He left the mansion, passing through the path behind the mansion near the forest where the stables were located, the sky was already getting darker with the sun getting lower.
As he walked he saw from a distance several luxurious carriages of other nobles. The Douglass family's anniversary was being celebrated tomorrow, so it was only natural that some nobles whose lands were located far from east Rosaenia would come the day before the main celebration to stay the night so as not to be late for the event.
Likewise with that man, Marques Gerald, a young Marquess from the western Rosaenia region which was quite far from eastern Rosaenia, of course the man came today to stay overnight.
Picking up the fodder and refilled the almost empty horse's feeder, his headache returned as the man's face flashed through his mind. Lucian's heart was beating fast, however regret overcame something warm that was building up in his chest.
Combing the horse's hair, the white horse that looked very healthy and beautiful reminded him of the horse in his old mansion.
All the property owned and the land of the Gifford family was confiscated by the duke after his father was discovered to have committed corruption and was the perpetrator of the murder of Marquess Edward Warrick and Johan Warrick.
He could not lie, Lucian missed his previous place.
His horse used to be white too, the one he liked to ride around the woods behind his mansion.
"That's also my sin," he muttered, combing the horse's hair, which seemed to glisten with its softness.
About two years ago was his first meeting with the son of Marquess Edward Warrick, at that time Lucian did not even realize that Marquess Gerald was the son of the man his father had killed.
Two years ago was the family anniversary when Earl Douglass was still alive, before he died of a long illness.
Lucian who was silent in his room, reading a book sitting by the window, occasionally he peeked out to see the front yard which was filled with many luxurious carriages from nobles and guests who were invited to the Douglass family's mansion.
His attention was interrupted when he heard a soft knock on the door. He paused, closing the book and placed it on the table.
Running as fast as he could to open the door, a man who was almost the same age as his father stood in front of his bedroom's entrance, a warm smile etched on the man's lips.
'Lucian, am I bothering you?'
'Not at all, I was just reading a book.'
'Do you want to eat with me? I know you don't really like crowds, but we can eat together, if you want.'
Lucian thought for a moment, these few years during his stay at the Douglass family mansion every time there was an event that invited noble guests, Lucian never wanted to participate. This habit had never changed even since before he moved to the Douglass family's mansion, when he was still living with his father, Lucian never wanted to go to nobles tea parties. His father never forced him to attend in every important event, maybe because his father was not too proud to have a son who was an omega.
But now the main reason why Lucian did not dare to show his face in front of other nobles was because he was a child of a criminal, almost everyone knew his father— Jake Gifford, was the perpetrator of the murder of Marquess Edward Warrick and his eldest son, Johan Warrick.
Many nobles did not clearly know the face of Jake Gifford's only son— Lucian could easily have hidden the fact that he was from the Gifford family considering that Lucian's face looked nothing like his father's. All his facial features, hair and eyes more closely resembled his mother who died long ago right after giving birth to him. On top of that, not many nobles recognize his mother either, there really was not any reason for him to be afraid of interacting with others outside.
Lucian could have faked his identity, kept his mouth shut and hidden his family name.
Earl Douglass knew that too, he had often told him that even though he was the son of a criminal, Lucian was completely innocent. Lucian did not deserve to be hated and had a chance to live happily. Earl Douglass thought Lucian's shy behavior and unwillingness to interact with others was due to his guilt because his father was a criminal.
Earl Douglass had no idea what was going on.
Lucian also sinned.
The rotten sin was not only his father's sin.
He was also a murderer. A cowardly sinner who always denied the mistakes he had made.
'Lucian?'
At the moment when Earl Douglass called his name again, Lucian's thoughts were interrupted, he shook his head. 'Sorry but I— …., I don't like being in crowded places, so I'll just eat alone ... I'm sorry.'
The older man though, smiled hearing his answer, the expression did not change even though Lucian rejected his kind gesture. He gently rubbed Lucian's cheek. "It's okay, dear. Don't force it, if you don't want to."
