation room. Lya was lying with her back against the door. Did she fall asleep?
- Are you asleep?
Yeah, I guessed. She got up reluctantly and looked at me from under her long bangs. Oh, God, I've ruined it for myself. Now she's gonna talk again.
- She was asleep.
- Well, you can, carry on, - I collapsed on the bed, starting to inject the drug.
- Are all you guards so lazy?
- What do you mean?
- Well, it seems to me that your job is to take drugs and watch hallucinations. Am I wrong?
- It's just that I have you all to myself right now.
She looked at me confused.
- I mean, one test subject for me to keep an eye on.
- Oh, okay.
- What did you think?
- I didn't think anything. Didn't you tell me to shut up?
- I did.
- Junkie... - she whispered, turning around, but my keen hearing picked it up.
- I heard it.
- So what's in it for me? I can't get any worse. For your information, your rapist is no longer a threat to me.
- Warten? Huh, I never called him a threat. To you, my voice was starting to sound sluggish.
- Listen.
- What? Honey, do you know what artecidin does?
- Don't call me that.
- Oh, I'm sorry. I was talking to Cindy before you.
The drug started to take effect, giving me an overwhelming euphoric and happy feeling.
- Tell me about yourself. You have a story, don't you?
- A story? What do you want to know?
Is it me talking or is it the drug inside me? What kind of story can I have? It's all war, blood, sex, and trying to get some love from someone. The girl's messing with me.
- So, how did your life start? What was the first thing you saw?
- Why would you do that, woman...
Lya sighed heavily, and I could hear it through the glass.
- Listen. I... in a way, you're all I have left. I have nothing and no one else. Is it wrong that I'm trying to find out something about you? - she said in an indignant tone, trying not to meet my gaze.
I wondered. What was the first thing I saw? Good question...
- Well, here it would be more correct to say what I felt... I remember a blurry picture. The fuzzy dark green outline of a typical lab. I breathed... liquid for a while. Then... I started to choke.
She listened with interest. Not like the rest of the human women, not to placate me. She was genuinely interested, like I was some kind of deity.
- And then what?
- And then... that liquid was drained. I took my first breath, and I felt pain. It's the first thing I've ever felt in my life. Is that what you wanted to know?
Remembering and telling it to her, I could literally see it all over again.
- You were never a child?
- What on Earth do you teach? I was never a child. I've always been the way you see me now. Well, maybe a little thinner.
- I think I'm beginning to understand. You were created in a laboratory.
- Bingo. Maybe I overreacted and you're not so stupid.
- You never had a mother?
- A mother? No, I never had a mother. I didn't have a father in the way that other races are used to.
- I see... that's why you're so callous.
Her reasoning irritated me.
- You haven't seen the others.
- I have. But, yes... they're the same. Almost.
- Almost?
- Yeah. Well, you know, you're...
- Shut up. Stop it. I'm getting so high right now, and you're in my way.
The girl's crying. Human women are so hard to deal with. Maybe I should bite her. And say she died from the substance she injected earlier? No one would even check.
- Listen, do you want this to end here and now?
- What do you mean? - she's backed up against the wall, hugging her knees.
- Look... I'm a viper. It's not just a pretty boy for you.
- Stupid. I didn't think you were.
You didn't? Oh, I don't care. She's a fool, what can she do?
- Anyway, I can kill you in an instant just by biting you. Would you like that?
- No!
- I don't understand you. Five hours ago you were slitting your wrists. Think about it, it's a lot more satisfying than lying in your own pool of caked blood. I won't hurt you. Come on.
There was an erotic fantasy among Vipers about biting a human woman. It's considered top flight to bite a girl without letting the poison inside her. And for the first time in my life, I wasn't aiming to get any erotic pleasure out of it.
- Idiot, - her words were at odds with her gestures and actions.
She sobbed, slumping against the wall and covering herself with her shirt. It looked like she was really afraid of death. Then why slit her wrists?
- Okay. I'm not going to insist... - I couldn't get away from the high.
Bad thoughts were going through my head. It was like I knew what she was feeling.
- You're not like... - She couldn't find the words, her eyes racing.
- I don't look like anyone, stupid.
- Anyway... it just doesn't matter. Are those scientists of yours coming to see me soon?
