I felt myself dive into the Light Side of the Force. This time it was different to the Dark Side. I knew that this was a vision or one of the ways it could go, should I choose the Light Side. I began to once again see my family. I came to understand that instead of falling victim to my hate, I searched for peace and found a way to process my loss. This led me to the Light Side of the Force. I became the very first Jedi. I became the one to guide those who searched for peace of mind. I would go around healing and settling disputes.
I saw myself dedicate myself to the will of the Force and began to preach calmness, and peace and detached myself from everyone. I was alone again. I walked my path alone, fighting the 'good' fight against those who took their anger and hate out on others, the Sith.
I created an order and taught others about what I knew. I wanted to spread this peace through the universe. But as it happens, my teachings were also abused and used to reach other conclusions. The Dark Jedi or Sith were created. Wars broke out between the Jedi and the Sith and I had to watch those close to me die over and over again. I focused solely on the Light Side of the Force and tried not to be affected by their deaths. I continued to train, die and be reborn only to do it all over again.
When the time came to fight against the Sith, I was the first to do that. I willingly sacrificed myself for others to live. When the Sith, Darth Vitiate rose to power, I was the Jedi Grandmaster who led my fellow Jedi into the fight against the Emperor and died, killing both him and managing to give my life, so that his children return from their darkness and find the light.
With each reincarnation I not only grew more powerful, but I taught others my wisdom. I tried to bring peace and happiness wherever I went. I helped the poor with getting food, through the Force. I would use 'Plant Surge' to channel my life energy into the plants, using this to accelerate their growth and give food to those who need it. I rose to become Jedi Grandmasters over and over again and in each reincarnation, I was more powerful than in the last. I tried to find wisdom about the Force and delved deeper into the Light Side the longer I lived.
I came to understand that the Galactic Republic system was flawed and that politics furthered corruption. I was against this system, but my voice alone didn't carry enough weight. My fellow Jedi wanted to enjoy some of the peace they fought so hard for. And when the Sith were thought to be destroyed in the last big battle, they were happy. They put down their guard and even created a Jedi Temple on Coruscant on top of the Sith one.
I told them that it wouldn't work. I told them that this would lead to disaster and that we couldn't stay the way we were for millennia. They wouldn't listen. I continued my journey through the galaxy and tried to show others the benefits of the Light Side of the Force. I healed and helped those in need. But in the end ... it was all for nothing.
.
The longer I lived and the more reincarnation I went through, I came to understand that it wasn't what I wanted. It was still ... wrong. Users of the Light Side take something from the Force, exactly like the users of the Dark Side. Both of them are wrong though. Both sides are fundamentally flawed in their beliefs.
The light side was aligned with calmness, peace, and passiveness and was used only for knowledge and defence. The Jedi were notable practitioners of the light, being selfless servants of the will of the Force. They were servants and I am no servant. I am myself and will always be myself. There can be no peace without being ready for war. Those two things sadly go hand in hand. Calmness is something that either follows or comes before chaos and stress. The idea of sealing away our feelings to achieve complete selflessness is stupid.
Locking away your feelings means you give up what makes you alive. Having no feelings is akin to being a robot and that is not something that I will ever be. The same thing is wrong with the Dark Side. They let themselves be controlled by their feelings. Anger, hate and fear are good to have, but if you let yourself go and lose yourself in them, it is destructive. Those who use the Dark Side of the Force take something from the Force as well. The fact that they use their powers is proof of that.
.
So the only way to use the Force correctly is to simply not choose a side at all. Why would I care about the tree branch when I can simply use the entire trunk? The trunk is the Force as a whole. Of course, there are different branches of the Force, but in the end, they're both the same ... the Force. I might be the only being in existence who has the privilege of effectively using the Force without taking something from it forcefully.
I have a form of 'relationship' with the Force. As long as life exists, so long will the Force exist as well. And I will always exist. I also came to understand that the reason why my Midi-chlorians are increasing with each reincarnation is due to my immortality. It is influenced by my mind. And my mind and experience is something that is tied to my soul. Since I am truly immortal, I will always keep the skills I have acquired. I only have to build up muscle memory again, but the skills stay.
That is why the longer I live and the more reincarnations I go through, I will grow stronger in the Force. And the Force won't ever be able to take that away from me, because taking that away from me, would be a form of death of identity and that doesn't work on me. I will stay myself as that is who I am.
