King's Landing was already packed when we arrived, with virtually every noble in all the Seven Kingdoms making the journey. A royal wedding alone would have been enough of an occasion for many of them to make the trip but given the recent change in dynasties, everyone wanted to feel out their new king themselves and the crown was also inclined to get as many fealty oaths in person as possible.
Fortunately, we owned a large estate in the city so figuring out lodgings for those in our party who didn't rate quarters in the Red Keep wasn't an issue.
The city still smelled like a massive shithole though, thank the gods that I didn't have to live here. That would have resulted in me tapping the Rock's vaults to pretty much tear down and rebuild the whole city with a proper sewer system.
Still, the week leading up to the wedding proper passed quickly even if little of note occurred. The one exception was the tourney that we were throwing in honor of the wedding, with prizes totaling thirty thousand dragons. I would have much preferred to watch but, sadly for me, refusing to participate would simply be far too out of character. Well that and even with my new memories I still felt the same thrill I always had when thinking about the tourney grounds.
My first opponent for the joust was Ronald Westly, a minor knight from the Crownlands and a recently pardoned Targaryen loyalist. To my critical eyes his form was flawed, and those experienced eyes were proven correct when my destrier charged down the list at nearly thirty miles per hour and my hand tilted my lance just so, causing it to slip past Westly's shield and strike true against his chest. He was carried clean off his horse even as the shock of the strike was channeled through my armor. He was just the first of many to fall to my lance throughout the day until, with the sun setting off to my right, it was just Lord Yohn Royce sitting astride his horse and blocking my path to victory.
The first pass was his point by the smallest of margins, his shield was positioned just so and my lance shattered. If the point had struck and inch either side, but that is pointless wishing. The second pass was a draw, both our lances sliding off the others shield. On the third and final pass though my lance struck true and he was unhorsed.
Receiving the wreath of roses that was my, non-monetary, prize I rode over to the royal box and bowed slightly to the king before turning to Cersei "As practice for the crown you will wear two days hence, and every day thereafter, I would offer the fairest maid in all of Westeros this crown of roses to wear upon her brow." I said, laying on the flowery speech, as I presented the wreath to her and named her the queen of love and beauty for the tournament.
The melee the next day was interesting given that Robert was participating. My Kingsguard instincts had me slotting in as partner to Ser Barristan as we worked to make sure that those former Targaryen supporters wouldn't have the opportunity to approach the King. It was safe enough for him to spar with those who had supported him, they were unlikely to try and splatter Robert's brains across the ground, but I still wish he had stayed in the stands. In the end Selmey went down to an underhanded blow from a Reach knight to his back. After quickly disarming the Reach Knight, and leaving him with a broken nose from a whack across the face with my blunted blade, it was just Robert and I left standing.
He was amazingly skilled with his hammer, wielding it with the ease of long practice and at least as much natural talent as I had for the sword. If I had been fighting to win it would have been a tossup, one that probably favored Robert as much as it galled me to admit, but instead I deliberately interposed my blade infront of a hammer strike after about ten minutes of a back and forth duel. I could have angled the blade and diverted the strike but instead I let his strike hit straight on, shattering my blade and giving me all the excuse I needed to say "I yield your Grace." before removing my helm.
He gave a boisterous laugh and removed his own helm before holding out an arm for a forearm clasp "Good match Kingslayer, unlike most of these pansies you are least tried to fight seriously."
I smiled back "Once you've taken the head of a King, I've found it much less stressful to cross blades - or hammers - with one on the tourney ground."
The stands suddenly quieted and it seemed like everyone was holding their breath, wondering how Robert were respond to that sentence. Fortunately for me, he did what I expected and laughed even louder "Good one Kingslayer, we'll have to spar while you are in this shit hole I call my capital."
I gave a nod "It would be my honor, Your Grace."
Now here I was, standing at the front of the Great Sept of Baelor as Tywin walked Cersei down the aisle. She was a vision of radiant beauty, clothed in a dress of the finest white silk lace woven through with strands of gold to accentuate the look. Listening to the High Septon blather on and on as he officiated was doing nothing to increase my faith in the Seven, actually it just confirmed my inclination to try and break that religion. Although that had more to do with the knowledge that many of my future plans were unlikely to go over well with the Faith than my being unimpressed with its ceremonies.
