As any other day, I had been sitting in my last-period seat. Respectfully I don't know why but because I always sit here I am the last one out. Nobody talks to me and I mainly be looking in a daze as I stare at the clouds outside the glass window.
"To hold a hand up from the world has nothing to do with the heaven above... Unlike myself, I don't understand nature or so-called human beings, but I had to...?"
Usually, I don't speak to myself. If times had to come to that, I would have thought, I'm a crazy person... But as I say this with a smirk, I don't understand myself. To other people, I'm just "the boy who is alone" or even "the quite quiet one", but sure I can see all that, but just don't rub it in my face. I see how I don't like to speak to others, but I'm quite shy to speak to them myself. There's only one person I can think of who is way better than me...
Sophia Hope.
Yes.
This is the person that I'm thinking of. That girl who is in the same year as me and also the most popular one in the school if I had to guess, and an unheeding notice that this same girl is my childhood friend. With high hopes... I can guess that I'm a very lucky person to have her as my childhood friend. With all this quick speaking of my excitement. As a girl like that is...
An outgoing, very charismatic, and good-natured like Sophia Hope is a rarity to be seen in person or even across. She has so many friends from these few weeks of freshman year. I can all say is good for her, she is a one in a kind of person. And to even think her parents fully respect and care for her is nothing short then amazing.
"Hm, I think is time to go on with my day," In a muttered voice as I started to get up from my chair.
So as I was saying, she was probably grateful to have that wonderful life. So now I started to pack all my supplies and items I had on my desk, and as nobody was in this room with me. I can take my leave without any troubles as any other day.
Wait.
Hold on...
When was the last time I ever spoke to Sophia at school? ...It has been a while, right? Only a few weeks went by this school year. And it's only been the first semester, right!?
"...Tch!" As I immediately, sat down in my chair, in the classroom. I try to recall when the last time; I ever spoke or even spoke with Sophia. But as I noticed, I shouldn't be in class forever long. I got up again and went to the only exit in the classroom, but I stopped myself once again.
As I started to remember, I was alone from the start...
"Hey, Sophia! What's up, it has been a while!" I waved my hand at her. I didn't know if she would even respond because it had been a while since I had seen her. The last time I had seen her; was in middle school but I think it was the seventh grade, to be a matter of fact.
"...Huh, who are you?" Sophia tilted her head in dismay, "I've never seen you before... Are you new here? And you seem like a quiet kid; even though we are in the same year..."
I was shocked, but I noticed that it had been a long time since she had seen my face. So I started to scratch my head in surprised while having a sheepish grin of nervousness.
"You may not know me but I have been your childhood friend. And I may know your last name."
"My family name, huh? ...But I still can't remember someone like you."
"Ha... I see."
"Like really," She started to walk past me. "Someone like you is laughable, and seem to be my friend, with glasses as well? What a nerd, I'll never have a friend, or even have a childhood friend like you."
As she walked, she shoulder-checked me with ease. As I didn't know how to feel or act, but I turned to her with anguish in my voice, "Like someone named Andrew?" I yelled at her. But as I said that, I'll never forget the look she gave me.
Anger.
Untrustworthy.
A despise look.
That was what I saw, I was stunned to my very core. I never knew someone so respected and known to be kind and generous to others, can make a face of disgust of another human being. I didn't know what I did wrong, or was it me? I was gone for a whole while, I can understand that. But I got the sense that her whole life was getting disrespected, and unpleasantly taking her right of feelings. I wouldn't quite understand it...
And there's more than this one experience. "...Tch!" I made a sound with my tongue in annoyance, as I nervously remember those harsh events.
So as I was walking down that same hallway I always known, I saw a whole couple of people who were mostly friends. I didn't want to even be near anything like that again, I was staring at the ground above where my feet were. To an unknowing state, I was walking to my class, especially during the last period of the day.
"Watch were you walking, four eyes!"
A voice I didn't hear, but one I barely remember... But this person doesn't matter. So suddenly I felt a sharp pain above my foot area, still this pain was nothing, but I wasn't really for the next words, I'll soon to be hearing...
"...Augh! ...My foot," I slightly turn to look at the people who knock me down. "What was that for?"
A man, or should I say a student male spoke, "Watch where you walking! You damn nerd for brains!"
"What are you? A child?" I remarked.
He didn't like it... But someone who I noticed from the start, was wearing a hoodie over her student uniform.
