Your POV:
I hiss as I feel the light from the sun on my body. I slowly open my eyes but shut them again immediately when I see the blinding light peek through the curtains.
I groan and rub my head as if that would get rid of the pounding headache. I was about to turn over and try to get back to sleep, but I finally realize that I'm not in my room.
I sit up slowly so as to not get too dizzy, and look around the room... Where am I? It's the same layout as Erwin's office but with different furniture. Oh! It's Levi's office. How did I get here? Why am I here?
I'm still wearing all of my clothes, not that I thought Levi would do anything with me since I was so drunk. Just making random observations to try and keep my mind off of the pain in my head. Ugh, I need water, I doubt I drank any last night, so I'm definitely feeling dehydrated. Levi's bathroom should be inside his bedroom...
I look next to me, on the table, and see a glass full of what appeared to be water. But when I see it, I shiver. It reminds me of the last time I took a drink of clear liquid sitting next to me the morning after a drunken night out thinking it was water... It was not.
I had to motivate myself to stand up, but that wasn't working. Every time I tried to stand, dizziness and nausea would take over. I sit back on the couch trying to think of what to do. I don't want to throw up on Levi's floor, he'll have me publicly whipped or something... I can't stand, but maybe I could crawl my way to the bathroom.
I let my body slither off the couch as if I were made of liquid. If I didn't feel as sick as I did I would probably laugh at that very ungraceful way to get off a couch.
When I'm on the cool floor I pause and just lay there. The coolness from the floor felt so nice against my tired body... Come on (y/n), no more stalling, you need water, let's go.
I slowly crawl my way across the floor, having to take occasional breaks on my way. I have never been this hungover before, it's borderline unbearable. It feels like forever, but I finally reached the threshold of Levi's bedroom. Good, he's not in here. No one needs to witness this.
"What are you doing?"
Fuck.
I turn my head a bit to see Levi walking toward me, an amused expression on his face.
I stretch my limbs out and wave them around, "Cleaning the floor, sir." I say quietly.
"Too inefficient." I don't have to look at him to know he is smirking now.
"I'm getting water, if you must know. So, if you'll excuse me." I confess, continuing slowly crawling my way to the bathroom.
"I left you a glass of water on the table next to the couch." Levi sighed, walking around to stand in front of me.
"How was I supposed to know it was water?" I grumble, trying to crawl around him, but he keeps blocking my path.
"Do you have reason to believe otherwise?" He glares down at me.
"Last time I woke up after drinking that much the night before, my drunken self left me a glass of what I thought was water. Being dehydrated, I grabbed it and took a big drink. It was gin... and I puked everywhere." Talking about it made me want to throw up, I never want to drink again... But that's what we always say.
I look up to see an even more amused-looking Levi, "I can see drunk (y/n) doing that to sober (y/n)." He comments.
"Yep, she's a gem. Now, if you'll please excuse me." I try to go around him again, but once again he blocks my path.
"I told you, it's water, go drink it."
"I have to go into the bathroom anyways, so it's fine. Out of the way, honey badger." I say, knowing it will annoy him.
Levi walked around behind me and grabbed my ankles, "No!" I scream as he drags me all the way back to the couch.
All that progress I made, lost. I worked so hard to get there, now I have to start all over again. Damn him.
When we reach the couch he lets my ankles go and smirks down at me as I glare up at him.
He grabs the water off the table and hands it to me, "Just hurry up and drink it, let's go."
"Go where?" I ask, giving him a confused look, "We don't have anything planned today other than some final preparations and briefings."
"Firstly, you're going to shower, I smell alcohol coming out of your pores. Secondly, breakfast. Thirdly, you're taking it easy today, I can't have you in this kind of shape for tomorrow." Levi explained as I downed the whole glass of water.
"Why are you being so nice to me?" I narrow my eyes at him suspiciously, "Shouldn't you be mad that I got so drunk in the first place?"
"Do you wish for me to lecture you about the dangers of binge drinking?" He asks me, crossing his arms in front of his chest.
"... No," I answer.