- I don't know. They could be here now. They could come tomorrow. What's the big deal? I'm having my tenth dream.
- No, you're not. For example, we humans don't talk at all when we sleep.
- You don't talk? Do you do drugs a lot?
- No, not often.
- Why not?
- Well, we're too different. Even though you're descended from humans, but still... we're addicted to it on a bodily level, people often die from it.
That made me laugh for some reason - I really didn't know much about human physiology.
- Really? You can die from drugs or be physically addicted?
- Imagine that! You're addicted!
- I'm not an addict, I'm just bored with you, so I have as much fun as I can. I told you to shut up, you're pissing me off.
- Is that why you're talking to me? That's a weird concept.
- Is this a marathon of stupid questions?
- If you want to call it that, call it that.
I think I managed to shut the girl up for a while. My eyes couldn't see a clear picture of the room at all, everything was blurring and blending together. What the hell? I've never had that before. Not even from artecidin.
- Are you okay?
- Oh, I've never felt better. I can't see your stupid face.
- I can see yours, - she laughed, - It's like you're in nirvana.
- Shut up. I hear stomping.
- What kind?
At that moment two soldiers came in. I got out of bed, struggling to focus my eyes.
- What do you want?
- Open the door to her.
- Okay, - I pressed the button, thankful that my hands remembered where it was. The soldiers went inside, scaring the girl to death.
Was this really all I was going to do on this ship? Pushing buttons and chiseling dope while entertaining human women with idle chatter? They underestimate me. No, they don't. Something's gotta be done about that. The soldiers were yelling at Lya, grabbing her by the hair and throwing her against the wall. At least that's what I imagined when I heard her screaming. But I wasn't thinking or registering anything anymore. Absolutely nothing. They were pointing their machine guns at her, then pulling them away. Then pointing again... I heard the sound of gunshots, and more than one. I was extremely uncomfortable hearing it... then they took the syringe out of the suitcase again and injected something into her without responding to her pleas. My stomach was twisting, I wanted to say stop, stop! You will never make a uterus, never! No matter how strong a man you get. Why this waste of bullets? Why this waste of resources and time? Why this suffering?! I don't know how much time has passed. Half an hour? An hour? Or maybe more? They went out, and I thought they were mocking me at the door. They were saying he'd lost his shit. Nasty things, and they used to be afraid of me. But it doesn't matter. I'm not the boss anymore. I can't influence anything. I'm nobody.
I don't know how much time passed, but I started to come to my senses, and the picture in front of my eyes was restored.
- Lya... Lya?
Lya was sitting on the floor, staring at one point and rocking back and forth. But she remained as seemingly unharmed as last time. And she didn't answer me. Something inside me prickled, making me nauseous as I tried to imagine myself in her shoes.
- Kill me, - she whispered, but I heard her.
- You... you said an emphatic no.
- Kill me, kill me! - she screamed almost to the point of tears.
Something dragged me to the girl, I opened the doors and stood over her for a while, looking into her blue eyes.
- What are you waiting for?!
And really, what am I waiting for? I can do this. I suggested it to her myself. Why not? I leaned over her, holding her against my chest. After thinking for a moment, I sank my sharp fangs into her neck, holding her down. She moaned in pain, begging for the fangs to be pulled out. I didn't want to torture her an extra minute.
- It'll be over now, - I whispered in her ear.
But the girl just flapped her eyes, looking disappointedly at me and then away.
- You said you could... come on. Please... you're not like them, you're not, Kserd!
- The shot they injected must have given the effect of immunity to poisons, - I only stated the fact confusedly.
It's strange that she survived the shots. Ninety percent of test subjects end up that way, but not her. Lya lay in my arms, unharmed, seeming to be in only pain with no obvious physical damage. It's not easy being human...
- If my poison didn't work, - I still couldn't believe it, -then you'll die, but not from your wounds. And not from the poison, - I said, almost whispering.
- Please don't leave me. You can still do it... try it again, you're sure to succeed!
I didn't want to admit that she was slowly turning into a creature like me, and in such a short time. After thinking for a while, I bit her again, injecting a large dose of poison. Her neck turned black and blood flowed from the four bite holes, but it stopped very quickly.
- You can't kill me?
The effects of the drug wore off, and I came to my senses.
- I couldn't help it now, - I left her lying on the floor without another word.