Next day in the school after practice, we three (Zoe, Ketty and me) are sitting in the canteen and talking about syllabus related to exams which would be going to start from the next month. Though, technically its only me and Zoe who are actually talking and Ketty is here fidgeting in her seat. After some minutes seeing her not talking to us and continued with her fidgeting so, Zoe initiated the conversation,
Zoe: Hey, Ketty what's wrong with you?
Ketty: (stuttering and with hesitation) Umm I committed a mistake yesterday. Hey, Siya can you forgive me I know now that I shouldn't had yelled at you.
Siya: (Pretending to be angry) Really!! Why should I do forgive you.
After listening this Ketty start looking at her lap, Zoe is sitting beside me so, she nudge at my side with her elbow and in reply to this I just look at her and wink my eyes at her. Seeing this she rolled her eyes as she know I am just pretending to be angry at Ketty. However, after a minute or so by keeping her head down only, she again speak up,
Ketty: (low and guilt filled voice) Umm look Siya, I was hell excited for the party as well as to meet Seth too and this feeling lead me to this. Please forgive me, I will do anything just tell me but please forgive me
As soon as she said this, she raised her head a little upward looking at me and to be honest I am enjoying this. Someone may think or call me as cold hearted or psycho but I just enjoy seeing people asking forgiveness from me or they are kneeling in front of me for the same or seeing them to behave desperately to have my attention to them. Though, most of the time only two of the things happen that is, one when they ask for forgiveness and second when they try to seek my attention. However, here when she raised her head to look at me, I changed my expressions from smirking to pretending to be angry again and seeing this she again start looking at her lap.
Seeing all this Zoe raised her eyebrows at me in confusion, I smiled at her and wink my eyes at her, then I mouthed something looking at her, in a hope that she will understand 'Chill, you will enjoy it, wait and watch' and she nod her in understanding. I look at Ketty again and initiated the conversation,
Siya: (Pretending as if thinking for sometime) Umm, are you sure that you would do anything for my forgiveness?
Ketty: (Still looking at her lap but nod her head in confirmation) Hmmm anything.
Siya: (Stern voice) First look up at me.
And finally she look up at me with guilty eyes which also has hope in them, probably of getting forgiveness. However, I keep my face straight and initiated the conversation once again, on the other hand Zoe has curious expression on her face,
Siya: (Stern voice and with straight face) So, for having my forgiveness you have to do just one thing, you have to buy me...
Ketty: (Confused but curious too and she cut me in the mid sentence) Yeah yeah, tell me what you want, I would buy it for you?
Siya: So, you have to buy me food for my lunch, because I am feeling damn hungry.
After saying this I look at Ketty face which has expression of shock then change to anger and finally her face turned red, this change of expression happened in less then a minute. On the other hand Zoe laughed out loud and I also joined her too, here Ketty get up from her seat came towards us and start beating me playfully. While doing this she too laughed with us, after some minutes we trio get sober up and Ketty settled her self in her seat again, with a smile on her face she initiated the conversation,
Ketty: (Still smiling) Are you mad? I felt so scared and guilty thinking that I may have hurt you badly but here you are making fool of me. And Zoe you too participated with her.
Zoe: (Smiling yet in defending tone) Hey, its not my fault, I don't even know she is going to do this.
Siya: (Take a long sigh) Look, I seriously got hurt with your behavior yesterday but we are friends so, I may get angry, irritated or frustrated from you for sometime, a day or two but not more than this. In the end, I would be with you.
Ketty: Just like this you will come on your own and your friend don't have to do anything for you to come back?
Siya: (Chuckling lightly) Nope. Obviously my that friend has to come, explain her wrong doings and after listening I may get hurt or upset but I would listen to them. One more thing is you have to give me time to recover and you can surely make me normal with good food but I assure you in the end everything going to be alright.
Ketty & Zoe: Wow
Zoe: This is so much deep, from where it comes?
Ketty: Yeah please tell.
