A few days passed, Natalie was still in fairly regular contact with Nicholas. Although it was a little difficult to adjust because Natalie's work was done in the evenings, while Nicholas could relax a bit only at that time.
Natalie could have changed her live streaming schedule to daytime, but she did not want to do anything like that even once for Nicholas. She did not want to be seen fighting for a relationship in which Nicholas wanted her more. Natalie has pride, remember. She does not want to put too much effort into men.
And up until these two weeks, Natalie still could not feel anything that convinced her of Nicholas. For someone like Natalie, who has a love language of physical touch, being in a long distance relationship feels boring.
Tonight, after Natalie finished the live stream, she also made a video call with Nicholas. The man looks engrossed in playing with his cat while Natalie still has to remove makeup.
[Nat.]
"Hmm?" Natalie spoke without looking at her phone screen because she was wiping the mascara off her eyelashes.
[You will continue to work as a host?]
"I don't know, but for now it's only here that I can earn a lot of money. Why?"
[No, nothing.]
"You want me to stop if we manage to get married? So I just stay at home and wait for the money you give me every month?" Natalie guessed while smiling lopsidedly at Nicholas, who had been watching her all this time.
[I didn't say that, do whatever you like.]
Natalie was silent, a faint smile etched on Nicholas' lips and those soothing words made Natalie still feel strange.
During these two weeks, Natalie had not felt anything bad about Nicholas either. He's too good at everything! It seemed impossible for someone like this to exist.
Nicholas must still be hiding his true self, and Natalie is still too young to judge the real him.
Natalie put down her make-up remover, putting her full attention on the blonde-haired man. She had made up her mind to tell Nicholas this.
"Nic," Natalie called.
[Yes?]
"Looks like I can't do something like this anymore."
[Why? Is there something that makes you uncomfortable? You don't like something about me? Let me fix it.]
Natalie bit her lower lip, wanting her to say that there was nothing at all that made Natalie uncomfortable with Nicholas. She liked everything about him, but it still felt weird!
"No, it's not like that. You're so kind, Nic. To the point that I'm amazed and find it hard to believe that there is a man as perfect as you."
[I'm not perfect, Nat. There are so many flaws in me.]
"But I haven't seen that."
[With time, you will know.]
"But I can't wait any longer!" Natalie exclaimed, surprising Nicholas. She unconsciously spoke in a higher tone. "Sorry, that's not what I meant," the woman corrected, feeling guilty.
[No, just say it. If you don't have feelings for me yet, I won't force it anymore.]
"No ... you didn't force me at all."
[Nat, I forced you to have a long-distance approach even though you already rejected the marriage proposal. Isn't that a bad attitude?]
"You just don't want to give up so quickly and want to prove that you really love me, right?"
[Yes I love you so much. I know I was wrong for proposing to you too fast, but I just wanted to make you mine.]
Natalie looked sadly at Nicholas, her guilt growing even more because until now she did not have enough feelings to return Nicholas' love. There were still many doubts in her heart.
"Honestly, I can't if I'm in a long-distance relationship like this. This is difficult for me, Nic. I can't feel anything because I only see you on the cellphone screen," Natalie said, finally expressing her heart. And maybe if they managed to get married, Nicholas would have to go out of town a lot and even abroad to do his job.
Natalie was a little scared, she felt left out again. remembering the past when her ex-lover suddenly left without any explanation. She can not stay away from the man she loves.
[You want me in Chicago?]
"No, it's not like that. I don't want to get in the way of your work, your business is mostly in Las Vegas, right? Don't do something big just for someone like me."
[Like you, what does that mean?]
"Compared to your job, of course I'm a trivial matter."
[You are important to me, Nat.]
Again, Natalie found it hard to say when Nicholas had said such a sweet thing. How could Nicholas say that so easily? Natalie, as a listener, felt embarrassed.
[Nat, we can't do anything like this anymore?]
"If it's a long-distance relationship, I don't think I can. But I also don't want you to sacrifice your work over there just for me. So please don't overdo it."
Nicholas seemed silent. Natalie felt even more guilty for getting the man rejected again. However, she also did not want to continue this approach, which made Nicholas hope for her even more. Meanwhile, Natalie still did not love the man.
[Okay then.]
"W-what?"
[I can't force you to continue to do this and reciprocate my feelings.]
"Sorry, Nic. You're a really nice guy, really. We can still be friends, okay?" Natalie said, smiling awkwardly. Either she would regret it or not for rejecting a amazing man like this Nicholas Ramirez.
[I'm sorry too.]
After there was no more discussion to discuss, the video call ended.
"I-I said it!" Natalie exclaimed, talking to herself. Somehow the relationship between them ended after this, but Natalie guessed that Nicholas would stay away.
That was for sure, and Natalie had to accept it. It's also possible that Nicholas will no longer come to her live room and give lots of expensive gifts.
As Natalie had expected, Nicholas had really drifted away. He no longer invites her to make video calls, Nicholas also took a very long time to reply to her messages, even though before that he was always quick to reply to Natalie's messages.
There was a sense of loneliness in Natalie, but she still knew herself. Something like this would indeed happen if she rejected the man.
Today, Natalie has to go to the supermarket for monthly shopping. With an oversized cream-colored hoodie and black pants, she only wore simple clothes because the supermarket was not too far from the apartment. Plus a hat to cover her face that is not wearing any makeup.
After feeling ready, Natalie went to the supermarket just on foot. She had made a list of what things she would buy so he would not buy things that were not so important after she was there. Natalie is not a wasteful woman, maybe because she does not come from a rich family, she does not want to waste money if it is not because of the urgency of the situation.
"Another one, cereal froot lops. Ah, dammit. Why are they so high?" Natalie grumbled looking up, the food she used to eat for breakfast was now on the highest shelf.
Natalie looked left and right for the staff who could help her pick up the cereal, but there were none. Natalie sighed, she tried to pick it up with a little tiptoe, but it was very difficult to reach it.
Until finally, a hand helped fetch the cereal box.
Natalie smiled broadly, because there was a kindhearted person helping her. She gladly accepted it. Then she looked up to see who it was. "Oh, thank you-"
Natalie's eyes were perfectly rounded; she stepped back a little because she still could not believe what she was seeing now.
Why is Nicholas here?!