(A/n: thoughts, *actions*)
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28 October 1505
06:43 a.m.
(Author POV.)
That morning, Lucrezia decided to talk to Matteo as soon as possible about going to live in the forest.
In the bedroom there were Lucrezia and Ofelia sleeping.
While Matteo; after the various quarrels with Lucrezia, went to sleep in the barn of Agata and Pietro, the latter learning of the difficulties that the couple was going to host him, hoping that after some time they would be reconciled.
(Lucrezia's POV. )
"*yawn*", I yawned, opened my eyes, and while I was still lying on the bed, I stretched out all my limbs, then turned my head looking for my little angel. Ofelia was still sleeping next to me.
I got out of bed and looked for slippers with my feet.
Then I stood up with my hands on the mattress, taking care not to wake Ofelia.
I walked to the kitchen, looking for something to fill my stomach, I found some dry bread from the day before, put it in a bowl and wet it with some milk, then sat down at the table and while I was having breakfast, I thought:
I have to convince him...mmm.. But what do I tell him?? It's risky. I rubbed my temples while I was trying to come up with some ideas.
Maybe ...if we went to live there only me and Ofelia...maybe, he could give us his permission to go to live in the forest. So Ofelia would be safer from the eyes and ears of others. But then? How will we get water and food? Where are we going to live?
"*uff*" Dried up, I got up from the chair, took the empty bowl and approached the tub full of water and washed it. I'm gonna have to come up with some ideas.
When I finished washing it, I dried it and put it back on the shelf. About an hour had passed, I left the kitchen and walked to the bedroom. I had to wake Ofelia.
"Ofelia... Ofelia" I said, as I gently shook her shoulders trying to wake her.
"mm. .no.. mommy, let me swleep.." she said, muttering, still half asleep.
"Come on, it's time to get up, don't you remember that we have to go and see the cows of Agata and Pietro?" I asked her, hiding a smile, 3.. 2...1. I mentally counted waiting for her reaction.
Here she is! , "YES! ,LET'S GO. LET'S GO MOMMY!!" Ofelia said, Sitting fast on the mattress and looking me in the eye. more awake than before.
"All right, but first I have to get you dressed," "All right, mommy," she answered, standing on the mattress and stretching her arms to the ceiling to get dressed.
When I finished dressing her, I went to wrap her eyes.
I took the bandage and I passed it behind her head, "mama.." "Yes, honey?" I asked her, stopping bandaging, to look into her eyes.
"Why does Ofelia have to cover her eyes?" she paused for a moment to catch her breath "... and why does Ofelia have to colour her hair?" She asked me, looking me in the eyes, looking for an answer.
My blood froze for a moment, I quickly sought an answer to her questions.
"er. .ehm.. Ofelia.." I was left speechless for a second, "Do you remember when mom told you that your hair and your eyes were different from others? And that you are my most precious treasure?" I asked her. " Yes! mommy!" she answered me smiling. " See...Mom is afraid that some bad person will take you away from her," I told her, hiding my tremblings hands in my sleeves.
"Why mommy?" Ofelia asked me again, not satisfied with my answer.
"You know mom is so lucky to have you Ofelia! , After all you are so cute and adorable!!! There are many people jealous of mom, they could kidnap you to make you their daughter," I told her pretending a smile.
Stop trembling stupid hands!!. I squeezed my hands, I made fists, I held them so tightly that my fingernails cut trough my skin; causing some blood to fall on the ground. I was terrified of losing Ofelia.
"Do you love Mother, Ofelia?" I asked her "Yes mama! Ofelia loves you so much!" she replied.
"And you don't want another woman to be your mom, do you, honey?" I asked her, in an attempt to stop the tears that were about to fall from my eyes. " NO MOMMY! OFELIA DOESN'T WANT ANOTHER MOMMY!!" She answered me screaming, she too about to cry. But for a different reason than mine.
Then I hugged her tightly against her chest and told her: "Mother loves you so much Ofelia... i dye your hair and cover your eyes to protect you from them. Will you do it for Mommy, honey?"
I asked her gently, failing to hold back the tears. "YES, MOMMY!" she answered me with her voice a little muffled because of the embrace. I held her until my eyes had finished shedding tears. Wiping my face with the sleeves of my dress, I freed her from my arms and bound her eyes.
We went to the kitchen and made her have breakfast and went to Agata and Pietro's house.
We arrived shortly after, we stopped at the door and waited. The door opened revealing Agata. "Goodmorning Lucrezia, Hi Ofelia! You're here for the cows, right!?" she said smiling, happy to see us.
"Yes, Agata it's like that. We had passed yesterday, but there was only Pietro in the house and I didn't want to disturb you." I said, smiling back.
"No trouble dear!. Come on! let's go to the cows, I bet Ofelia can't wait to pet them!" We followed her to the cow barn.
Ofelia entered the stable, caressing a cow, while Agata and I stood outside watching her play.
"Agata," I called her attention.
"Yes, Lucrezia?" Agata stared at me.
"I don't know how to thank you for Matteo," I said to her with my eyes watering, full of gratitude and sadness.
"You don't have to thank me Lucrezia. I know you're going through a hard time. Did you get a chance to talk to him?" she said, her expression turning into one of concern.
"I tried, Agata... Really,*sniff*... but he tells me it's nothing, that I'm imagining it. *sniff*.. It's my fault Agata...*sniff*, that I could not give him a son...*sniff*...that Ofelia was born different...*sniff*... I KNOW IT!!... And it breaks my heart... knowing that it's all on his shoulders.. *sniff*... I'm losing him Agata.. *sniff*.. AND IT'S ALL MY FAULT!!.. *sniff*.. *sniff*...". I was devastated both emotionally and physically, and I couldn't take it anymore."No, Lucrezia. Please don't cry, it's not your fault. God has a destiny for each of us and this is yours. It's all in the will of Lord Lucrezia, believe me. And all we have to do is to follow it". Agata said, trying to calm me down. But it had the opposite effect.
At those words my blood froze. That this was my destiny and that I could not change it? not even Ofelia's one?. Will I ever change them?I stopped crying and realized that Agata had never understood my situation. She had a different destiny from mine.
And then I wonder, Why did you abandon me God? Why do I have to carry this burden.That it's a punishment for something?. If so, then what should I do to protect those dear to me?...