"Alright, then get up. I don't have all day." Surprisingly he holds out a hand to help me up. Who is this Levi, and why is he being so nice to me this morning?
I accept his hand and he pulls me up a little too quickly and the dizziness and nausea hits again. Levi hangs onto me and walks with me toward his bathroom.
He leaves me standing by the sink and turns on the water in the shower, "Make it quick." He says as he goes to leave the bathroom. I nod at him and make my way toward the shower.
I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror and feel like I want to throw up again. My face was pale, huge bags under my eyes from lack of sleep and dehydration, very dry lips despite the water I just drank, and my (h/l) (h/c) was sticking out in all directions.
I sigh and slowly make my way into the shower. The warm water felt so nice on my dehydrated skin. I try to remember the events from last night as I wash myself using Levi's soap.
I can remember being at the bar and kicking Oluo's ass in everything that was thrown our way by Hange. I remember most of the challenges we did, especially the one where we had to make Shadis laugh, or I guess smirk. I'll have to apologize to him next time I see him.
I briefly remember talking to Erwin outside the bar. I still don't really understand why he was ignoring me, but he did seem genuinely sorry. I wonder what he wants to talk to me about after the expedition... Oh well, no point in dwelling on it, I'll find out when we come back.
And how did I end up in Levi's room? That was another curious mystery to me. If he was trying to walk me back in my drunken state, why didn't he just bring me to my room? Why bring me here? I appreciate his concern, but it is rather confusing...
Oh well, I guess. I finish showering and grab a fluffy towel hanging by the edge of the sink. I dry myself off and finally realize I don't have a change of clothes. I don't really want to put the clothes back on I went out last night...
I notice on the sink there are some folded clothes that must belong to Levi. He really does think of everything, doesn't he?
I put the clothes on, it's just a simple grey long sleeve shirt and some plain pants with a belt. I am a little smaller than him, so his clothes don't exactly fit, but they do fit better than Erwin's clothes.
I towel dry my hair until it isn't dripping anymore, and make my way out of the washroom. "Thank you for letting me borrow some clothes, Levi," I say to him as I enter his office. He looks up at me and I notice he's blushing slightly. Is it because I'm wearing his clothes?
Levi stands up and walks towards me, "It's nothing, now let's go. Food."
"I don't remember much from last night, but thank you for helping me, I appreciate it." I say to him. I decide against insisting I didn't need his help, but I don't know if that's true since I can't really remember all that happened.
Levi just shrugs, "I don't dislike you, so I don't really mind helping you."
I freeze and stare at him in awe. "What?" He growls at the look I'm giving him.
"You 'don't dislike' me?" I mimic him as best as I can, "Levi! That's practically a love confession coming from you!"
He sighs, "I should have left you to sleep outside."
I follow him out of his office into the hall, still giggling. I look up to see Petra standing there, "Hey Petra! Did you hear?! Levi doesn't dislike me!"
She gives me a weird look. She seems both angry and sad, trying to figure out which emotion she wants to convey first. I stop laughing and give her a concerned look, "Are you okay, Petra?"
She glares at Levi who just raises his eyebrows at her. What is this weird tension?
"Um, I'm going to go to breakfast. You 2 seem like you need to talk or something." I start to make my way toward the Mess Hall, but Levi grabs my arm, "There's nothing to say that hasn't already been said. Let's go."
I stare at Levi, "What was that about?" I ask him curiously, as he doesn't seem to be at all surprised by her behavior. "I'll just say you're not the only one who had a rough night." He mumbles and walks with me toward the Mess Hall.
"Did she confess to you?" I ask him softly. Why do I care? It's not my business... What am I doing?
"Yeah," He said simply. "Did you reject her?" I press. "I would think that would be obvious seeing her reaction this morning to seeing you and I walk out of my room."
My face goes red, oh no, I hope Petra doesn't think we hooked up last night. I don't want any awkward tension with her. Not when we were just starting to get to know each other more.
