"What is happening? Why are you crying?"
Xander arrived at the scene but found me outside crying. I was ashamed to look at him. I had done a grave mistake to my sister. Pushing her to her fall and the fatal bleeding. I hope the baby is still safe. I don't know what will happen to me. I can't even face Xander and tell him anything. He squats to my position and removes my hands from my eyes as he stares at me. My eyes are moist and it's hard for me to look at him. He extends his hands but I don't want him to touch me. I stand up and point to him in the direction where he is supposed to head to. Our neighbours open their curtains and look at us. I know this is not good. If they see Xander trying to be friendly with me or touch me in any way, they are going to tell Josh. They are so nossy for me, they love putting their noses in people's problems even though it doesn't concern them.
This is the same scenario when my neighbour Pete, tried to ask for some tea bags since he didn't have some. They didn't hesitate to tell Josh that I was laughing and flirting with Pete.
"Is everything okay with you? I know Kendra is hurting but what about you?" Xander asked.
Why is he still here? He should be inside the house looking after his wife who maybe has lost their only child. I brushed my tears and blew my nose on the hem of his t_shirt, "I am sorry, I didn't mean to push her." After saying that, I rushed from his presence and went in an unknown direction. I wanted to be far from them, just far away, but how far was I going to yet I had no place to hide?
Standing at a safe distance, I watched as Xander was holding Kendra from the door and his guards quickly opened the door. He didn't care whether she had blood stained all over the place or she was dirty, he carried her. Kendra was leaning on his chest, crying, while the neighbours looked at her.
"Josh, what happened? Josh, is everything fine?" the neighbours were asking. Josh stood there while looking at Kendra. He walked to the car and was allowed in. I didn't know what to say. I was just there, looking at everyone but deep down I felt guilty for all this. I was the one who pushed her, maybe Kendra was right, maybe I will destroy everything, I will mess everything up for her. I need to go far, but where?
"Hello, are you okay? I have seen Your boyfriend escort your bleeding sister inside the car." That is Big Mouth. I call her Big Mouth because she never misses asking about everything and knows everything that is happening in every household. She will tell you how the neighbours in Number seven fuck each other and how number one is having a neighbour's baby and her husband thinks it's his. I looked at her and walked back to the house, " I hope you didn't cause this one, you always trouble a causing young lady!"
Lord, I hate her fake British accent. I pushed the door and the sight of red on the floor caught my eye. I watched as some blood was spreading towards the table and some were smeared on the wall, maybe that was Kendra while trying to stand up.
'What did you do, Vee? What did you do? Mrs. White is going to get mad at you! You have just killed her grandchild, Sofie might deny you the job and you will be back to your yr sister who won't even want to look at you in the face!'
I don't know what to do, I feel the tears on my cheeks, this is my punishment, not painful enough. The way Xander carried her tells me how much he was frustrated with the news.
Picking a mop and bucket, I decided to do some cleaning. Washing through the whole house and using bleach on the floor and the walls to make sure the whole house was clean before Josh comes back. I hate the way the red blood was splattering on my face, the way the stain was slippery on the floor. I hated it, I still had to clean the floor no matter what.
Done with everything, I had nowhere to go. By now, the whole family knows and Sofie might storm in here any minute. If not Sofie, Xander might jump here and choke me to death. Worse, Mrs white, will slam my name and call me an abomination if there is even something like that. I walk over to the kitchen but I don't feel like taking anything. I don't have anyone to at least keep me company, I am just there, uninformed of what is going on, unsure of what I should do. Maybe I should pen a sorry, heart_touching letter to my sister. She might forgive me, but she will never forget about it. She will always be reminding me that I caused all that.
Switching on the television, nothing was interesting for me to look at. My brain was running from North to South, East to West trying to know what happened. I wanted to know what is the situation with Kendra. I wanted to be positive that her baby is safe but at the same time, I couldn't cross my fingers and have some little faith in that. Maybe I should sleep, that is the only option that I have.
Closing the television that was now making noise, I started off to the bedroom but a knock on the door startled me. I peeped through the keyhole and took a look, Step_mom?
My heart started racing, the second knock came out more like a bang. I peeped through the window, the neighbours were still there staring, I quickly opened the door and let it be. She might as well beat me up so that I can have some sense in my brain.
The minute the door opened, she didn't wait even for me to say anything. Her handbag came flying on my head while her car keys were on my cheeks slicing the old wound where a bowl had sliced creating a new wound. Maybe I deserve that, but do I deserve the slicing and these wounds?
"You couldn't be happy for her? You couldn't be happy for her? You made sure you snatched the only thing that made her happy! The same way your mother did to me, the same way she took everything away! Fucking bastard!" Her voice was high, she didn't bother to close the door. I was used to her beating me, except for the keys slicing my cheeks, that was a new one. Big Mouth stood by the door watching as she beat me up, she didn't say anything. She can as well gather some information and remember to anchor them at the apartment platforms when she is doing her laundry or& watering her flowers tomorrow morning.
All this time, I used my hands as a shield to protect myself from her beatings, bag rings hit my hands, while the two G's of the Gucci bag hit my head.
"Ma'am, what's wrong, why are you beating her like that?" that was Big Mouth's best friend, Whisper, she peeped through the door and walked in.
My mother stopped beating me and looked at them, I could hear her pathetic tears falling out of her eyes. She sniffed and threw the bag down. It looked like she was going to pass out any minute, she placed her hands on her chest and looked at Whisper, Big mouth walked over to her as their small kids with mucus on their noses and some nodules dried on their fingers were peeping trying to see what was happening.
"Imagine, imagine," she started while holding her chest, trying to calm down, "this little stupid bastard here, had forced my daughter to have a miscarriage. She just pushed her though she knew she was pregnant. My daughter has lost her only baby, the only thing that she was excited about. The doctors have said," she paused there. I was now alert. The part where Kendra had lost her baby was hurting, I can't imagine how it feels to lose your child but what had the doctor said? I hope they said the baby can still grow, maybe a miracle from Lord who has never given me a miracle, not even collecting a cent from the road.
Whisper and Big Mouth walked closer to her and calmed her down, they helped her sit down while they left me on the floor bruised. Whisper got her a glass of water while Big mouth calmed her down while patted her shoulders.
"What are you looking at, you pathetic little piece of shiet?" my step_mother jumped from Whisper, she grabbed my legs and drag me across the floor. One blow on my stomach and another blow on my cheeks and my lips were busted blood oozed from both lips. The problem is if you've been used to beatings and pain, you don't even feel a thing. All you feel is your body is accustomed to it all. That is part of daily life. It's nothing out of the ordinary.
I rolled over the floor and kissed the bleach that I had used to mop the blood. Fuck, I hate this, I hated that it touched my mouth. I quickly wiped it out while removing the blood from my lips using the clothes on my body.
She dragged me from the table and made me face her, she held me by the collar facing her as the collar choked on my neck, I felt the air escape through my neck and I could t do anything.
"It is because of you, she will never give birth again, her uterus is ripped, and she is hurting in a hospital bed. You didn't want her to be happy!"
"I am sorry, I didn't mean it, I didn't mean for that to happen."
Maybe I am stupid but this was very stupid of me. I should have done something else apart from pushing her, I should have let her trail her fingers and touch what she wanted to touch. Do you know how that feels when someone wants to touch you by Force? Maybe they should ask for my side of the story, they don't need to, I did a mistake, and I should pay for it and accept that I am wrong.