'When one gets treated with love will they learn how to love too.'
I don't know if what am doing is right or wrong but really, I don't even know if I still have it in me to realize what is right or wrong anymore.
Lucas got into my head and as I tried to think about what he told me, I could feel my head spinning to almost shutting down.
I don't want to consider that my sister shared the same womb at the same time, that we share the same features, same genes are capable of getting jealous of me.
I mean what is that that I have that she wants? And the sad part about everything is that I can't ask her, where do you start by questioning that?
Do you just pop in their face and be like. Hey, sav are you jealous of me?
What is it that I have that you want?
I kept going around in circles and just finding myself right where I started till I decided Lucas and my stupid brother were crazy and maybe my sister was not happy like I was.
Maybe I don't know, she also doesn't want to be here and maybe she is taking her frustrations out on me.
That makes sense much more than the doubt that those guys put in my head.
I hear loud footsteps on the floor and when I raise my eyes to Kai, am reminded of another doubt in my head.
I said yes to meet him and I drove here to his hotel and sat at the restaurant.
Now I see him walking towards me in his black well-polished shoes that he wore with black dress pants that he toped with a black shirt that hugs him so manly and makes him look so poetic or more like a statue art.
I look at him and it hits me then, who am I to deprive myself of such a man like him?
I really am crazy, where was my mind?
"Hey, I hope I didn't make you wait for me much longer?" He asks walking closer to me and kissing me on the cheek.
His cologne fills my nose and I find myself breathing it in.
He pulls back and walks to sit in front of me. I would much rather have him beside me than a few feet away from me.
"Have you ordered already?" He asks but my mind is not with his question because am still wondering where my brain was when I ran out on him like I did.
"Samantha?" He calls me and I blink out of it.
I reach for the glass of water on the table and take big sips from it before I pull it right back down.
"What is bothering you?"
"I want to be in a relationship with you too." I hear myself say.
"What?"
I get on my feet and start pacing right behind the chair I was sitting on.
"Am confused Kai, it's like I am not realizing the world anymore, nor am I catching up with it either. I don't know things anymore, everything has been confusing ever since we got here and then there is this stupid pact I made with myself to not allow myself to lead or have anything good in this country in case it was going to deprive me of the desire I felt of going back or like I wanted to show my parents that they ruined my life, they made me miserable ever since they brought me here.
But Kai," I pause and stop walking and look at him.
"I think I've been doing the exact opposite of that without me even knowing, I think I've grown up thinking I was showing them how they messed my life without me knowing but besides that, I…uh." I can feel the words get stuck in my throat because it is my first time saying it to someone, to a boy, Kai is not a boy. A handsome man.
He gets on his feet and walks slowly taking his time to get to me.
"Say what you want to say, baby." The nickname makes me melt inside, the way it sounds in my ears, it's like am hearing the word baby for the first time in my life. He is standing so close to me, so close that suddenly the only thing on my mind is him.
I try to look away to collect my thinking again but he raises both of his hands on my cheeks and brings my eyes to his. "Look at me." And I do.
"Now carry on."
I bite my lower lip but I know it's now or never.
"I, for the first time in my life. I met you and you opened this new door that I never knew existed in life. For the first time, you made me feel the things I never knew I was able to feel for anyone. You...Uhm…yo." Now how do I say the next words?
I feel his thumb on my lower lip that I keep biting and I free it from my teeth, I look into his blue eyes and I can feel myself drowning like am being jumped in the water.
I look at him and he encourages me to carry on with the look in his eyes.
I say it looking at him, drowning and taking the courage from his eyes. "You make me wish to love and be loved something that I have never thought would happen with me because I have always felt like my family's love was enough but now, I don't know Kai. You have my mind and what I mean is that am willing to take you up on your offer if it's still alive?"
I get scared when he doesn't say anything, I can feel my inner self crawling somewhere in me to hide when seconds tickled by without any action from him.
Am about to ask something when I feel his lips on mine.
It takes me by surprise that I feel the electric shock run over me and now it's my turn to freeze, not because I don't want to but because; first it's my first kiss, second I don't know what to do with my lips, third what the hell do they do or how do they do it to move their lips to kiss one another.
He pulls back but the embarrassment I feel wouldn't allow me to look him in the eyes.
I lower my head and wish for myself for the ground to open and swallow me. He knows am no kisser.
"Samantha?" He calls but instead of answering, I try to get out of his hold so that I can run away.
But instead of letting me go, he pushes me to the nearest wall which isn't far away because I always choose the very last tables in the restaurant when I find them available.
A gasp escapes from my lips and this time I look up at him.
"I want you to soften up your body." He says and I frown.
"What?"
He leans forward still looking at me and am also trying to act up heroically by keeping eye contact with him.
"I can feel the tension in your body, Samantha. Have you never been kissed before?" I look away, crawling back to my cowardice.
Having never kissed is one thing but admitting it in a situation like this is also another thing that I know am not up for it.
He raises my head and am surprised by how he is closer to mine. "Allow me to guide you, darling." I don't know if it's a question but with his lips brushing against mine softly and teasingly, I know I want whatever it is he is offering, so I nod.
He finally touches his lips with mine but his and mine are both closed.
I can feel one of his hands on my waist and the other on my left cheek caressing my nervousness away and I try to cool myself with the comfort of it until a surprised gasp erupts in me when I feel the other hand of his that was on my waist feeling and squeezing my cheek butt.
I am not given the chance to think of it much because I feel his tongue in me and am taken back to the feeling of it.
