Chereads / Don't Simp! / Chapter 13 - Pet Store

Chapter 13 - Pet Store

Inside the Pet Store, all manners of beasts exist. Four legs, wings, and all kinds of colors. Hans takes a gander at them thinking to himself of the most 'convenient pet' he can find.

Hans raises his hand trying to catch the attention of the store manager dozing off the counter. He knocks on the wooden table several times until the manager is awake. The manager opens his eyes and dully looks at him.

The manager tilts his head, and when his eyes finally land on Mira who is idly sightseeing the curious animals, he suddenly stands up and exorcises whatever sloth is taking control of his mind.

"Milady, what manner of beasts do you wish? Perhaps, may I interest you in rare species such as Fennec Fox, Hedgehogs, or do you fancy something else? We have the finest feline in all of City D, and I assure you that our commodities will not disappoint you."

It doesn't bother Hans that he is superbly ignored. However, that is not the case for Mira who feels that the manager is invading her personal space. Only through the slightest touch, she will suffer from one of her Geass. There are times that she purposefully makes herself dumb through the Geass Restrictions because it is being dumb is evidently a good disguise.

As someone who should not be 'around' and going to places, she makes it her priority to disguise herself such as the result of her playing dumb around Hans since the prior days when they are but merely fresh acquaintances.

Still, if Mira has a choice, she rather not suffer the fool in front of Hans. While she may go as low as becoming a 'commoner' to gain freedom, it doesn't mean that she no longer has pride.

Hans watches in amusement imagining how Mira will handle the situation.

The manager might be thinking of her as an easy target with a fat wallet. As women are the dominant majority of this world, it is obvious that it is women who should have more money. Though Mira's clothes appear humble, she is carrying around a PS5 that is only recently out on the market.

Hans who is plainly wearing his school uniform and carrying nothing is a lesser creature in the manager's eyes. Taking pleasure in the misfortune of Mira, Hans watches in silence. Lately, Hans is becoming more of a bully to Mira, not that he feels great pleasure in it, but just that it is stress-relieving.

In a twisted masochistic sense, Hans is similarly feeling good at being cussed back.

"You bastard, come help me." Losing her temper, she lashes out at Hans.

At the crude words coming out of her mouth, the manager finds himself flustered. Though the words are not for the manager to hear, the manager retreats in horror from Mira afraid to be the cause of offense.

Mira's gaze continues to bear on Hans.

"Fine," Hans nods his head with a slight chuckle dispelling the tense atmosphere. "So, Store Manager. Get me a convenient pet. One that is easy to feed, super cute, and will always follow me!"

The manager gets himself to work removing himself from the overbearing presence of Mira.

Through Hans's right eye, he sees the fluctuation of the energies around them aware of what might occur if he didn't step up. At times, Mira's emotions are quite random and sudden… just like this…

With the information available, it is safe to assume that Mira's self-dumbification through her Geass Restriction must be purposeful. More than once did Mira purposefully violate one of her particular Geass… which Hans can easily recall as in the past two weeks, she has at least violated the 'Physical Contact' rule more than five times.

Hans crosses his arm, and with a smug smile, he provokes Mira like it is an everyday thing.

"Why so moody? Is it period?"

There is no need to blush in shame. Mira believes that as someone who is of a mature mind, she should not fall to provocations this low. Clearly, the man, or boy, as she likes to 'degrade' Hans, must be up to something. There is a ploy, one that Mira won't indulge in.

Hans dramatically closes his mouth with both palms clasping his lips.

This annoys Mira, which prompts her. "What? Just what?"

As if waiting for this rhetoric, Hans bites off like a shark eager to consume the bait and the fisher that connects the man through the rod and string. "I am sorry, I might have offended you… I am really sorry…"

The apologetic tone doesn't help at all, as in the midst of a very short amount of silence, Hans cannot help but snicker with little tears from his eyes.

Hans adds cruelly. "You are in menopause long already. You can't be having a period right?"

