When I usually get back home from school, I go to sleep immediately, expecting nice dreams, but this one was different.
I lay my head in the pillow. When I entered the dream world, it was an unknown city, but I noticed a pink ring on my finger. I mindlessly started playing with it. Some light came out of it and one of those magical transformations happened, I was wearing a cute pink Lolita dress with puffy sleeves, the on I always daydreamed about wearing. I was flabbergasted, happy, and a mix of other emotions. I stood there as my hair moved with the wind, I felt extremely happy I can move mountains.
I start observing the ring in full interest, carefully pressing a button. And everything stopped except me, the girl who was about to fall from her bike, a robber, and some rain droplets.
"It's my duty to help those people!" I think to myself as I approach the girl, repositioning her bike. Then I approach the robber, I tie his shoe laces together.
"This is the best dream ever." I thought to myself, practically skipping.
The city was quite lively, a lot of kids were running around, adults were talking. I decided to open time again to see if what I did would have any affect, and it did.
Since some people were having ice cream, I decided to get some.
While I was licking my ice cream, an awfully familiar car passed by. It was mom's.
"Mom?" I shout.
I decide to follow it. Now, I know what I did wasn't heroic, but I stole a bike and starting going after her.
"Mom!" I call.
She rolls down her window and looks at me, she was usually gloomy, something was wrong.
Her car went faster, and it got over the speed limit, I was scared to death, and what I expected happened, she crashed.
I shout as I get off the bike. It caused a small fire, but gasoline was involved, so the whole scene was on fire at this point. I ran towards her but a car hit me.
I woke up, inspecting myself as I sigh.
"It was just a bad dream. A nightmare, there's always more room for dreams, its ok." I mumble.
I didn't feel sleepy after that, so my afternoon is pretty much ruined.
I get up, taking my notebook and writing what I just saw. I look at some of my Homura figurines on my study.
"Come on Cookie, snap out of it." I say, slapping my cheeks lightly.
Next day, I did the same thing, but seems like the dream had a sequel...
Since I already what would happen, I stopped time and snatched someone's keys, and got inside their car.
I will save mom.
I started speeding, but wait, I don't know how to drive a car. Don't know, don't care. I shrug as I keep driving.
My mom was right in front of me, but in that moment, an officer called me, and being the obedient little girl I am, I stopped as she approached.
"Hello miss." she asked.
"Hi." I whisper back.
"You are over sixteen, right?|
"Y-yeah, of course."
"You know how to drive, right?"
"What kind of question is that? Of course I can."
"Someone recently drove when they can't"
"Haha, that's so silly, Imagine that."
"Can I see your license?"
"I forget it at home." I mumble, sweating.
She frowned, I slowly moved the car, and then started speeding.
I heard sirens behind me, and again, I was scared. One police car turned into two, and then into five. I wanted to hand myself over, but for some reason, I didn't.
The tire popped, and I was forced to stop.
"Get out of the car." I was ordered.
I get out of the car with my hands in the air. I wanted to use my magic, but a police officer noticed and I got shot in the head.
I wake up in horror. I touch my forehead and started breathing heavily.
"It was just another bad dream, relax." I whisper.
One of the stuff that I hate is gore. I'm not sensitive to it, but it bothers me a lot, it makes me sick to my stomach. It makes me wonder how can people watch gore and genuinely enjoy what they are seeing.
I get up, ready to write about the sickening dream I just had. I want it gone.
I couldn't rest until I check on mom. I tip-toe to her room, and there she was, innocently napping in her shared bed with dad. I smile slightly as I left.
I really wanted to talk to someone about those dreams, I'm honestly tired. I know they only appeared two days ago, but I went from dreaming about cats to having nightmares about my mom dying. I decided that I will talk to Hermia about it.
While walking to school today with Hermia, I decided to tell her.
"Hermia?" I call.
"Yes?" She replied, fixing her gaze on me.
"I know you can't dream, but is it perhaps normal to have gory visuals instead of dreams?"
"I... don't know, but I suppose not."
"Those were my dreams for the last two nights, they bother me a lot."
Hermia was a bit taken aback.
"Did you go through any traumatic event?" She asked. My whole existence is a traumatic event.
"No." I answer, looking at the floor.
"You can talk to me about anything."
"I know, they just appeared out of nowhere."
She nodes, "It's alright, it was just some nightmares, don't let them ruin you day, okay?"
That day when I went home, I was too scared to even look at the pillow, but I remembered what Hermia said, and it calmed me down. I sigh as I lay down.