"We didn't do anything last night, right? I mean, I feel like I would remember if we did..." I trail off as Levi smirks at me, "If we had hooked up you would still be laying on the couch, unable to move, brat." He says as he flicks me hard on my forehead, making it pound even more.
"True," I smirk back at him, "And who would ever be able to forget the sweet nothings you would have whispered to me like, 'I don't hate you as much as everyone else', 'You're not unattractive', 'You smell like you've showered somewhat recently', and then after everything, 'You're not the worst I've had."
I notice Levi has stopped walking beside me, so I turn to look at him, only to see he is trying his best not to laugh. "Please stop." He says quietly, trying to compose himself.
"'I mean, it was sex, I guess... I wouldn't be disgusted if you wanted to do it again... I suppose.'" I continue, trying my best to imitate his usual monotone voice.
"Pfft." Is all the laugh I get out of him, but I'll still take it.
We reach the Mess Hall and it is almost full at this point. There are still a few spots open at the table my squad usually sits at.
The table behind our's sits most of the other higher-ups, including Mike, Erwin, Hange, Nanaba, and Gelgar. I was shocked to see Hange who seemed to be her usual self. Wasn't she the only one of us who passed out at the bar? How is she functioning right now?
I briefly remember talking to Erwin last night, so when his eyes meet mine my face goes red immediately. He wants to talk to me about something after the expedition tomorrow. I was going to go crazy trying to figure out what he wanted to say.
"So where did you disappear to last night?" Eren asks me as soon as I sit down. "Ahhh," I start, but I can't really remember, so I give Levi a pleading look. Maybe he can explain what happened to me after the bar.
"She attempted to follow Petra and I back to base, but her clumsy idiot ass couldn't go upstairs, so she lied down on the grass and just gave up," Levi explains. I start laughing, "Yep, sounds like me."
"Sasha was worried about you," Eren frowned at me, "She told me this morning you weren't in your room when she got back, and you weren't there this morning." I feel like Eren is about to lecture me like a parent.
"She was in my room," Levi answered nonchalantly. I saw an angry expression cross Eren's face before he composed himself. "Why?" He ended up saying through clenched teeth.
"What business is that of your's, brat?" Levi retorted.
"Captain, if you say it like that people will get the wrong idea," I laugh nervously, "He was just being kind and making sure I was alright, Eren. The gods forbid anyone actually knowing Captain Levi is a nice person."
Eren just stares down at his breakfast and doesn't say anything else on the subject.
I look casually to my left to see Oluo with his head down on the table, food untouched. I seriously considered scaring him awake, but I suppose I can give him a break. He is probably hurting from the multiple losses as well as the alcohol.
All of a sudden there was a bang on the table, startling Oluo out of his sleep. I look to see what the cause of the noise was, and it appeared to be Petra. She must have slammed her food tray on the table pretty hard.
I raise my eyebrows at her, "Was that necessary? Most of us are still hungover."
"Please, a hangover? " She laughed at me, her normal sweet and caring disposition has been replaced with something else, "I'm sure you slept just fine with the Captain tending to your every need."
Petra made sure she was speaking loud enough for others in the area to hear. I didn't know that jealousy would change her like this.
"Petra, I'm really not in the mood to argue with you, so just stop. You're only going to embarrass yourself." I warn her. I'm already not in a great mood today, and she does not want to push me now of all times.
"That's why you followed us back, right?" She continues, other cadets were turning to listen to the conversation. They have probably never seen Petra freak out like this before, from another perspective I'm sure it is rather amusing. "You followed us so you could make sure you could get him to reject me and go after you."
"Wait, wait. I think I've heard this one before, don't tell me... Ugh, I can't remember the punchline." I say, feigning ignorance.
"It's not a joke, (y/n)!" Petra raises her voice even more.
Levi looks furious, I see him out of the corner of my eye trying to rein in his anger. I put my hand on his arm, trying to reassure him that I can handle Petra's jealous rage.
"Petra, that doesn't make any sense," I sigh, "I may not remember parts from last night, but I do remember you were in a bad mood at the bar. So your issue with Levi popped up before you left the bar with him. I barely even spoke to him when we were there."
