Walking at the road, feeling the warmth breeze hugging you gently while feeling fucked up by the world that is against you. Trying to shatter you will, and spirit. Slow walk and holding out my breath, steeling my heart for it's own good, forgetting that I was once happy and living on the cruel reality, a child's fantasy that is forgetten, matured, and learned how to immune your feeling into pain, I was gaslighted by it. The sound of pain, the feel of it, it keep getting harder to breath, each time and it feels like, even breathing is something I'm not allowed. All I could see is pitch black, no sign of darkness but I kept ahead, and continuesly to walk without guidances.
I'm just a child, too, I need a parents warmth, embrace, but instead. The pain embraced me with care. Gently. Helping me endure the world, and forget about love.
I close my eyes within the room full of knife and darkness, I willfully accept it.
The headache is getting worse, more worst than my mental health, that mental health I never cared for, like they did. They all, treated it as a joke, a simply joke coming from a child while it get worse. Is it funny?
Was it funny?, How come, you guys just laugh while the strings, and trust in my heart fell off, it was completely shuttered.
You guys raised me while my own, blood and flesh is fighting, that's why I trusted you guys, I vented, and that gotta be my first, favorite, and top of my list in my regret's. I hated regrets, I hate you all too. But I couldn't just bring mg self to say It, it was pathetic, a love that is known for fools.
And, I am not a fool.
A wise human being, I have an intelligence, and that is also why I have known too much.
Too much, and it hurts.