It dawned upon me how much longer I need to be here?
It felt like days have already passed, weeks even, ever since my death. At this point I don't even know whether I could last another day without anything new happening.
I was desperate for entertainment, anything was fine so long as it's something I can see, or touch if I can.
Humming rhymes was the only thing I could do, and sooner or later, I'll die out of boredom, whether double death was possible.
Well, knowing that I have nothing else to do except to float into nothingness, I shuffled my memories and recalled each, one by one, the very memories that made an impact into my life.
In kindergarten, at the very first day of school. I was the most scared child amidst all the young folks in the room, the smallest as well.
Unlike the rest who were happily entering, excited to meet and have new friends, I was the one last to enter, refusing to release my mother's hand as I grip with all my strength, I think I cried a little when that happened. but eventually, like the rest, I had no choice but to enter.
After all, no one in their right mind wouldn't let their children go to school. In the philippines, education is a must. There's tons of requirements just to apply for a minimum wage job.
Unlike on other countries, this one was strict to the point where you need to have a college degree just to work as a janitor.
Ironic, isn't it?
Next was middle school, similar to the beginning, I remained the same. But at some point i finally had friends to be with, play with each day. Some had anger issues , and I as well, while the rest just didn't care.
I remember this one time when one of my classmate in the third grade, a girl names Bethany, I couldn't remember her true name so let's call her this for now.
Bethany suddenly rages as we were joking around, imagining that we were being chased by ghosts while we played at an abandoned building . I could still feel how she gripped my neck and almost choke the lights out of me, and considering how she was a foot taller than me, raising me up high was as easy as pie.
But when that happened, I didn't struggle, as If I wanted that it to happen in the first place.
Well, nothing escalated and we forgive each other after that. Only the two of us knew about that specific event.
Life moved forward and each of us went in our own ways in junior high.
At some point, every single one of us had this reunion, it wasn't big, just a small dining in the near mall. And unlike middle school, I was taller than most girls by now, which is a big gap compared to my childhood years.
Everyone changed except for me. But my childish actions were nowhere to be seen at this point. I kept it hidden due to many reasons.
I sat next to the very girl who came for my life, Bethany. After a few years,we've seen each other again. We ate and told stories about what happened to us in the past years. Hours passing by like minutes, and as we chat, I felt closer to her than before.
One thing led to another and the time came to return to our own lives.
That's until Bethany and I was the only one left in the restaurant. I didn't ignore her gaze, instead I look at her straight in the eyes. We chatted a short few minutes. It was going great, we weren't close before but that might change starting this moment.
She apologized about strangling me when we were young, saying how I made her angry because I was practically playing with other girls.
One more important thing you need to know about me is that I'm the most dumbest person in the world. So hearing her words at that time, I didn't realize she liked me, as in, REALLY like me, to the point where she became this type of person called a Yandere.
Just so you know, I didn't found out about anime terms until I entered the last year of my junior high.
As we left the restaurant beside one another, as most of you already know, it was time to separate once more. Well, I don't know whether we'll see each other again or meet by chance. But as we went on our own ways, the reunion ended in a flash.
Years passed after that. I got addicted to the internet, games and multimedia. I recently found out that Bethany got married and now has this large house in the area.
For some reason I felt a sigh coming out of me. I envied these type of people, managing to achieve what they want even though we were the same age. It was regretting how I didn't took the first step to an intimate relationship, but, it was for the better, all in all.
By the years of my junior high, I was still a silent person, I was in the nerd section because my new classmates thought off me as special.
I mean, why would they think that? Does being silent means retarded? I never cared in the first place, but it seems like my classmates were the type of people who always get on each others nerves.
A fight often happens inside the classroom. And at some point, I got in the middle of it.
I was pushed so sudden by this person who was the same height as me, well, he was little bit taller but who cares.
He had this annoying braces that he always shows whenever he speak, and his hair was gelled to stand on all ends, and every time a word comes out of his mouth its as if he was mocking everyone in the room.
I never interacted with most classmates I had, and why did I suddenly got into this mess?
I didn't do anything to anger anyone, for all I know I was the victim in this mess.
He pushed me several time until I hit the wall. My anger welled up and in an instant, then I snapped. I felt my fist flying towards his face, but clouded with anger, my strike never hit its target.
Instead, my fist flew towards the person beside him as he ducked, a girl by the name of Gade.
I felt my fist hitting her jaw, and at that moment, instead of being relieved, I felt guilty. Guilty and sad how I let my anger get the best of me.
I felt my tears welled up, falling to my cheeks as I turn around to look away. I didn't want anyone to see me like this.
Why did I felt those kinds of emotion? Why did I cry? I never manage to hit the guy I planned on, so why did I cry?
The answer was unknown even to myself.
After that, I went on my way to apologize to the girl. She let bygones be bygones, and the next thing I knew, we became close throughout the years.
After I graduated junior highschool, she gave me a hug. The tightest hug I have ever gotten. One that almost knock the lights out of me.
Till this day I remember her as a sister, one large cuddle bear who gave the best embrace.
After that, we never saw each other ever again. Yet, the memory of her still remained fixed inside my mind.
Well, considering there's not much major events in my life, I think that was everything. Except for the already written moment of my death on the last chapter. I think that's it.
If I were to tell my whole story here, then a few chapters won't probably suffice. What we'll need by that time is a length of three books.
Returning to the pitch black color of the afterlife. I felt the need to hum, just to relieve myself from being bored once again. I whistled the moments to pass after that.
A loud pitch noise entered my ears, I had no choice but to cover my ears with my imaginary hands. I felt my eardrums bursting by the second, and although I was already a soul, I still felt pain by the second.
I fell to my imaginary knees and held on. Hoping it will be over in a matter of time.
I felt my whole body turning hot, being crunch by an unknown force, as if my entirety was being pushed at every direction. Seconds passed and the bright light has finally returned.
"Finally!!!" I shouted on the top of my lungs, in a happy tone.
I reached with my right hand and the bright light engulf my very existence. A light breeze passed through my head, the pitch noise was gone, the pain slowly subsided.
As I opened my eyes two stunning figures surrounded my very vision. Both having perfect looking faces as if God favored them highly.
One was a women in her early twenties, she had a reddish crimson hair color while her eyes showed the essence of the sea, whilst the other one was a man with brown hair, his eyes showed a darker hint of red.
The women opened her mouth, the words they conversed were a different type of language I currently have no recollection off.
"Feros jaha, bengit huro?"
"Gekfki, ahu ori, gehho touko?" A reply of the man beside her.
I felt a tinge of pain in my head, and after a moment, their next words became similar to my native tongue. As if the very language was instantly carved into my mind.
"What do we name him?" The man asked with a proud expression.
The women took a few moments to search her thoughts, pushing her lips outward. Her eyes widen after that.
"Bane..." She turned her face downwards toward me. "Your name will be Bane." With a smile on her face and a tear on her cheek, I felt the world dimming and my eyes closing in a matter of moments.
I didn't know what was happening, nor did I know where I was. As I felt my consciousness floating away, exhausted for some reason, I felt safe and guarded, knowing that wherever I am, I was in good hands.
I fainted and several shouts echoed through my ears.