Petra's face is growing redder and redder as her anger rises. She was about to argue more, but Oluo spoke up this time, "Petra, will you relax? She was basically with me the whole night. When did she have time to conspire with Levi to reject you?"
Petra turns on him, "Now you're on her side? I thought if anyone would understand it would be you, Oluo!"
I slam my fist on the table, startling both Petra and Oluo. I've had enough of this petty argument. "Petra, it's not my fault that Levi doesn't feel the same way about you as you do about him. I can't believe you actually have to blame someone else, in order to justify in your mind as to why you were rejected."
I stand up from the table getting ready to leave, "Maybe, just maybe, the issue is with you and not with me." I feel more exhausted than ever. I turn to leave the Mess Hall. I see Eren and Levi get up from the table, so I raise my hand at them, "Please, don't follow me." They respect my request and sit back down as I make my way out of the Mess Hall.
First Oluo and now Petra? Relationship-wise, things are not much different than what they are from when I was working under Laurie. People being petty and jealous over things I have no control over, it's so frustrating.
I decide to go pop in and see Peter, I haven't seen him around recently. I am pretty nervous about my first expedition tomorrow, and I would just love to sit and chat with him for a while.
I reach his office door and give it a quiet knock. I hear him invite me in and I greet him with a smile. "Hey Peter, I hope I'm not interrupting anything."
Peter looks up at me, hazel eyes shining brightly, "There you are! I was hoping you would stop by before you die tomorrow."
"Ouch! No faith at all, huh?" I laugh as I sit down across from him. "You know I wouldn't joke if I didn't know for sure if you were coming back. You're going to come back, I know it." He reassures me with a smile.
"Do you have anything for a hangover?" I ask him hopefully. Peter gave me an amused look, "Have a little too much fun at the bar last night?" He stands up from his chair and goes to one of the cupboards to grab a couple of pills and some water.
"Well, from what I remember I had fun," I say as I reach for the pills and water. I smile my thanks as he puts the pills in my one hand, as my other hand reaches for the water.
I grab it, but my hand jerks suddenly, causing me to drop the glass. I stare at my hand, frozen. As suddenly as the jerking happened, it stopped.
Peter looks at me with concern, he goes to grab my hand but I pull away from him, "Sorry, I'm just dehydrated and hungry, so I just have the shakes a bit." I stand up and grab the glass I dropped, good thing it didn't break, and go get more water and clean up the water I spilled.
"(Y/n)," Peter starts, but I interrupt him, "So how are the kids? I'm sorry I won't be able to see them before I leave." I smile at him nervously, hoping he won't persist.
His shoulders sag a bit, but he allows me to change the subject, "Yeah, they ask about you every day. Have you visited your house yet?"
"Yeah, it brought back a lot of memories. Mac and I lived a few blocks down from it. It was even the same layout."
He facepalms his forehead, "Shit, I didn't know that. Are you okay?"
I laugh at his reaction, "I knew you didn't know, but I'm fine. I had some weird flashbacks, but it's fine, I promise." He breathes a sigh of relief and sits back in his chair, "So, tell me about last night."
"I kicked Oluo's ass in everything." I smile smugly. "Well obviously," Peter laughed, "But that's not what I was referring to."
I give him a confused look, not really understanding what he means.
"Were Levi and Erwin there?" Peter asks, studying me carefully. I narrow my eyes at him, "Yes... Why?"
"Curious. I've never seen or heard of them spending more time with cadets than what is required of them." He says thoughtfully.
I shrug my shoulders, "I guess they just wanted to let off some steam."
"I don't think that was the reason." He retorts, smirking at me.
"I know what you're implying," I chuckle, "But nothing happened with either of them. I just talked to Erwin and Levi helped me get back last night."
"I thought you and Erwin weren't talking to each other," Peter said, giving me a confused look.
"You knew about that?" I groan. "I'm pretty observant, (y/n). Especially when it comes to you." He answers with a smile.
"Erwin said he wanted to talk to me about something when we get back from the expedition," I say, trying not to make a big deal out of it.