"He talking to you coward!" Her valuable voice hit me hard in the heart. "You fool... As you have glasses, but you still can't see? Have some self-respect, you are an utterly embarrassing person. Get out our way, you unknowing person, complete trash of a human being. A whole liar!"
"What?"
She even walked up closer to my face, which was in a stunned expression, "Are you super slow? I'm talking to you, crackhead! You think your life is easy, huh? ...But now look at yourself, you still wouldn't have any friends in school. Nobody even likes you or even knows you! You're an unknowing piece of shit, and you utterly have no value where you stand, stay on this hard, cold floor, and fucking freeze away!"
Her face was like the first time when I had her in this school. If I could say that I would be crying like a little girl, would I be in the right? ...Disrespecting another person is just foul, but still having that same respect for your actions can follow you anywhere you go. So I think, and notice I didn't feel any disrespect from her words. But the reason for that, I guess, was from how she was close up to my face and was rubbing my cheek.
"You stupid!" She shouted at me angrily. "You are so disrespectful, and now leave my sight, coward!"
She was still acting foul to me, but as I knew it, this wasn't going to last for long. She walked back with a grin on her face. Undoubtedly I was still clueless...
So as this was coming to an end, all of them started to beat me up out of nowhere. I barely can remember what was happening, but as I a single one-person face. She wasn't doing anything or even recording... I don't want this to be happening to me. But as they left I was there looking like an injured dog, and nobody came for me. I even heard laughter around me so I guess, "Maybe she is correct about me" Still I had a frown smile, or was it an insignificant grin?
My uniform was looking like dogs came up and bit some of it off. I still can't understand why didn't I do anything. Even when I went to class, I lied about what happened to me with a smile. Obviously, the teacher didn't care, and to be honest, did any of my teachers say my name? Well... That's an uncaring question for an unknown person like me.
As I said before I truly don't understand, what humans are... Or isn't I the old one out? I'm a different person in this whole matter. Am I still, seeking an unknown answer?
With all my thoughts, I will still sink to the bottom—where I will be alone, even with no air bubbles I was truly alone within myself.
I knew that having someone you knew can leave up your spirits, but also understood that to truly know someone, is one with respect and care. ...Like an animal on the street alone doing nothing because you care for yourself, but because of what? Cause the animal might have a virus or even worse? Or is it just lonely, and no one can take care of it because of their busy life? But do not stay that dog or even any kind of sick and ruined pet animal... You can only look in dismay, disregard, or just have no respect for others.
But still having the type of view is unable I can comprehend myself, to seek my lonesome I can never hate a person. But not mean I can't get angry when I feel disrespect for my whole life, but it was just not the same after I got out of middle school.
Once again, I still hear her voice in my head. I never had friends when I left, or should I say that I meanly forgot? For I do notice someone when the fact is someone I hold dear as a comrade is undoubtedly noticeable. Maybe it was because I knew Sophia Hope, all the way back then. To barely forget someone like her is a crime, but because I won't forget a charming, wonderful, and best friend... My heart was starting to ache to tell me to make up with her. Life with me was so simple too, I can guess; it was hard for her too... To see someone from the past show up out of nowhere with a face of full happiness of a reappearance can make anyone sick... The person from the past can't understand what is happening in the present or near future.
...With someone who has the balls to do that, has low or no self-respect, common sense, or even morals to begin with.
I don't stare or even look in the past. But now noticing the void of the unknown can hurt anyone with notice. Just like a black hole in one's heart—to seek one's being can be an unknowing adventure. It can take years, months, and years to understand what's at fault... That's why people mainly forget the past and move on to the future.
"...No! I won't stand this anymore."
If someone could see my face right now, it would be the peak of true disgust for others. But not because I felt anger at who hurt me. I felt what Sophia had gone through when I was gone for that one year.
But suddenly the door in front of me opened.
As if I didn't expect it, or even come to the thought of seeing a person, that I thoughted hated me to my core.
"Haha... Hello, Andrew Aemilius... It has been a year, my sweet childhood friend" The girl who I supposed to hate. Supposedly, I was right nor wrong to have these feelings or disrespect in my heart. "...Fufu, isn't that a wonderful face you making at me."
This was the girl I had known since I was young, but to supposed to treat someone like a villain or immoral being, who had a plan to understand the devil's tongue. She shouldn't be grinning at me with such a pivoted face.