He closed the door silently after his hand gently ruffled Lucian's hair. Lucian felt his heart warm. The way Earl Douglass treated him like his own son made Lucian blush. He was not used to receiving such affection, so sometimes Lucian thought— ah, so this is how it feels to have a father.
He would never get used to this, walking back to the window, resting his hands against the windowsill. Faint sounds of chattering outside could be heard, the sky was also getting darker, Lucian decided to tidy up his room before going out for dinner.
The first time he met Earl Douglass was when he visited the Gifford family's mansion with the duke, that day was the day his father was arrested and detained, Lucian, who was sitting in his father's office to check some documents with Rogan, was surprised to hear the arrival of the duke of Rosaenia to his mansion. He already knew the penalty he would get, Lucian had already learned about it.
The punishment for a corrupt noble family was, all of their wealth would be confiscated. Lucian knew his destiny after this. He would leave this mansion because he no longer had the right to live here, unless he was able to pay the fine which was a very large amount, there was no way he could pay it soon. Bearing in mind, he was not very capable of doing investment and office work because his father had never taught Lucian about it.
He would probably live in the slum area. Lucian had resigned and accepted his fate, thinking that this was also one of the punishments for his sin, —even though Lucian deserved a worse punishment than this. He should have been with his father, receiving the death penalty for his sin as a murderer.
But Lucian was a coward.
--It's not my sin--
He repeatedly tried to convince himself that it was not his sin even though he was the one who helped his father with his own hands to commit the murder.
Lucian went outside, planning to respectfully greet the Duke and Earl of the Douglass family, but before he could go down the steps, he could hear the conversation of two men going on.
'I heard Jake has an omega son, what will happen to him?'
'The son who is an omega? What if we just marry him off to one of the alpha nobles ... Hm, but would anyone want to marry the son of an earl who is a corruptor and murderer?'
'Are you crazy? Marry? He is still young.'
'Then what is your solution for him, Michael Douglass? Should we just move him to another place, but that could be dangerous if someone finds out that he is the son of Jake Gifford, considering that many citizens are very angry about his corruption case. Given indirectly his son also enjoys wealth from his father's illicit property, even if it's not his fault, we can not control everyone's emotions.'
Lucian stood silently behind the pillar, hearing the conversation of the duke and earl Douglass, he knew that clearly. Even though he did not confess his sins, it was only natural that many people hate him simply because he was the son of Jake Gifford.
'Jake ... That bastard also has a human trafficking ring, how can we not realize this? Why did this slip so easily off our radar?'
'That's right. I know that information thanks to his second son, Gerald Warrick. He was the one who told me the reason why Jake Gifford killed his father because Edward had evidence that Jake Gifford was involved in human trafficking cases.'
That was new for Lucian.
He never knew exactly the real reason why his father wanted to kill Marquess Edward and his eldest son. This was the first time Lucian heard the real reason and his stomach suddenly felt queasy, as if the breakfast he ate this morning wanted to come out of his stomach, Lucian's face immediately turned pale. No way. He had killed a good man who was planning to save victims of human trafficking.
'How deep is the sin that I have committed?'
Lucian's legs weakened, he unable to bear the weight of his body to continue standing so he eventually collapsed to the floor. His stomach felt like it was boiling and he could not suppress his nausea. Body shook violently as he vomited all the food from his stomach. Again, and again. The two men who were conversing downstairs suddenly noticed Lucian, who was retching in agony. He kept vomiting until only gastric juice was coming out of his mouth.
Tap, tap, tap.
The sound of footsteps drew nearer, a hand reached out to him, rubbing his back gently. Two older men looked at him with a concerned expression. Lucian wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. He could also hear Rogan screaming in worry, getting closer to Lucian's position.
'Young master Lucian?'
Lucian lifted his face to find two older men and Rogan crouching around him, they were sincerely worried about his condition. Lucian's lips were blue with a paler complexion on his skin.