"And Levi helped you, huh?"
"... Yes, but I'm sure he would have helped anyone that was in my state."
"Oh (y/n)," Peter tutted at me, "You are so blind. I remember a time when Petra got too drunk, and when she came back to base, Levi refused to be anywhere near her. He hates dealing with drunk people."
"Whatever, Peter." I wave off his insinuation, "Can we talk about something else now?"
"Want to tell me what happened with your hand when I handed you that drink." Peter studies me seriously.
"Nope, because there is nothing to talk about, Peter. I know you're used to dealing with my mother and her tremors, but just because my hand shook a little, it does not mean I have her illness." I say furiously to him. Maybe I'm being too harsh, but I'm fine. I haven't had anything like this happen before, so I will just take it as me being dehydrated and hungry.
"Okay," Peter raises his hands, "Don't shoot, you know I had to ask. But speaking of your family, you should let them see you before you leave tomorrow."
"Why? I'll be back before long; they won't even know I'm gone." I answer simply. I don't want them to worry about me, telling them will only cause them to worry needlessly. Plus my mother doesn't even know I'm in the scouts, telling her would be pointless since she would just forget I told her.
Peter just sighs at me, not bothering to argue anymore since he knows he won't get through to me. "I should go, I wanted to stop at the library before heading off to a briefing with my squad." As I get up from my seat, Peter gets up too and pulls me into a hug," Don't be reckless, okay? I know you're good, but you don't have to prove it. Just follow instructions and do what is asked of you, nothing more."
I nod and return his hug. I give him a final smile before I head out of his office, and make my way to the library.
Author's POV:
Reiner and Bertolt were pacing down the halls of HQ, nervous about the upcoming expedition. They have not been able to pinpoint exactly where Eren is going to be in formation. They kept getting conflicting information from others they have tried asking casually.
But it has been tough for them, they don't want to draw too much attention to themselves for trying to figure out where Eren is going to be. That will only cast suspicion on them, and everything will be ruined.
"Maybe we could just ask Eren directly," Bertolt suggested to Reiner, "I'm sure he would tell us without being suspicious."
"No," Reiner refused, "The higher-ups are watching his every move, he may not suspect anything, but someone else might."
They weren't only worried about being caught, but they were also worried about you. You're in Eren's squad after all, and when Annie shows up tomorrow, she will destroy anyone to get to Eren, that includes you too.
They both like you a lot and want to do what they can to make sure you're okay. But in this scenario, it doesn't seem like they have a choice. At the end of the day, if you get between them and Eren, there's nothing they can do.
"What about (y/n)?" Reiner asks, "She used to live in the capital right? Maybe she has read about what's outside the walls. Maybe she'll be willing to come with us."
"She doesn't remember everything," Bertolt argued, "We can't risk it."
As they were rounding the corner they didn't realize you were also rounding the same one, and they bumped right into you.
You were carrying a stack of books that went tumbling to the ground, "Shit," was all you muttered as you hurriedly tried to grab the books you dropped.
"Sorry (y/n)," Bertolt apologized to you, cheeks very red at this point, "Let me help you with those."
"It's okay," You smiled at the 2 guys, causing them to blush even more, "I got it."
"Doing a lot of reading before tomorrow?" Reiner asked you, trying to peek at the titles.
"Uh yeah," you say nervously, "Just doing some last-minute Titan reading, you know how it is."
Reiner gives you a confused look as he looks at some of the books you have in your arms, "Those are medical books..."
You froze for a minute, "Uh yeah, well I thought I should also refresh my medical mind a bit. Just in case anyone needs me."
"Are you okay?" Bertolt asks you, hearing the nervousness in your voice, "Are you scared about tomorrow?"
"Yeah, but I'm sure everyone is a little nervous right?"
"I suppose so," Reiner commented, "You'll be okay though right? I heard you guys were in the right flank up front."
"Um, I believe we're center rear in formation." You mumble in your haste to get away, "I really must be going, bye guys!"
You didn't realize what you had done, who you just gave your position away to. You didn't mean to, but now they both knew.
