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Villains Survival Guide

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Synopsis

Chapter 1 - Kidnapped by my own novel

Hmmm.

Did the price of ramyeon go up lately?

I wondered about how bad inflation was as I threw a few cups of ramen in my shopping cart.

As I shopped I mused over a new plotline for the web novel I was writing.

Paying for the items I bought at the register I once again marveled at the rise of inflation.

As I stepped out onto the cold street I tucked my hand into my pocket and wrapped the bag around my other hand.

Shivering slightly I began walking down the busy street.

It was late, probably 11 or so, yet the hustle and bustle never stopped.

The sounds of cars honking echoed in my ears as I stepped onto the crosswalk.

I was buried deep in my thoughts so I didn't notice the truck speeding toward me.

Beeeeeeep!

A long honk echoed, breaking me out of my thoughts.

Swiveling quickly I deftly stepped ahead as the truck zoomed by me.

Quickly dashing to the sidewalk I raised the collar of my coat as people began whispering and pointing.

'Damn that was close.'

I couldn't help but berate myself, however, it was reasonable as I had been under a lot of stress lately.

Despite that, I still had to discipline myself as I hadn't followed the holy doctrine I created.

Rule 37: Never draw attention unless the situation demands it.

As I had no authority figure in my life it was up to me to discipline myself.

I had realized early on not to rely on others to do things for me and to get them done myself.

Hmm, perhaps that's where I went crazy?

Well, not crazy per se but weird.

Ah, who knows why the hell I'm thinking about this.

I shivered slightly as my hand pulled out the key to my apartment, and with trembling hands, I unlocked the door to the dark space.

Quickly closing the door behind me I searched for the light in the dark.

Flicking the switch, I shambled my way to the kitchen and placed the food down.

Taking off my coat I hung it on the rack and began heating up my ramyeon.

My apartment was pretty plain overall, and quite honestly it was empty.

Only basic furniture was there as I didn't have many likes and dislikes.

At least it was a big apartment, though at times it gets pretty lonely.

Ding-!

Grabbing the ramyeon I went to my room and shut the door.

Turning on my computer I quietly ate as the humming of the awakened beast increased.

Typing in my password the screen opened to a picture of myself and my sister.

My sister was my only family and she was in her last year of high school.

But I digress.

Though the reason I was staring at the picture of me was that finding a picture of me was rare.

Especially one where I am smiling.

It's not that I was ugly or anything, actually I consider myself slightly above average.

I just find it annoying to take pictures of myself, and I particularly hate my smile.

It was nothing personal it just made my face scrunch up and look dumb.

Opening up the docs with my web novel I waited as it loaded everything.

I think my eyes somehow rotted even more as I waited.

"Finally" I muttered.

I had a habit of talking to myself though not out loud because that's weird.

Though I have no idea what to write.

I supposed I hit writer's block, after all, I wasn't even a writer to start with.

Well, that's a story for a different time.

I sat there in the darkness silently contemplating.

I haven't been able to write a new chapter for a while now.

The story was the usual, all the web novel readers wanted it so I wrote it.

Monsters invade through portals, humanity bands together to beat it.

Chaos ensues.

All the continents connect and become one and a bunch of other races emerge out of the portals.

The hero is an ordinary kid who goes through tough times and becomes powerful, he has a harem, he goes to an academy.

Need I say more?

As the story finished loading I set my hands at the keyboard, ready to churn out more generic stuff.

Lately, despite my web novels success and hitting 12 million views, the readers had been leaving in droves saying that the quality was going downhill and that the plot holes were too many.

It's hard to write a good story, ok?

Typing away into the silent night I sat there for hours.

Clack-!

Clack-!

Clack-!

"Phew, I finished."

Leaning back in my seat I sighed heavily.

As a 21-year-old, being an author was hard.

However, rule 12 of the holy doctrine states that anything can be done with 4 key factors.

Talent, Effort, Passion, Sacrifice.

Now of course those weren't the only things needed to succeed but it's a good summary.

Talent? I had some.

Effort? Cough, cough.

Passion? Well...

Sacrifice? Too much.

As I prepared to post my latest chapter I noticed something strange.

"The hell…?" I muttered as I looked at the screen.

Quickly smashing the delete key on my keyboard I tried to unlock it.

'Why isn't it working?' I wondered.

