Chapter 15 - Chapter 15 - Be mine

Jaxon's POVI'm standing at the top of the stairs with my mom who has prepared a nice night for me and Esme with snacks and drinks."She's in the kitchen with Finley now""She has settled in a bit better now, hasn't she? And Finley's doing good with training""He sure is. I think he uses training as an excuse to use all his pent-up anger and emotions he's had to hold back which makes it difficult because he hasn't shifted yet and he's got a great deal of strength on him""He will learn to manage it all better. You boys are doing good for them. I'm proud of you and it's also nice to see you not so serious"While talking to my mom I hear Esme call me a jackass for having her go downstairs.'I'm not a jackass. And my ass is fine but thanks for checking it out.' I'm instantly laughing when I hear her coughing and laughing in amusement."What happened there?" My mom asks while smiling at me." I just got called a jackass. That's what" I tell her and she's instantly laughing and patting my shoulder while walking away.Not 5 minutes later I see Esme making her way up the stairs looking awfully red."I'm sorry Alpha"Woah....why is she apologising to me for?"What you sorry for?""I insulted you," she says while avoiding my gaze."Come on don't worry about it. I have something to show you. Fin and my mom helped with this and I'm probably going to regret letting you choose what show we watch but hey let's go"She smiles and walks behind me. I so badly want to hold her hand and have her in front of me but I've only just got her to properly talk to me and enjoy my company.We walk into my room and she stands at the doorway I think waiting for me to let her in."Come on you don't need to stand there."All alpha, beta and gammas rooms are sound proof so whenever we are with people no one else can hear it which is good.She walks into my room a little nervously and she sees that I have Netflix on the screen."I've only just noticed that you're not in a suit. How come?" She asks me like it's news to anyone."I don't always wear one. Well, I do but when I'm in my room or not at work I like to wear my casual clothes" I tell her and she seems to visibly relax a little which is good."So I'm going to fetch some popcorn because I'm really hungry tonight and you choose what you want us to watch okay""Okay," she says. She's really beginning to warm up to me I think which is good.Once I return I see she's put the vampire diaries on. Season 1 Episode 1 and she's sat on the chair at my desk waiting for me."You want to join me on here?"She nods in agreement and she's sat on the bed with me while we start watching TV. I want to talk with her tonight about the mate's situation but I'm worried she's been permanently damaged from Alpha Dylan.She's happy watching the Show whereas I'm happy watching her. She just doesn't know how I feel yet."Esme can we talk" - Great...I just jump straight onto it. Idiot."I've been waiting for this don't worry I've mentally prepared myself""You need to look at me sweetheart," I tell her. She looks at me and she looks as if she's about to cry. But why is she about to cry? I don't get it."Alpha Jaxon, don't worry. I've been rejected before I'll be okay""Woah...hold up there. you think that's why I need to talk to you?" I ask her. A little upset but I don't let on with it."Isn't that why you wanted to talk to me? Because I'm not cut out to be your Mate nor am I strong enough to be?""It's really not. I wanted to talk to you because I want you to accept me and Blaze. I should have officially started with that so I am sorry" I tell her. I'm staring right at her but she won't look at me. I move closer to her and I'm mere inches away from her.I hold her chin softly, and I get her to look at me. She does and she doesn't seem to have any expression on her face I'm beginning to doubt this."I want you. Esme West, I want you to be my mate and my Luna. Do you accept me and Blaze""She stares at me like I've grown horns on my head and I don't get another word in because she's bolted it out of the door to my room."Esme...wait"'smart move cowboy' Blaze says in my head while prancing around.'what are you still doing here? Go to her. Tell her you're serious. Alana's great by the way. Cheers for asking ''I have no time for your wolf to be horny Blaze'I'm running down the hall when my mom stops me."Woah...what are you running for? Didn't I teach you that running in hallways is dangerous young man?" She asks while drinking her tea."Esme. I asked her to be my mate, I asked her to accept me and Blaze but it all came out wrong. Mom, I hope I haven't screwed this up""Oh, darling. It probably spooked her a bit. She's probably not used to being loved and wanted by someone and I'm sure she wants to but she might feel like you're joking to her. She's had a lifetime of misery and she's only ever known one male to stand by her side. She needs you to be honest with her not let Blaze prance around and take control okay"Mom really knows how to settle a situation."Thanks, mom." I kiss her on her head and she reminds me to be gentle...like aren't I always?I get to her room and I can hear her crying. I didn't mean to upset her."Esme, can I come in"No answer"Please. It all came out wrong just let me explain""Doors open," she says. My heart pounding in my chest if it carries on I feel like it's going to fall out anytime now." I'm so sorry for how that came out. I get it's a lot to take in and I didn't want to scare you. I wanted to talk to you about it because I didn't want to reject you. I want you by my side. And we haven't got to go all out yet and let everyone know. I wanted you to get used to me""I am getting used to you Alpha. I fear rejection again, I fear being let down and hurt again. I had to watch someone else with another girl because I wasn't good enough. What would happen if you met someone else? What happens to me then?""Nothing happens to you. You're my mate. I'm your second chance at love and I want to be that person for you. I want to be your protector and your smile""But why?" She asks while sobbing a little."Because I want and love you. You were made for me. I'm going to try this again. And this time I'll make it so that I don't make a twat of myself okay""I, Alpha Jaxon Hayes, Alpha of the midnight pack, would like you, Esme West to be my Mate and My Luna. To be by your side every day. Do you accept my request"This is it. This is where my heart fully falls out of my chest and I just hope to god she can't hear it."You must be nervous," she says while smiling at me"Your wolf is a snitch too you know. And your heart is pounding in your chest and you're worried"'You arse' I tell Blaze in a huff.