But they didn't know for sure if you were telling the truth about your position or not. And even if they knew you were being honest, there was no way they would be able to see Annie before the expedition tomorrow. They will have to wait until tomorrow to give Annie the heads-up.
They hoped you would be okay though; you're smart and fast. But so is Annie, and you had no idea what you would be up against.
Your POV:
I didn't want to read in the library, there were quite a few people there today. So I decided to bring them outside. It's a nice day out, and I have some time before my squad has to attend our final briefing.
I flip through the medical books I grabbed from the library, trying to see if I could find anything about my mother's illness. I know it's a rare disease, but maybe there's something written down somewhere in these books about it.
"(Y/n), what are you doing out here?" I jump when I hear Erwin's deep voice from behind me.
"Nothing sir," I smile nervously, "Just enjoying the weather and doing some light reading."
He looks at the rather large stack of books I have and laughs, "Light reading indeed." To my surprise, he sat down next to me and grabbed one of the books, "Medical textbooks? Are you prepping for the expedition?"
"Uh yeah, of course! I want to be useful out there after all." I reply, putting the book I had in my hand down.
"Has anyone told you you're a bad liar?" Erwin sighs at me but gives me a small smile.
"... Yes. But I am out of practice. I used to be good at it when I worked for Laurie." I reply, face going red in embarrassment.
"What's troubling you?" Erwin asked me gently.
"Please sir, it's nothing. You have enough going on without me unloading on you too." I try to reassure him.
"Erwin," He corrects me, "And you are one of the best, if there is anything I can do to help you, I will."
I pause at that. There's just something about Erwin that makes me want to tell him everything. Maybe it won't hurt to get his opinion.
"Well, it's probably nothing but earlier I was talking to Peter and when he handed me a glass of water, my hand trembled a bit and I ended up dropping it." I explain as I stare down at my hands, "Tremors were an early symptom for my mother. I remember when I was little she broke many a plate and cup. Nothing was safe."
I laugh a little at the memory, she would just say, 'Oops! clumsy me' and go about the rest of her day, not wanting me to worry about her. But thinking back on it, she must have been terrified; of not being able to control her own body. It was too difficult for my father to deal with anyway. I don't remember much of him, but I do remember him screaming at my mother many times. He would say she's crazy and leave again for a few more years.
"So, I'm doing my own research," I continue, looking around at the books I have by me, "I don't want to worry Peter or anyone else, especially since there really isn't a reason for them to panic yet."
"What are we looking for?" Erwin asked me as he picks up one of the books I have laid out around me. "No, Erwin, it's fine really. I'm sure you have a ton of other much more important things to do than sit and read with me." I appreciate his kindness, but I can't ask for his help, not when tomorrow is a very important day.
"I can't help you in any other way," He sighs, "You either have it or you don't. If it's the former, there isn't anything you can do. If it's the latter, there still really isn't anything you can do to help your mother. Either way, you're going to feel helpless, and if digging through medical textbooks will help ease your mind, I want to help."
As we flip through the pages, I notice Erwin staring at me out of the corner of his eye, giving me a weird expression. Kind of like he wants to say something, but doesn't know if he should or not.
"Ask me." I laugh, startling him a little.
"I shouldn't," He said, looking away from me again, "It's not my place."
"It's better than you staring at me out of the corner of your eye, and it's obviously bothering you. So go on, you have my permission." I smile at him, waiting for his question.
"When Levi took you to his room to look after you, he didn't do anything, did he?" Erwin asked nervously.
I was a bit surprised, I thought if anyone would defend Levi it would be Erwin. "No, Levi wouldn't do that," I answer, "I may not remember everything from last night, but that I can be sure of."
Erwin looks relieved and he gives me a genuine smile, which makes me blush and look back down at the open book on my lap.
"(Y/n)," It was a woman's voice calling for me this time. I look behind me and I can see Petra walking across the grass to where Erwin and I are sitting.
"What now?" I let out an exasperated sigh, what the hell does she want now?
"Can I please speak with you?" Petra asks tentatively, clearly nervous about approaching me.