Eventually though His Blathery-ness reached the important bit and said "Who offers this women in marriage before the eyes of the Seven Who Are One?"
Tywin stepped up then said "I, Tywin son of Tytos of House Lannister, Lord of Casterly Rock, and Warden of the West offer my daughter Cersei, true born and pure, for marriage before the eyes of the Seven." as he removed the nearly ten foot long cloak of white and gold from her shoulders.
The Septon gave a solemn nod of the head before turning back to the audience and booming out "And who should stand before the Seven Who are One and offer to take Cersei, trueborn daughter of Tywin of House Lannister, under his protection?
Robert took a step forward then and said "I, Robert of the House Baratheon, the First of My Name, King of the Andals and the First Men, Lord of the Seven Kingdoms and Protector of the Realm, offer Cersei, daughter of Tywin of House Lannister, the succor of my cloak."
"Then before the eyes of the Seven and with these men standing witness, clothe her in your cloak so that all men will hence forth know that she stands as wife of King Robert of the House Baratheon." the Septon said.
A moment later Robert had cloaked her and the applause started. Then came the processional back to the Red Keep and the wedding feast, complete with dancing.
With Robert's marriage I had just become the most eligible bachelor in Westeros and so had to put up with every noble daughter trying to woo me into making her the future Lady of Casterly Rock. Before my recent change I had already considered the vapid mewlings of so called noble women tedious at best. One of the reasons that I loved my sister was that she at least had a brain and wasn't afraid to speak her mind or do as she willed. I had never told my father but I had actually been relived to be made a member of the Kingsguard as it meant I would never have to marry some women of my fathers choosing who I would probably despise - and certainly not love.
After my change, well I refused to marry anyone I did not consider my equal. It was pity that Olenna Tyrell was sixty and already married, for my generations noble daughters were sorely lacking in anything beyond decent looks - and I could still find prettier in a brothel if that was my only criteria.
Eventually though the bedding took place, a truly barbaric custom in my opinion, and one could disappear off to their own quarters without offering insult.
Father, Kevan, and I could be found in his sitting room soon after, and as he handed me a glass of brandy I held it up in salute "And so Cersei becomes Queen."
He smiled, a true smile the likes of which I could remember seeing perhaps half a dozen times before in my entire life, and held up his own glass "My grandson will be king someday."
Kevan gave a nod and said "Quite the change from fathers day Tywin." before taking a sip of his drink.
Tywin actually snorted at that, the first one of those I had ever heard out of the man "Thankfully his idiocy didn't breed true.", facing me he continued "Tell me Jaime, you've had a month of the job; so what do you think of ruling the Westerlands?"
I gave a wry smile "That I'm glad you are in good health and I can look forward to many more years before it becomes my responsibility full time. And that when I do, I will be just as glad to have a brother as competent to rely on like you have relied upon uncle Kevan", I turned to him at that and held up my glass in small salute.
Tywin grimaced slightly at the reference to my brother but must have been even happier than he appeared at Cersei's becoming queen as he said "When he's not drunk and passed out in a whores bosom, his blood does show true."
Deciding to move onto a safer topic I said to Kevan "Happy to be Master of Laws?"
He chuckled sourly at that before saying sarcastically "Oh yes, thank you so very much for that suggestion nephew. My brother here", he turned to glare at Tywin, "has decided that I should go through and redraft the entire legal code. He wanted to do it as Hand but Aerys would never let him, and now he sees an opportunity to make me do all the work"
I cocked an eyebrow, thought for a moment, and then said "I agree with him, the current legal code is a mess of contradictions and exceptions. Even if no one of note actually cares one whit what the laws actually are, the merchants and lesser nobility do have to obey them and compliance does end up costing gold. A cleaner legal code should increase the crowns revenues nicely on its own."
Tywin nodded sharply at that, seems I had hit on the reason he had wanted to update the laws, while Kevan sighed and said "Yes, yes, I know. I'm really just bitching because I now have to live in this shithole."
I chuckled at that and Tywin laughed even louder "Why do you think I was out of the capital every chance I got as Hand?"
A moment later though I said in a musing tone "As Master of Laws you will control the Gold Cloaks."
"Yes...?" Kevan said, clearly not saying 'no duh you idiot, where are you going with this?'