If only I knew what was going to happen I might have instead been running for my life.

As I watched the contents of my chapter being deleted I could only lament silently.

Suddenly it stopped.

Everything stopped.

A strange chill crawled down my spine.

My eyes opened wide as the temperature in the room dropped.

Glancing around nervously I didn't see anything amiss.

Turning my gaze back to the screen I couldn't help but gape slightly before realizing what I was doing and regaining my composure.

On the screen, writing began to appear as I watched vexedly.

"Congratulations, your death has been carefully reviewed and the panel of judges has selected you for the exalted Reincarnation program!"

"Huh…" I uttered a sound as I sat there stunned.

"Dead? I'm dead?" I half-choked out.

What kind of sick joke is this?

It's not possible that I'm dead.

How could I have died?

Apparently, that wasn't important as a countdown began onscreen.

When the countdown reached zero everything melted away.

My vision quickly blacked out.

***

"Ugggh…" a slight groan escaped me as I stirred awake.

My eyes blearily opened as my muscles began to move despite them aching.

"What the hell?" I muttered reaching up to scrunch my brows.

Pinching the bridge of my nose with my fingers I groaned as I raised my body.

The first thing I saw when I sat up was a window in front of me.

My eyes went wide as I looked outside the window.

"Holy shit!" My surprise was inevitable as outside numerous structures I thought only existed in my mind appeared.

Hopping out of bed and rushing to the window I gazed outside in wonder.

What lay outside was something straight out of a novel.

Towering skyscrapers were seen everywhere.

3 giant floating islands stood out amongst the hustle and bustle of the city.

Humans bustled back and forth and the loud sounds of the city woke me up from my reverie.

Gazing around the room I was in, I noticed that it was relatively spacious and surprisingly empty.

A large bed with white sheets and a desk adorned the white walls of the room.

'Is this a dream?' I couldn't help but wonder.

Pinching myself I held on until I concluded it wasn't a dream.

Well, this is pretty fucked up, isn't it?

Carefully making my way around the room I scanned it until my eyes found the door.

Carefully making my way over and twisting the knob gently, it opened.

Before me lay a gigantic foyer, double the size of my old apartment.

A large black couch sat in the middle surrounded by gray carpet.

Facing it was a large painting hung on the wall.

In the painting, a couple and their son were depicted in many beautiful splashes of color.

The mother had light brown hair and soft blue eyes that seemed to gaze at whoever looked at the painting with motherly warmth.

Her smile seemed to provoke a feeling of belonging in those around her.

The father on the other hand had striking gray eyes that seemed to pierce a hole through me as I stared at the painting.

His eyes held a cruel light as if he was constantly on guard from something.

His pitch-black hair matched the emotionless gray eyes.

However that all bore a stark contrast to the smile on his lips as he stared at his wife and son.

The son seemed to be about 5 years old as he was being held in his mother's embrace.

His tuft of dark brown hair was neatly combed to the side and his eyes glittered with a foreign light.

His eyes however were unique, piercing icy blue eyes with an inner ring of gray residing inside.

His smiling face bore a happy visage as his hand was raised in a wave, presumably to the painter.

Who were these people?

And why am I in their house?

Making my way out of the foyer I entered what appeared to be the kitchen.

I noticed a few things right away as I stepped inside.

The first was that there were several appliances that I was unfamiliar with and that appeared 'futuristic'.

The second was that on the square marbled island lay a white envelope.

Next to the envelope lay a thin black phone.

Making my way over, I picked up the envelope carefully.

It could have a bomb in it, right?

Maybe?

I guess what would be the point?

Might as well have just killed me before if they were going to do it now.

Carefully breaking the intricate red seal on the envelope I pulled out the sheet of paper inside.

========================

Dear Isaac Moreau,

Your application to enroll at Rosaria Academy has been accepted.

You are expected to be present for orientation on the 1st of January.

Remember that even though you have been accepted, it does not mean you will not drop out as each of our students is required to maintain a certain standard.

Best of luck,

Rosaria Academy Admission Staff.

========================

Ummm, what?

Sitting down on the chair placed by the island, I slumped backward.

Well, huh.

To be honest I'm a bit overwhelmed right now.

You know I do my best to stay calm and composed, but what do I even do in a situation like this?

Somehow I've reincarnated into my own novel?

I sighed gently.

What the hell do I do now?