In the previous chapter, we introduced the contrast of love to the society and man. In this chapter, we shall be discussing love in detail; meaning of love, origine of love, the position of love, attributes of love and the importance of love in particular.
Talking about the meaning of love, we reflect to feelings in our heart and whole being. The overwhelming composite part of our heart that reflects what we display to the society. Love is totally vast in its concept. It revolves round every tantamount evolution of affairs of man and his coperate environment. Without love, it is very difficult for man to glow in his surrounding habitat.
A consultation has shown a multiple views of love from various individuals. Each refers to love according to his own construe regarding to his experience in the society. Amongst these definitions are: "Love is an intense feeling or deep affection for something or someone".
From the definition above, you will find out that love literally means, 'the concience of a person'. Just look at; it's your concience that tells you that this is cute, attractive or admirable. Your heart might be moved but if your concience doesn't concor with your heart, you will start experiencing a self conflict which will evatually shrink the feeling of the heart. You will start developing affection only when your heart is convinced that it's feeling is welcomed, and that's the duty of your concience.
Remember the definition mention something like, "intense". This exposes the degree of commitment. It's your commitment that frames your feeling, your commitment revolves your attention and attitude towards your feeling of affection. The intensity of your commitment will help your concience determine your sacrifice and deep involvement of your whole being into the relationship. Again, the definition talkes about affection. Affection refers to the things that draw up your concience and attention towards the feeling. Let's say you are developing a feeling for a lady. What deternines your affection will be based on your choice and wether this lady has reached this your choice of a woman. Your affection will always grow high when you remember how cute she looks relating to your own understanding of cuteness because what you call cute may not be what I will call cute too. It all depends on our individual impression.
Another factor that will boost the volume of your affection is the lady's character and attitude. Is she jovial, timid, social, loyal, arrogant, humble, rude or shy. This character and behavior is also dependent on your own choice of a woman. How you want your woman to behave may not be how I want her to behave. Thus, affection in the definition of love is dependent on our choice and like or should I say obsession or passion.
Whatever you are developing feelings for, those feelings are structured by your peculiar choice for such thing. Before you start lovig your society, there should be something about your society that is driving your attention towards your society, there should be something exceptionally different in your society from other surrounding societies. There should be something moulding your affection for that society which makes you want to die for that society. Remember, love has not overwhelmed you when you are not ready to lay down your life for what you love.
Another definition of love says that; "love is a great interest or pleasure in something". This definition talkes more about the preamble part of love. That's, the very beginning of time when one starts developing feelings for something. Before one falls in love with something, one first starts developing interest in that thing. He first starts paying attention to everything concerning this same thing. He will start from asking questions about this particular thing. He starts nuturing his ambition over this particular thing.
If this interest is for a lady, he will start from knowing her name, her relationship, her hubby and pleasure. He will start by developing interest in what she loves and finds pleasure doing. It will start by always inducing you into joining what she does. You cannot be in love With what is not your pleasure or interests you. Love all starts from developing interest and finding pleasure.
From all these instances, we can deduce that love literally means "attention" from this definition. It is your attention to something that will bring your interest to it. If your don't pay attention to a football match, you won't find pleasure in watching the football match.
Attention is another relevant element in building a very reputable love for something. When we pay attention to each other, we can understand each other's fears and worries and then mutually provide solution to them.
The third definition of love says that "love means liking or enjoying something". One cannot love what one doesn't like or enjoy. The basic of love all starts from the quality of likeness and enjoyment we derive from it. When we no longer enjoy the experience, we find out that we are already lagging in the basis of love. So the very basic component of love lies in the quality of likeness and enjoyment we find in it.
From this definition, we find out that love simple means "time". You can not like what you have not spent time with or can you enjoy what you have not spent time with. Wether we will like or enjoy it depends on the quality of time we've spent on the experience. You cannot take away love from time. It's with time that you get to know the basis of what you love, it's with time that you find out about your community importance over another, it's with time that you get to know the importance of the organization you belong to, it's with time that you get to know the value of the relationship that you seem so reluctant on, it's with time that you get to know the guts of your partner in relationship, business and places of work. Infact, time is the builder of every feeling of love. Without time, it is difficult for love to last long because everything will be concluded in haste
Another important factor of love is "Sacrifice". Starting from the first definition of love to the very last as contained is this book, all points at sacrifice. It's a sacrifice for you to open your concience and leave everything behind and fucose on building love. It's a sacrifice for you to put all your possible attention in the affairs of what you love. It's a sacrifice to allot your time in trying to build Love for your partner. Your ability to manage your sacrifice determines the efficiency of the love you will build. Love is all about sacrifice. And before you sacrifice anything for love, first understand the meaning of " Sacrifice".
Sacrifice simply means, "to donate a delegate proportion of your valuables in place of your interest. It means to give away without gaining it back. Sacrifice in short means to loose a property. But in all, sacrifice always paves ways for gain in anticipation.
This is not different in love. When you know that there's nothing to gain, then there should be nothing to sacrifice. For instance, let's say you were supposed to go to work that pays for your living, and your relationship will break if you don't stay at home to fix the fault today. The two is important, so you should sacrifice one out of the two that is of a lesser value to you and gain the more valuable one regardless of what people say or will say. When we don't know how to sacrifice for our love, may see ourselves dangling in the midst of love and not only that we will dangle, it will eventually fell off our hands.
Therefore, let us now unite the above definitions of love and put up a very tangible and contextual definition of love. According to the author, "love is defined as an affection with concience over a feeling from attention with time and sacrifice for a common interest."
Love is entirely different from what many believe it is. Today, people replace love with lust, sympathy, appreciation and guilt. All these feelings look exactly like love. And the worst moment is when the person cannot understand which feeling he\she has. This book will help us understand our feeling better earlier.
Let's start with lust. Lust always ask the question, "what will I gain". But love asks the very opposite question, " what will I offer". Lust draws you exactly the same way love draws you but that very different thing is that lust wither away when there's nothing to gain.