And then, he found himself reborn again, just a little before the timeline he had been previously thrown into. And again. And again. And again...
As he became increasingly entangled in this repeating cycle of rebirth, the same desperation that haunted the previous Lysander gradually seeped into him. The desperation to safeguard his family's name at any cost.
It was a name for which his parents had sacrificed their lives, and his sister, whom he had known for a brief period in his initial rebirth, had met her demise in the quest to maintain its dignity. He was aware that his grandparents had also fought relentlessly to keep it alive during times of decline.
Now, it fell upon him to save it and uphold its honour. Yet, with each attempt, he faced brutal death for the sake of this legacy. Over time, weariness set in.
"Have I not endured enough? Suffered enough for the sake of this house and this title?"
He found himself yearning for death at this point. Life had become so exhaustingly draining, leaving him spiritually, mentally, and physically depleted long ago. The relentless cycle of rebirth initially terrified him.
Gradually, he noticed a pattern—each reincarnation brought health consequences, starting mildly and occurring long after the rebirth. At first, he dismissed it as a sickness, but over time, the consequences intensified with each rebirth, and their manifestation drew closer to the beginning of the timeline.
Now, he found himself reborn in the timeline before the female lead's rebirth, and this time, it felt different. The consequences were harsher, and he believed it might be his last reincarnation, or at most, the second last.
Despite the uncertainty, he was convinced that the consequences would surface more frequently than in his previous rebirths.
He clung to a hopeful theory that the escalating consequences accompanying each reincarnation were a countdown to the end of his life. While each reincarnation offered a chance to alter the course of events, the price or consequences extracted grew increasingly severe.
So he wanted to believe it was his last life in this hellish world. He had previously never died from these because he was assassinated or killed before that.
This time, his life would be short considering his health, also, it was some time before the female lead reincarnated so he could feel somewhat safe and make hasty preparations to leave this shitshow and at least enjoy this little time and make it about himself, for himself and by himself.
He was tired and he did not have much of a life left in him anyway, he hoped his dead family could understand.
He too had cared for the house and family name a lot and had managed to at least save it in every timeline by placing an heir he adopted or leaving the family in the hands of the only three people in this place that he wholeheartedly trusted.
He pondered, recalling the numerous times he was killed trying to safeguard his family name. In many instances, his efforts were in vain, and the Emperor obliterated his house.
This time, he craved a bit of selfishness, a chance to enjoy this brief respite just for himself. Lysander couldn't predict if his family name would endure, as it was always a precarious gamble in every life, yielding unpredictable outcomes.
Thinking was becoming unbearable. There was a twinge in his heart, releasing the attachment, but more than that, he was now prepared to relinquish it all in this particular timeline.
From his recollections, Lysander was confident that if his family were aware of the challenges he faced, they wouldn't condemn him for his choices. Given his late elder sister's character, she might have insisted he relinquish the title if it meant preserving his well-being.
Despite his readiness to depart discreetly and avoid attracting any attention, it seemed the universe had other plans for him, subjecting him to the presence of two particularly troublesome individuals.