Aisha's POV
I came home much later than usual. But I had called my mother prior, telling her that I was out for a project with Sana.
I wasn't wearing an abaya, I had deliberately left it in my bag today because David insisted that he drop me home and I couldn't refuse this time.
I open the front door after fiddling with the keys and step inside. It was nine at night and usually, my father and brother came home from work after ten so it was safe to say that only mom was at home and no one could witness my Western attire.
"Who did you come with?" My head whips towards my mom standing by the living room window. Perhaps she saw me coming in David's car.
I was already prepared for it today though. No, running around the bush anymore, I knew what I wanted.
"With a friend," I reply unapologetically and she eyes my attire up and down with a scowl.
"Since when have I taught you to go out looking like that and come home this late?"
"Maa." I place my hands on both of her shoulders. "This is who I am. This is how I want to be. The sooner you accept it the happier I'll be."
Suddenly she raised her hand and slapped me hard on the face and I grabbed the cheek where she had hit. I look at her with disbelief, hate, and agony.
"You're defying the teachings of Islam which are meant to protect us. I never thought trusting you and sending you to university would come out this way or I would have never agreed." Tears were trickling down her face.
Funny, why the hell was she crying when she was the one who hurt me?
"I knew this was going to happen. Why can't you guys just accept what I want like Sana's family?!" I yell at her.
"Sana? Is she the one misleading you?"
"Oh for god sake maa! I'm a grown-up, I know what is right for me and what is wrong." She looked hurt by my words but I had to say them sooner or later.
I don't know where I was getting this freaking courage from but it felt good to be free. But a part of me knew it was all because of David.
Since he confessed that he'd marry me I had been on the seventh cloud.
My mind wandered back to the time in our hotel suite.
"I'll marry you." He exclaimed and stood up from the bed only to grab me in his arms. "If this is what it means to put your faith in me then I'll marry you."
"But… You don't even know me yet."
"I know enough that you make my heart flutter whenever I see you. The time you're away from me I want it to run fast quickly. Sometimes even an hour is enough to know that the right person is in front of you and if you miss it, you'll regret it for life. I don't want to waste any time with you."
"David… I never presumed you to be such-"
"Hopeless romantic?" He quirks up an eyebrow and a smile appears on my face.
"Yeah, you can say that."
"So when are we getting married? I can't wait to" He leans in to kiss my lips but I block them by placing my hand over and he chortles.
"We have to talk to my parents first."
"Oh no. I'm very bad at that."
"You'll charm them just as you charmed your way in my heart." I wink.
"And… If they don't agree?"
"Then we'll elope." I shrugged.
"That's way easier. We'll just go with the latter."
"David!" I hit lightly on his shoulder and he laughed again. "But there is one itty bitty problem."
I had wanted to tell him that I was already engaged but his next sentence made me bite my words back.
"No matter how big the problem is. I have set my mind on you and I'll have you by whatever means because I love you."
Then and there I thought that my engagement didn't matter at all. Hazek doesn't mean anything to me or is worth mentioning his name and just as quickly I have been engaged, this engagement could end too regardless of what people may think because I love David too.
"No university from tomorrow. From now on, you're not allowed to leave the house." Mother pulls me back from my thoughts.
Here, I have been just slapped and I'm thinking about the time I spent with David. Oh! What love is doing to me
"If this is how you think you can change my mind then stop fooling yourself 'cause I'm not stopping. I'd wear what I like, I'd go where I like, I'd do what I want. Hit me all you want." With my harsh words, I darted towards the staircase and rushed inside my room, leaving her spilling her eyes in the living room.
~~~
The next day was the weekend but I wasn't sitting at home, I had plans to meet David. I dressed up in Western attire, did my makeup, and curled my hair. I was wearing my short heels when I heard a knock on my door and suddenly Maleeha appeared inside.
"Assalamu Alaikum, how are you Aisha?" She asks, making her way inside the room.
"I… Uh…" I was hesitant at first because I was just caught wearing jeans and a sleeveless top which was not normal in the family. But since she now knew, it was way better. "I'm good. You're here suddenly, everything alright?" I ask after slipping into my heels.
"Yeah… Are you going somewhere?" She eyed my attire and I wasn't ashamed at all. In fact, her look if anything only made me even more confident about the choices I was opting for.
"Yeah, I have plans."
"I'll get to the point then… I need to talk to you."
"Go ahead."
"Why are you making such bold Tiktok videos?"
"So Hazek informed you." I roll my eyes.
"No, I found out through a friend."
"Oh."
"Oh?" She scoots near me and grabs onto my hands. "Aisha, what have you been thinking lately? What's going on in your head?"
"Maleeha, I don't think anyone in the family would understand me but please not you too. You're my friend. You of all people should understand me."
"I am here to help you. Please make me understand."
"Maleeha… I don't think I can do parda (women cover). It's just not me. I don't feel happy in a hijab (scarf), abaya, or niqab (veil). They are too much to handle for me. I want to be free."
"But Aisha… Parda never stopped you from doing what you want. But revealing your skin to the world isn't respectable for a woman. The people who see you look at your body. They find you lustful material, someone who can cool their desires. You're an entertainment for their eyes. Islam protects you from that."
"God! You sound like I have been making some dirty videos."
"I saw all your TikTok videos. You started with parda first, then your niqab went off, then hijab, then slowly your dresses started becoming short. Do you think it's going to stop somewhere? Even if you don't make dirty ideas, such videos don't make you any reputable either. The brands you've been collaborating with all require you to show your skin for money. Doesn't it feel like a stripper? To be paid after revealing yourself?"
"Enough Maleeha!" I stood up from the chair in front of my dresser while she sat on the carpeted floor. "That's why I am against Islam. It has boggled all of your minds, never allowing a person to grow out of his shell, to spread their wings."
"Aisha, Islam wants what is best for both men and women and we being human can't foresee it, Allah created us so he knows what is best for us just like a mother takes care of her children knowing what's best for them. If a child cries because he wants to play with the poop on the floor can a mother let it happen? No! That's why Islam has set pre boundaries and we can only see its benefits in the long run."
"Even mothers make mistakes. Perhaps God is the same." I shrug and Maleeha's face falls apart, his eyes widened with disbelief. "Now if you don't mind, I have a place to be."
"What about Hazek? He won't allow you to do this all after marriage." She quickly stops me by getting in my way. I knew what she was implying. She wanted to know about my relationship status so I decided to be fair and true to her.
"It's funny how he's still willing to marry me," I said with a tsk. "I hoped he would put an end to this engagement but no, he's damn stubborn. Don't worry I'll end this engagement and let everyone know how I feel."
"What about your parents? They'll be broken, Aisha!"
"Time heals everything and I'm sure they'll eventually come to peace with my decision."
With that, I turned around and left her frozen on the ground.
I walked downstairs, past my mother who looked at me with teary eyes and covered her mouth with a handkerchief. "Don't go beti (daughter)." She cries but I ignore her and shut the door behind me.
David was waiting for me outside in his car and I sat in the passenger seat with him. "Is that your mother?" He asks, looking at the doorway of the house.
I glanced at my mom who stood with Maleeha beside her while shaking her head and Maleeha supported her by holding her shoulders.
"Shouldn't I say hi to them?"
"That won't be necessary anymore now. Let's go." I avert my eyes and he pulls onto the street.