Neha
It had been two days since my life took a u turn. Two days since I had been locked in my bedroom, since Neel visited.
That day he came back with my favourite muffins, hot chocolate and snacks . I asked where he got those . He replied he got those from late night cafe and convenience stores. Yeah , there is late night cafe and stores but they were almost 45 minutes walk from my house . He returned me my phone. He said he found that at the alley when he was searching for me .
He said how his neighbor saw me getting kidnapped and got injured while trying to save me. He said his neighbor helped him to search for me. I wanted to thank his neighbor.
Neel promised me he will visit me again as soon as possible. And also made me promise that I will take care of myself. He had called me atleast twice in a day to check up on me . Some of my other friends had called me asking why I was absent these days. I replied I was sick.
Exams were coming . Every one was studying. But I couldn't, I was busy lamenting. I was busy hating my fate. I kept asking myself why? Why it had to be me? My dad didn't even wanted to see my face . Mom only had come to my bedroom to keep the lunch and dinner at my table. She didn't even tried to make sure I ate them. She didn't notice my pain, my swollen red eyes , my wet cheeks.
Neel wanted to get a scholarship so that he could study further to become a doctor. I knew he was under a lot of pressure on these days. But still he tried to make sure I had my lunch, my dinner. He tried his best to cheer me up through the phone calls while I tried my best to hide my pain , to hide my hoarse voice . I didn't want to him get distracted. I didn't want to worry him.
He did more than enough for me as a bestfriend. I couldn't ask for more even if I wanted to. I couldn't be selfish. He needed to focus on his studies. As per for me I didn't know what to do with my life anymore. I didn't know if I could manage to pass the exams. I didn't care anymore.
It was Saturday night and I was sitting on my bed glaring at the ceiling. I didn't wanted to sleep. I was scared of falling asleep. I didn't had a proper sleep since the night that changed my life and left me half-dead.
Every night I woke up sweating and screaming. I decided to keep myself awake as much as I could. Every time I felt sleepy , i sipped water to dodge them.
I waited for Neel . He called me in the morning saying he will visit me today . I needed to sleep a little but I couldn't without him next to me .
While I was lost in my thoughts, someone jumped inside through the window. Some one whose name is Neel. He put his back pack on the study table , removed his shoes . I watched him as he came and sat beside me. I smiled at him , which he returned.
" how are you doing? "
He asked.
" fine "
I replied.
" the swollen eyes and dark circles are saying something else "
I laid my head on his lap . He didn't object.
" I am just tired. I didn't have a proper sleep for two days"
I said.
" Nightmares? "
" hmm. I want to sleep "
" go to sleep then. I will be here when you wake up ."
He said while brushing my hair soothingly. I relaxed. I replied with a 'hmm' again as I was already slipping into my dream land.
When I woke up , I saw Neel fell asleep leaning his head on the headboard. His hand on my head . I slowly removed his hand making sure not to wake him up.He must be tired . I felt better after three hour nap. I let him sleep. I sat next to him. The clock read 12: 30.
I was busy staring at the white wall when I felt movements beside me. I turned around. He rubbed his eyes and yawned.
" you're awake ? "
" as you can see, yes "
" why didn't you wake me up ? "
" because I didn't want to "
" didn't you sleep well? "
" yeah, didn't have nightmares . I think they're scared of you "
I said.
" they should. I would've kick them out if they showed up "
We broke into laughs but not too loud . Cause the danger was only a gest room away from us , my parents.
" how are your bruises by the way ? Do they still hurt ? "
" they're better now, doesn't hurt anymore "
He nodded in understatement.
" you're done with your revisions? "
I asked.
" almost "
He said while getting up. I watched him curiously as he unzipped his backpack and pulled out some papers.
He handed them to me.
" they're your notes. I collected them from some friends today ."
I glared at the notes without any emotion.
" what's wrong? "
He asked seeing my reaction.
" I don't know what to do with them anymore "
" what do you mean? "
" I don't have any purpose to study anymore. I lost my motivation. I am a mess. Don't know what to do with myself "
" Neha , what nonsense you're saying . I know you're going through a rough time. But life goes on. You can't stop living. I am not gonna let you waste a year of your life. Don't let the past affect your future"
" I don't even know if I have one . I can't see it. The only thing I can see is darkness "
" it's because you have shut down every source of light "
" I can't do it "
I whispered. Droplets of Tears fell on the notes wetting my cheeks on the way. A pair of hands cupped my cheeks making me look up. My eyes met his.