From: Yamaguchi
Tsuki? Are you free tonight?
Can we meet up ☹
I guess I can. Why?
What's up?
Yachi and I had a fight.
Okay. Let's meet at the usual pub.
I'm out in an hour.
I'll pick you up. Let's go together.
Thanks, Tsuki.
I put the phone in my pocket after reading Yamaguchi's last message thinking what might be the cause of their fight that never once happened when he was our captain and Yachi is our manager.
I shook my head when I thought how a simple label could change a good relationship and get back on doing my work. Time flies so fast and I'm done with my work. After reading Yamaguchi's text that he's close by I send Yachi a message about his dramatic boyfriend and hurriedly take my things and went off of work. I just got out of the office when my phone beeps once more thinking that it was Yamaguchi.
My brows creased when I saw Kiyoomi-san sent me a message. It has been three days since we last saw each other but I haven't asked him anything about the words he uttered. Or rather say, I don't have the courage to do so, coz it will surely change what I've been decided to do. If what I saw in my dream truly happened, then it'll be the answer why he's like this with me. Why he acts a lover more than a fuck buddy should.
From: Perverted Germaphobe
Can I stay over tonight?
I miss you.
I sighed on how weak my heart is when it comes to those words. Who would have thought that there are words better than 'I love you'?
I'll pick you up.
I immediately replied after that message of his. I don't know why he's easily gets irritated when it comes to Yamaguchi like what happened when we had a fight and also those phone calls that he answered for me, plus Yamaguchi doesn't know yet that I'm seeing Kiyoomi-san, so it's better to not let them meet yet.
No just wait me in my apartment.
I'll be having a drinking party with my workmates.
I know I lied and I'm breaking another one of his rules but I can't tell him that I'll be meeting Yamaguchi. He might misunderstand things again and it's a pain in the ass when he's mad, literally and figuratively.
"Tsuki!"
I saw Yamaguchi sitting at the planter box bench seat with his eyes red from crying.
"You looked like a mess." I said when I got close to him. He looked at me with tears clouded in his eyes like a kid.
"Tsuki!" He wailed and hugged me from my waist to my surprise but I just let him be
This guy is really a crybaby and overly dramatic at times. I sighed and ruffled his hair gently to calm him down while waiting for Yachi to come and pick him up. From her reply just a while ago, it seems that they're just having a misunderstanding.
It looks like this friend of mine tried to talk about marriage but got rejected. It's not that she doesn't want to marry him, Yachi thinks that it's still early for that. She wants to enjoy their dating life and settle down when they have enough savings for their future. He just over reacted.
"Tsuki, Yachi rejected me when I asked her when she does want to get married." He said after I gently pushed him from hugging me and sit beside him.
"Are you sure about that? Maybe you just misunderstood her?" I asked.
I guess I'm really over him when I don't feel the same pain from before even when I heard it directly from him. It's like as if he's not the man that I loved for years.
"I know it's still early to talk about marriage but what can I do, I just want to be with her more. We've been busy with our works lately and we rarely have time for each other." I got quiet when Yamaguchi said that, appreciating Kiyoomi-san's efforts to go back and forth here in Sendai to Tokyo whenever he misses me.
Wait. Then does that mean I'm being loved?
"Is that why you start this marriage thing conversation with her? If you miss her then why not just go to her place? She's not living far you know? Make an effort." I rebuked him for making it a big deal and almost blurted how Kiyoomi-san makes an effort just to see me.
Yamaguchi faced me looking gross with his snots and tears. "It's not it Tsuki. I want to keep her you know. That's why I opened up about this marriage thing with her."
I got silent on his choice of words making me bothered once more to that dream and Kiyoomi-san's words when he was half asleep.
"What do you mean you want to keep her?" I asked almost like a whisper but enough for him to hear.
He sighed. "Tsuki, when you're in love. You either want to own that person or you want to keep her."
My brows crinkled. "What's the difference?"
Yamaguchi smiled at me. "'Owning' is like making that person your possession and at some point, it's destructive. While 'Keeping' is a little bit different with owning though they have similar meanings but this one, you're protecting your possession while giving it freedom at the same time."
I got silenced with his words while remembering the note that I saw that day. It was like that person is telling me 'I want to protect you so be mine instead'.
Can I keep you?
Fuzzy memories of that night flashes to my mind, making me stands on my seat startling Yamaguchi.
"I'm sorry Yamaguchi. I need to go home now. There's something that I need to do. Let's drink next time okay? And wait here. Yachi's on her way." I said and left him confused on my action.
I took my phone in my bag and hurriedly call Kiyoomi-san making sure that he's at my apartment now.
"Kiyoomi-san where are-"
Before I could ask, I already saw him across the street walking towards the station. I was trying to reach him but stopped on my feet when he spoke at the other line.
"You don't really have to lie to me you know. I get it Kei. I'm already aware that someone owns your heart already and I'm trying my best not to mind that. But Kei... Why do you have to lie?" He asked in a defeated voice.
Not again. This dummy really doesn't listen to anything when he's like this.
"H-hey Kiyoomi-san stop will you first please stop leaving and come back. Let's talk alright?" I said still chasing him and almost cussed out loud when got caught by the stoplight.
He laughed dryly. "What for? You're with him, right? You're with the person you love. I'm tired Kei. Let's talk next time."
And before I could even explain, he already ended the call.
Fuck! When is that next time? You sounded like there's no next time, this time. I said in mind while keep on chasing him.
I tried to run as fast as I could but just when I thought that I almost reach him...
A loud bang was heard after a deafening screeched and the next thing I knew, Kiyoomi-san's unconscious body is laying on the cold concrete road painted with a pool of blood.