"Answer my question, Nad!" Dara shouted with teary eyes.
My whole body felt weak when I heard Dara's shout. Why did she have to find out this secret in this way?
"Answer me, Nad. If you're my best friend, why would you lie about such a big secret?" she cried, starting to break down.
"Sorry, Ra," I said softly as I bowed my head.
"Why you, Nad? Why would you do that to me? Am I the only one here who doesn't know about your marriage to Niko? Am I the only one who looks stupid for not knowing what everyone else knows?"
"I didn't mean to lie to you, Ra. I . . . ."
Plakk. . . she suddenly slapped me hard on the cheek. Seeing Dara's attitude like this, I was so surprised and so shocked. I felt like I looked so despicable in front of her. But, I guess I deserved all of this.
"I'm disappointed with you, Nad. I'm disappointed in you!" she shouted and left. However, when Dara was about to leave, she accidentally bumped into Niko who was looking at the two of us.
When I saw Niko's face, I couldn't bear to look at him for so long. I was so embarrassed, I could only turn my face away and shed my tears with this unexpected event.
Dara was staring at Niko's face. Her tears continued to flow, I could see from the look on her face that she looked very disappointed. If I were Dara, I would definitely feel disappointed like her. This short happiness, is it going to end just like that?
"Congratulations on your wedding," she said softly.
"Are you okay?" Niko asked, looking at Dara's face.
"Is this your payback to me after all the years I've put our relationship on hold?"
"I don't mean to avenge what happened so long ago. I just want you to give me a moment."
"For what? To feel what it's like to be betrayed?" she cried, causing Niko to bow his head in guilt.
"To find the answer to what I think is very difficult for me to answer," he replied while looking at Dara's face.
"Did you find the answer?"
Niko nodded slowly and looked at Dara's face with teary eyes.
"I wish you happiness," he said softly and left.
Dara's departure seemed to be ruining the relationship we had built up over the past few years. Would we ever be happy after what happened today? Could I still be with Niko and still be friends with Dara? Is this the ending we wanted?
"What should we do now? Is this what you wanted?" I asked quietly and looked at Niko's face.
"It's not the ending I wanted, Nad. But, I'm grateful that Dara finally found out about our secret."
"Even in this way?" I said sarcastically. Niko lowered his head. Not daring to look me in the face. "Why didn't you pursue Dara's departure?"
"For what? To explain everything? To fix everything?"
"Don't you love Dara," I said softly.
Niko seemed to be upset by what I just said. I felt sorry for saying that to him. It hurt, but I had to stay strong to face this bitter reality.
"What do you know about love? Why have you only talked about my feelings for Dara for so long? Do you really want me to be with her?" he shouted which made me reflexively shed my tears again and stare at Niko's face sharply.
"Yes, I want you to be with Dara. Didn't you guys love each other all along? You want to be together forever, right? So, why are you still here?" I shouted, lost in emotion.
"So that's what you want? You want me to be with him?"
"Yes, that's what I want."
Stupid! Really stupid. Why did I even say that? I don't want Niko to get back together with Dara. But, why are those words coming out of my mouth? It doesn't match what I've been feeling.
"Nad, have you ever questioned my feelings for you?" he asked suddenly with a serious expression on his face.
"What do you mean?"
"Don't always think you're the one who feels oppressed and suffers the most. I'm also the victim of feelings here. You, me and Dara are all suffering from the feelings that have shackled us all this time. These feelings aren't there for the asking, Nad.
"They come out of nowhere without any warning. Do you think I want to go through this? You think I want to like two people at the same time? Being me is not the same fun.
"You don't know how depressed I've been because of all this, do you? Try looking at it from a different perspective. Learn to understand the current situation, I know you'll understand my situation or even Dara's."
What Niko said was true. I might have been too selfish and couldn't understand our current situation. Everyone here is hurting, we are all victims of a love that knows no situation. Feelings are not to blame, but perhaps it's the time and conditions here that made us all experience this bitterness.
"So, what do we do now?" I asked, opening my voice.
"What do you want us to do?" he asked back, causing me to stare at Niko's face in confusion.
"I want us to go back to the way we were."
"That's not possible. Everything has already happened. Now, we can only solve this problem until it's over. And, learn to be mature in dealing with this. It's hard, but we have to get through it," she said softly and left.
This bitter incident really frustrated me. On the other hand, I don't want to lose Niko as my husband. But, I also didn't want to lose Dara. She was my best friend, the one who was always there whenever I was in trouble. She always supported me and always smiled brightly at me.
This time, who will be beside me when I have difficulties? Who will support me and always smile brightly at me? Although I sometimes envy Dara's closeness with Niko, she is still my best friend.
The friend who was always there when I was lonely, the friend who was always there when I cried, the friend who was always there when I was sick. And, the best friend who always scolded me when I did something wrong. Now, where has that friend gone?
Niko was right. I must learn to mature in dealing with this problem. But, how can I solve this problem, while I'm in such a state of confusion. What should I do?