I shrugged slightly "Well if they are staffed by men who won't take bribes and you happened to include some laws dealing with fire risk or minimum construction standards for buildings, you could probably condemn most of Flea Bottom. Perhaps establish a fire brigade as an adjunct to the Gold Cloaks and require that every building in the city be certified by them as safe or be torn down."
Kevan looked at me cross eyed and said "And what is worth the inevitable riot that would cause?"
I flicked my eyes at Tywin for a moment before returning them to Kevan and saying "Well it would provide the justification for Robert to give House Lannister the land in exchange for us agreeing to rebuild it and redo the entire sewer and water systems for all of Kings Landing. He doesn't like the smell any better than you do."
Kevan looked at Tywin who sat there, swirling his brandy glass, for about fifteen seconds before saying "Expensive, doing it right would require tearing down and rebuilding much of the city."
I gave a nod "Yes, it would. Probably more expensive than could be justified from the rents we would collect from the rebuilt Flea Bottom, but it isn't really about money. In a generation a Lannister, regardless of his actual name, will call this place his capital and I won't have it be joked that a Lion rules from a dung heap.", choosing to appeal to his fetish for our house being respected instead of trying to explain how proper sewers reduced disease - and refusing to mention anywhere that I wasn't sure was secure that rebuilding would let us build all the secret passages.
Tywin gave me a slight nod and said "I'll think about it."
The three of us spent the next hour chatting, mostly about what I had been doing at the Rock - Tywin looked favorably on my idea for a semaphore system - and the political machinations that had occurred in King's Landing since Robert took the throne before we broke up.
That was the last time I would speak to my father, for five hours later I snuck into his room through one of the secret passages with a cloth dosed in a substance that the maesters called khum and seemed to share many of the properties of ether or chloroform, being used as an inhaled anesthesia drug. He barely struggled as I held it over his face, and once his struggling ceased entirely I removed it and replaced it with his pillow. After almost five minutes I checked his pulse, Tywin Lannister was dead.
Returning his pillow to its regular place I positioned his head so that he was largely face down in the pillow and then retreated back through the secret passageway to my neighboring room. The khum soaked cloth went into my fireplace where it rapidly burned to so much ash and I went to bed.
A servants scream would wake me the next morning and I would rush into Tywin's room, sword in hand. It was a tragic stroke causing him to unfortunately suffocate himself on his pillow the Grand Maester would rule after a cursory examination.
I had never really loved my father, I respected him but the last flickering embers of love had died with the Tysha incident, and my other memories had done nothing to rekindle that love. So when I had come to the conclusion that my plans were better served without Tywin in the picture, well I had decided to remove him. I had thought about framing Dorne but a war with them right now just didn't have any real upside and so an accident it was.
When Cersei and Robert showed up, she had whispered in my ear while hugging me in her "grief", "He called the Stark bitches name even as he took me.".
I whispered back "The servants are being trained even as we speak, give him an heir and a spare and give the Kingdoms a few years to recover from the Rebellion and a Lannister might just kill a second king in this pile of stone."
The smile she gave as she leaned back from the hug and looked me in the eye made it plain that she would hold me to that implicit promise.
Turning to face Robert I said "Your Grace, my sister was just expressing her regret that she can't bare to be parted from your side with the two of you so newly wed and so won't be able to attend our fathers funeral.", going to one knee and crossing an arm across my chest in salute I continued "To save her from this quandary, I would beg you grant House Lannister the boon of accepting an invitation to Casterly Rock."
"Balls man, get up!" he said, reaching down to clasp my arm and pull me back to your feet. "Giving me an excuse Jon can't shoot down to get out of this shithole for a time is you doing me a favor, not the other way around. Besides, I would be inclined to attend Tywin's funeral and pay my respects anyways, he was a great man."
He seemed lost in a memory for a moment, before saying "And a great king." with a chuckle.
I blinked at that and questioned, "Your Grace?"
He waved a hand and said "When we were young my father brought Stannis and I to court and we saw the king. The two of us agreed that the king had been as noble as the dragons were fearsome, only for out father to tell us years later that Aerys had cut himself on the throne earlier that day and his Hand was filling in."
I smiled and gave a chuckle of my own "I doubt that you could have payed him any higher complement."
We ended up departing King's Landing in almost unseemly haste, Robert really did not like the city and had us all out the door the next morning despite Jon's protestations that it would appear he was fleeing his own wedding reception.
-x-x-x-