Bleary-eyed and dog-tired, I push myself up on my so-called bed. I bawlled like a baby, while I wrote my final testament before parting ways with this world.
If you're wondering why I haven't chewed my legs like a rabid dog. It's because there is no point in doing so.
Knowing how to pick your battles, is crucial to victory. And I had no foot to stand on.
I had made my peace and accepted my fate. I saw no way out of my prison. I saw no way of breaking my chains and escaping my captors.
I stopped turning things around in my head. The way Asmara had relayed the news to me, sounded like my fate had been sealed.
Once again, tears streaked my eyes, staining the purple robe I was wearing. Not that it mattered but I tried to think of anything else other than what Mason was going through. It would have made matters much worse. I hadn't been able to go back to where I saw him last. I don't even know how I managed to achieve such a feat in the first place. So, I had no clue how to repeat it, even if I wanted to.
I'll probably haunt him, he was my unfinished business in this world. I suppose I would get my answers one way or another.
A deep breath to settle my restless nerves, and to clear my head once more. Other than writing my accounts of my miserable experience, there wasn't much else to distract me.
I thought of Laira, David, Enid, Ellie and the people who lived in the Quarter. I tried my best to be a good person. I tried my best to help. Even though at first I had resented Mason for pushing me into volunteering at the soup kitchen. I had grown to love it and enjoy my time spent there.
The shuffling of feet, makes me put down the pen and the little notebook they gifted me. I have visitors. I must make myself presentable.
I throw my legs over the edge of the rock ledge I've been using as a bed and wait. There is no point in doing more than that, and I have zero will and energy to do anything more.
After a few moments of waiting, Micah, Eagen and an older woman step into the light. She seems older than the girls that have bathed me, and wears a similar attire to the girls only this one is a shade of baby blue. Like Mason's eyes. My heart cracks at the reminder.
I swallow the knot lodged in my throat and wait for them to say something to me.
Once again, Micah looks around, just as disinterested as the first time. He has sharp features, a straight pointy nose and very narrow eyes as if he is permanently squinting.
" The full moon will occur in three days from now, " Micah begins, with a cursory glance my way," I want you to be prepared for what's to come. Asmara has informed me that she has revealed some details of the ritual, " He pauses when the woman takes a step forward and gives me a once over.
" I want you to understand that we are doing this for everyone's benefit," She closes her eyes as if trying to settle an internal struggle.
" I don't understand why you think murdering me is so necessary. I don't know what is that you want from me or Mason, but whatever it is," I pause to take a laboured breath. Even speaking a few sentences leaves me breathless. My body is caving, slowly but surely. I can feel that there is no strength in my bones. I haven't tried standing in a while, I don't even dare to attempt it, because I know I'll collapse in a heap on the floor.
" Let me speak to Mason, and I'm sure I can convince him to give it to you," I bury my face in my hands in an attempt to safeguard the little dignity I have left and keep myself from begging.
Micah scoffs," We can proceed, without the Seals of Yaruun. You speak as if you don't who you are and what threat you pose to this world," Newsflash. I had no idea what he was speaking of.
" Threat," I try to sound outraged, but fail miserably.
" Mr Kinnaird was supposed to bring you to us four months ago," Micah takes a deep breath and scrubs his cheek, a little exasperated.
" He has failed in his task to deliver you, and produce the Seals of Yaruun, " Mason was one of them.
" Is Mason one of your.....acolytes," I ventured a guess, waving my hand in their general direction to emphasise my point. Micah didn't seem in the mood to answer questions.
Micah lets out a humourless laughter, " Mason provides certain services for us. And has aided our endeavours over the years, and every single attempt we made into finding you. We have been looking for you for eighteen years. You shouldn't have been alive in the first place. But Anika and Hector believed differently," He pauses, probably realising his mistake.
" You knew my parents?" I try to push myself up and stand on shaky legs. That simple task took everything I had. Silence. But their silence speaks volumes.
" Anika was a T'aersy and Hector was a High J'aar," That didn't make any sense. In a split second, it dawns on me that it is their herachic system. T'aersy must be the lowest on the hierarchic ladder and it seems like my father had a high position.
I'm parched, I don't remember the last time I ate or drank but try nonetheless to swallow even if it feels like swallowing jagged rocks.
" I'm one of you?" I poke further and this time the woman steps closer.
" No," She looks over her shoulder at Micah, who nods," You are not one of ours. Anika and Hector are not your birth parents. It complicated. Long history. Have you eaten anything yet? You must keep your strength," That makes me laugh, but it comes out like a coughing hyena.
" Strenght? What for? So I can gleefully go to my death with a full belly and giggling. No, thank you. You're going to chop me to pieces whether I'm well and healthy or on my dying bed," At this point, my blood was boiling and I was in full-on crazy mode. My sarcasm had turned into dark cynicism.
" You're making us sound like we are monsters," Eagan bristles at me, while Micah raises a hand to make him stop speaking.
" Know your place V' asay," Micah takes a step forward and joins the woman before me.
His gaze clashes with mine, and I'm pretty sure I can see smoke come out of my ears reflected in his eyes. He has the audacity to justify his reasons for something I haven't done. It hasn't even crossed my mind to. Not even in my wildest imagination, have I ever thought of doing anything remotely malicious towards other people.
Except for Ava, but she deserved it.