.
I woke up again. I let my new understanding linger a moment. The Force waited for my decision as well. The Force put me through this to both show me parts of itself and see my reaction to what she shows me. I don't judge the Force for these two aspects of it. I don't care about them. What I do care about is that I will not be controlled or used. I am not a slave to the Force or my feelings.
The key word is, control.
I told my stance and my findings to the Force in another meditation. And she was ... happy about that. Those who believe themselves superior and use one side of the Force are wrong and only know half of the truth. I will continue to listen and talk to the Force and whenever it wants to, it can teach me something about itself which I could then use. Unlike others, I understand that using the Force has limitless uses. You only need enough understanding and a strong mind.
But I won't rush anything. All in due time.
.
.
I stood up from my meditative position after that. Thanks to my perfect memory and infinite storage, I knew how much time had passed. It had been over 1200 years since I began this meditative session. My first try at using the Force resulted in me getting insight into not only the Force but myself as well.
Standing up, proved to be hard. My muscles had a lot of strength for some reason, even though I never did any exercise all these years. I was as thin as a stick but I was still strong. I used telekinesis to stand up. I used a while until I could stand properly again. But when I could I started to move. I wanted to see the small settlement I came from all those years ago.
To my surprise it was indeed abandoned. There was nothing of it left. All the humans had perished here and the planet was now uninhabited. This surprised me as it was what I had seen in my vision but to be true after all ... that was surprising. I thought about what to do now. As I was thinking about it, I heard a screech and looked up into the air.
*SCREEE*
I saw a big eagle with black and white feathers flying overhead. I don't know why but I instinctively knew that this was my eagle. The eagle dived and landed on my shoulder. As soon as he landed, we formed a deep bond. I could tell that it wasn't a normal eagle but instead a Force-sensitive one. He could use the force similarly to the way I could.
[Picture]
The eagle was a glorious animal. He had black and white feathers, indicating the balance that he represented. I was a similar case. I knew that balance was the key to the Force. But I was still a bit different. I wouldn't bother with the branches. I was only interested in the trunk. The Force itselff. So when someone asks me what side of the Force I am on, I will tell them, neitherr. I simply use the Force. The pure Force.
Something is considered a Dark Side technique? Who decided that? Those are things that the Jedi say but not something I or the Force agreed on. I won't limit myself in any way.
.
I went back to the desert and decided to try out some of the things that I learnt in this millenia. As I delved deep into myself I found out that my Midi-chlorian amount had increased again. It had reached over 5'000 per cell. This was probably due to the energy that my Midi-chlorians 'ate' constantly. So I began to use what the Force already showed me.
The Force was my teacher and I was the listener, the student who only did what the teacher said. I was in no hurry at all. The Force began to talk to me again and tell me things that it wanted me to do and uses of itself that it wanted me to master. I took everything it gave me and trained. I started with basics, that was the senses and movement.
I would blind myself with the rag that was on my body and would begin to sense the world around me in the beginning. I was used to meditation, so this came relatively easy to me. I didn't stop training until I could do what the Force wished for me. I could use the Force like a radar to sense my surroundings. I could feel the earth and every little stone. Walking was easy this way. It gave me a form of 3D view that reminded me greatly of Observation Haki from One Piece.
With this first sense unlocked, the Force showed me to feel different presences. Again this reminded me of Observation Haki. Since the Force was in everything that was alive, it was a very powerful sense to gain. So I did just that.
.
This way many years passed. The Force would teach me something and I would train until I master it. We went over sense, then movement and then even telekinesis. I did everything and as time passed, my bond with the Force deepened and with it my understanding. It was a great time honestly. I was unbothered by anything. I could do what I whished and talk to the Force to know what was happening in the universe. The Force told me that I will be able to sense the entire universe as well some day and that it had many plans for me.
I trained in many different areas and spent time with my eagle. We went to meet different creatures who were indigenous to this planet. It was a good time. But at some point, I came to understand that progress was slowing down. My talent and the amount of Midi-chlorians was hindering me a bit. So I decided that it would be best for me to simply start again. The Force told me that at some point, the amount of Midi-chlorians wouldn't matter anymore and I would be able to forget them, but for now, it was still important.
So I willingly died and reincarnated again.