A very not funny joke. Even Mira who is infinitely distanced from a male-dominated 'world', finds Hans' disgust and discrimination towards women to be so blatant it is starting to be hateful. At first, when she starts cohabitating with him, she is thinking that maybe Hans just swings on another way— a gay— who must be jealous of her womanly aspects.

But no.

Hans is just someone who takes joy in bullying her.

For this, Mira just has to endure for two years and lie low. Mira has her own agenda why she chooses to remain with Hans. The most urgent reason is that it is the best hiding place. Seeing Hans's credentials as an orphan and lacking any relatives, he is just the perfect fall guy.

Moreover, in the long term, it will be easy for Mira to fabricate a new identity through Hans's credentials. She can be a cousin, a sister, and even a fellow orphan sharing their mother's womb. No matter how ridiculous the background story that Mira thinks of, it will somehow work all thanks to Hans having nothing.

In the current time and age where the study of magic is booming, poverty is barely a problem, and orphans are so rare, someone like Hans is a very rare case.

"I will wait outside," Mira tells Hans and sets off to the doors just outside the Pet Store leaving Hans to fend for himself.

Arriving just right on time is the manager caring stacks of compilations of all manners of amazing pets from different species. "If you want loyal pets, dogs are the best! If you want something that you can worship for a lifetime, then cats are the best! Cats rule the world! Cats are omniscient! Worship them!"

Because of the too-fanatical and earnest advertising, Hans backs off feeling a bit scared. However, on second thoughts, Hans decides to screw with the manager.

"I want a feline… Someone loyal… Of course female. It should be able to play tricks and be easy to train. I want the kind that is clingy, and when happy, has its tail sway like a gyroscope. Of course, it should know how to play fetch. And maybe even able to get me a beer on Sundays. Of course, it should be efficient in digging bones. That will be pretty convenient in the future. In terms of aesthetic, I would want something that has its tongue sticking out."

"…"

Inwardly, the manager starts questioning his life. What does this dude really want? Dog or Cat? Hans can tell just by the crazy movement of the manager's eyes that he is lost. With a deadpan expression, the manager goes to the back of his shop.

When he returns, he is carrying three prospective pets. "You are lucky! We have just the right friends for you!" Carrying one under his armpit, carrying another one through his other arm, and another one playfully perching on his head. The manager introduces them one by one.

First is the golden furry under the manager's armpit. Its tail is like a gyroscope, it is cute, and its tongue is sticking out. It is all good except… it is a dog. No, it is a golden retriever. Hans sees the malicious smile of the manager of this petty revenge. The only thing that is cat-like to the dog is the cat ears toy headband on its head.

Second is… a freaking handsome tiger innocently lying on the manager's cradle. It tilts its head and releases its beautiful eyes of bewitching cuteness. If not for the big cat suddenly getting angry and clawing the manager's 'thing' midway, Hans would already pick up the tiger cub that is too playful for its own good. Hans winces in pain as he subtly gazes at the manager's 'thing' between his pair of legs. There has been a lot of blood initially, but… the manager heals fast.

For all that Hans knows, the technology of this world might be more advanced than his past world for example in terms of medicine, especially with the influence of magic.

Among the three prospective pets, only the normal cat remains. The cat, an Abyssinian, from the manager's head jumps off to Hans's embrace. Receiving the creature in his arms, Hans decides that this should be it. Handing his credit card, Hans finishes the transaction.

With a smile, Hans leaves the Pet Store. Before completely leaving, he feels that it is necessary he should ask. "Does it hurt?"

The manager simply smiles and gives a short explanation. If you are referring to the 'thing', I will tell you it doesn't. After all, I no longer have the 'thing'."

Hans freezes in fear and utter admiration. "Such professionalism and devotion to your work!" He exclaims ending the conversation with mixed emotions.

Swearing on his heart, Hans reminds himself to never get a job like a Pet Store employee.