We were at the second dress shop and I was fidgeting in the mirror of my dressing room wearing a skimpy red dress. The first shop had nothing Eros liked and this one he basically threw me in a room with four red dresses to try on. I think he has a thing for the color red.
"Any day now, Ella." Eros was outside the dressing rooms yelling at me. The lady checking in the clothes wouldn't let him come back here and she was now my favorite person.
He probably would had come in here with me and forced me into these dresses. I of course would get all heated and just let him so I could steal a few of his touches. God, why am I so hopeless.
I took a deep breath and walked out. I already ran through fifty negative comments he would say to me and I thought I was prepared for anything that would come out his mouth. I was wrong though.
"Fuck me, you actually look hot baby girl." Eros bit his fist raking his eyes up and down my body. I didn't miss the scuff from the dressing room attendant either. She clearly didn't like how Eros talked to me, and I didn't blame her.
"Thanks, I guess." I scrunched my eyebrows and walked to the three mirrors with a little platform. My fingers ran along the side of my thigh nervously. I can not wear this, ever. My breast were nearly busting out the front, my ass looked huge, and if I bent over you would definitely see my underwear. There was no sleeves or straps and way more than half my skin was on display for all the world to gawk at me like some sex in heels toy to play with.
Eros of course stepped up on the platform positioning his body directly behind me. I glanced at us in the mirror getting lost in the way we looked together. His eyes were glued to my body, which I did like, but I didn't want everyone looking at me like that.
His lips came to my ears as our eyes meet through the mirror. He was doing that thing to my body again. The one that made me putty in his hands. "You actually look fuckable now, Ella." I could see the carnal hunger in his eyes, but the words he just spoke instantly had me in tears. He would be perfect, if he just didn't speak.
"We look good....."
I elbowed him hard in the stomach before he could finish whatever crude sexist bullshit he was about to say.
"I hate you." I said through gritted teeth as a tear fell from my eye. I saw his face drop in guilt, but I was done caring what he thought. I wasn't some object for him to dress up and gawk over. This was my body and I would wear clothes to actually cover it. I didn't need the whole world seeing every inch of my skin just to be some sex icon for them to drool over.
I grabbed a blue dress from the rack with short sleeves and a skirt that would reach just above my knees. I went back to the dressing room and tried it on satisfied how it looked. I didn't bother to show Eros either. He only cared about how much skin I flaunted. Unlike Eros, attracting someone to me wasn't all about sex and nothing else.
I just wanted someone to love me, yet I was beginning to believe that didn't exist. All everyone cared about was how hot someone was. All they talked about in school was how big the guy's dick were or how easy the girls put out. I was curious about sex and definitely thought about it. I just didn't want only sex from a guy. I never understood why that made me a freak either. I can't be the only nineteen year old that thought this way.
"Hey, Ella!" Eros chased after me as I walked passed him from the dressing room back in my black sweater and red leggings.
I dropped the dress on the counter and pulled out my credit card. He wasn't buying anything for me.
"Hey, I'm sorry. I don't know what I did, but I know you're upset." His eyes were light green and looking at me with so much guilt. A part of me wanted to cave but I couldn't do this anymore. I wasn't his toy, I was a real
person with real emotions that he constantly played with.
The woman from the dressing room laughed at Eros as she rang up the dress. She obviously understood why I was mad. She was in her late thirties so that is probably why she was more mature then the kids my age.
"Just leave it, Eros. We need to find this key and get that stupid bag and then we can go back to ignoring each other." I held out my card for the cashier and Eros put my hand down offering his.
"I said I would buy it for you."
"I don't need you to buy me anything. If you haven't noticed my dad makes a shit load of money and gives me anything I want."
The cashier took my card and swiped it for payment. Eros gave her a nasty glare then put away his card. I'm sure other girls felt privileged to have him pay for things but I wasn't looking for any special treatment from him.
"Ella, I'm sorry, ok." Eros tried again to apologize on the way home.
"I heard you, but you don't even know why I'm upset. It doesn't count when you say you're sorry just to stop me from being mad at you."
Eros thought a few moments. "I thought that was the point. Women get pissed, men randomly apologize, and all is good again."
"Well, that is probably why you constantly piss off Chrissy and she breaks up with you every other week. Try learning why you pissed off a woman and don't do it again."
"Chrissy gets pissed because she wants more than I'll give her. I don't care if she gets pissed anyways."
"But you care if I do?"
He clenched he jaw. "That's not what I was saying."
"What are you saying Eros, because nothing you say ever makes any sense."
"I'm saying I don't know why you're upset. Can you just tell me and we can be done with this stupid fight?" His hand was gripping the steering wheel now. So, I guess he does care if I'm mad at him. Why would he not want to upset me but with his girlfriend it meant nothing?
"First you said I actually look hot. Which I'm use to the back handed comments from you and can ignore, but then you said I actually look fuckable. So, what you're saying is a guy only wants to touch me if I'm in some skimpy dress looking like a whore. My everyday self isn't good enough for you or anyone else. You're saying I'm not good enough being just me. Second of all I don't need to look fuckable and even if I did wear a skimpy dress it doesn't mean I want you to fuck me or that you have the right to gawk over my body like some object." I took a deep breath after my rant. I really wasn't sure if I even made any sense. I was just so mad at how he treated me.
"Wow! Is that the first time you said fuck, Ella? You said it a lot too." He chuckled watching in front of him as we pulled in my driveway.
"I hate you!" I screamed punching him in the shoulder. "You such an arrogant jerk Eros Declare!" I continued to shout smacking his arm as he held them up to protect his head.
"Whoa! Calm down! I was just joking."
"God you're irritating!" I opened the door and jumped out the door. I of course nearly nose dived but luckily my dad was there to catch me. The look on his face was murderous as he stared at Eros.
"I told you not to mess with my little girl." My dad's voice was deep and threatening.
"I complimented her and she took it the wrong way, Aaron. She's sensitive, I get it and I'm sorry."
"You little punk." My dad moved to rip Eros out the car.
"Daddy it's fine. I just lost my temper, that's all. Eros has a way of bringing out the worst in me." I glared at Eros making him take a hard gulp. "We got a new lead today." I smiled big at my dad hoping to dissolve some of his anger.
"I want to know what is going on and I will help Eros from now on. You don't need to be dealing with this or him." My dad pointed at Eros like he just ordered his death. Oh god, this was not good.
Eros sat in his jeep speechless. This might be the first time his killer smile or quick tongue didn't get him out of trouble. I grabbed the bag out of the back not looking at him. I couldn't handle all the tension between us right now.
"I'm really sorry, Ella." Eros said then reversed out of my driveway.
"You're not going anywhere with him ever again, Ella. I'll handle this from now on."
"Daddy, I said it's ok. I can handle Eros and I need to clean up this mess Damien put us all in. It's not fair to make Eros do it just because he is a jerk." That sounded wrong. He was helping me, but he was a jerk. See! Eros made no sense.
"Let's go inside and talk. I don't want to see you upset princess." He put his arm around me and we walked inside. I glanced back at Eros standing by his front door watching us. I did feel a little bad even though I shouldn't.
"I know and I love that about you, daddy." I leaned my head to his shoulder and we walked inside.