He uses his tongue and devours my mouth and I like it so much, he pulls back and sucks on my lower lip and like magic struck am following his guide and also sucking on his lips.
The feeling am getting from what we doing is so surreal and this time when he uses his tongue to devour my mouth, I moan out of pure pleasure.
Am so carried by what we doing that when he pulls away, I groan.
I look into his eyes and he chuckles.
"Breath baby." Am both on a cloud nine and so embarrassed that I don't know what to choose and allow it to swallow me.
He brings his thumb back on my lower lip and runs it over it before I hear him ask.
"How was that?" I feel embarrassed to answer but am not going to lie to him too so I answer truthfully.
"Insanely and madly good." He chuckles at my answer and I love the sound of it.
God, it's so manly and so classy.
I think the next time I will be recording it and keeping it with me.
"I also enjoyed it." He says and I don't help the stupid grin that erupts on my face.
I know it wasn't his first kiss because how could he be so experienced if it was, I don't want to go down the road of wondering how many girls he kissed like that because it wouldn't be fair to my first-time kiss, maybe another time.
He pulls back and takes my hand to pull me back off the wall and it's when I realize that we just kissed like that in a restaurant.
I look around but it's still empty.
'God, what if someone saw what just happened?'
"Can we go up to your suite?" He stops and turns to look at me.
"What?" Didn't he hear me?
"I want us to get out of this restaurant?"
"Samantha if you think something is going to happen after this kiss then let me warn you before you start getting so much hope, that it's not." I frown at him.
"If I think something is going to happen, Kai, I just want to hide my embarrassed self behind closed four walls, what are you even thinking or saying?" I ask him now with a teasing smirk on my face pretending to be dumb.
I know am not experienced in this field of two people getting together who both feel something for one another but I've read books and watched many movies that I care to remember.
"Nothing." He says and then starts walking away from me but am not about to let him get away with it.
I run closer to him and say to him in a small voice that I can.
"Are you implying that if we were to get in that suite and I would strip naked nothing would happen."
"For God's sake Samantha, what's gotten into you now?" I shrug trying to look as innocent and ignorant as I can.
"What? Am just asking."
He leans closer to me and threatens. "One more word and we will stay here, I will ignore and forget all about your embarrassed self." I pretended zipping my lips and throwing the key away.
He just looks at me before he looks ahead and continues walking ahead with steady long walks that always make it hard for me to catch up with him.
I stay behind giggling with myself before I realize how stupid I look and rush to follow him.
SAVANNAH LILAC ADAMS
I knew tracking my sister's phone was always going to be helpful but I never thought it was going to be this useful then.
I knew something was off the moment she missed school and then Lucas also missed the last few classes when he was there in the first. As soon as the school bell rang, I drove out of the school compound and followed my sister's phone and as right as my guess.
Lucas ditched his last classes to come to her.
I just stare at them from my car and I feel bad not hearing what they are talking about, I guess next I will have to install a voice recorder in her phone too.
It doesn't take long for Lucas to walk out of the cafe and walk away.
From what I could tell from what I just looked, the last thing they discussed wasn't agreeable on both sides.
My sister lingers back for a moment before she also finally walks out gets in her car and drives away.
This time I follow her car, she drives through different streets making different turns like she's done before.
And then we are pulling at the familiar place.
I see the design of the hotel and I instantly remember the same post that she posted that I asked her about and told me she was with friends, I think it's time now to uncover who those friends are.
Something back then told me it wasn't friends like she told me and now I am going to find it out myself.
Unfortunately for me this time, I can't sit in a car and get anything so I get out and follow her trying to be as discreet as I can.
She seems to know her way well here but I know it's not her first time here so it doesn't surprise me.
She walks to what looks to be a restaurant in the hotel and lucky for me there are seats outside for those who love views I guess, so I fill one of them that will enable me to look at my sister's table without her knowing.
It takes a little longer before I get to turn and find her sitting with a man.
"Dang it, I knew it. This nasty little liar is not who she pretends to be." I pull out my phone and take pictures of her and the man.
Even though I have the back of the man from where I am sitting, it doesn't matter because Sam's face is full-on display and that's all I want.
Am taking pictures when she finally stands up and starts pacing in front of him saying a lot of words.
This scene looks familiar to those of when the girls are impregnated by their mafia boyfriends they hide from their parents and they are explaining to them that they are pregnant.
"Is she pregnant, now that would be a story for only Dad, not Mom?"
"Guess I will have to check for any weird behaviors from her."
I look back at them and now the guy's hands are on Sam's cheeks.
"OMG, she is pregnant he is trying to comfort her. What could he be lying to her about but whatever I don't care, she got herself into this."
I pull the camera on them again because this time the guy's side is in the camera though it's not clear enough.
You really can't tell who it is unless you know him well.
The scene gets much more interesting when he leans in to kiss my sister. I want to gasp but I hold my hand over my mouth.
"Sneaky bitch." He pulled away before I could picture them but I knew he wouldn't disappoint me and stop it from there.
'Please stranger man, kiss her again for me.' I didn't get to get that.
He pulls away and says something to her before he pushes her out of my sight.
'Does he know am here? Did he see me?'
I don't want to risk my sister's seeing me, I feel a rush of panic run down me before I reach for my back and the coffee I ordered and get away from there quickly.
At least I know it wasn't for nothing because I got something,
I know there is something people say that the first thing in this world is the news, and now I know why they say it because it's true.
Now that I got the news, I know right where to go from here.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~