Siya: I guess I have seen relationships falling apart, I have seen loved ones fighting with each other plus hating each other. I have also seen people living in the same family, degrading each other and may be seeing all this I have learnt that one person should respect/understand the other one thinking them as a human being.
Ketty & Zoe: Impressive and we agree to it.
Siya: Thank you. However, now we had enough of serious talks so, how about we eat brunch or more specifically I would say Ketty is going to pay up for my lunch.
Saying this we all laughed out loud and Ketty said a word
Ketty: As you say my girls (She winked at us).
After saying this she got up from her seat to get our order done, here we both waited for our food to come plus Zoe to initiated the conversation,
Zoe: You know I never had a family or got any chance to have loved ones but in name of them I have a brother and his wife, though I have never got chance to live with them, they basically adopted me. But for me here, most close and loved one is Ketty only.
Siya: Ohh (Not knowing what to say, I keep my mouth shut. Honestly, such kind of conversation shut my mouth because I don't know what to show/say or how to sympathize with someone)
Zoe: I always thought, having family or loved ones around you supposed to be good and fantastic but after listening to you may be such family or persons dose not exist.
Siya: See I don't know whether such people or family exist or not because I have no luck seeing more of them but it always said that if there is darkness then there is light too. So, may be if there is sadness, fight or abuse then there would definitely be chance of happiness too. Though I keep hoping for that, may be one day you would found something good.
Zoe: (Smiling) Yeah right.
Before we could say anything else, Ketty called me so, I go and help her to bring the food to our table. In thirty to forty minutes we finish our food with some more laugh and teasing, however, I teased Ketty more and Zoe laughed whole heartedly. After our break time as soon as bell ring we left for our classes individually, as we all have different ones. However, when I am walking towards my class Erik joined me in the middle of the way and initiated the conversation,
Erik: (Hesitatingly) Hey, I have a movie to watch and we are going to watch it together at my home today.
Siya: Ohh but I have classes to attend today so, technically I won't be able to watch the movie.
Erik: (Determined) No, we are watching it today that's it. We are skipping the the school because we have quite good attendance in the school so, no harm would be happy. This movie hangout will make me happy.
Siya: Ohh okay we will go and watch. But lets talk late I have a class to attend.
Erik: (Hold my wrist to stop me moving forward) No, we are living now.
Siya: But...
And he don't listen to anything else that I am going to say and drag me out of the school, though after a minute or so it doesn't look like a dragging situation because seeing his excitement and happiness on his face as well as body language I choose to gave in so, I for the first time hold his hand willingly. This I guess surprised her because he stopped in his way, look at me briefly for a minute and I can literally see surprise as well as in his eyes. Though he again start walking and not leaving my hand for a second, it probably took us to ten minutes to leave the school premises, got ourselves settled in the cab and start moving towards his house.
While we are on the towards his house, my mind wonder around my little step of holding his hand and honestly for me this the most biggest step of trusting someone because I never let anyone physically touch me whether it just a mere handshake but ones I do it means I am believing them that they won't took advantage, misread, judge or simply hurt me. Here, with Erik I have taken an year time or more of it so, I somewhat feeling like it won't going to be negative. However, soon Erik voice broke my train of thoughts,
Erik: You know this is the first time you have hold my hand, on your own and you have know idea that how much happy plus peace in my heart you let me feel today.
Siya: Ohh (Yet, again I don't know what to say or should I express my previous thoughts to him. I choose not too because I don't know how he would be going to react about it)
He just nodded it in affirmation but drop the conversation and now I think I may have hurt his emotions by not saying anything but I can't say it as I am afraid to get judged or getting weird comments or reaction about it. However, to my luck we reach reached his home quickly, once we reached at his house door then he opened it with a key so, that mean we are again alone in his house and his voice confirmed this thing.