And it was another sequel. I was practically skipping when I first saw the ring, but now, it's the reason of my uneasiness. I start hitting my head.
"Wake up." I whisper, but it didn't work, I started going in circles, passing by the falling girl and the robber escaping.
I was too busy hitting that I didn't notice my mom passing by. I quickly stop time and approach her.
I pop three tires, and I felt somewhat relieved. I resume time.
The car suddenly stopped, and mom looked disappointed, she got out of the car and took a ride with someone else. I was on my knees, watching the car crash before my eyes. WataMote's ending served as background music. I ran to my mom with tears in my eyes, holding her hand. I didn't feel a pulse. And then it hit me.
No matter how much I try, she'll always end up like this.
I started shaking and screaming as some people pulled me away from the scene, "いいえ (iie)!" No.
I had enough, I made the choice to tell dad about it. He was in his study room with Viktoria.
"Dad? Can I talk to you?" I whisper.
"Sure." He said.
I told him about my dreams, how mom kept dying, how I tried to save her but always ended up failing, I was pouring my heart out. I end my talk with,
"Maybe it's fate?"
"Yeah... Maybe it is fate." Dad said as he stood up and approached me. He held my hand.
And that when I noticed that the ring was still in my finger. It's a dream.
I look at my dad with horror as he tries to take the ring off, but I kept resisting.
"What are you doing?" I shout.
"You yourself said it was fate, it's pointless. Give up on saving her and suffer in silence."
"But it's your wife!" I say, trying to hide how hurt I am.
He glared at me and pushed me to the floor, snatching the ring and putting it in his bag and leaving.
I sat at the corner comprehending what just happened. "Huh?" I mumble.
I stand up as I approach the bag, Viktoria stared at me, and I quietly took the ring.
And suddenly, dad barged in, glaring at both me and Viktoria.
"Koyuki took it." Viktoria stated.
I look at her in disbelief, but dad charged at me, pinning me to the wall, trying to take the ring. I started kicking, but he placed his grip on my neck, and I was crying at this point.
I tried pressing the ring, but the ring wasn't working. Until I finally started coughing aggressively.
And time was reversed. I was right in front of my house, I wipe my tears and turn away.
"I need to think of a way to wake up." I sniffle.
What's the thing that all of my dreams share?
I always die at the end of the dream, therefor, I should kill my myself to wake up.
I don't want to kill myself, but what can I do about it?
I stop time. I take a walk around the city, everyone was happy, and then there's me. I saw a dad and his daughter having fun and laughing together and drinking milkshakes. I felt my heart ache. That was me and my dad once. I angerly slap the milkshake away from her hand. I pause for a second, it's not the girl' fault. But it's not mine either, it's just a dream, it's not real, I didn't hurt anyone, it's just my subconscious playing game on me. I chuckle a little.
I enter one of the local restaurants and started inspecting the knives. I held one in my hand, pressing it against my chest.
"Never mind I can't do this." I give up.
I'll be stuck here forever. Or maybe not. I saw a bunch of Yakuza gang members supposedly walking by.
"If I can't unalive myself, I will let someone else do it." I shrug as I open time, hearing the girl's sniffles in the background, I walked up to the Yakuza.
I started throwing random meaningless threats, watching them growing angrier by the second, and I felt my legs trembling. I got punched square in the jaw by one of them, I fall to the ground with missing teeth and a broken jaw.
"You said somethin'?" He said, mockingly.
And I felt my eyes water. I can reverse and manipulate time, but if I kept running, I'll never escape.
Another one approached me with a katana in his hand, and that's when I knew I messed up badly. I shake my head helplessly, but he slashed me from my left shoulder to my right hip bone, making sure I feel every ounce of pain.
They laughed, and I never felt so humiliated in my whole existence. I tried to stand up, shaking, I got on my knees, but he stabbed me with the katana in my back, I hopelessly whimper.
I hold his leg as he turned, he looked at me.
"Kill me." I write in the mud.
"You in pain? You can't bear it?" He asks. I nod.
"Sounds like a you problem!" He laughed before leaving.
I waited for what felt like eternity, but was in fact a mere three minutes.
I woke up screaming, crying, and panting heavily.
Mom came running, "Koyuki!"
"I-it's nothing mom, just a bad dream." I whimper.
"Are you sure?" She looked at me with suspicion.
I nod as I wipe my tears.
Mom left, and I curled up, quietly sobbing. I'll never view my dad the same way again. And I feel bad about it, he did nothing wrong. I mean, I did kind of expect Viktoria to snitch. But it was a total punch in the gut. ~