Erwin stands up to let us speak privately. Petra salutes him politely before he walks off into HQ. Petra sits down next to me, in the spot Erwin just left.
She doesn't speak right away, just stared down at her fingers, pulling on them nervously. "Petra, if you're going to speak, speak. I don't have the patience to deal with you right now." I say as I let out an impatient sigh.
"Sorry," Petra said nervously, finally looking at me, "I just wanted to apologize for my behavior earlier. I've always been pretty jealous of your relationship with Levi."
"We don't have a relationship," I roll my eyes at her, "He's my superior, I'm his subordinate. That's our relationship, same as you."
Petra smiles at me sadly, "Maybe for now, but I can tell he feels something for you and I can tell you feel something for him too. I guess I just get frustrated when I see you 2 just having a casual conversation, both of you avoiding the obvious."
I let her words sink in. Do I have feelings for Levi? I certainly respect him as my superior and do consider him to be a friend as well. But do I feel anything past that?
"It's okay," Petra says gently, watching me closely, "I know you don't really like to talk about your past, especially Malcolm. But from what you have told me about him, I don't think he would mind if you moved on."
"You sound like Peter's ex-wife," I comment, "It's not that I feel guilty or anything. I just prefer to keep people at a distance when it comes to personal relationships. Many men had feelings for me when I worked in the capital, that was my job essentially. I suppose it's just a hard transition to make, letting myself feel such emotions again. But Levi isn't the only one I find myself thinking about."
Petra nodded, "Commander Erwin, right?"
"Yeah," I admit, "I like both of them, more than I would like to admit even to myself."
"Well, you're in a good position," Petra laughed, a little sadly, "I think those are the only men on base who have never shown any kind of interest toward anyone. You're definitely someone special to them."
"I'm sorry, Petra," I say to her, "If I've hurt you indirectly, I apologize for it."
"No, it's okay," She says as she puts her hand on mine, "I'll be fine, I finally have the confirmation I need to move on. Now, it's almost time for our last briefing! I'll help you carry your books, let's go."
I nod at her as she helps pile up the books I brought outside, and helped me carry them back to the library.
Author's POV:
By the end of the day, everyone knew their jobs, but only a few knew the real reason for the expedition. You spent much of your time working with and joking around with the members of your squad.
You were blissfully unaware of the hidden plot going on among the warriors from outside the wall. And the true nature of the expedition.
Levi and Erwin watched over you carefully, afraid of what may happen tomorrow. Neither one of them could stand the thought of losing you, and it worried them.
But it doesn't matter, everything will go the way it will go, despite their best efforts to protect you. You're a solider at heart, and you'll do whatever you think is best, no matter the cost to yourself.
Going to bed that night, your thoughts wandered to those who you have gotten pretty close with. Eren, the hot-headed Titan boy who's passion is almost palpable. The rest of the members of your squad, who you have joked with, drank with, and trained with.
Eld and Gunter have been like big brothers to you, helping you out whenever they could, and scolding you whenever you needed it.
Petra, who feels more like a sister to you. Even after the argument, you can't stay mad at her. Especially when she apologized as sincerely as she did, she really wants what's best for you, and you for her.
Even Oluo, the man who exposed your secret to everyone else on base. But he has been doing everything he can to make up for it, and you appreciate it.
Levi and Erwin, you know you have strong feelings for the 2 men, and you're worried about what may happen to them. Even though they are amongst the most capable soldiers there are, there will always be that little bit of fear in the back of your mind.
Sasha, your roommate, and friend. Annoying with her senseless chatter at times, even trying to pick certain food items off your plate when you're not looking. But you love her like a little sister.
The rest of Eren's friends you met over the course of your time there so far. You've become especially close with Armin because of your mutual love of learning and reading. You've also become pretty close with Reiner and Bertolt too. You think they're kind and very capable soldiers.
But they aren't soldiers. To their core, they are warriors, and they have a plan that must be carried out. No matter their personal feelings for you, or anyone else in the scouts. They have a job to do, and they must see it through.