Erik: We have whole house to ourselves so, we are going to watch the movie then we are going to eat some snacks and lastly, after meeting my mother, you will be going back home in the evening. And now got yourself comfortable on the recliner, I will set up the movie here only. (Point at its direction)
Siya: Ohh Okay (And like as well as he has planned each and everything by himself and not even for once he asked what I want to do. But today also I ignore it, because I just want to make him happy and smile suits him best).
After some minutes he is done with his preparations which is basically, a laptop is settled on the table with splitter plug connected to it which means we can connect our individual earphones in it which thankfully good because I don't want to share it with him. After some minutes he started the movie which is fifty shades of grey. And ladies as well as gentleman this movie turns out to be my first blue film, which according to me can never be the romantic movie. As the movie continues, it filled me with lot of embarrassment, shyness and lot of questions related to what is happening but I can't ask him so, I thought to avoid asking him anything related to movie.
After an hour and thirty minutes around movie got over so, I excused myself and asked him where the washroom is because I have a feeling I started on my periods because I am feeling wet. Once, I entered in the washroom, I get down on the seat to see how much I bleed but to my surprise there is nothing there but some white creamy white patch but I don't know what is it so, I decided at night I going to talk to Jazz because I think only she can help in this matter because she talks about such topic more often.
While thinking this I got out from the washroom after doing my business, when I go out I heard voices coming from the kitchen so, I go there and watched silently as he continue to make evening snacks which I guess bread butter and noodles. After sometime, when he is done with cooking as usual he set food on the floor and we both start having it, honestly this way of eating food I really found full of peace plus somewhat I found its sort of strength bonding of any relation.
As soon as our food got finished house bell ring too so, I ask him to open up the gate and in the mean while I go back in the kitchen to keep the dishes back there. Once I come back in the living room I can see lady sitting there which looks just like Erik, especially her eyes and when I go and stand in front of them. There she looked at me then with her eyes she asked to sit on the couch, she initiated the conversation,
Lady: Hey, my name is Madison
Siya: Hello, my ma'am my name is Siya
Madison: Tell me something about you, what's your future goal as in what you want to become?
Erik: Mom, leave her.
Madison: Shh Erik
Siya: I want to be a psychology doctor, want to treat such patients plus human mind excite me a lot.
Madison: Wow, that's cool and really impressive. Best of luck for your future.
With this our so called short conversation ended and for some time none of us spoke a word which is quite awkward. However, I tried to observe her behavior which is quite weird because she is checking time again and again as if someone is going to come but whenever our eyes got contacted she looks away or pretend like everything is fine. Soon she initiated the conversation,
Madison: I think you should leave now because its already four evening and its quite late for you.
Erik: Mom!!
Siya: (Defending) Yeah I must leave.
With this I book the cab, in five minutes I leave the house after saying my goodbyes to both of them. While I was on the way towards my house all I am thinking about the the behavior Ms. Madison and I come to a conclusion which is, "to say Erik is rude, mysterious boy is an understatement after saying his mother who seems to be queen of the rudeness as well as mysteriousness".
However, I reached my home by six in the evening, as soon as I reached home I got myself fresh and start planning how should I talk to Jazz related to this topic but to my luck or should I say its a miracle or simply coincident that Jazz texted me,
Message conversation (...)
Jazz: Hey, what were you doing?
Siya: Hey, I was just thinking to talk to you. You say what are you doing?
Jazz: Wow, you thought same like I do, cool now tell me what you want to talk about?
Siya: Umm have you seen movie fifty shades of grey?
Jazz: No but I have heard about it, what happen?
Siya: Today, one of my friend made me watch that movie with him and I want to discuss something related to it.
Jazz: Ohh okay, can we discuss it tomorrow night? I mean I can watch that movie in the meanwhile, what say?
Siya: Yeah sure, but hey what you want to talk about?
Jazz: Chill we will do it tomorrow night only on call.
Siya: Okay cool
Message conversation ended (...)
After that I worked on some of my school assignment, study for my exams. Around eight in the night I go for my dinner, then again comeback to my room and studied a bit more and then at eleven I called it a night.